Thoughts Of Contemplation

This is where I will be trying to do daily writing, for the purpose of improving my writing skills and to better structure my life. The posts before 12/01/2022 were imported from the old website Thoughts Of Contemplation, there were some formatting issues, but I am okay with that.

Failure 20/06/2022

Sometimes you just fail, but does that mean you will always fail? The road towards success is paved with failures. That is a part of it, failures that is. In life failures and obstacles will come up and you will have to deal with those things and overcome them. That is the only way to be successful. The feeling of failure does not feel great, nor does it bode well with wanting to continue to go towards success, but that is why so many people fail. It is why success is something that is caveated and something that one wants to show off.

Really it is all about continuing to learn from the failures, and to continue working towards the goal that you are trying to achieve. Most failures are expected, that is the only way to learn and to grow. Pushing through the pain and suffering is sometimes what needs to be done, as the more one draws into it the more painful it becomes and the worse it'll be to continue chasing your dreams and goals.

Nothing is Free 19/06/2022

Consider everything in this world, from the trees to the soil it all came from somewhere, to grow a tree their are things that are sucked out of the world to produce the tree, same with children as they grow and ourselves as well as we live. Energy can't be destroyed, only converted to different forms. The previous post Over Doing, brought up this idea of nothing is free, but the concept really is based on the principals of matter. Now that is all well and good, but doesn't actually provide any substance. If we have something we want, like one of the goals of this blog is to produce $1,000 a month, their must be something that is done. It won't fall out of the sky, content must be written, things must be thought of but most importantly time must be taken from somewhere else in order to reach that goal. Now that is a pretend goal, the goal of this blog is to hold me accountable, and to build a pathway for future people to get some information from and some guidance. Time must be pulled from somewhere in order to make time for writing each day, and then writing every Friday. Then we must also include the time it take to actually do the tasks and to have something to write about.

The cost of nearly anything is time and effort, we may call it different names such as money but what is money? It is the exchange of effort and time. That is the cost of nearly anything, but what is the importance of knowing that? If you want to achieve anything in this world, what are you willing to give up and what are you willing to do in order to achieve the goal that has been laid out. Does it mean not going out 3 times a week? Does it mean waking up and sleeping at a reasonable time? What does it mean for you to achieve the goal.

That is the important thing, nothing is free, we can't create something out of nothing. Somewhere along the line the costs will show up, and sometimes the costs are what are holding us back from seeing progress. We can't see progress because we are not working towards the goal with our entire hearts, we aren't willing to give up anything in order to reach our goals. That is the problem. So what are you holding onto that you know you must give up in order to progress?

Over Doing 18/06/2022

Fix everything right now. Fix it right now. That is the problem isn't it? We have the tendency to want to fix everything, immediately as if we can not take time to fix things slowly and with one thing at a time. We tend to believe that we must fix everything all at once, typically it arises with an urge to fix our life and then we begin to attack everything all at once, leaving ourselves vulnerable to any problem arising that makes all our habits crumble, or something will be missed. We then start undoing all the work we put in, all because we wanted to fix everything all at once.

Now currently this website is my way of fixing things in lmy life, and it seems like things are not always being if you take a look at the projects. That is because I am trying to fix everything all at once, instead of building a solid foundation first then getting the frame of the building up then the electrical; I am building the foundation, the frame and the electrical all at once. Isn't that a foolish idea? Of course progress is not being made in a steady hangable way, and that is a consequence of wanting to fix everything all at once. The best thing that should be done is picking things to work on in stages, ie let's manage my physical health, then my mental health then finances or perhaps the other way around. But sometimes that isn't possible. Sometimes the problem is bigger and the life you have is spiraling and action needs to be taken to rebuild and turn everything around, then what? Well the answer is really simple, a sacrifice must be made. Nothing can be fixed or given or taken for free. Free doesn't exist, sometimes things feel free, like advice from a friend but that wasn't free. You already paid for that by making that friend and by increasing the trust and value each one of you brings to the table. Now that feels very transactional, but the point is that it just happens, but that doesn't make it free. Friends take time and effort, everything does. One must draw from somewhere and give to somewhere else. This is why building one habit at a time and fixing one thing at a time works a lot better because you don't have to shift over everything and everywhere you draw from.

Competition is so low, yes their are billions of people in the world, but a lot of people are at a disadvantage, and a lot of other people are busy complaining about their circumstances, thus they aren't competing at all. It can feel like everyone in the world is your competition, but that is so far from the truth, the biggest hurdle that exists is actually ourselves. We are our biggest competition, not in the esoteric sense, but in the literal sense. How many times a day do you not do the things you know that needed to be done? How many times do you just give up on a task because it is "too" hard, or getting bored and just quitting?

It isn't the world holding us back, but ourselves. This is both insanity and the greatest blessing in the world, it means that we can solve our own problems and gain victory. We are the ones holding, and fighting against ourselves, so if we just stop... We win. That is how simple it is, but in reality it is much harder, and the main reason for that may not be because it is actually difficult but because we make it difficult. The human mind tends to amplify the hardness of something, because it gives us an excuse not to do it. We literally just stop ourselves from being able to be successful, because it is easier than putting a bit of effort over an extended period of time. Our minds are continuously making things seem harder than they truly are.

So how do you win? Get out of your own way, and how do you do that. It is by letting go of the attachment that it must be difficult, now how do you do that? If anyone can tell you exactly how to let go, please tell them to contact me. It is beyond my ability, it is something I struggle with myself, sometimes I am successful, sometimes I am a failure. All that needs to be done is loosen the death grip around whatever it is, and let is slip through your fingers like sand.

Doubling Tasks 16/06/2022

As this post is being written, there is pasta sauce being made on the pot downstairs. As this post is being written, their clothes being washed. As this post is being written... What is happening as this post is being written is multiple things, imagine robots doing your work for you. That is what is happening. It is not the same thing, but it is similar. Maximizing the number things that will occur by doing a single thing is awesome. Consider this post, it is being written but the most important thing that is happening is my own writing skills are improving, or at least not degrading, as well as it is providing structure to my day. This idea of doubling came from Tinkered Thinking - they have brought up this idea of twofers, now this is not the manner in which they intended it to be used for, but it is the manner in which I find fitting.

It is allowing more work to be done, in the same amount of time than if it was broken into it's individual pieces. The sum is greater than the sum of the parts - or something along those lines. The goal here is to not be fighting yourself, and to work in a certain harmony that is synchronic. Meaning once I am done writing, the pasta sauce needs to be stirred, the clothes will be done being washed and then I can place them outside to dry. No wasted effort, and it sorta feels really nice to be productive^2 instead of just productive... It is semi childish, but it is a magical feeling and that is worth it.

Day/Month/Year 15/06/2022

The world needs to adopt the date standard of day/month/year or year/month/day, these are logical whereas month/day/year makes no sense. It makes some sense to be fair, it is telling the most important pieces of information month and day right away, but so does day/month/year. Another key point is day/month/year goes in order of time scales, which feels so right, month/day/year does not go in any order of time scale, it looks like someone just slapped that shit together, and said that is it; that is perfection. They would be wrong.

Some may be asking why is this a topic, how is this relevant to any post done before, or that will come after and the answer is simple. All posts are done day/month/year, and this is a hill I believe in. Nay, not hill but a mountain because that is how important it is. Everyone use day/month/year, be above the pack, be better.

It is easy to fixate on certain things and then to seek improvement on those things. but is it worth attempting to improve those things? That is really the question, because sometimes it very much is not worth improving those things. But isn't improvement always a good thing? No. Now let's say you have a computer, and it performs extremely well but it is known that if you do this one thing which takes around 2 hours to do successfully, the computer will improve by 1 to 2%, but there is a chance that an entire day will be ruined, is it worth it? Probably not, because you won't even feel that difference. If you are successful it is worth it, but the cost of failure is too high. Now if that gain was around 20%, an entire days worth of time would be worth it, because that is a boost that is easily visible, but anything below 5% is not worth it in the slightest. These are things that are important to consider when trying to achieve any improvement. Is it worth the time commitment, is it worth the effort or money spent.

This blog was sorta the same thing, is it worth having, is it worth the $100 it costs per a year to have it running? Was it worth the time to make it, etc etc. In the end the answer is yes, yes it was because writing improves me, keeping me accountable improves my life, and overall success in the endeavors I plan to take on. Would it be worth it if it cost $1,000 a month? Probably not. Everything has a cost associated with it, and it isn't always dollars.

Consider meditation, is it worth doing if all it costs is 10 minutes of your time for all the benefits that are possible to gain? Let's raise the time to an hour a day - is it worth it? Probably. Now let's say someone was charging you $100/month and then was telling you to meditate for 3 hours a day, is that worth it? Depends on the person. At some point the gains seen will be so slim, but if it's an athlete at the peak at their perspective sport, then those 1% gains are massive, or 0.001% gains are still worth it. The difference is perspective and what it means to you, as an individual.

This is the same with body building, to be fit is relatively worth it, and not hugely significant in terms of time needed, but to be at the peak of body building, that is extremely difficult, and is it worth it for the majority of people? Not at all. Consider your own position, and consider where you want to go.

Find Experts 13/06/2022

People frown on shortcuts, because then you don't end up learning anything or you cheated the system and that is true, some shortcuts do not provide the value or help one learn but other shortcuts can be wildly beneficial. I always had this idea that I had to figure out everything myself, and that people couldn't be asked or that would be cheating for when I made it big... I wouldn't have this grandiose story to tell the world of how I did it all on my own. This could be from all the stories I've heard of how someone did it on their own, and them making it seem like the best thing in the world. It's all ego driven in the end, isn't it? I accidentally found a meditation teacher a long time ago, and that made me learning the lessons of meditation speed by, and the guidance she could provide helped me tremendously because it made things make sense. It may have taken me 10 years or perhaps forever to learn or figure out what she told me. I would have suffered so unnecessarily. A part of me felt like damn, I am cheating. I am not doing it on my own, but that is foolish. Who am I, to do it on my own? Or anything? Why prolong suffering?

Today I had a call with someone who knows business, and he told me some things that weren't complicated, none of the words were complex nor did they show any ego. It was mainly just telling me the straight up truth, and just putting what I should be doing in front of my eyes. I could have spent another 3 months avoiding the tasks I know I should be doing, or testing out different ways to do a certain thing, but here was a person, who I believe generously gave me his time to advise me on how best to take action. It was a shortcut. Now the results of the call won't bear fruit right away, but it provided a strong direction as well as information that I would have had to struggle to find. Perhaps finding experts is a sign of privilege, but that can't be it. Privilege implies I have something someone else does not, but I really don't.

We all suffer, we all go through pain, trying to figure out things, but if we can stumble upon an expert we can reach places that would have taken us many years to get to. Now does that mean you should wait around for an expert? No. I was meditating long before I met the teacher I met, who helped me free of cost. Same with everything where I met someone far beyond me. It was me taking action to improve myself, and better myself in whatever field, then I guess I just got lucky.

We setup barriers within ourselves to hide the truth of who we are and the thoughts we have. This can shatter the self inside very easily, because when you are not truly authentic with who you are then the reality that is witnessed is false. Nothing you see or hear is true, because you inherently built the world you live in with falseness because of the barriers that exist that hide the truth. Now what ends up happening is that we end up being afraid to break down those barriers because then our reality will shatter and things will be different, but it should also be creating a tremendous amount of freedom because there will be no more hiding, you won't be able to hide because there is nothing left to hide. Wouldn't that make life so much easier to live with?

That just goes over what would happen, but it doesn't answer how to do the facing of ourselves and getting to the truth. That is something that involves just brute force or perhaps it involves letting go of the attachments to the current reality. This is something that will be experimented and perhaps I'll have an answer.

Avoidance 11/06/2022

It is easy to get caught up in the trap of avoidance, it seems to be a reoccurring theme on this blog. When success starts to come some peoples way they begin to avoid doing work, avoid doing the things they know they need to be doing because it is easier to unsuccessful than to be successful.

We enjoy staying in the comfort of what we know, and the unknown aspects that exist in our life, we push further away they become even more foreign, and we create more shelter in our comfort zone, we begin to barricade ourselves in. This is us trying to protect ourselves, but end up imprisoning ourselves, because we think it is safer and the right way to do things. We end up fucking ourselves over, all because we were scared and avoiding what we must do. It is easy to do such things, and it is even easier to fail to reach for what you want. The worst part is that when we do fail, we begin the cycle of hating ourselves for not putting in the work, and now we have a flywheel working against ourselves instead of for us!

On that note, I am going to start working right now, so thank you for reading.

Down Crested 10/06/2022

The feeling of being sad or just down trodden can be overwhelming and super annoying but it's so easy to draw into these emotions, they are negative and they must be fixed, right? That is the typical response, or perhaps it isn't the typical response but the response I have. It is the feeling of having to fix any negative emotion that arose for apparently no reason (no reason being perhaps avoidance). That is a fucked up mentality, because it leads to this chase of always wanting more, of this ideal world that is perfect.

We end up chasing this perfection that doesn't exist, so we can't ever be happy or content, because it isn't perfect. We look at every flaw and every single instance of negativeness and then use that as a lens in which our world exists. That isn't the case, we are simply twisting the world into a terrible way. Forever chasing some result that doesn't exist.

The goal isn't to draw into every single negative emotion but to draw into life in general which is more stable of what is reality than the moment to moment emotions and thoughts. We tend to ruin ourselves by fixating on one emotion or a singular situation, making that everything in our life. It becomes our sole focus and absolutely crushes us.

Check It Off 09/06/20222

When we think of checklists we may think they would not be useful to our life, but let's consider what a checklist is used for. It is meant to store information and allow one to clearly see what needs to happen. This allows for a significant thing to happen and that is that your brain no longer needs to store that information and keep that information readily available. It is no longer adding to your background stress, instead it is barely in the background. The checklist is the storage device and the way to see what has been accomplished in the day. Imagine doing this every day for a year and then being like what did I do at the end of the year? Well you can easily flip through it all and see it.

That can be dumb, and might not be worthwhile to start doing checklists, so let's remove that. The goal of a checklist is to create a pattern of actions that build on each other without having to think "oh what action do I need to do next?". We want to automate the thinking once we create the checklist, because it reduces the friction to do actions. They are already written out, they are already put on paper, they exist. No need to think about things, just create action and build on that success.

Thinking about the beginning of the day, it starts out by waking up and immediately some actions are taken perhaps that is hitting snooze, or grabbing your phone and watching YouTube. These are nearly automatic, and they impede us because usually they don't serve our needs. We then end up fighting against ourselves from the start, disappointed with how the start of the day began, and trying to catch up.

Now the day has begun and we look at what we need to do, and then feel overwhelmed or kick the can further along in the day so it's not something that needs to be dealt with right away. We are adding more and more weight onto our backs for the end of the day, instead of helping ourselves we are fighting ourselves again. If we take a step back, their are easier and faster tasks than others that can be used to knock down other pins. Perhaps the goal is to go on a walk for 15 minutes, why not start the day with that, then shower and then swap into an easy work task, then build from the start of the day. Take the easy win. This may be why their is a craze about making your bed, it is an easy win task to get the day started. On that note, perhaps I should go and make my bed.

We need to make things easier for ourselves. We should be trying to build ourselves up, instead of tearing ourselves down or just fumbling about then by the end of the day being wired and stressed about all the things that should have been done. Get some easy wins at the start of anything, and build on those.

Maybe this is mentioned in the world, but it isn't expressly conveyed. Building the first few steps towards some sort of flywheel of success is extremely difficult. That part is where the greatest hurdles are, where everything makes you want to quit. It is easy to fall into the trap that others have things easy, because they passed the first couple of steps towards building that flywheel of success.

There is the idea of the law of attraction, now who knows if that is real but to some extent it is. Those who are successful usually remain and gain more success; that is both due to having success as well as actually having the confidence and skill set to be successful. They have already gone through the hell and the pain to figure things out to be successful, they have put in the hours and thinking time. So why be jealous? Simple it is easier. Why complain? It is easier. The simple answer is that they did the work and suffered the loses already. We do not wish to suffer in that manner, and thus we are stuck. We can't get the flywheel started. This leads to floundering and failing, but it is really simple. Just continue to work on the craft and strive for the goals.

It is by the pursuit of something that one grows. If we consider the pilgrims that are referenced in religious texts, it's about a pursuit of something that leads to tremendous growth. Facing some giant monster, overcoming adversity and then rising to the top. That is what is pushed and that is what is told in stories. We root for those people in books and movies, yet we are those people right now. Will you heed the call to adventure? Or flail around, and not reach the success that is wanted.

Where To Begin 06/06/2022

Ideas spring forth like crickets in a field, quickly and consistently and that is absolutely wonderful. Of course in saying that, it's easy to guess that their is a but coming and here it is; but action rarely follows the flow of ideas. We tend to have an idea, and think it is a great idea and then we don't do anything with it or perhaps we do. In doing so we typically end up researching and avoiding doing the work to make the idea a reality. Simply because it is easier to imagine than to do and be successful or to fail.

If all we do is think about an idea or run around it we aren't testing it or making it into reality and thus we live in a world of delusion, no longer basing things as they are but as they could be. I do this fairly consistently and that is a thing that is a huge problem. It stops me from achieving anything. We can not live in a world that does not exist, neither here nor there but that is where most of us live. We say x and then never do x. We are dooming ourselves to ourselves, causing unnecessary suffering in the name of "planning", when in reality it is simply avoidance.

If we take a course on something and in that course or video it lays out some initial steps to do, and then you don't do those steps... What does that mean? Now you may initially think you are beyond those steps, those are steps for losers or people who don't know any better, but no. Or it's possible that the words "I'll do it later" appeared. Either way nothing was done, and so you continue on, nothing has changed. Even little action steps that seem dumb, can be helpful. Action is required for movement and that is necessary to achieve anything.

So where do you begin? Anywhere, if the realization that you began in the middle arises, that is great now you know where to go next. The point is that now their is a reference point that can be used to build an island or a bridge to the idea.

It is easy to view life as suffering being a negative thing, it is but it also opens up a world of possibilities. When we smile for a long time or laugh really hard our face or stomach may begin to ache, those were joyous moments and yet pain arose from them. We can take this one step further and we can also notice how we end up missing the moment of joy/happiness thus suffering again. It seems as though life is just suffering with blips of joy and happiness. It sounds very bleak though...

But it isn't as bleak as it sounds. In the western world we tend to view suffering in a negative way, but it isn't. It simply exists like rain or sunshine, both can be bad but both are good - it depends on what we are sick of. The rain is neither positive or negative, it simply exists. That is suffering in itself, it simply exists. We as people place value and draw into things, such as positive emotions and negative emotions.

If we take the baseline of existence and stick it with the default as suffering, then that would place it squarely as 0, neither negative or positive. We can then be in the positive ie face smiling and then we are back to default which is 0. A completely different point is once it is accepted that life is suffering then we aren't trying to make everything perfect. We accept that things sometimes suck, and sometimes they are wonderful. It is easy enough, but even this idea that things are suffering causes resistance in the heart. Who doesn't want to be an optimist. It is so much better right? So we fight back against the idea that life is suffering, trying to piece something together that is always joyous. If everything was joyous then that would be 0, we would no longer think joy was positive, it would feel bleak. That is the thing, we need it all. The suffering, the joy, the depressive episodes or moments. The rain and the sunshine.

Such a simple concept, but so much resistance arises when we try to accept it. That means there is something to discover.

Goddamn I missed writing, I missed having a sense of purpose. This is a great thing for me to bring back and to actually work on. I apologize for the writing not being perfect, but I haven't done it in so long that I don't really care to much for now. Today I played video games for a few hours and felt miserable, not that they weren't enjoyable but that I didn't have a sense of purpose. It felt as though I sucked my purpose out of my life.

That is how I have been feeling for the past few months, and about 5 days ago it was just past midnight, I was listening to Otherside by Post Malone, and the thought that replayed in my mind was(and that is currently bringing tears to my eyes, for some goddamn reason) "I feel stuck, as if I'm getting swallowed up by a sinkhole - as if I am not progressing or growing. This is a terrible feeling." I was and sorta still am feeling trapped and suffocating in my own weakness. I got a concussion on April 29th, and that put me out of doing heavy work, going to the gym and meditating for long periods of time. That was an extremely shitty feeling, I still can't drive or more so I am scared to drive and I hate being broke. I am a fish floundering on the shore, and I am not be able to the ocean but I can flop back towards it. That is why I am bringing all of this back, bringing the blog back, meditating daily, working out daily etc.

I can't speak for others, and know what they are going through but I imagine a lot of people feel the way I feel. Stuck, and lost in pit of quicksand. I can't help them, because I still need to help myself. The first thing I will be focusing on is just getting my ducks in a row. Starting up Meditation, Working Out and working on my Agency. Each one of those projects will be updated on this blog, with relevant information. If anyone has questions or wants to hold me accountable please do so. This website is putting a stake to my chest and having the internet stab me with it if I fail to try.

I think that is important, I am okay with failing (I have to be) but the thing that is so much worse is never trying. So thank you for reading, and thank you for being the stake and the stabber.

Story Telling

It begins with a story, and it is rarely the first story that we hear, but it is the story that sticks. It is what keeps us dreaming, and believing in ourself or it could be the story that destroys our confidence and twists our attitude towards the world sour. Most stories just arise, their isn't really a choice to be made, until we become aware of a story being told. Then... Then we have a choice to make, do we want to dive deeper into this story, ie it builds us up, or do we want to reject this story. That will determine where we are heading and who we will become. It really is that simple. Now do we have the will power to step away from the stories and to walk the path that we choose, that is the question.

Every thought that occurs within our minds is a potential story that can grow and expand into something tremendous as it'll be repeated and then believed. The idea being that if we thought something, it must be true but that is a false belief. Thoughts just arise, perhaps because we overheard something in the news, or we saw a bird and then thought about fire engines... They aren't us, but we do like to turn thoughts into stories and turn them into us - at least we pretend to turn them into us. So what are we supposed to do? Do we ignore every thought that occurs within the mind? No, but we can tease the thoughts that are arising, and question them. See how they untangle and what becomes of that. But oh my, that is so much work, and that is the point in the beginning. Training up the muscles of questioning and refining the process of building up stories and not becoming encumbered by the thoughts that arise within us.

Fall in love with the correct stories, whatever they may be. Let them show you new adventures and new paths that were undiscovered to the world or perhaps simply not known to you. That is the point of stories, not to be held down by them, but to be lifted up by them, to see them for what they are... Anything you want them to be.

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Behold Greatness

Business books have this whole thing where they must be as conceded as possible. The writer must show the world their greatness, adding multiple 'case studies', when in reality those things they mention are really just to feed their ego. It doesn't actually help prove a point, but to raise their own self image and their hope to get the reader to believe they are god. This is a common theme in business books, perhaps it is because of what they are all about, which is proving that they are the best, or perhaps it is just pointless ego. Does this make those books useless, or mean that someone shouldn't read them? Not necessarily, as their may be one or two pieces of information that is essential to ones growth and knowledge.

Now comes the tricky part, when to stop reading, well that depends on the book. Some business books should be read to completion others the cliff notes will do, but that is the point now isn't it. To distill the knowledge that is within these books, nah, all books to the most important points. Sometimes books are completely full with solid points of use, but most of the time books are full of fluff to hold up the actual useful information. This may be why it is important to be able to read multiple books at a time, and to be able to drop books in an instant, because not all books are meant to be completed.

Who wants to buy a book, and then not finish it right? This is why the public library is a godsend, the books are free and they just let you check them out to read, and not to read. This is a great tool, an asset to a reader. The point is to get the book see if it is of use, and puts a deadline on your reading. Now either the book will be read or the books will be returned without being read. No funds were lost, no harm nor foul. Remember that not all books are meant to be read, and to tear away all the useless information. Get the gold, forget the dirt - as that takes up valuable brain space.

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Changing Exposure

Exposure is such a wonderful thing, it isn't anything special nor anything of importance. It is simply being a witness to something new, or different. When we are exposed to new things, we begin to think and process what we are seeing. We may not gain insight from the things we are witnessing but things may start moving in the background. This is the beauty of exposure, if the people around you constantly talk about meditation then slowly the words they say will seep into your existence, some things may click or the vocabulary that you use will change to match the surroundings you are in. That is a beautiful thing. It is all based on exposure. We aren't sure what things can truly cause us to change but everything adds up. We aren't singular beings, even if you are isolated. All the little things in our life add up, and every interaction impacts us.

This is extremely true as children, but it is still true as adults. If we witness an act of genuine kindness we may feel something within us break and we may end up being kinder. This of course is rare, but things add up, if every time we went outside we saw only kind acts after awhile we would want to be kinder. An easy example of this in our daily life is Youtube or people that we talk to frequently, we will start picking up on their slang and start using it ourselves. Or may start forming opinions of things that we never thought of before. It can lead a person to be jaded and cynical because that is what is comforting them after some painful experiences. Or it can lead us to find peace with things we never thought we could.

Being exposed to various things and to controlled things can be an extremely useful tool. One that we don't usually put much weight behind. Knowing that we have this tool can lead us to results we didn't expect because we can place information or take in content that helps us grow and perhaps builds us up. It can also tell us to avoid things that are toxic to us but sorta give us comfort. An edge to be ridden.

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The Fault

Achieving anything comes down to being honest with yourself about what is truly happening. This means looking at yourself objectively, where are you failing. Where are the lines in the sand being washed away by the waves. Those are the places where one must work, yes play to your strengths but sometimes you can't whole heartedly use all your strengths when being encumbered by weaknesses. The ease of which we lie to ourselves and say that this thing isn't working because we aren't using the right trick or we don't know a specific secret is absurd, it isn't a secret that is hidden in an ancient tomb that will help us. It is doing the work, and to do do it without lying to ourselves. Maybe we aren't being consistent in our efforts, or maybe we aren't actually applying ourselves fully to the cause. We may simply be allowing ourselves to drift in the bay, without any clear direction, but every once and awhile we will paddle a bit and then say it isn't working.

Of course any person worth their salt knows that their are times simply to drift and allow ourselves to figure out where we are headed, and get a breather but most of us don't need that. We need to know the truth of what we are doing and to influence our actions in that direction. To look at the faults that exist within our actions and words and to remedy them. This gives us the best option to move forward without fear of messing up, because the future is being built with assurance instead of fear or avoidance. Mistakes happen of course, blunders occur but that isn't where we sit, it is just on the path we walk.

In the end it isn't anything fancy that gets us to where we want to go, the answers we seek are relatively simple, we simply lack the ability to be honest with ourselves, thus fail to help ourselves in the situation. Practice honesty with yourself and the world around you, it'll take you a bit further, it'll give you a bit more awareness.

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Self Control Vs The Self

It is extremely easy to fall into the trap of Netflix, it's 11pm one more episode later it's 3am... Then a part of you hates yourself for doing it, and for ending up again with a shitty sleep schedule. Next time we will have stronger will power... Next time rolls around and once again it's 3am or perhaps just only 2am... The disgust at the self rises again, but why rely on will power and self control when the solution can be so much simpler? Just delete the app of your phone, or your laptop only have it on desktop or on a TV that is away. Or one could remove it completely, would it then be a problem? Why don't we do that...

The simple answer is because we want to fail, we want to rely on will power and self control because it can fail and then we can 'enjoy' whatever vice we are trying to control. It is just that simple, to remove something completely can also make us feel inadequate because then we failed at controlling ourselves. Why does that matter? Who are we trying to impress? Do we want to go around and say "Yeah I have Netflix and can control my watching." Isn't that a douche thing to do? Yet that is what is happening. Or perhaps the vice is sugary snacks, we bring them into the home and hope we have the self control to eat only one piece and then save the rest for a different day yet that does not happen. If we simply didn't bring it inside the house, then would we have to think about it? Would we even have to control ourselves?

All that energy that would be spent on trying to control ourselves can be spent doing productive things that will help further our lives and improve ourselves. Yet it means that we can't have what we say we don't want. We want to lie to ourselves, and we want to lie to the world with our self control. Be honest, and confront yourself, think about what you truly want. Then stop trying to trick yourself.

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Arising Distractions

When meditating it can become easy to get distracted to fall into the cycle of thinking of random things, and then getting swallowed up by those things for 5 minutes or 10 minutes but that isn't a problem per say the problem becomes when we notice that this just happened and then let it continue. Distractions will always arise, and as they arise we may get swept up by them, but our goal when meditating is to turn our attention back to whatever we picked as our focus. That is successful meditation. It isn't that we stay focused on our breathe the entire time, yes that is great but that doesn't happen every time we sit to meditate, it is a progress thing. It is about calling our attention back to our focus when it drifts. That is successful.

To do this we simply must be aware, and awareness is something that improves with practice. Once we have brought awareness to a situation or an aspect of living then can we act on it and redirect our focus. Otherwise we will always be distracted to no end. It is easy to get distracted by the fact that we shouldn't get distracted but it happens, and it will continue to happen. The thing is not to make it a habit of being drawn into the distractions and to bring awareness to it when it happens.

Perhaps that is incorrect, perhaps it is about being the witness to what is happening within. This includes watching the breathe or any thoughts that arise. We are simply meant to watch and to notice them, not to be drawn into them. Alas we are human so that may simply be an ideal, one that we should strive for.

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Tinker's Disease

It is easy to get caught up in tinkering with things that don't need to be tinkered with. When we are bored and we think we don't have anything important to do, we begin tinkering with things that have already been tinkered and fixed, but alas we must do it again and better this time because what else do we have to do. After spending the time to finish tinkering we realize we should have done x, y and z things that we said we would do when we had the free time. Regret seeps in. Then we think about all the things we could have worked on and instead we choose to settle into the comfortable, the tinker's disease.

It is easy to get distracted and fall into patterns of laziness when it is so easy to do, like knowing that we don't actually enjoy watching Daredevil, but it's something that we can turn on and turn off our minds to. So we hit play, and watch the hours tick by. We could have made the decision to read a good book, stretch our muscles or even just take a nap. All those activities would have made us feel better and caused us to have a better day but instead we choose to turn off our brains. Now sometimes the habits are ingrained in us deeply and it isn't a choice but simply a reaction, and that is definitely fair. Wouldn't it become a choice when we realize what is happening, 3 donuts in we may realize 'oh what about our diet'... We then have the choice to continue shoveling donuts into our body or we can choose to stop and to get back onto our diet. It is fine, until it isn't.

This is why awareness sucks and rocks, it gives us the choice to make the wrong decision and to be fully aware of it, as well as it gives us the choice of making the right decision and to be fully aware of it. That is a beautiful thing. The tinker's disease is able to capture us all, if we allow it. Be aware, think and then act. Simple right?

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Fruits Of Labour

When we start something new it is easy to not feel that any actual improvement has happened. We notice that we no longer suck at the activity or the thing, but we still feel far behind when comparing to our peers as well as just witnessing how we are not as good as we want to become. This can be disheartening because we want to be successful, we want to be worth our weight in iron or perhaps our weight in gold, but alas that is not how improvement or skill happens. It doesn't work that way though as most of us find out, it requires tremendous amounts of effort and energy to improve in anything to a degree that someone would be happy with.

Now imagine if someone was spiraling to rock bottom, and then they slow themselves to a stop, close to that rock bottom but not touching it and they stall out for a bit. That is very impressive, but it is easy to say that is nothing, that "I am behind". We lack the ability to think about how much further things could have gone, and how stopping momentum and shifting it to be stalled or even positive is a massive accomplishment. It is hard to grow and to change the direction of our life, now imagine all the things we are trying to achieve things in. That doesn't sound easy or fast.

As we go about living and doing our actions, we are sowing seeds into the earth and thus trying to improve our future, or we could sow seeds that would not improve our future. Everyday we end up watering some seeds and over time those seeds may sprout and grow into other things. The surprising thing is that some seeds will magically grow into a tree and bear fruit within seconds or days when before those seeds were still in the ground and no sign of life was visible. Yet who could tell anyone that the hard work was paying off. This may be the reason why people say that doing the right thing should simply be done because it is the right thing. We never know when something will bear fruit, or what will cause a positive or even negative seed to sprout. The thing that matters is what seeds are being taken care of, and for what reasons.

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Endless Suffering

Human life is suffering, so the Buddha has said, and the writer agrees. Life is suffering, and joy comes within spurts of it, and we chase that hoping it is the answer to all the suffering. That if we suffer more, we may be rewarded more, or perhaps a better way to put it is that we chase pleasure and try to avoid suffering. We are constantly scared of suffering, and seek to avoid it all the time. When we are suffering, it is usually caused by chasing pleasures and thus choking out those pleasures. When we chase pleasures and try to avoid suffering we bring suffering into those pleasures and that taints things. It is our avoidance of suffering that leads to unnecessary suffering. Simple, right? It really is, but alas we are not simple beings, we choose not to be or perhaps long ago during adolescence we choose not be simple, for simple people were frowned upon. Now a lot of that was repetitive, but in that repitition something can be learned, and that is that we bring forth our own suffering when we try to avoid it, no matter how it is phrased or done it leads to the same result - Suffering.

If life is suffering then what is the fucken point of it? Right? We hate suffering, yet all we do is suffer, then where are we headed if not in a bad place. Yet we find joys and warmth from things and people, and then one thinks of suffering and it seems all worthwhile. It may simply be that we hate suffering, and think of it as the worst thing ever and thus we can't enjoy suffering and learn from it. That sounds sadistic or masochistic but it does make sense, we suffer but nothing is bad until we make it so. This doesn't of course solve the suffering problem, but if we look at suffering some more we can see some similarities as to what causes it to occur. It comes down to not living in the present moment, and this is a terrible thing, Alan Watts has said in his book "The Wisdom Of Insecurity", "At times almost all of us envy the animals. They suffer and die, but they do not seem to make a 'problem' of it." Isn't this the truth of the matter? Animals suffer in the moment, and have pleasure in the moment, and thus do not suffer needlessly. They do not think of the future, or live in the past dredging up suffering and interweaving it into their moment to moment existence. Perhaps that in lies the problem of suffering, it isn't that we suffer every moment of our life, but that we pull our future and past suffering and weave into the present, so all we feel is suffering and pain. This is so easy to logic through, but so hard to truly understand, and to bring into our moment to moment existence.

This could be the reason why meditation is mentioned so much in the world, and how people mention to do it daily and engrain it into our lives, because while sitting you are attempting to focus on the moment, and as we get distracted we pull back into the breathe, into the moment. It reminds us to live in the moment, to be fully present and that is something we can bring to our daily lives. That is the key to our success, and to stop unnecessary suffering from occurring. We can also stop weaving our past into the present and our future into the present. Wouldn't this allow us to enjoy the moments we are in, without painting the world in a brush of grey.

One could easily say that meditating for months on end is a slow way to get into the moment. Perhaps it is possible to combine things, and producing a greater presence, but alas. Who even knows if this is the right answer.

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Ticking Clock

It has been awhile since a post has been posted, or a word has been written whether written by me or the universe that is up to interpretation. It is a a new year and with that comes another year passed, time continues to tick as a fire dims or brightens within us. It is easy to get lost in the world and lost within ourselves and I guess that is why New Years Eve, or a new year is even more helpful, it makes it so time feels like it is passing, and things continue to tick by. This can be a harsh reminder to get yourself in gear and to work on developing a life worth living, whatever that means. That is a question that could take a lifetime to answer. What makes a life worth living?

As these words are being typed that question plagues them, life is meaningless we lost religion to science and thus lost a way to give meaning to things that happen within our lives. Then we try to produce beliefs to replace faith in order to have a purpose, but it comes down to what we want our purpose to be. We are drifting along doing things, but they don't hold meaning, we can have a family but is that meaning? Perhaps it comes down to helping others, but is that meaning? Existence is so hard to define that it becomes nearly impossible to have a purpose, because a purpose has to be so defined and it can't be held up by beliefs but by a unyielding faith. Most of us lack that, now some people decide to drink this question away or get high off of weed to escape the perils of living, but that doesn't solve anything for us mortals that know that, that isn't the solution. So what is next?

Perhaps that is the future, that may be this year to explore and develop something of substance and then try to solve that question. The clock of time continues to tick no matter what we do, so we should pick and choose to do the things that will help us the most, for our present and future selves. Now we could say that that is pointless and we would have a point, but we never know when disaster or a personal tragedy will strike, so by growing and challenging ourselves we are allowing ourselves to have the best chance to face what may happen and come out of it better than we went in, or at least not falling at a 100km/hr into the ground.

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New Year, New Me

With a new year comes new year resolutions and fun little quotes to mention how we are different than we were last year, and how we have grown in x, y and z ways, but in the end we are just us. This isn't a bad thing, but we weary of falling into the trap of saying this year will be different, when their are no steps or plans to make this year different. That will only lead to suffering, and lead to nothing being different. Our actions need to be inline with whom we want to be and then we must build towards that. This is not an easy task because it involves active acknowledgement of what is happening and who we are and what we are doing. It is easy to trick ourselves into thinking we are being productive when really all we do is get up, say we are going to exercise then lay in bed for two hours doing nothing. Perhaps we can lay in bed and read for a bit then get out of bed and exercise, at least then we are being productive. One thing that can help keep us honest is time tracking, making it intentional when something is happening. Is the decision to write being done? Then the writing timer is starting and that is what is being focused on. Perhaps the decision to read is what has happened then start the reading timer and be intentional with it. It is super important to be focused on what is happening in reality vs what is being perceived by the brain.

The brain is the greatest illusion machine, it will whip up the greatest illusions that anyone has ever seen, all to trick us not to go on a walk today, what a waste of effort. It is constantly trying to trick us, and that is why we can't trust anything it says. What we must do is draw into what is happening and what can be seen, and move from their, but even then the reality we see is not the reality we are in. So it is a difficult nut to crack, on how to approach living and how to go about being honest with yourself and what actions you are taking to better yourself or to build a year where if you look back on it you are like yes, I did that.

Keep yourself honest, by giving yourself information that can help you decide what was truly done.

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Building For The Future

Whatever action we take today, is all meant for a future version of ourselves. The current version of you may dislike the gym, but a future version of you may be extremely happy that they had gone to the gym in the past. They are reaping the benefits of the past. That is all that is happening right now. Consider writing, it is a habit that makes one breakdown or express their own thoughts, or ideas that they have heard. That can help the current you, but most likely that will greatly help a future version of yourself.

Knowing this isn't enough though, is it? It is easy to know the right habits or actions to take in order to have a future version of yourself be proud of the past you. It is extremely easy, closing your eyes for a few seconds and thinking "What should I be doing right now to help myself in the future?", you'll come up with a handful of things that would help you tremendously. Yet why aren't those actions being taken? Could it be because we can't see the fruits of our labour immediately? Or is it more obvious than that, is it simply because we are lazy? Of course those two options aren't mutually exclusive; it could be both and even neither of them.

What is a person to do about it all? This is the question, because thinking about a topic is great, but their is only so much thinking one can do, before it becomes sorta moot. Action is needed, an end result... That leads to a fascinating question, does an action or an end result need to occur? It is true that theory and application do not equal to each other, but that does not mean that theory does not provide us with valuable insights. They allow us to explore a topic in a different manner, as well as they can allow us act in a manner that we did not think about before. It is like evolving our understanding from a single dimension to a second dimension, the possibilities grow by a lot, the combinations of possible actions extend further than we ever thought possible. That is the beauty of theory, it allows us to figure ways to put new theories to the test. If we take that approach with our lives, it isn't the same. When we go about living, we aren't always given the answer to everything. We can't always know what the truth is, nor can we know the answer to everything. The vast majority of things don't have answers, because everything is filled with nuance, to the point where one could spend a great amount of time trying to figure out the optimal paint drying setting, to get the perfect coat. Could that be useful? Of course; is that ideal? Probably not. The point being is that what about letting go of things, how does that fit into the puzzle of actions being necessary? It could be said that inaction is also an action, as it is a choice that is selected. If that is the case, then we have a perfectly wrapped gift.

Back to the question at hand, what is a person to do about it all? The simple answer is whatever the future version would want to be done, and since we can't know what a future version of us would want we can only go by what we think we want for the future. If our intuition states that it is healthy/good then we can strive towards it at full blast or attempt to. We can then simply ask the question, is this something we would want the future version of ourselves to be doing? If the answer is yes, then proceed, if the answer is no then reevaluate.

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Environmental Spaces

I currently have a single space where I do everything from meditating to working to exercising and even sleeping, this seems like a good idea and easy to switch tasks but it also makes it easy to fall into bad habits. The idea of splitting up your environments is something that is thrown around a lot, but it isn't something most of us think about for living our life.

We may not want to drive or walk to an actual gym, but when we are at the gym we know what we are doing. There is no computer or anything that you have as a distraction. We are at the gym to workout, and to get healthier. It mentally makes it easier to workout because of that giant split between home and the gym. We now have this individual space that is just meant for doing that single activity. This should make it easier to build that working out habit, and to also be more focused while working out. Of course now we must dedicate some time to get to the gym and then to workout for perhaps longer, whereas when it is at home we can choose to workout whenever we want and we can do it for as long as we want. That is a great benefit, but it also has a drawback of saying "oh I'll do it later".

Now not everything can be split up into having its own space but attempting to split things into their own space may be helpful. Ie not using your phone while in bed, and perhaps doing that in a chair or perhaps a couch might make it easier to fall asleep. Or it may simply be annoying.

The important thing may simply be testing things, where we try doing the gym in a separate location for a month and seeing how we feel or 2 months, and then not using your phone in bed for a month or two and seeing if that makes a difference. Every single person is individual but others in the world have offered advice or ways that they live. This means we have things that we can try on ourselves based on others existence. We can fine tune things, and see what works for us. Perhaps it does mean having different spaces for different things, or maybe it means that we don't really need to do that as it doesn't impact our life in a positive manner or a big enough manner. We must consider the cost of doing something, ie in terms of money/time/energy/etc.

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Silence Is Golden

Silence is a way to see into ourselves without outside distractions, we have to face who we are and who we think we are... Or we could choose to ignore it and drown it by drinking or by giving into noise. This is perhaps why meditation is so useful, it gives us time to see within ourselves and allows us to attempt to perceive reality as it is, not as we want it to be.

Meditation is typically conducted in silence, and same with most yoga or breathing classes. Silence allows us to really get us in tune with the world and with ourselves. Being able to fully hear what the body or thoughts are trying to say and giving us the ability to ask questions and see the responses within us. It truly is a gift, as we can achieve silence at anytime - if we have the right tools, or live in a less populated area (so perhaps not anytime). Since we are with ourselves 24/7 we have to be able to understand what is happening within us and the world around us.

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Annoyance In Silence

If you have ever been camping for an extended period of time, silence becomes a comfortable friend something that is constantly there and that is peaceful. It may not be done on purpose but we become comfortable with silence, we no longer need or require constant stimulus.

When we get back to the real world, we start craving constant stimulus from our environment. It isn't that we need it, but that we have this association built up, where when we are in this environment we normally have some kind of stimulus constantly on. We can easily start to get annoyed at how much we crave silence but expect noise. We get stuck between our new normal and old habits. Yes, this current version of you that prefers less stimulus and is more attentive is something that the old version of you may have wanted, but now that it was accidentally achieved we have this sense of annoyance. We can't listen to what we used to, we can't enjoy movies or video games. We start feeling annoyed at silence, but also at peace in it.

This is a very interesting place to be in because it is such a rich experience. We can learn so much about desire and the constant struggle that we are in. These two completely different wants and how they play with each other. It is sorta magical. The greater our awareness of it, the more we can see it. How we seek to feed both, but really want one to win. All the choices are laid out nicely, should I turn on Netflix for the sake of having it on, or just sit down in the quiet. We have these options clearly available because we aren't on auto pilot anymore. We are comfortable with silence, and we desire noise but noise is bothersome when it is on. This is a wonderful place to be in, because we can see what we really want, and how we want to be. We aren't limited to fighting against ourselves. If anything we are in harmony.

The idea of harmony is a weird one, because we are fighting against both sides, trying to figure out which side is the right one. It is similar to the yin-yang symbol, neither is right and they both flow with each other trying to find a balance, sometimes more 'good' and sometimes more 'bad', in the end they both exist. As we start to gain more good habits, we can see more bad habits within ourselves thus the balance is maintained. Or perhaps that is simply an illusion and a perfect being does exist. Then does that mean we should strive to become that perfect being? Probably not, seems like a tedious and unfun goal. Maybe it is the annoyance and peace in silence that is golden, watching the fun little battle within ourselves that is perfect.

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The human body is extremely fragile, it can easily be broken or injured but our minds are even more fragile. They can easily be broken or twisted simply by a few thoughts or when we realize we may have been lied to our entire lives. We have these beliefs and ideas that we hold onto, that we shape our lives with and when they shatter everything we thought or believed shatters with them. We are insanely fragile when it comes to our beliefs and our thoughts.

The thing is, is that we can't live without thinking or creating beliefs, at least I haven't seen anyone being able to live like that. What we seem to end up doing is not questioning our beliefs or thoughts and thus we are stuck with them. We avoid poking and prodding our minds because of how fragile they are. We then end up making them more fragile and thus life gets a bit harder. Then it gets a bit more harder. So forth and so forth. This ends up becoming a bubble that we think is safe but is even more prone to popping and shattering than if we were to poke and prod our own minds. The goal that we should be striving for is to continuously question our thoughts and beliefs to allow our minds to be comfortable with losing beliefs.

We enjoy the comfort of holding onto our beliefs and not changing our minds, because it is easier. We sacrifice the future, for the present. In the end we are doing ourselves a disservice by avoiding confronting ourselves and asking those difficult questions. It is understandable that we wish to protect what is fragile, and that makes us want to protect our minds but it comes at a greater cost and that is the destruction of it by an outside force. Consider how controlled burns of forests are a thing. It is easier to do the hard thing to yourself than it forced upon you by others, where you have no control or manner in which you can slow down the descent into chaos.

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Off The Tracks

Once you start something keep moving forward on that thing until it is complete or a milestone has been reached. When we stop in the middle of doing something we end up losing our train of thought or the momentum of action and then when we come back to the task, it can't be completed to the level that it could be previously. This is all due to some outside or internal distraction that occurred and derailed us. These distractions don't need to be any longer than a few seconds to have a negative impact on us. We simply need a quick distraction for everything to come crashing down, and it is easy to have the belief that everything will be fine if we get distracted and that a few minutes won't do any harm but it will.

It takes energy to get started on something we may not want to do, then it takes time to get into a flow state while doing the task, and this all adds up. The second we get distracted we now have to deal with getting into a flow state but also have to deal with the fact that we have lost our train of thought. Right this second a few things may be trying to get your attention and distract you from working on the task at hand. This is costly, now it does cost us some willpower in order to reject distraction and for us to focus on the task, but that is cheaper than restarting or getting derailed.

This is where all those self-help, productivity things come in handy, where they inform us to remove all potential distractions. They are right, every single distraction is expensive. It is impossible to remove every single distraction, but we can definitely remove a few and that will help us tremendously. We should be trying to make it easier for ourselves to stay focused. Life is difficult, life is suffering, so why should we make it harder on ourselves?

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Acting Upon Actions

Thoughts are a wonderful thing, they allow us to plan out the future and think about the past, but they are also a huge time sink. When we start thinking, we continue to think without really taking any action to improve things so we end up in a place where we feel stuck but don't know why. Actions allow uis to enforce our will onto the world and thus change ourselves in the process. It is a gift that is given to all, but few choose to act on it.

When we think of all the plans we come up with for working out, or getting our business off the ground, how many of those actually get followed through with? We use thinking as an excuse not to act. A common phrase is to continuously fail over and over again and every once and awhile you will get a success and thus learn from that success. This can be done over and over again because every attempt allows for learning to occur. Every action provides us with some progress, this doesn't always mean progress in the same dimension but it means that growth is happening. Actions allow our brains to process a new dataset, and that is where we can learn the most. The more datasets our brain goes through, the better our understanding of what is happening as well as improving our success rate.

This post was originally really good, but then someone called and the mind became derailed. Alas this is what is left over.

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The Devil Within

When we see something bad within another person, or perhaps the things they do wrong, we can learn a lot from that. Instead of simply dismissing them as terrible or useless, we can build on it. We can implore ourselves to see them fully, what things are bad, why are they bad, and what about ourselves. What things are we doing that are bad, and how can we learn not to do the bad things this other person is doing. This seems like we are judging the other person, and it is, but it is also learning which can help us improve ourselves. We should also then think about what good traits they have, and see how they impact things. The key is is that we all suck in some ways, and we all rock in other ways, so the best thing we can do is learn from others!

One lifetime is not long enough to learn all the lessons of the world, and this is where cultivating the ability to learn from others mistakes is so important. It skips a huge step, which is not making the mistake ourselves. We end up learning without the negative consequence of actually messing up. This is one of the highest forms of gifts anyone can provide us, and people are constantly providing this gift to us, and we in turn are providing it to others. The problem is that most of us don't wish to accept the gift or do anything with it. We simply toss it aside, and say "I'm glad I'm not that guy", we don't learn anything. Then we become that guy, and we may end up realizing how we messed up and thus correcting it or we may simply not have the awareness to know what is happening and end up continuously messing up in the same way.

Perhaps awareness is needed, to figure out what is happening around us, and at the same time reflect on ourselves and see how we can learn from the things happening around us. This isn't easy, we can't simple wish this into existence, but we can slowly train ourselves. This can be through meditation or simply writing down or tracking when we are aware of something, thus bringing that thought or idea forward and allowing us to catch ourselves doing it more often. We can also employ others to help us. Friends can start pointing things out if we miss it, so we can further advance our own self awareness, and catch things.

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Simple Stories

We have the tendency to avoid the simplest method not because it is difficult, but because we can't fathom dealing with the fact that it is difficult, ie we have to plow through our fears. Instead we would rather run about searching for a fast and simple method, even if that takes a dozen years because we are solving the problem or so we trick ourselves into believing. We aren't solving the problem, but happily avoiding it. Going into our fears and attempting to solve the problem and provide comfort to ourselves is a lot harder in the short term, but it also solves the problem a lot faster. It doesn't involve trying to figure out the smartest or most efficient method to solve the problem, it simply involves action and doing. This is actually a lot faster than finding the smartest or a more efficient method and anyone can do it.

The fact anyone can do it, is also something we have a tendency to avoid, because we want to be special. We end up over complicating problems in order to feel as if we overcame some big ordeal in a fancy and new way. Instead of simply doing the thing, for the sake of doing it and improving ourselves, and not for the sake of telling a story to others. Perhaps that is the real reason why we avoid the simple method, it doesn't make for a good story to tell others. A story to tell others... That is completely ego driven, we want to tell the world all the good things we have done, as if we will get a reward from some great deity, or the people. When someone tells us a story, what thoughts go through our head? Or better yet, is this person always trying to make themselves out to be great? Or do they simply get the job done, and they are proud of themselves? These questions are important, because they may lead us to learn about ourselves and figure out why we want to take the complicated way, and what kind of story we wish to tell.

In the end it doesn't matter for the why, it may make us feel better if we know the why, but it doesn't really matter. What matters is the actions taken, and what is done to improve things. Are we avoiding the simple method because it is harder? Or because we want to tell a grand story? If it is harder, why not break it apart into smaller things. Slow and steady steps.

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Nobody Is Coming

The problem that youth today face, or maybe everyone faces at one point in their lives is the idea of someone coming to save us. Saving us from whatever suffering is happening to us. This means we may just continue to suffer in the hopes that someone will come in and solve the problem without us having to lift a finger. We end up putting ourselves in a position of weakness, of wanting pity from the world which leads to suffering without any change.

We may know people who do this, and when they do we may feel as if we have to save them ourselves or help them, but wouldn't that simply be reinforcing the notion they have about how they will be saved when they are suffering? Consider that method of when a baby is crying, what is supposed to happen is that we are supposed to let them cry themselves out, and thus ween them off of crying for help. This can be very difficult to do, because it means we must ignore their supposed suffering.

Adults aren't babies, but the idea is still similar. Now sometimes a person does need help, because they can't figure something out that they have been stuck on for awhile, or they may simply be trying to dig themselves out of the hole they are in, but aren't digging out a stairway or a tunnel up. Help should be given, and giving out help shouldn't be something we overthink, but it shouldn't be just thrown around willynilly.

If we pull back a little bit and assume we are the ones that have this problem, the idea of someone coming in and saving us (ie providing a business opportunity, or giving us money or perhaps fixing our mental models), then we can understand the problem better and perhaps even solve the problem for ourselves. This need to be saved may arise from a lack of being saved or protected as a child, or it could be because we were saved or protected all the time that we think that we can't live without it. Either way the cause of the problem may not matter, what does matter is how to solve it. Perhaps it is simply going forth and solving our own problems, ie not waiting for someone to come save us. When that thought of "someone will come save me" arises, we simply pat our own backs and continue forward into the void that we wish to be saved from. We end up having to be our own protector to, what is commonly known as, our own inner child. We must provide the comfort and then be willing to walk forward all the same, knowing the fear and the avoidance. This method probably isn't the easiest but it is the simplest. It involves going forth, even when afraid, and knowing that things will be alright either way.

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Moon Life

When we think of the ocean we think of calm seas and how nice it is, but sometimes we think of or see the rough waves and how dangerous the ocean can be. Perhaps not dangerous but scary. We think of how powerful it is, and how it could destroy us in a heartbeat if we are not careful, yet we never think about how powerful the moon is. The moon causes the waves to be so large or the seas to be so extremely rough, yet most of us aren't scared of the moon. It is fair to say the moon is more powerful than the ocean, but it isn't as scary. So the question becomes is it power that scares us or the use of power that scares us.

When we talk about use of power, we are talking about how the flex of power causes us to be intimidated and thus afraid of that power. Whereas the non use of power leads us to believe something meek and thus we shouldn't be afraid. This ties in nicely with the moon, we think the ocean is causing the flex in power so we can be afraid of that, but when we think of the moon it doesn't do anything so it isn't as scary. Yet from thinking about things lightly we can easily infer that the moon is extremely powerful.

So do we want power that is hidden like the moon or the power of the ocean that is simply for show and holds no real weight behind it? Or perhaps power isn't something that we bother with. Then wouldn't that mean we would be getting pushed around and are constantly under the influence by others?

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Over Committed

When asked if we can do something, it is easy to say yes to the first thing, and typically the second thing as well, but then comes the nth thing, and now it is a lot harder to say yes but we may still say yes. Now we have to do all these various things, and in the beginning it was easy. We could do a great job at it and still feel good to do more things, then the nth thing came about and we began doing shitty work and feeling terrible. If these are reoccurring yes's then the next time we end up doing them we may end up doing shitty on the first thing because the refractory period didn't reset. If we had just said yes to a few things, then we would have had the rest we needed and the ability to do great work each and every time. We spread ourselves too thin.

This is the problem with commitment, it is easy to say yes without thinking in the beginning then we begin to realize how many commitments we already have. Our desire to say yes to really great opportunities decreases and then we are sorta stuck, we should be saying yes but have to say no. This is a missed opportunity. Of course we didn't know this when we started to say yes, we had no idea. That is the thing, we didn't know, and we can't ever know. What we can do is actually think about things before saying yes, thing about the long term impact of saying yes, and what that involves. How much attention or effort will x require, is this something that is important. All those questions are vital when taking on commitment, and sometimes we don't know that commitment is required from us as it was just saying yes. That is okay, it is a part of living.

Continuous assessment and re-adjustment is required from us, we must realize the cost of over commitment, but we can't really understand it until we experience it ourselves. So over commit then realize the stress and the pain of saying no when you really want to say yes.

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A Thousand Tiny Swords

Thousands of thoughts cross our mind every single day, and out of those thoughts how many of them are negative, or how many of them are doubts? We tend to have not the best thoughts for the majority of our day, or perhaps we used to have them, in the end we know how it feels to have our self be somewhat crushing. That is an important thing, because it allows us to understand others.

If we take the giant leap to assume we understand others or that they are similar to ourselves then we can begin to discern that they also have these thousands of thoughts daily. We can then assume that not all the thoughts are good or pleasant. Then wouldn't we be more compassionate to others? If we were going through our thousands of thoughts and they weren't the best thoughts, we would want compassion or for someone to reach out, doesn't this mean we should do that for others? It is easy to assume that others are simply bad, but what if they are just like us? They have struggles, we have struggles.

Every person is in a war that is unknown to us, and we don't consider that when we get upset, or when we get annoyed. We just assume our own war is the only one. Every person has tiny swords coming to stab them, whether that is from the outside world or the internal world, we all have struggles and pains. Some are really good at hiding it, others aren't. Some may not have that many compared to others, but it is a lot for them. Each one of us is different, and each one of us has suffered and will suffer, that is the cost of living. That is the price of joy. Compassion is what is needed, for ourselves and others.

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The Eye Of The Observer

When we are envious of another person or even a thing we tend to hate on it. We believe that if we hate on the person or the thing, that we are somehow above it. Consider how on social media or even in person we see others and even ourselves putting things down because we think they are foolish and they shouldn't be successful. In some sense read that makes one feel foolish.

When we feel hateful, what we are usually feeling is jealousy, that they have something we don't and how they don't deserve it. This is extremely valuable information about ourselves. It tells us exactly what we need to work on or what we need to reflect upon. We are seeing where our inadequacies are. Perhaps we are jealous of their work ethic or the amount of money they have. Perhaps it is something to do with how good they are with the relationships in their life. All of this is valuable information for us to learn from. This gives us a chance to see ourselves completely vulnerably, all our faults on display for us, and perhaps even the world.

Every time we can see what is actually happening and what is going on within us. We can then dissect what the other person is doing better, and what we need to do in order to achieve similar results. That is the gift of jealousy, it allows for the self reflection then the change in actions to occur. Isn't that the best gift possible? The ability to change?

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The problem we tend to run into when doing dealing with other people is that it isn't personal. That isn't fair to say. It is personal to the person, but not against you, the individual. If someone says no to a sales pitch or no to being asked out, it is a them thing, not you thing (most of the time). Consider what experiences they may have had before you, or better yet consider all the stereotypes ie the fast identifers your brain uses to categorize people automatically. We may not even know someone at all, but we may have built up an image of who they are, and thus may reject their proposal instantly.

This isn't personal, it is just the way it is. This also doesn't mean that things can't be improved, improving yourself or your skills is always helpful, but it isn't everything. We are shaped by the experiences of our past, and that means that others are also shaped by their experiences of the past, and thus we can't control how they will act or react to us. It is completely unknown, at least if you are a decent human being. The key is to continue trying and attempting, without taking it personally, which is difficult as we think it is an us problem. It may be, but that is where self reflection is important, perhaps the pitch sucks, but it also could just be the wrong people for you or your business. The aspect that is important is trying and slowly improving.

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Scaling Fear

Fear begins off easy, when we were babies we were scared of loud noises, when we were barely in our teens we were scared of failing tests and not being popular, but we were no longer scared of most loud noises, when we are adults we may be scared of commitment or of getting rejected, but no longer scared of failing an exam. This is progressive fear, we began with being afraid of little things, then we conquered that, and a bigger fear appeared relative to the first fear and we must conquer that as well.

Fears scale over time, becoming bigger and bigger when not addressed or when ignored, this leads us to have a lot of huge fears and worries because we weren't conquering those little fears that appeared. Those little fears were once at the edge of our comfort level and once we conquered that we could see some new fears that were at the edge of our NEW comfort zone, and so forth the cycle goes. The difference here is the habit of approaching and dealing with fears is occurring, so we can see new ones and we increase our comfort zone. That is growth. Now the second we stop increasing the size of our comfort zone, fears that we couldn't see from our zone now start growing and approaching the zone. These fears are much harder to deal with, because they didn't exist until we stopped growing our comfort zone and approaching the edge to deal with threats. They began to fester in the shadows and grow, now we feel stuck.

We start to avoid approaching fear all together and then anxiety increases and life just becomes harder. If we are the ones who are feeling stuck, then hit out the little fears, and build upon that. Increase your comfort zone little by little. Slowly swallowing up all those fears.

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Lost In Paradise

Happiness in every moment, that is what we think we want. We want to be lost in paradise, never having to worry or to think really, but just enjoying life; that is the pinnacle of living, right?

The idea that happiness is the goal seems rather foolish because when we are happy, we are suffering. Imagine smiling for an extended period of time, our face begins to hurt. Alas that isn't being lost in paradise, more so thinking happiness can last forever without any negativity. Being lost in paradise may be just as bad, it is attempting to keep our heads in the clouds, avoiding any responsibility because it doesn't exist. We end up avoiding any real hard work, because of keeping our head in the clouds, or we just say how it doesn't matter or that it is useless. If that was the case, why does this idea of hard work keep re-arising? Or the fact that suffering, or those lows add to the highs.

Consider a sling shot, it must be pulled backwards before it can launch an object forwards, that is similar to life. We must be willing to suffer, in order to appreciate and enjoy happiness otherwise what is happiness? It is just normal everyday living, special isn't special when everything is special. When we choose to keep our head in the clouds, we aren't really living, we are just drifting. Living involves experiencing everything to it's fullest, the negatives, the positives, the suffering and the delight. That gives us such a richer experience of life, and makes us grateful for when things are going well. As the old saying goes, "This too shall pass."

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Oh, Preacher Man

Most people preach things they themselves do not fully understand or that they don't do themselves. As the saying goes "do as I say, not as I do", but what we say and do matters. We try to do what is expected of us, and what is the 'right' thing to do, instead of saying what we are doing, or the truth as we see it. Perhaps it is that we want to see the truth in a different manner and that we want to believe in what we are preaching so we preach it so that we can understand it. That makes sense, we want to do what is perceived as right, or as the best. No person wishes to be seen as weak or as incorrect, so it is easy to guess why we tend to preach.

We also preach to grow an audience, or to be on the right side of history, but history hasn't been written yet. It is written by the victors, and yet no one is victorious yet. We aren't trying our best to be victorious instead we are letting others determine victory. Now this is taking things to an extreme in some sense, but it doesn't need to be taken there. If we just look at those who preach, maybe they have experienced what they are preaching for or against, and thus are trying to inform people, therefore I am the cynic. This is completely possible and may be what is happening. So the question really becomes how does one know if someone is preaching for attention or preaching to help, as intention matters.

This isn't something that is simple, so it can't be written done in a single sentence, but involves exploration of the world and of people. So perhaps the best course of action is holding off judgement until you know why someone preaches, or perhaps seeing if they are a real person ie having problems or changes in attitude. They may just be copying and pasting stuff to be popular, who knows.

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At Your Own Speed

A lot of people speak about how one should live life at their own pace, figuring things out and slowly building things out, but how many of us can truly say that we have or had that ability at a young age (think early 20s, mid 20s). At the time there was most likely panic that you were getting old and that if the goal wasn't reached by 25, 30 or 32 then everything was moot. Life was no longer worth living and everything ended there.

Now when we become 40 or 50, some people still feel young and that life is just beginning as they have some shit figured out. Their business has grown, and they finally are starting to live the way they thought they would, or they are still enjoying life. They think back to their 20s/30s and laugh at the idea of this is when x, y and z should happen, yet we can't help but feel that we should have things completed. If a young person hears that advice, they may try to understand it and realize it but most of the time they can't. It is hard to ungrain something that is already ingrained in us. This is where meditation can sometimes be helpful, it forces us to slow down, and then also hits us with the fact that we can't rush anything. It either happens or it doesn't. We can't predict when the timer will go off, or anything. We are simply living.

Gary V says it best, be fast in the micro and slow in the macro. This means to focus on working hard in the short term, but to expect things to take a long time ie think about the entire picture. We need to realize we have time, but that time is reliant on the fact that we are doing things now. As well as if aren't just putting things off for the future, because then in the future we will need time, but we won't have that time. Things continue to move, even if we decide we don't want them to. The only choice we have is to realize that the time line is wrong, if we think it'll take 2 weeks, it will probably take longer, if we think 2 years, it'll probably take longer. Actions take time, and same with plans, the key thing is to continue to move in a direction! This doesn't remove the fact that we have expectations of where our life should be at a certain periods of time. So what can we do, perhaps just be patient, and try to drill something into our brains or stumble upon a realization. It may not be able to be forced into us. This brings about something else, force. The fact that it may not be able to be forced into us is both a good and bad thing. We can't make something happen immediately but we can work towards something and that is important. Alas this may still not help us figure out a way to realize we can take life at our own pace.

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Who Owns Us

We were given names at birth and most of us stick with those names, some of us change them, but they are just words being spoken by others yet they are dangerous. When we publicly live with our name on our back and chest, it will be used as a weapon. We then can be targeted by media or people on the internet, can easily lose our job or get in trouble for doing absolutely nothing or perhaps for saying our opinion. Yet, those things aren't wrong to do? Believing in something doesn't make one guilty of anything, yet we are guilty because the mob decides we are. This begs the question of is it better to be anonymous on the internet, where no one knows who you are, or is it better to stick your name on everything?

If we stick our name on everything, then when we say something now that we think is right, buy a few years down the line we disagree with that previous statement, someone can easily use the past as evidence of current you. That isn't the case now is it? When you were a kid, you probably thought eating cotton candy all day was a great idea, now you probably don't think you could eat a lot of cotton candy, let alone all day. That is because we grew, and we learned. Isn't that what life is about? Changing and growing over time, alas that is a topic for a different point in time. If we were anonymous could things be weaponized against us? Of course, but it isn't us they are attacking, is simple a skin we are wearing; we can easily shed the skin off and continue to live our lives. That seems absolutely wonderful. Then again one could say that we should have a right to live and change however we wish, but who respects rights? Definitely not people.

Perhaps it isn't about our name, but the idea that we aren't in control of how we are perceived and how that can have a negative impact on our life, that actually is the problem. A name is just a bunch of letters, which are a bunch of characters, which are simply a bunch of scribbles that we assigned meaning to. Then the question arises, how can we say what we want, and not worry about being lynched by a mob that doesn't care for context or a media that is just trying to compete with TikTok?

It may just be having influence and money that isn't tied to one thing, and to have a way of surviving that doesn't rely on public sway? Or the easier answer might just be to be anonymous on the internet.

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Where The Fault Lies

Billionaires should stop spending money trying to get to space and instead should plant trees. Poor people should stop eating out and learn to save money. When we hear said statements they annoy us, because how can someone else tell us how to live? Or how we should spend our money, they don't know us and it is our money. Isn't that also the case for billionaires?

We like to blame billionaires as if they should be solving all the worlds problems, but why? Didn't they work hard to make that money? To hold onto the money and to spend it creating more technology that will help us? They seem to be able to do more with the money than most governments, so how can we tell them how to spend it? Wouldn't it be better if we took the worlds problems, or even our own problems and tried to solve them ourselves? This seems simple, but it is even simpler to blame another for everything and not look at ourselves. We are our greatest problem, we tend to believe that it isn't us but others. We would rather give up all agency over ourselves than to admit that something may be our fault.

If we could blame ourselves, we can then have a chance to create change in the world, by changing ourselves. It isn't a bad thing to find the fault that lies within, because it is allowing us to grow, instead of just withering as a victim, we can prosper as an individual. A victim's circumstances never change, because no action is taken to create that change, so what can be expected? Perhaps we think nothing, but it isn't nothing. It is going into the negatives, when we stand still the world continues to move, so we are technically going backwards. We should be expecting to get worse, for our situation to continue to decline due to our lack of effort and lack of finding a fault within us.

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For every rule their is an exception, for every rule their is something that doesn't fit and that is for all generalizations as well. When we generalize we are trying to simplify the world for our brains to compute it all, and by doing so we are eliminating the details and painting as one would say with a broad brush. We aren't really concerned about the details, or what is actually happening, we just want the pieces of information and store it in our brain then forget about it. We want the generalizations, we don't want anything more. A simple way to put it, is that we want the reward of reading the entire article and doing our own research, simply by reading the headline. That is what we get when we generalize concepts or ideas. As it's been said before, the devil is in the details.

Does this make all generalizations bad? Not at all, generalizations allow us to function as individuals and as a society, we generalize to save on precious brain power (that we waste away anyways hahaha). It honestly allows us to handle huge swaths of data or information and deal with it, now that we have computers and the internet we can use generalizations even more, if we have a general idea and some understanding we can then find the details within a few taps of a screen, this allows us to actually know what is happening without using up space in the brain. Though this only goes so far.

Even though we can google any of the specific details, if it is for something that you specialize in, then the details matter. Those minutes that get wasted on every google (assuming that google has that specific knowledge readily available) add up, what is worse is that google doesn't have the details available to find within seconds. The more specific the question, or the topic the less likely their are solutions that are posted for people to see.

Generalize, but know when to go specific, when to remember all the details, ideally we can remember them without trying, but alas that doesn't always work.

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Power Of Knowledge

Being knowledgeable about a multitude of things allows us to connect dots that would be missed by others. It can allow us to find the hidden gems that others think are junk because they can't discern junk from gems unless it's on a golden platter, and that is where most of us lie. We fail to have a deep well specific knowledge, instead opting to read the headlines of everything thus having a shallow amount of knowledge of many things. Now having knowledge over many things is useful when trying to figure out what one likes, but it isn't useful when we need to figure out a solution to a problem or figure out if something is worthwhile (at least most of the time).

The deeper our sea of knowledge the more actions become possible because we are actually aware of what is possible. The common phrase "knowledge is power" has some grounds because it is through having knowledge that one can influence the world, we can teach others, we can invent new things from knowing how older things work because that is the foundation that was used.

If we think of knowledge in a general sense, it is sort of just memorizing facts and information. It isn't anything special, but when we get into the nitty gritty of knowledge, it is about connecting those facts or information pieces and using them to form elaborate or even simple jigsaw puzzles, each one telling a different story and allowing for new things to be created or discovered. That is the true power of knowledge, it is giving ourselves the ability to create our own jigsaw puzzle, it isn't about the actual pieces of information exactly, it is more about what we can do with those pieces of information.

In science most rules have exceptions, and that seems to be the case for all generalizations.

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Guilt Ridden Joy

It is easy to get caught up in guilt ridden joy, and it stems from the lack of action or the feeling of wasting time. Guilt ridden joy is when you find joy in doing an activity that you also feel guilty for spending time on, some may consider fiction reading to be such a thing. Finding joy in mundane activities or in actions that aren't directly beneficial to you, isn't a bad thing in the slightest. Joy is a wonderful thing and should be cherished when found, yet we can easily feel guilty for being happy about this random thing because it isn't improving us.

The guilt is the problem, nay it is the solution. Feeling guilty over doing something fun shows us something about ourselves or our actions. We may feel guilty because we aren't working hard enough in our endeavors, or that we skipped a workout, or failed to do the things we know we had to do, choosing instead to have fun and enjoy ourselves. We are then tainting the joyous event or action. This is all just showing ourselves what we are, or what we say we value but aren't acting upon.

Our brains don't like the cognitive dissonance that occurs when we say we will do one thing and then do another, because what is happening is not reality. Reality and our mind don't matchup very well, so guilt or pain may start to arise because we know where we are letting ourselves down, or where our mind is poking and saying "this isn't reality". Words can be very easy, but the action to follow through on those words can be difficult and that is where reality is created. Just as one can be inspired by words, but without action those words end up being choked by our dying breath.

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Agree To Disagree

As we go about living, we start to create agreements with ourselves. We figure something out, and then we make up a belief of that thing, so the next time we see that thing we already know what it is, thus confining it to a nice little box. Now imagine people, we do the same thing to them. We see them then confine them into a nice little box, if they end up changing do we update the box? Not really. Most of us don't even know we can update the box as for most of our lives if something went against the norm, we would create a new box and say that it is an exception to the norm. We pin people down into their box because it involves a lot of effort or brain power to switch them or to update the box.

This is why when we seek to change our lives, it can be hard being surrounded by people who know us, because they have a definition of us. If we skip and move ahead 5 years without them, we have changed a lot (hopefully) but when we see them, we may begin to act the same as we were or we may be true to our new selves. That huge chunk of time missing can allow for an easier time updating the box, but even then it isn't a guarantee that the box will be updated. Change is hard enough as it is, but it is made harder when we expect others to accept our new selves. We get placed in boxes and those labels rarely change. Though we are more likely to change that label to a negative one, because our brain looks for negatives, it doesn't spend as much time looking for positive changes because that doesn't really inconvenience our lives.

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Known Ego

When we think about the ego, we may think we are above ours. That we don't have an ego, but is that really true? Could that be our ego speaking? That is the thing with the ego, it is elusive and difficult to pin down, when we do we think we have expunged it completely but that is impossible. If we got rid of it completely, we would cease to exist but perhaps that is the point? To no longer exist, and to simply be one with the universe?

If we take a step back and think of the ego has a lamp in an extremely dark place, and we are inside of this place, we need the light in order to see. As the lamp light gets brighter and brighter, we begin to notice that we can no longer see. That the light is actually blinding us from seeing anything, that is now a massive ego. If we start to make the lamp light weaker, the room begins to get darker and it gets harder to see. Then their is the sweet spot where one forgets about the light, and simply lives. Noticing it when it flairs up, and noticing it when it is going out. Taking care of it. Perhaps that is what we must do for our own ego. This is of course just one idea, others have posted other ideas throughout time.

Now the flip side could be to remove the ego completely. Now you can become one with the darkness instead of being afraid of it. How does one remove the entire ego? Fuck. If. I. Know. Though ideas do come to mind. Perhaps it involves meditating and noticing what is arising and how it is arising, and where we are, if anywhere. Or it could involve a shit ton of psilocybin. Hard to say, meditation feels like the slower more stable way of doing it, slowly piecing apart our ego and figuring what actually remains, definitely leads to a greater understanding of things, instead of simply skipping all of that and then just preaching.

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THe beautiful thing about hard problems is working on them to the point of solution, and not a permanent one but one where we can point and say "Yes it worked!!!!" that is all that is required. Hard problems aren't easily solved, even if someone else has solved them before it does not make them easy for an individual to solve them, google can only get you so far. The rest is up to you.

The first thing about a hard problem is to actually figure out problem is trying to be solved, ie the 'end' goal. That gives us a general idea of what must be done, but that doesn't get us started. We must figure out what is the smallest step in getting us towards the goal, or the solution, sometimes this just involves learning things around the solution, because we don't know where to start. So the best thing to do, may not be to look for things but to simply start. This means trying out various solutions to the problem and throwing water at a wall trying to get it to stick. Then as we begin throwing different things at the wall, we figure out what sticks better. We go from throwing water, to throwing mud then perhaps to throwing honey (or perhaps smearing honey). Overtime our knowledge base grows and we figure out what works, and this is simply be figuring out what doesn't work, this is how apes do it. Dumb apes. Isn't this better than being a smart human? Where we sit and think about a solution but never do the solution, because guess what? That involves effort and the chance of failure.

The idea of failing fast and failing often is spoken about greatly in the business community but that is for a reason, it makes sense. It allows us to figure out what sticks, but this also involves getting over our own ego, or need to be right or 'smart'. We must be willing to fail, and to try different things to solve our hard problem. In the end we may realize it wasn't that hard after all, but that we simply didn't know what we didn't know.

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Available Excuses

Life gives us an infinite amount of excuses, we can find them anywhere all we need to do is look and sometimes even that isn't required. It just happens, the excuses just pile up for anything and everything. When we don't want to do something or we don't fully believe in ourselves, we come up with an excuse and use that in order for us not to fail or even try. It is as easy as eating cake, or perhaps raspberries. Easy. The excuses lay around us, and we just pick them up whenever we need them, easily lying to ourselves about the truth.

Excuses just come, we don't really need to look for them or even put in any effort to find them, we just do. That is a huge problem, they are low effort and provide us with this sense of deservingness (ego) that makes us feel special. We crush all our hopes and dreams by using an excuse and then we sit ideally wondering what happened, or why we are where we are. It is simple, we chose it. We continuously sought out excuses in order not to do what we know we should. We lied. We gave up before we even started. To what end? That is the question. How many times must you avoid something in order to finally feel fulfilled or happy about it? The answer is quite obvious if you think about all the excuses you have ever given. Never. That is it. It is impossible to feel good about it, because a small part of you knows that what is being said is a lie, and that can create unrest within.

As Little Dicky put it "the choices are clear, ho[...]" so what will you do dear reader?

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When we think of life, we think of what could be, or better yet we think of what a perfect version of life could be. We also hold this belief that life can perfect, that we can fix everything and be perfectly happy, and sustain that with minimum effort. That may simply be because it is not possible, or perhaps it is a manner in which we bend reality into something that is unattainable. This bending of reality just leads us to have unrealistic expectations and thus end up in a hopeless situation. We expect the world, but can't even fathom our own backyard.

This longing for having everything be perfect and just happiness all the time isn't totally false because if we accept that life is suffering and that pain is meant to occur, thus not allowing ourselves to get attached to what is happening then in some weird way one begins to respect and enjoy suffering. So they are 'happy' and having a 'perfect' life, but it isn't that. This is what it may mean to have a perfect life, but even that can be perverted. It isn't that hardships and struggles don't happen, or that nothing effects these people, but that they are okay with these things happening. That is the thing, suffering still happens and it still sucks but their is no attachment to the suffering, meaning that they don't believe that suffering is a personal attack.

The thing the modern person or perhaps all people seem to forget is that life is suffering. The best example of this is when you are laughing a lot and your stomach starts to hurt or your face starts to hurt from smiling. Try this right now, think of a happy memory or something precious and focus on it really hard, and over time your face will start hurting. That is suffering within happiness. It is easy to try to imagine a life without suffering but actually think about how boring that life would be. Even if that life involved sky diving, or traveling the world. After some time that just becomes mundane, now you have a new normal. New suffering will start to occur, boredom will arise from things that used to excite you, or provide a thrill. Over time you will search for greater and greater thrills because that is the only thing that will make you feel alive. It is similar to how people who start in on porn, first it is simple then it gets into crazier and crazier stuff, because you have become desensitized to what you would normally watch. That would be how a life without suffering would look like, suffering would still creep in, simply in different ways.

The best thing to do is to let go of the idea of suffering not being a thing, then you can experience life and accept it.

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Inspired Living

To be inspired is to have the greatest gift in the world, it is something that can be taken for granted extremely easily because guess what, it is easy to be inspired, but it is much harder to carry that in your spirit. This means to use that inspiration to craft a new world, and that involves building up habits and setting intentions.

Inspiration is a springboard for better living, and yet we treat it as if it is something that occurs in every moment, but perhaps it does. Can't we be inspired by a childs laughter, or by the way a leaf rides the winds? Isn't that inspiring, doesn't that count? Or perhaps we are counting the countless motivation videos on YouTube? The idea of inspiration is to improve ourselves, and to live in the moment, not to get distracted by dreams. Dreams are a large part of being inspired, so that would be incorrect, it isn't to not get distracted by dreams but to inspire us to actively chase our dreams. That is what is actually happening when we get inspired. We are given permission to dream and to chase those dreams and that is a beautiful thing.

This post is somewhat all over the place and perhaps that is due to the nature of inspiration, I was inspired to write this, and in that I was lost in inspiration. Lost in the various thoughts of what it could be, what purpose it holds and why it should be cherished.

Inspired yesterday, and then nothing changed, inspired today, and will tomorrow change? Time will tell, but perhaps this is the cause of inspiration, it gives us a chance to see a better life for ourselves, and it is up to us to build towards it or actually make that dream into a reality. The dream being what was inspired and what that caused.

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Realization Of Compounding

When we work on something daily, we can't tell what is really happening within us. We get lost in the movements or the actions, it is easy to forget that actions are building upon actions and so forth. This leads us to quitting things that we should be working on daily, or not believing in the idea of compounding. The real problem lies within our lack of faith in the process. We haven't ever seen the power of compounding because it is easy to forget how it works, or perhaps is it that we seem to not believe that it will apply to this situation or that we can make it work for us. So what do we do? We end up quitting.

Now imagine a practice where the results can some what be seen, but really it is hard to tell if a difference is actually being made. Then imagine where at the end you get something, the entire lump sum, the results all at once. It becomes obvious then. This blog has a ton of content, a ton of words have been typed out, but it feels like nothing. This action of daily writing almost feels useless in the sense of how does it make a difference to the actual word count, or what is a word count. The second you transform a blog, and all the content written into a physical book, the results speak for themselves. We can easily see the effects of compounding, we realize how little effort applied over time, makes such a huge thing. An actual book.

This seems to be hard to apply to other things, but it really isn't. What it means is that we must become creative. Consider working out, take a picture and record measurements, then every month or week take another picture and measure again - then at the end of 6 months of daily workouts you can see the difference. If we try to do this for coding, can it be done? How can we bring a coding project into the physical world? That would be extremely useful, to be actually able to see what has been done in the physical world. I don't have an answer.

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Cost Of The Past

Our past self has already lived and a part of us is that past self, but something that is ignored is that the past is over. This means that any regrets we have should be forgiven. Easy to say, but hard to do. Our past versions did what they could with the knowledge they had and the ability they had, this may be inadequate for the current version of yourself, but that is all that could be done. The past is over, but it lives within us. We can either hold on tightly to the past and thus cause ourselves pain and not allow us to build towards our future, or we can forgive ourselves.

This is a hard thing to do, because we can easily hold grudges against ourselves, not on purpose but because we are human.

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Living In Comfort

Living in comfort is easy and we think we desire it, but do we really? What comes with comfort, happiness right? But that isn't it, now is it? When you are comfortable boredom arises, pain finds a way to seep in because what is life without discomfort? Without a purpose or something to push against. We fade into obscurity when we sit in comfort for too long, we may start feeling more negative emotions and just the feeling of not getting things done. This is why life has ebbs and flows, it needs change in order to feel alive, consider a heartbeat. Now that isn't the best example, but it doesn't need to be. All we need to do is think about our life, and the past; once we do that, then we know the truth.

Truth is that a comfortable life has discomforts or things that are being worked on that provide the user, ie you some resistance and that makes you frustrated. This is essential to living, yet a part of seeks comfort. We crave comfort, it makes us feel safe and we don't need to worry - yet we need worry, we need the 'bad' stuff in order to have a direction. Perhaps to a point, it is possible some people who are extremely secure in who they are, and what they do that they don't feel the negativity. More accurately they let negativity ie worrying or pain influence them in a negative manner. Thus to them those negative emotions may just be a part of existence and that is all. In the end they too would say it is necessary to have discomfort.

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Deciding How To Be Busy

In life we will always be busy, busying doing this or that but busy all the same. We could have nothing to do all day but we will somehow be busy, or find that doing nothing is being busy at a later point. Maybe our busy is cooking or watching Netflix or learning. Maybe it is hanging out with friends or family or perhaps even work. We are always busy, but what does that even mean?

Being busy means anything we want, but the core issue is as @TinkeredThinker put it is "deciding exactly how to be busy." We will always be busy, but we can decide how we are busy, what things get our attention and what things don't. We can choose to make ourselves busy with nothing or busy with something and we can even decide what we are busy with. This is one of the great curses of being human, we are always busy, but the gift lies in being able to choose how we are busy.

When someone says they are busy, it is not a fib they are busy but what is actually being said is at this current moment this is not a priority. In this current moment. This doesn't it isn't important, it just means right now something else is more important. So when we say we are busy, what are we choosing to be busy with? Is it money? Family? Or simply nothing expect laziness (doesn't that hit the sac hahahaha). Of course sometimes it is nice to be busy with nothing, but most of the time it isn't nothing we are busy with. We are busy with thinking about doing something and not actually doing it, but that is a topic for another day.

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Done From Scratch

When we start to build something from scratch we may be making the initial design inferior to what already exists out in the world but something magical happens when we build something from scratch. We end up actually understanding how the thing works! We must understand in order to make something from scratch.

The first iteration will not be perfect, but over time it will improve and can be enhanced to meet your needs and even wants. It isn't stuck the way it is because someone else made it or elements from others were taken. Everything about the item made from scratch can be replaced and changed this means if something goes wrong it can be fixed (most of the time). The idea of building from scratch is to develop a stronger understanding of the material and how it all fits together and that simply strengths over time because of the struggle that was gone through to learn the material.

If we were to build something using things that are already rebuilt, then we forgo a lot of learning because someone has already done it. Someone else used their brain so you didn't have to, and thus the struggle to learn wasn't there because no learning was done. It was all just done for you. This idea also applies to listening to podcasts, it stops us from exploring or thinking about things further because someone else has already done it for us. Someone has created thoughts and we ate them up, and stopped trying to figure things out.

Building from scratch leads to us stretching our mental muscles and really digging deep into how and why certain things work. It is a gift wrapped in a cursed box.

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Badly Enough

The question isn't whether you want a thing, it is what are you willing to give up? What sacrifices must be made in order to achieve the desired goal or want? That is what should be determined, perhaps that means less time goofing off, or watching Netflix and more time working on learning? Or perhaps more time working or spending time with family?

Everything requires a sacrifice and most of the time we aren't willing to give up anything, we would rather stay the same than change for the better. We would rather sleep in or eat the extra donut than fix ourselves or improve ourselves in anyway. Imagine working out daily, that is easy, now imagine giving up something in your life like your brownies, some time and actually applying effort. That dream now becomes harder to achieve, not because the dream actually became harder but because we not noticed what was actually required from us. What are we willing to give up? Or better yet what are we willing to do?

The greatest threat to humanity is humanity, and yes for global warming and everything else, but for an even bigger thing. We are a threat to our own potential, we crush ourselves and don't reach our potential at all. We don't want it badly enough, we barely even want it, it's just a nice to have. A nice to have is never achieved. It is the strong desire for something that makes us sacrifice something to achieve it. We must be willing to give up something. So what will you sacrifice?

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Baby Blanket

Overwhelmed and confused, or perhaps just feeling lost, these are all feelings that people feel, some on a daily basis some on a yearly basis, but we have all felt it. When we feel this way, what do we want? We want something that we know, that we understand and that has provided us with some sort of comfort in the past. We reach for our baby blanket, this could be an actual blanket or it could be a book we have read before or even a show we watched before, this is our version of a baby blanket.

Why is this important? Simple because life can get overwhelming and having something that can sooth us or comfort us is useful. We reach for something familiar because it is safe. This is why we would rather go backwards than forwards because we know backwards, we don't know the future. We want the thing that is doable and less dooming. This really applies when we are spiraling or when we are overwhelmed, a familiar/comfortable thing will make everything feel like it is not crashing around you. Distractions also help with this, because it comes down to not fully paying attention to the moment or what is going on within or around you. It is all about escaping what is.

A question may arise, is this something someone should reach for? Or is it something that we should be avoiding, as it is good to travel into the unknown

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Pushed Aside

It is extremely easy to push aside living. It is easy to not do the work that one knows they should be doing, or the work they said was important, and instead do things that are fun, but better yet they provide a strong distraction. The world is full of distractions, pulling us away from our potential but the real curse is the self.

We are the greatest threat to our potential because we may be seeking out distractions and avoiding doing what we believe is right in order to 'relax' but actually we are simply distracted, and are giving up on living. That is the real problem, we are giving up on living and instead are choosing to be distracted for the majority of our life. Perhaps we may choose to live in the last moments of our life ie a few years, then at least we can say we lived for a bit, but most people wouldn't live ever. It is easy to forget what we want to do, or who we want to be.

It is the choice of willingly pushing aside what we determined is important, it is the awareness of knowing what you are doing isn't aligned with who you want to be, but merrily a distraction to provide some comfort in the moment.

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The Definition Of Happiness

The definition of happiness may not be as simple as a line, or as simple as a paragraph, it may be very individualistic but their are patterns that exist in the world from person to person, from century to century and those patterns may simply be what happiness or what fulfillment is, it's definition.

We can discuss happiness, but happiness is fleeting and changing constantly, a better word is fulfilled. What does it mean to be fulfilled? For some people it is being surrounded by people whom they love, for others it is working on projects that fuel the heart, things that push them forward in the world but which one is right? It may just come down to personal preference and perhaps a mix and match. Maybe that means 85% loved ones, 15% personal project, or 70% personal projects, 30% loved ones. Or maybe it is something entirely different, but the question isn't about happiness as that is fleeting. When we grin ear to ear for an extended period of time our face begins to hurt, but that is happiness for a moment then pain mixed in. So is that what means to be happy? To be in pain? That is highly unlikely, but it does tell us something about happiness. It can't last forever, and this is why fulfillment is a much better option. Can it last forever? Probably not, but it is forever morphing and that is what makes it something to be inspected.

So how does one become fulfilled, if that is the goal? Perhaps it is impossible, or perhaps it has to do with passion and really finding joy in doing something, not always but when it is achieved. It could simply be a matter of action without the story. Fulfillment involves some sacrifice, and it involves some pain, but with that comes joy. It is connected and that is where the magic lies. It is where we must try to stay in.

This doesn't really tell anyone anything though, how do we achieve fulfillment? Perhaps it is about finding something that you are willing to sacrifice time and energy to, this may mean jumping around and trying a bunch of things or it may simply be digging deep into one thing, and really just going for it. Attempting to get the best version of understanding.

But who knows, this could all just be lies and fibs. It is impossible to tell.

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Maintaining Relationships

The goal is to be there and to attempt to communicate, most problems can be solved by communicating. This obviously applies when talking to others, but it whole heartedly applies to ourselves. We must communicate with ourselves and try to figure out where we are going wrong, and how we can improve ourselves to better serve those we care about. It is easy to lay waste onto others, and to blame the world for failed relationships, whether that is friendships or dating. Easy to tell another they aren't communicating or they are the problem, but maybe it is an us thing. We aren't communicating with ourselves and what is going on within us.

A good relationship involves two people, but really it involves 3 or 4 entities. The first 2 are the individuals but the second two are how they interact with each other ie do you talk to yourself to figure out what is going on with you emotionally, or physically? Are you trying to solve the things that are wrong within you? Or just running away, or better yet not even noticing the things that are wrong. Simply thinking it is the other persons fault or it is something within them that is wrong. It may just be them, but sometimes it is ourselves.

When we think of what it means to have a good relationship it involves communication, but more so it involves understanding the other person and yourself. How can you show up for them, and how can you show up for yourself, in a manner that is sustainable. This doesn't mean you lick the ground they walk on, or ghost them for many months. It involves active action of engaging with the other person. Perhaps this is too much for one person to handle, or perhaps it is the lack of self awareness that has led to this not being done.

A relationship takes work, and a lot of it. It isn't a hop skip and hippty, it actually involves a ton of effort, some people want a million people around them, and then they can't maintain any of them, so all those people are meaningless. Some people only want a handful, and that is enough for them, because they can put their entire heart into those relationships. And some, they are just lost.

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It is about putting in the reps, and that is why these posts continue to come out. It is about doing it nearly everyday in the hopes that this can be applied to other things in my own life. Consistency is needed to live a good life as we can only grow when we put in enough reps.

The reps do not get easier as time goes on, but the incentive to keep doing them increases with time put in and reps completed. It doesn't get easier to actually do, we simply find more reasons to do the actions and that is all that changes. We may want to find a shortcut, but most of the time their isn't one. We simply need to put in our time, and put in the work and that is all that can be done. Personally I hate that, but it means their is no secret so why keep looking for one? No magic bullet.

There is something important in that. No magic bullet, no secret so just put in the reps and the time.

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Someone Has Optimized

The world has 8 billion people in it, then in all of humanity roughly 100 billion others have lived and died, perhaps a bit less, yet we think we know best? That we can't learn something from someone else? I doubt many of us have lived 100 billion lives, or even a dozen, most of us have barely even lived a single life, yet we try to justify that we are teh smartest or we have the best optimization in living.
Life is very custom in terms of how each individual lives, each one of us needs to figure out what works for us and what doesn't, but we can't figure out every secret of the world now can we? If we take in information from others whom have figured out life then we can optimize and test things out ourselves. We have people who are experts in fitness, why not test out their suggestions? Or perhaps experts in thinking, why not take their suggestions? Life is not a solo endeavour, but something that is joint with others. The key here is to test others ideas, test wether or not this protocol works for you. Questioning wether it is the right or wrong thing to do for ourselves. Notice that word, it is very individualistic and that means we should be attempting to test everything. Test what time working works for you to wakeup or go to sleep, or what actions attribute to a better quality of life. It all comes down to learning from the 100+ billion others who have already lived, and then figuring out what works for you.

We seem to have this idea that we can figure it all out ourselves, but we can't. We don't have enough time, but we do have time to test others hypothesis. This is where genius is created, then we may pick up on patterns and create a new way of doing things, a better optimized world. We publish that idea, and then we have contributed to the betterment of the world. Consider Keto diets, carnivores diets or a vegan diet, none of these are wrong for the populace, but can be wrong for the individual. The important thing is to not get swallowed up by one idea, and then shutting off the possibility that another thing can be better.

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Enticing The Self

When we go about our life, we are trying to trick ourselves into doing things that are good for us, or perhaps that are bad for us. We are building up things to either be a positive or negative force. Constantly influencing ourselves to do one thing or another, but the lack of questions is resulting in poor actions. The question that should arise is what am I building up right now?

If this single action was done a thousand times would I be happy? Ie is this the future that is desired? That is the cost of of actions, every time we entice or trick ourselves into doing something, that is what is happening. Are we building up to a future we want or simply drowning ourselves but calling it swimming? We must ask ourselves this for we can easily lack the awareness to be aware that it is happening. This is also why the question Is the current action the most important action in this moment is such a useful question. It forces us to inspect our action and decide if our time is worth using on the action. This is what we must practice and do, as the mind will continue down the path it wants, with all the old desires and new ones formed. We are failing ourselves.

What is worse is when we are on auto pilot and not even thinking about what we need to do or what we are doing. Simply being enticed to do things that we don't really want to do, but are doing anyways. This is a constant problem that we are running into. The goal is to trick yourself into doing good things, not be tricked by others (this includes advertisements) into doing things that aren't what we want our future self to be doing. It all begins in this moment, start enticing yourself to do the things you value, instead of what the world requires.

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The Void Of Nothing

Nothingness, can be seen as being in a blackhole or in the middle of space, there is nothing there but if you were there then there is something. That sorta makes the nothing have something, and even space has something where there looks like nothing. So what is nothingness?

Sometimes nothingness is what we feel, when we feel empty and not wanting to exist or do anything. That nothingness can be all consuming, and something that occurs from time to time within people, and perhaps that is normal. It may be arising because of a lack of purpose or just because of a bout of depression has hit. This may be normal, or it may be a warning sign for something worse, but the question is what can be done? Some people just allow that feeling of nothingness to swallow them, and give into it because it is easier. It is easy to succumb to the darkness or the negative because it involves no effort, others may simply observe the nothingness and explore it in an unobtrusive manner. Then their are people who simply live anyways, when they feel nothingness they still do what they need to do, because it is required. These people haven't given up, but simply are trying to make the best of a bad situation.

Nothingness doesn't decide who it targets, but the target decides what they do. It may come in waves, or it may be coming all the time, but either way you can either chip at it everyday, little by little or let it take over. Sometimes medicine helps, sometimes exercise and other times it's creating something out of nothing. Effort is required with any method. Nothingness is just the absence of you, so you it up.

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Know Thy Self

Is it even important to know yourself? Or is that just some hippy nonesense, where knowing yourself is just a waste an excuse not to live or do things?

That is the question now isn't it? Consider when you play a board game, once you know the rules the game becomes easier to follow and to win. Then you learn the secrets of the game, tricks and ways to win faster, now winning is even easier. This is because we are learning about the patterns of the board game, what typically occurs, then of course their is randomness of the cards or dice which really make the game fun, otherwise everything is fixed and we wouldn't like it. What is the difference between this and yourself? If you know your own patterns and what you do, can't you then influence yourself and get yourself to act in the appropraite manner, in which their is satisfaction?

We are a board game, though more complex because their is much randomness, and that makes things much harder to predit, but if we learn our own patterns then what? Then we know how we will react during those instances that cause the patterns to arise. That would be such a powerful tool, we can then change things to either make that pattern not arise or make that pattern arise even more frequently. That is true influence and manipulation of the self. It is extremely powerful, so is it worth knowing thy self? Yes, for the most part but is it best to dwell on such things not at all. How long will one spend trying to learn their own patterns and then avoiding living and existing? All in the name of trying to figure ourselves out, that is an excuse. Live, breathe and let go.

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Say No

Think about the last time you said yes. Did you want to say yes? Or did you feel obligated, or were you guilt tripped into doing a thing? This is very telling of a relationship, not even with someone else but with yourself. Here is something that is overlooked when we think of guilt tripping, it isn't always done by others. Sometimes it is done by the self, and this may be the worst form of guilt tripping.

We start off blaming others for guilt tripping us, but they haven't, we guilt tripped ourselves because of something in our past or perhaps something within us. This may also be because we want to be licked or we don't want to hurt another person, thus we guilt trip ourselves and we may end up blaming them for it. This isn't a them problem but a self problem. Something that should be looked at.

Of course at the end the question should be, if you say yes what do you lose? How much time is gone, or what problems could arise. These are things that aren't fun to think of, but should be thought of. It can be even a bit selfish, but it is important because it may lead you to not make a grave mistake. A mistake in the sense of taking on too much responsibility and thus end up regretting the choice. Then the cost of backing out, is high and everyone is upset. Isn't it better just to say no from the start? and thus save everyone from the pain and annoyance?

Perhaps we may want to be known as a savior, and the person that people can depend on, but at what fucken cost? Think, before wasting your breathe and leading yourself down a path of destruction.

hahahah of course there are posts in this blog/book/website that counter this very point, but alas that is the life of thinking. The push and pull of words.

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The Infinite Start

The start is important, the start is where everything begins but it means a new world has opened up and the past doesn't matter. While of course it matters, but the paths have changed, the universe has unwinded itself, and laid out new paths of brick for you, or perhaps it means bushwacking.

Starting something new, opens up all the possibilities and potential for life to get better or worse, each choice leads to that. Imagine that everything that has occurred within your life is because of many different paths that are now grayed out, therefore a single path has taken you to the moment of starting. Now this moment of starting is where all these potential branches exist, perhaps it is 4 or 4,000, it is hard to say but the branches extend so far in front that it is impossible to tell the end, but the present can be seen somewhat. This is where the possibilities exist, where anything can happen. It is the start of the infinite.

Every single choice narrows and expands potential branches of living, new paths closing and opening as if lungs expanding and compressing at every breathe. It is impossible to tell the end, but doing things and being alive causes new things to appear, new potentials. Pick wisely.

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Worthwhile Endeavour

When we think about what we are doing and whom we are becoming we must start to think further ahead. We can't simply do things willy nilly when we want to optimize or improve ourselves. We must plan for the future, and we must think of what is happening right now.

The current state of the you, is what is important to consider. Are you in the mood to conquer the world? Or just get through the day? Think. Figure out what can be done today, as we can't solve everything today, but we can start. We must consider where we want to be in the future, perhaps who we want to be and why. Perhaps we don't know, we may not know who we want to be or where we want to be in the future, then think of the things that you believe are rightous in others. What traits do you admire? Are they traits you would like to have? If so then what steps need to be taken to get there? Start.

The problem that is instantly run into is their is no magic pill, it won't be done in a day, or even a week, it may take a year or two years. No one is born perfect, no one has everything setup for them before they are 18 - ie habits, and lifestyle. It takes time, to build up, and it starts at different points in time for different people. Some people don't get their shit together until 56, some at 21 others at 33. The time doesn't matter (okay it sorta does, sooner is better than later), what truly matters is the fact that we are starting and actually progressing. Even if we don't have an end goal, just having a direction is enough to get started.

Is any habit, goal or direction worthwhile? Not at all. We must carefully consider what direction we wish to live our life in, and who we want to be. Or just think of the pros and cons of doing something then start. If we have thought of doing something for multiple years, it is probably worthwhile. It means that this thing is important to you, as it continuously comes up in your mind. That is very telling of you. It is clearly a worthwhile endeavour, yet you haven't started it. Why?

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It Just Gets Harder

When we avoid doing something, it doesn't get easier, if anything it gets harder. The more we avoid a thing, the harder it becomes. This gets worse when we are already doing something and slowly getting better, but then we stop doing it and thus end up forgetting what we did or where we were. So what happens? We have to restart or spend hours trying to figure out where we were, this is can be a huge problem.

We need to get our act together and actually work on the tasks that we need to do. We can't simply ignore something and let it continue to go by and ruin our ability to act and do. We may be increasing our anxiety about doing the task and thus increasing the activation energy required to do the task. In the end we increase the difficulty from easy to hard, or from hard to very hard, this is something we don't notice in the moment, but notice once we have avoided doing something.

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Careless Living

It is easy to be careless, doing actions without thoughts and without even considering the consequences, or getting used to the pattern of doing a task. These actions then become thoughtless, just done on repeat without looking at a checklist or thinking about the actions. This works if the actions are done correctly, but a mistake can easily occur. We can easily forget a step or mess up in some manner, but this can be corrected, but then we may forget the step again, and again. Now instead of something that can easily be corrected there is a huge problem. That is the cost of being careless.

Being careless is so easy to do, it involves the lack of thinking and that is the ideal state for most minds. We enjoy thinking of useless stuff, it holds no purpose, but it is thinking about what is important that we avoid. The tendancy to avoid thinking isn't typically a problem until it is, and that is the dangerousness of it. We can easily fall into that trap and live carelessly not realizing the consequences or noticing the effects it has on our life. Then we do notice, and then it may be too late, and that is all due to the manner in which we live. We may care, but we are careless in our actions. Then in our life. Then it may be too late.

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How Far Would I Be?

If you think about the current version of yourself how would you be if you kept working on the coding project that you wanted to start, or if you kept working out for the past two years? How far would you be? That is the question, not as if you could change the past but you can change the current circumstances, of course not immediately but over enough length of time.

This is why the question matters. IF something was important to you a year ago, and was important five years ago and is important now wouldn't that mean that you should work on the thing as if your life depended on it? Clearly it is something that is important, and that has been avoided for whatever reason. Doesn't that mean... Doesn't it? The question is why haven't you done it? Perhaps it involves a ton of effort and hardwork, and thus you wish to avoid it, but it's been 5 years and yet nothing has changed. It still sits with you, and it still bugs you, so why isn't change occurring? The matter may not be simple, but this question is. A difficult task done daily for 5 years would yield some kind of results, whether negative or positive. Then a re-adjustment could occur. Of course the thought could be like, I'm already so much older, what is the point. Think to the future, would you feel this way in a year or 5 years? Or would you think, oh fuck I should have stated this 5 years ago, 1 year ago, fuck even 10 years ago.

Starting now, is easier than starting later, and that is the thing that we seem to forget. If we start today and even do the action half assed, it may greatly help us in the future, because then future versions of ourselves will refine the process because they are apart of it. That is action in motion.

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Static Hold

When we think of the past, what do we think of? We think of the past as being done, and over with. It is solidified. We don't have to worry about the past, because it is over with, right? That is how we live our life. We build our future and present off of the past, using it as a foundation because we need a reference point, and a point that doesn't change. It is a simple, yet logical conclusion to do such.

Now what does therapy do? Typically in theray or just in simple living we unpack our past and try to decipher it to get a greater clarity of our future and a deeper understanding of the present. This is a wonderful thing to do, but it comes at a risk and for most this risk is small, but for some this risk is extremely high. Consider a person who has suffered a lot of trauma in the past, they may have built their life on the trauma and thus don't want to change anything for fear of being forced to live a different life, or their minds may have forgotten those traumas and hid them behind some walls. Now the present moment for such people doesn't involve that trauma because it is hidden. If we begin to pry at those walls and find some deep seated trauma, it may end up changing the past. Everything you know, and every memory you built on top of that initial memory will be questionsed, how can you trust yourself? It brings about the idea and the question of what is real. Our entire life can crumble because it was built on the past that has now been changed by learning new information.

This is the cost of building our future and present ontop of the past, but what else can we do? Nothing. We must build on the past, because it is all we really have. So is it worth questioning the past? Most likely, because the more we build and the less we question the more fragile everything becomes. If continuously question the past we are now making it stronger, and giving ourselves a solid foundation. Can it be broken? Of course, but at least we are open to it being wrong, we are becoming anti-fragile.

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When I was teenager I would feel lonely, or alone. When I was a young adult I also felt the same, it was a bit different but still the same. Why is loneliness a thing? It definitely has a biological component to it, as we are designed to procreate but there is something more to it. We lack a focus, a goal or simply put a direction.

Consider holding a compass, how useful is the compass if the direction that we need to walk is unknown? Or better yet what if we have no direction to go in or know what we need. We have a thing that can direct us but we don't use it, because we don't know where to go. We simply stand and wait, as if water will magically appear, or food. That is how it feels when we don't have a focus in life or just for the day. We drift about, and feel aimless. Overtime this feeling grows and makes us feel alone or lonely. We are just drifting, so of course we would feel hopeless or useless. Then the next action would be to simply giveup and be depressed or sad or lonely. We have no reason to be anything else, nothing driving us forward. Pressure makes diamonds right?

Stress can be a good thing because it means you must act, you must do something to get somewhere. We need that, it's a craving to want to find a direction and move towards it. The feeling of loneliness can't penetrate if we are busy or if we have a direction we are moving in. Perhaps it is growing a business, or maybe it is becoming great at jiu-jitsu. If we think about our ancestors they were constantly looking for food and shelter, we don't really have to worry about that, so what do we have to worry about? SOMETHING. ANYTHING. We need to worry or do something, so a focus point or a goal is super helpful as it gives us direction. Otherwise we will create a worry that won't help us in anyway loneliness, or sadness - this can of course be used as motivation to change, but more likely it will just cause us to do nothing expect wallow in our pain.

Set a focus and start moving or be pulled under by the tides of suffering, you may just end up suffering either way, but one of those sufferings will have a purpose and that may make it worth it!

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A Conversation

A conversation is one of the greatest things in the world, this here could be considered a conversation but it isn't the same. Unlike a lecture this isn't edited or perfected. It is simply written from the dome to the screen (dome meaning from the brain), yet this isn't a conversation. This post or any post is more intimate than a lecture or many YouTube videos but it is not a conversation.

When we converse with each other, we are communicating in one of the most intimate things a person can do with another. Yes, physical intimacy is nice, but it doesn't tell you about the soul of another person. A conversation is something special, it is this whole other person and their entire world elapsing beside your own, and then THEY are giving you a peak inside. A completely different perspective, with different experiences being exchanged with every single word said. That is a beautiful thing. It can be extremely precious but it can also mean nothing at all. Consider conversation with some tellers or a company. It is cold, and provides little to no intimacy, and that is worth less than a YouTube video or even a lecture.

Letters are also an intimate thing, it is a great way to learn more about a person and hear from them, what they think or feel. That is a treasure, yet most of us don't think of a conversation as intimate.

A life without conversations isn't worth living. They are needed for personal growth and for just joy and learning. We can definitely learn by observing but even that is a conversation to a certain degree. What is the point of living in a stone cave? Alone devoid of anything.

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Lone Experience

Whenever a person experiences something extreme whether it is negative or positive they believe it is impossible for others to understand and for others to have experienced such things before. This is typical because human beings are selfish, and we believe we are different than others, some may even think they are special (myself being one of those people). Most people aren't special, they haven't done anything special to be special. They are typical.

There is nothing wrong with being typical, or even slightly atypical that is apart of life, plus with 8 billion people how can anything be truly special? It's possible of course, and to say it isn't is simply foolish. Now if we consider the experiences we go through in our lives, the hardships and the pain, we sometimes feel isolated in that pain. We think that we are alone in that pain, that others can't possibly have gone through it and be functioning human beings on the other side, yet that is a weird way to look at the world. We are putting ourselves on a pedestal and then crying about it.

This is understandable because we are human, we want to wallow in our sorrow which is normal. If tell ourselves no one else could have possibly experienced this, then we are able to be unique and we can sit in our sorrow, but the hopeful or perhaps sad fact is, is that a lot of experienced what you have just experienced. The world is old, a lot of people that experienced it are long dead, and a lot of people who have experienced are still alive.

Yes an experience is singular as the lens we view the world is built by the combination of our past experiences, thus leading to the current perspective that experienced said thing. That does not mean that others haven't been through something similar, perhaps they have a stronger will than yourself, or perhaps a weaker one, it doesn't matter too much. What matters is will you learn from others, or suffer alone?

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Emotional Reality

When we experience emotions we are building the reality we live in. We are warping the world around us and shaping exactly what we see, instead of what is. Now what is, is an interesting thought. Whatever exists is being warped, it has to be as we exist and experience the world.

When we think about the world, and we think about ourselves in the world so of course we want to see the most accurate representation of the world possible... and that may be impossible. How can we pull our own perspective away from ourselves? Perhaps after meditating for a long time, and separating ourselves from the experience? Or maybe that is an illusion and we are the experience. In either case the point is that our perspective will alter what we see and how we experience things.

An optimist will experience more positive things than a pessimist, not because more good things actually happened, but because they were searching for good things. Of course, perhaps more good things did happen but that is due to the fact they were optimistic and people probably picked up on that. So if we could pick one thing to be, pick being an optimist it seems to lead to better results.

Experiences are based on perspective, and thus the emotions we feel and the manner in which we approach things and see things vastly impacts us and others. If we are confident then the world perceives us differently and the world we live in is different. If we are insecure then the world perceives us, as such and the world we live in treats us as such. We are bringing upon our own demise and our own success. It is all based on the perspective we hold and how we use our emotions.

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Run Tall One. Run.

If we think about scary things and bad things that have happened to us over the course of our lives, we may have a ton of them and we most likely walked away from them with wounds within. Wounds that exist within us rarely get repaired and addressed instead what we do is we ignore them as being nothing. We push others away, and lash out sometimes against others and sometimes against ourselves, then wonder what went wrong.

On and on we go, running away from one good thing to the next perhaps not good thing, all in the name of "I am fine". As we age, we form this pattern, this habit of avoiding our own deep troubles and attempting to address others issues thinking we are good, but we aren't. We may be so far gone to not even notice that we have issues, or problems, but once some awareness exists we can see the problem. Once we can see it, we have a choice. We can either ignore the problem or attempt to solve it. Ignoring the problem typically involves running away, and blaming others for things they didn't do.

We end up digging down instead of walking up, unsure of where we are or what we are doing, simply acting without thinking. Consider relationships, if someone has a bad relationship when they are younger, they end up with wounds and scars from it, and then carry that baggage forward. Then they enter the next relationship, still with that unpacked baggage, and this may lead them to wanting to run away, or for them to cling onto this other person. Something happens, and more baggage is added. The scars add up. Nothing is done. How can we expect to be functioning? How can we not run away, if we aren't dealing with the issues. This is the question that must be asked?

Fear can easily well up inside of us and lead us to run away, it is natural but it is bravery or courageous to stand and ask yourself why? Why is x happening? or why do I feel the urge to run away? Asking why is what children do, and that is how they learn about the world. So why not apply that to ourselves?

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The Speaker Of Dopamine

The second we tell the world we are doing something we get praise and criticism. The second we tell the world, we get a dopamine hit, and now if you are a bit crazy(such as myself), you may image the future of when you have achieved this thing you told the world you were going to do. This is fine, but then the dopamine rush comes in, and rushes over. The goal is done, all the dopamine has hit, and the motivation or even the reason for doing the thing goes away. This is what can happen when you tell the world what you are doing.

If we move in silence and work on the goal without telling the world, expect maybe a select few people, the goal is more likely to be met. We want to tell the world, we want the praise and the dopamine rush from it all, and so if we hold out on telling the world we are building the tension up. We are building up the potential dopamine hit that can occur when we reach that goal. That is what we should be aiming for.

We ruin the chance for success and a deserved dopamine hit, because we tell the world or we live in our fantasies, and thus we get the dopamine and produce nothing. As Lil Wayne said "real G's move in silence like lasagna". We want to limit the dopamine to little goals we achieve to get to our big goal. Then we can get the big dopamine hit from achieving the goal, then we can determine if we want to share it or not.

Don't kill your goal, for a simple pleasure.

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Success In Failure

When we fail, we view it as a negative thing. When we fail we also get emotional about it, and are stuck in a fog where we can't see what we successed on or what even happened or is happening. We get trapped in our minds, and thus miss out on great opportunities that are happening as the failure occurred. Maybe an innovation ot an already existing product that you were using, could change how it functions to be even better. Or perhaps it shows how there is a niche just adjacent to what was being done, and so a quick pivot can lead into that space.

The person who seeks opportunities and grabs ahold of them will be successful, they aren't stuck on the failures but are constantly looking for chances to be successful. The fog of emotions doesn't occur or of it does they go under it or over it. The goal is to find a chance, a silver lining in everything. To seek out where money or the chance to help is. This is hidden away to us when we have just failed or when we aren't used to looking for opportunity.

The goal is to constantly be looking for opportunity and every time one is found just reach out and try to grab at it. Even if that fails it builds up the mentality of looking for opportunities and reaching for them. That is the goal. That is what allows success to be frequent, because there is something within everything.

Consider when anger arises, that is an opportunity to learn something about yourself and figure out why it occurred. It is a chance to further your understanding of yourself. Just open your eyes, and your mind.

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Jealous Truth

Jealousy allows us to see the truth. It is a growing opportunity. If we are jealous, it means we seek to be that thing, and that means we can learn from that thing or that person in order to achieve what they have. Imagine reading someone's writing and being slightly jealous of what they wrote, and then examining what exactly are you jealous of, then analyzing the piece of writing to figure out how to do it. Then practicing, and BAM. You fucken did it.

Jealousy can either be an ugly thing or a beautiful one, depending on how you approach it. The opportunity to learn from it exists but most people don't approach jealousy as something that can be learned from, instead they may reprimand themselves for being jealous and really just hope it doesn't happen again, but it will. We need to constantly improve ourselves and get better, and that comes at a cost. That cost is jealousy.

Most of us don't want to hate another person, so why hate them when we can improve ourselves and be equals with them? The world is designed to teach us, and to make us better (generally), so why not lean into that? Using whatever arises as a teaching moment.

The truth is jealousy is a personal matter, one can either use it or be used by it. The choice is clear. Using it as a tool definitely requires a ton of brain power and effort, but being used by it causes the burning of bridges (though who doesn't need some light every once and while hahaha jokes).

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Things Continue To Move

Time continues to tick even when you aren't doing anything. Time does not stop, you will continue to age no matter what, relationships will continue to be built and destroyed all depending on your actions. Time continues to tick, no matter what is happening. That is both terrifying and freeing. It means change is always happening and that you can escape what is currently happening, and that other things are possible. It also means what is known now, isn't always going to be known or more accurately it may not be useful in the future.

Growth is required, not just expected. Growth is needed.

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Unseeing Truth

The thing about truth is that it can't be brushed under a rug, it can't be ignored or forgotten for long. The truth once seen can never be unseen. It festers and lives within you, forever altering the world you live in and experience. Truth isn't something to be taken lightly but it also shouldn't be ignored. It is what we should be striving towards at all times (hard to do, easy to type).

When we see the truth, we may try to drown it out but it doesn't change the fact that it is there, consider an alcoholic or someone with an addiction. The addiction could be replaced with a healthier one, but it is there because of some underlying factor, and that isn't something that can be solved by an addiction. It must be solved by becoming comfortable with the truth and to fully sit with it to understand it. That is the only way, or bury it so deep that you might as well be dead (this is not saying kill yourself).

Search the truth out, but know that once you find it, you can't unsee it. You must live with it and expose yourself to it to better understand it.

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Execution Of Action

What we want to do is execute our ideas and thoughts, but most of the time they just remain ideas and thoughts. As I am writing this, I have a bunch of ideas and thoughts but how many are acted upon? How many things can you point to and say that it is being executed upon? Less than 5? Or perhaps less than 2?

What is the point of having so many ideas if they all get sent straight to the void, only to reappear again and again, wanting to be executed but never executed. Simply given an execution every single time. If your mind was a person it would never speak to you, it wouldn't feed you ideas, because nothing is ever done or accomplished. At the end of the day execution is what matters, maybe that is creating a plan of action, or maybe that is doing the direct action. All that matters is creating movement, forward momentum that can be carried onward.

Human beings are builders, we build the reality around us and this entire world, so why wouldn't we want to build the momentum needed to continuously create action? What is the point of all your thoughts if that is all they remain, take the interesting things and the things that could benefit the world and make them reality. Time is short, and ideas are a dime a dozen (counting inflation).

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Broken Perfection

When we think of perfection, we think of how something never has to be worked on, it is perfect, never to be touched again, but what if that is an illusion? Perhaps perfection is broken?

Perfection may involve constant refinement and improvement as our own abilities grow and we get better. When we first create something, it will be ugly but it is as perfect as we are capable of making. Then with practice we get better, and then we must improve on that initial design, and thus end up creating something better. This changes the idea of perfect, because now our perfect is different. We have advanced and so is our understanding.

If everything is changing then shouldn't that include our idea of perfection, some flaws are necessary for perfection to be advancing and growing. Perhaps what perfection is, is us trying our best in whatever way possible. When a novice looks at something they may only be able to see beauty but to a master they can see the beauty but they also notice all the flaws of something. To the master it isn't perfect, or it may just be perfect because the flaws make it so.

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It is easy to allow our brains to get distracted and to allow ourselves not to do the work we know we need to do. We may simply wish to chill and not do anything, or we may trick ourselves into thinking we are actually doing work. That is the scariest part, we can easily trick ourselves into thinking we are being productive when we aren't.

Imagine planning out how you are going to clean your house or how you will clean a single room. You spent 5 to 30 minutes planning this out, when the act of cleaning could have been done within that time, and done to a point that one would be happy. Is that a good use of time? Probably not, but in the moment of planning it feels crucial, the question was never asked. Is this the most important action? Planning was just a form of procrastination, one that felt productive and supplied dopamine. It feels good to feign productivity or actions that are actually helpful.

Sometimes we just want to appear productive, and thus we end up doing things that don't help us in anyway other than making us feel somewhat productive. Is that worth it? Perhaps if one is truly in the dumps, but is it actually helpful? Not at all.

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Value Proposition

The internet has been putting this idea of adding value to others life, but most of the time we don't add value, we are simply spouting other peoples bullshit or their truth. We don't notice that we are just sputting nonesense to appease the masses.

The idea of adding value is honestly a great one, most people now add value expecting things in return, even though the idea is to give without expectation, we can't help but expect. That isn't the actual problem, the actual problem is the fact that we don't add value that is our own, or even add value that matters, we just repeat others words as if we are the ones to come up with, adding in fancy images to amplify the message. Ego driven is what we are, we are simply driving forth our own egos but stating that the value we are bringing is our own, the twitter thread we have created is our own thoughts, when really a dozen other accounts that are bigger have already said the same thing. It's just a circle jerk at the end of the day.

What matters is actually trying to help people, and sometimes that involves providing others with wisdom that is not ours, but most of the time it involves understanding the other person and seeing what value can actually be added. Or what thing have you learned personally. Though if we think about it, perhaps the repeation of other peoples words is simply because they sum up a persons experience. That those words are simply what most people experience, and thus the words are repeated.

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A Seedling

Can you look into the dirt and tell me if this seedling is growing? The others are but is this one? Are the roots expanding and taking up more space or is this seedling just a slow grower? How do we know? We can't dig it out, because then we will kill the plant. We can only see what is visible, and that is the leaves and it growing taller or having healthier leaves, once it is established we can pull it up and see the root system a bit more, but in the beginning we wouldn't dare.

So tell me reader, can you predict which seedling has a stronger root sytem and thus more potential over the long term? Probably not, and then how can we predict anothers success or failure when we can't see what their root system is doing? Of course with some investigation of their social media we can figure out if they are working on anything, but most of the time the ones that are just getting started to build themselves won't share that, as it is a private journey, and the ones who are sharing their entire lives, can sometimes paint the leaves to be green, when really they are whilting.

Perception is a killer, to truly understand you must be the person, or let them expose their root system. We can predict what is happening, but we can't know. If we had to think about it, the one that has the better root system will be able to take up more nutrients than the others, but if it never reaches the sky it may die before it ever gets sunlight. So who would you rather be? The one that is building in silence or the one that screams from rooftops without putting in the work? Take a look at the last week of your posts, or the last 6 months. See the trend? That is the life you are showing, and the way you are headed.

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Every time we feel an overwhelming state of being we can escape it, or perhaps enhance it. Feeling sad? We can drink, or we can escape into books or video games. Feeling overly happy? We can drink, or we can escape into food. Feeling depressed? We can escape into sleep or mindless smoking of weed. Escapes are everywhere. They always existed, in different forms every century but they existed.

Sometimes an escape can help us process grief or hit pause on extreme emotions, allowing us time to actually process the emotions when we aren't too attached to them. Most of the time, it isn't that. We tend to avoid the emotions because we don't want to deal with them because it is difficult. We would much rather push them away and never have to deal with them and thus we may work 80 hours a week. This doesn't really solve the problem, but if we don't have time to truly see the problem, does it still exist? The answer is yes it does, because we may not fully see it but others can.

Modern escapism tactics are different than the ones of the post, the ones now are specifically designed to provide maximum dopamine for little to no effort, and we love it. Video games offer us rewards for doing tasks that don't exist or for progressing or killing an enemy and we use that as if we are progressing and achieving things in the physical world. Now we might just be a world champion, or we may use that as destressing, then great but sometimes we use it as an escape and when we do, we don't fully enjoy the game. Instead we play it to escape and to not think.

Overall escaping every once and while isn't bad, it is the dopamine that is the problem. It is designed to keep your attention away indefinitely, to never be focused on life and to just focus on the game, or the book or the food. We then end up eating too much when we are sad or frustrated, then we end up at 100kg (220lbs)... Then we have a new problem, and how did we 'solve' the old problem? Ah yes, by eating, so that continues.

Figure out how you escape, what things you do when you are overwhelmed with emotions or when you are feeling negative emotions. Then use that as a tool to check in on yourself when doing those actions, but do not become addicted to escaping because nothing good shall come from that.

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If We Had Infinity

Imagine a world where we didn't age and time continued to tick. Yes we grow older and mature but we didn't die or really get weakened, what would that mean to us as people? The question that arises may be would we be more productive or would we waste centuries doing nothing because we have all the time in the world?

If we did have all the time in world, we may end up wasting a lot of it because that is what happens now. We end up not using our young age to go out and do things. We end up pushing things away, including responsibilities and end up wasting away. At some point during a humans life we end up realizing that we must live and do things as we are getting older and can feel it. Some of us realize this at 25, some at 37 and others at 54, but we end up realizing that life is fleeting and we should enjoy and work on things that better the world. This is such an important realization, but if we don't age.... then will we ever learn this? Will we simply drift about because it doesn't hurt us too? Thus the realization of taking on responsibility and to have fun never occurring?

A few people would realize this while still young, and then take charge of their 500 years on earth or 1000. They would start pursuing goal after goal, working on things they hate, things that excite them and so forth. They are fully living life, because they can and know that they can explore every detail that life has to offer. They may build entire multi trillion dollar companies, experiencing failure over and over and everything else. Life becomes a joy to them, and a vast exploration.

Most won't. They will end up just drifting about for a very long time, unless something forces them to realize that they should be doing things and taking on responsibility.

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Written Advice

When advice is written down, or an idea is, it neither about the reader nor about being wiser than the fellow next to you. It is about giving advice to yourself, a reminder of what is valued and what must be worked on. Advice given can also help others but it should never be given out ego, as if we know some deep secret about the universe and others can't know it.

We shouldn't be trying to make ourselves look good when giving advice to someone nor make it seem like we are above them because we aren't. We are just like them, or we were just like them. The situation of giving another person advice should be seen as giving the self advice because that is what is actually happening. We use our own basis to distort the person whom has asked for advice or whom we are giving advice to. If we realize this fact then we can use that to our advantage.

Every time we go to give advice, we can use that as a moment of self reflection. It gives us such a clear view of our motives and what we need to work on. If we watch where emphasis is placed during a sentence or what points we are repeating or expressing in a variety of ways then we can see into our own failures and letdowns and use that to guide us. Then we can use that as fuel to change and improve ourselves. That is all helping others is, simply helping yourself in a different manner.

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Reading book after book is great, we can check it off and continue on our way. We don't have to think about it, but we can post on Instagram and say something to the sum of "Read 52 Books This Year". The pride we feel is high, but the value we gained is... high?

The value we gain from reading 52 books would be high if we learned from each single book but we don't. We don't remember a lot of the things we read, but we can still post that we read them and that is all that seems to matter in the moment. If we focused on the top 4 or 5 books out of those 52 books, and just reread them and read them to fully understand them, we would get so much further and we would learn a lot. It is more useful to gain a lot from one thing, than barely having a shallow understand of many things. Well that isn't necessarily true. It depends on the person. Some people can do a lot with knowing just a little bit in various things, and make absolutely beautiful connections that can wow the world and themselves. Most don't. We can't see the truth behind everything because we haven't been deep in it.

Rereading allows new pieces of information to be gained, different aspects of the text are focused on each read through. That can allow for old information that was read first to soldify and then new informatiuon to be learned and then integrated.

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Master Craftsmanship

Mastering a craft is more than just doing a craft for a long time. It is understanding every bit and piece of the craft that allows for actions to occur that otherwise would be impossible. When someone becomes a specialist and truly understands what they are doing with their craft they can create masterpieces with ease.

It is spending large amounts of time to understand the edge cases, the things must would need to look up to find that allows for nuance to occur. It is going past the knowledge required to do something into the area of this is probably useless but I find it interesting, then realizing how important it is. It is a love for the craft that causes this deep exploration into a topic. When someone masters their craft they can make something that is super simple seem absolutely incredible and complex and they can take the complex and make it look simple and mind blowing. It is an art form unlike any other.

Masters of all different crafts end up having this bond to their craft where every action is done is with purpose, and because of this it can stem to the rest of their life, and the interactions they have with others. The tendency to find peace in the work also arises and it can be mediative. This is the true incredible feat that occurs with masters, they can relate to each other because of this meditative state they all reach doing their craft. They are completely present when doing their craft and that is meditation in action.

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Unmovable Power

When we think of power, we think of just being powerful and the ability to not be pushed around, but true power is different. It is being responsible for all, and being unbothered by little things. Focusing on the tasks at hand, and not bothering with an ant as it can't hurt you.

Consider when you are sitting in the grass, and some grass moves funny against your leg, is their panic? or worry? If so, over what? An ant or a spider? That is the lack of believing you will be alright. It shows how little you believe in yourself, worrying over a spider or an ant or perhaps a dozen ants. Worrying that you are personally being attacked. A powerful person wouldn't worry about that, because they believe in themselves completely. Nothing impacts them, they are solely focused. This could be perceived as oblivious, and that could be what is happening it depends on perspective.

Perhaps the word we are looking for is confidence not power, a confident person is powerful because they give off this aura of greatness and full belief of themselves. It isn't relying on strength or intelligence but this belief in themselves that is unshakable, that is why people rally behind them. They aren't worried about the grass or ants, what they are focused is on simply resting or enjoying the weather

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Achievement Hunter

In gaming there is a saying for those that want all the achievements in every single game, and they are called achievement hunters. They find the obsecure and difficult achievements and obtain them. Then they hunt for the next one, and then the one after that. The hunt doesn't stop. In life there are people whom live for achievements and gaining prestige. They seek awards and medals from society, they are looking to gain as many achievements as possible, because each achievement they obtain gives them a hit of dopamine. That hit of dopamine is then craved by individuals and they become real life achievement hunters.

Achievement hunting is great and can be super rewarding but because it can be super rewarding it can become addicting. Instead of experiencing life, we hunt achievements and trophies to fill a empty house, for the neighbors that never come over because who has time for that. The craving for dopamine grows over time, as each achievement builds a faster flywheel, speeding it up. Until we break, because no rest was taken and only the pursuit of the achievements is chased.

Now the flip side is those who aren't motivated by achievemments, they don't seek them or seek anything really. These people have the problem of never experiencing the dopamine hit from achieving something, from putting in the hard work and getting to a destination. They lack ambition. That in itself is a huge problem, because they chase other forms of validation, that don't come with any trophies or anything. That is a problem for the individuals in this camp. They need to start building their flywheel, by achieving things. If they aren't motivated by achievements, perhaps they are motivated by other things? If that is the case then one should explore that, and figure out what drives them. Then ask the question, why isn't x driving me? Exploring the self, and then trying to do little things to get that feeling of achievement and success. The flywheel will start to flutter, and then we can push down and go a bit faster, working on a little bit harder achievements, to get those dopamine hits and to build the pattern of achievement = dopamine.

In the end both extremes have their problems, and this isn't something that can be prescribed but something an indivual needs to explore, and learn from themselves. Explore and learn. Grow.

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Incremental Improvement

People mention that doing consistent works leads to incremental improvement that actually changes a persons life, but we rarely notice incremental improvement, or we may simply be going through the motions.

The problem that we as people run into is that we don't pay enough attention to the details. We focus on the big actions of simply going through the motions, the previous post was such an action. It was written, and it isn't a bad post but it has no spirit. It was simply written to mark off some invisible checkmark. It holds no value, but it was written and thus it shall remain. That post won't lead to improvement, because it was not written with intention.

That seems to be the thing most people struggle with, it is being concious and fully present during their practice. If we want to improve our writing, the writing must be done. We must start breaking it apart, and really looking at where it could be improved and what is actually wrong with it. Instead of simply writing day in and day out. Writing daily will help you improve incrementally until you hit a plateau, then improvement in such a mindless manner will not be possible. It is like working out, one can get relatively fit by simply doing basic compound movements and stretching but for real results we must include diet, we must look at the exercises and the things that are being done. It isn't just about showing up and doing the bare minimum. It is about looking all the tiny details and practicing them. Slowly forging the skill and the ability. This is incremental improvement in action.

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Ticking Clock

No matter what is decided time will continue to tick by, no matter what is done time will continue to tick by. That is the blessing and curse of time, it continues to move forward no matter what is happening. If something bad is happening, it will pass, if something good is happening, it too shall pass. That is the curse and blessing of time.

The thing that is forgotten is the fact that we can decide where we spend our time, what we do and whom we do things with. Sometimes we may feel like we have no choice, but that is simply because we have made our choice but wish we had the guts to make the choice we really want. When we decide to sleep all day, that is a day gone. When we decide to workout all day, that is a day gone. When we decide to work on a project, another day is gone. Time doesn't stop for anyone or anything, expect perhaps Dr. Strange. That is the thing we can easily forget, we believe at the age we are that we have plenty of time, but we really don't. Yes we have time, many years perhaps we are 20 or we are 45 both people have plenty of time, but the important thing is to know time is ticking by. We must recognize that time is passing by and that we must act, and live life otherwise the clock will run out and we won't have a chance to live our life.

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Dear Me

Dear Me, I have been trying to figure out how to motivate you, because I want a better life. This has been something I've thought of for a long time, but never really written down. I want to look back at you and be proud, and I want you to reap the beautiful benefits of accomplishments. The easy answer to this might be oh do x/y/z but you already know that, but you lack the motivation to do them. You know the power of meditation, of working out, of writing and of staying focused or working on a project to completion. So how are we going to do this buddy?

Perhaps we should begin with what already motivates you, food. You think about what you are going to have a few days in advance and crave the deliciousness that is food, that is something you love. Making the dish yourself no matter if it takes 5 minutes or 3 hours, the task will be completed. So why is that? Perhaps is it because you know it won't be a failure? Or the fact that the dopamine hit is guaranteed? Whereas when it comes to personal projects, the rate of failure is so high and the fact that you haven't experienced many amazing things so that link between accomplishments and dopamine doesn't exist? Even if the dish isn't great or is a failure it's okay because you made it. Fully and completely.

If that is the case then how can we get you to be motivated and to get accomplishments, turning it into food. Is that you need mini accomplishments or dopamine hits in order to get that flywheel flying? Or is that there is a fear of trying because you may lose some of the fun things you already like? Such as videogames or food or reading fiction? Is change what you are scared of? If it is good or bad, it may lead to a different life. Isn't that the point of life though, to live - experiencing change and everything else.

Consider videogames, you play them to avoid super emotions and as form of escape from the world around you. Why do videogames get such high priority? They offer dopamine, every single kill is rewarding, it is beating someone else. They are neither quick nor easy. The risk of failure isn't very high, and they are extremely engaging. Could it be that you broke what makes you high? For example you don't feel accomplished or dopamine from doing hard things or living because you have been so hyped up on videogame highs? Did you break yourself? So what if you took a break from videogames for a month, or two weeks - what would happen?

Now from the looks of it motivation isn't arising for these various activities that I want you to do because the incentive structure isn't there. The pattern hasn't been experienced enough times to bring forth the desire to achieve anything. Their also could be broken dopamine within you, where you are so used to getting so much high level of engagement from videogames, and reading (fiction) and from all the flavour receptors in your mouth that the average existence just seems boring. So in the end even when you accomplish something, ie writing for an entire year or writing over 100,000 words felt good but it didn't feel huge. Building this website didn't feel anything. Though there does seem to be incentive when you land a large client.

When you land a $5000 client their is excitement and the sense of feeling accomplished or even landing a $2000 client, so why is that you aren't chasing that? Perhaps the lack of feeling like you deserve that, or better yet you know what you are doing. Formal training wasn't given, you just learned from experience and from the internet but in incomplete ways. Perhaps that lack of confidence also leads to a lack of motivation. That means that confidence needs to built up on the things that are already known.

What may be needed is a reset period, holy shit I just googled how long it takes dopamine transporters levels to return to normal.... 14 months. Holy shit. Ya just might be fucked, might as well start now.

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Day To Life

Day to day, things don't matter. The day to day drama is useless, it doesn't mean anything. The time you did one work out on a Sunday, meaningless. The time you did crack cocaine, or drank that one beer is meaningless for the most part to ones life. The one off events rarely influence life. If one day you met the love of your life, then that completely impacts your life, or if you ended up doing heroine and became addicted. That can completely alter your life, but most things that are done once, are fairly meaningless.

The thing that brings the most value, is doing things for many days. The things we do everyday is what builds our life. So it really is Day To Life. We end up doing the same things everyday based upon default, we wakeup, flip open our phones, or just hit a button and turn them on, then we scroll, or we may hit snooze for an hour, then begin our day. Our day consists almost exactly of things from the day before, not by choice but by design. We built our habits and our patterns and we simply stick to them, it is how we end up with time sinks - see previous post Time Sink. That should be both terrifying and liberating, we can alter our life, albeit difficult, and change the direction we are heading.

We just need to build up the changes over time, and make them last a life time. Easy to type, much harder to do. This seems to be a reoccurring topic on Thoughts Of Contemplation, how to change our life for the better. Being on autopilot is great when the plane is flying where it needs to go, but being on autopilot when we aren't heading in a direction we desire or that is sustainable is extremely dangerous.

The problem that occurs for most people is not knowing where the time went, and this is where time tracking can be so helpful. Then you know what activities are taking up the most amount of time, or where time is being lost. That is super helpful, in designing ones life, but to design a life one must have discipline. So build that, as it is required to hold down and build up a new habit.

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Time Sink

The beauty of Steam (which is a videogame buying site type thing), is that it tracks how much time someone spent playing a particular game. It tracks when you bought it, and when the last time you played is. All the data if available for the user, and the thing that is wonderful about this is that it is possible to see how much time was sunk into a game, and what was gotten out of it.

Was a game played for 200 hours? Was it with friends? Or just by yourself? If it was with friends, was it worth it? If it was alone was it worth it? 200 hours is roughly 8 and half days. 8 and half days. That is a ton of playtime, now imagine if that was spent learning to code? Or building a business, you could probably end up learning something amazing with that amount of time. Now what about 1,000 hours? Most people who play videogames regularly have at least 1 game with over 1,000 hours into it. Imagine how far along a person could be in a new skill or anything, if they spent 1,000 hours into it.

The thing to remember is, was it worth it? Maybe the 1,000 hours that were spent on a game was worth it for the 14 year old, or maybe it was worth it for the 35 year old because they experienced a whole new world with their friends. Or alone. Most people would say a 1,000 hours playing a video game isn't worth it, but that is a matter of perspective. All people would agree that it is a time sink.

Having the ability to see where time went is beautiful, we can then discern our behaviors and where we will be in the future based upon the past data. That is useful, but the important thing is to look back and think about if a time sink was actually worth it. Do you remember the 500 hours of fun? Or was it perhaps only 10 hours of fun, and 490 hours of hating the game/task but doing it because it was something to do.

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Everyone is trying to sell you things, this blog is trying to sell you things (though tbh it is trying to sell things to me). What most people are trying to sell you is an ideology, or a set of thoughts. This isn't done out meanness, but out of the belief that they are right. Sometimes it isn't even done because of that, it is just words being spoken or typed for the sake of being typed. This is where we must be curious as to what we are doing.

Questions should arise as to why we are talking to a certain person, or why are they saying the words they are saying. More importantly the question should this persons words appear in my timeline, or in my life. Some people will build you up, others will tear you down. But the words are spoken all the same, and we hear them. That is the problem and solution, we hear them (yes, we can also read them).

Being selective over whose words we want to put weight behind is important, some friends are great for goofing off with, other friends are great for having deep conversations. The goof off friend may not be the person that should be gone to for a deep conversation, and thus their opinion on such matters does not hold weight. Othertimes that friend may be able to be both people, but the important thing is being selective of whom you are allowing access to your mind to.

The tweets one sees on a daily basis can warp the sense of self into something else. They alter our thoughts and the background noise of our life, our mind. Being selective about such things allows us to better form ourselves. Influencing ourselves by using other people. Every single person is trying to sell you something, the choice is yours wether you want to sold or not. Reject it, or you'll end up accepting it.

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Current Action

When we think of the current action that we are doing, we may judge it as important based upon it being on our tasklist, or we simply be acting without thinking, simply going through the motions of life; in either scenerio we aren't questioning the right question.

When we are doing a task or working on a project we may simply work on it till it's completion without questioning if the current action is the most important action. We may have 2 to 5 side projects or things we are doing but which one takes priority? If we build a list that is organized based on importance, then we have something static. This is better than nothing, but it is also useless. The thing we should trying to have is a dynamic list, where priority shifts based upon the question "Is this the most important action?".

A project may start off as important but once you get to a certain point, it may not be the most important project. This is why questioning the current action being done is super important. It allows us to have a deeper understanding of what is actually happening. Now sometimes the answer isn't clear, and when it isn't clear we can either take time to clear it up or we can proceed aheaed without trying to decipher which action is the most important. Proceeding ahead is essential because we shouldn't waste 5 minutes trying to decide if brushing our teeth is more important than taking a shit. The order of these doesn't matter, just do em.

At the end of the day, questioning if the current action is the most important will allow for our mental list to not remain static, and instead dynamic and responsive to what is occurring.

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Complex Living

Living is a complex endeavor, we as human beings are complicated. This complication is somewhat self-inflicted, but also isn't. The day we were born, the complicatedness starts to build up and the first and usually the biggest impact is our family. Having a great family life is rare, most of us have fucked up families or at least partially fucked up. We never really question it, and simply react to it and don't notice what is actually wrong.

Over the years family problems deeply entrench themselves into our lives, and into our psyche influencing our daily decisions and our life actions. How we end up reacting to problems or conflict, and what our manner of caring for others is. The influence of family is massive, it complicates everything. This is why it is so important to really break apart and understand ourselves. The biggest thing being breaking apart relationships that existed in the past, and that were extremely important to us when we were younger, this goes from dating to friendships and of course family.

The course of our life is shaped by those we spend the most time around, so figuring out ourselves and the manner in which we live our life is wise. As then we can influence ourselves in a positive direction. Building upon ourselves over time.

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The Cost Of Bad

We have a method of living where we can start to say "do the right thing", but does that mean killing millions is something that needs to be done in order to "do the right thing"? We can justify all types of wrong in order to get to doing the right thing. Wars have been fought, horrendous things have been done, all in the name of doing the right thing. It is easy to do evil when we evoke the idea of doing it for the greater good.

This is the general logic that is used by people, but it isn't about doing the right thing. It is more about not doing the wrong thing. If we can decrease the number of wrong, or evil things done then that will lead to a greater increase in positive things. When we attempt to do no evil, we aren't going to be killing millions to do one good dead, we will be trying to prevent that. Our whole mindset shifts to simply not doing bad things or things that bring down the world. This is a different mindset, and some may say a negative mindset but it leads to greater positive outcomes.

The thing that needs to be remembered is that it is easier to prevent catastrophe than to stop it midway through, this is why when temporary laws are passed or ideas are put in place, they end up being permanent. We simply just get stuck with the thing, because it is harder to undo than it is to do. Limiting bad actions leads to less thinking about consequences, and more so just thinking does this lead to a negative outcome? If yes, say no.

I let myself get distracted, and thus the post went in a different direction as the train of thought shifted.

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Shifting Clouds

The weather can shift within hours, from a sunny day to a rainy day or from a miserable day to a good day. This happens extremely quickly, and the second we put off something we have left it up to fate, or up the gods. We have said we don't care, and that the world will continue to stay stagnant until we are ready to do the thing. The world isn't a videogame, so it doesn't pause. The weather changes, and the clouds come in and things get busy.

When we have the chance or get the idea to do something and we have time NOW, the best thing to do is to do the task, the second we put it aside the clouds may come in and the rain may start pouring. Consider the last time you wanted to go on a walk, was the weather good? Then did you go? Or did you say "later" and the weather turned and now an excuse is available. The world will continue to tick away, wether we like it or not, the only thing we can do is act on the things we want to do when we get the feeling of doing it. Nothing is stopping us expect ourselves.

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5 mins here, 5 mins there

A persons living quarters are essential, how messy they are may indicate their mental state, or how busy they are, or perhaps it really means how lazy they are. There are a ton of plausible explanations for why a persons living quarters are messy, but the biggest and most important one is, is that what they want?

When we consider any task, or anything we want to do in life, it is rarely 24 hours of straight work. It is more about the 5 minutes we spend on a task, such as cleaning our desk at the end of the day, or putting everything back in the right spot in the kitchen. These tasks take less than 5 minutes and they lead to a cleaner home or work station, not because we spent an hour cleaning, but we spent 5 minutes everyday maintaining a clean and organized place. It isn't the one off things we do that matter, it is the work we put on in a nearly daily basis.

If we want to learn something, it isn't about studying once a week for 10 hours, but the 2 hours we put in for 5 days, or the single hour we put in everyday. The consistency makes the effort last over time. It is also easier to put in 2 hours than it is 10, the biggest problem that is faced is the wanting to quit everyday, or perhaps put things off. We like to trick ourselves into believing that we want to do the 10 hours on a single day, than the 2 hours daily, or that we will clean tomorrow, then tomorrow comes... No cleaning gets done, then a week passes by and the work station is a mess, and we need to take 40 minutes to clean it, out of an already busy schedule.

All it takes is 5 minutes here, 5 minutes there.

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Consider Cleaning Glasses

When smudges appear on glasses, or on screens we become a little annoyed at them because they ruin our viewing experience. Then a few minutes pass and we forget about them, then some more dirt and smudeges appear, perhaps some dust and we don't think anything of it. Our viewing experience has gotten worse, but we still assume it is good, and that we can see everything perfectly. We can't, but we don't know it. Someone may offer you a microfiber cloth to clean your glasses, or perhaps you finally decide to clean them, then you notice how dirty they are. Then you clean them. The world is completely different, you realize how bright everything is, and how crystal clear everything appears to be. Nothing changed, really but now you can see everything clear as day. The idea of how did I ever live with the dirt and the smudges appears.

Think about the life you lead, and the things you simply don't notice. Once you start cleaning them, or fixing some problems life instantly gets better, it's like magic. We then can easily notice the bad, and we realize how did this ever happen. It was so clearly toxic, this is also noticable with bad relationships. How did we ever not notice how bad it was for us? This is the same idea as cleaning glasses. We don't know, until we know then we really know.

The understanding of what is occurring and what it means to actually see occurs and we can't go back, but most people end up back where they started, because it is easy to forget about cleaning some glasses.

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Perspectives R Us

When we think about who we are, we can call ourselves artists, or programmers, or even writers but these words are simply based upon our perspectives. The world around us is just that, our perspective. We don't actually see the world for what it is, but we see the world through the lens of our life experience. So what are we? Simply our perspective, nothing more.

It is easy to say we are something more than our perspective and it is easy to trick ourselves into believing anything, but the biggest thing is that all of this is still based on our perspective. Everything that exists is warped by our perspective, whether this is a good thing or a bad thing is determined by us, and more so by our perspective. So even thinking of whether something is right or wrong is tainted by our perspective. Everything we know is.

Now to fight perspective may not be the best thing to do, because that is all we are, but the thing we can do is gather various methods of accessing different perspectives, because then even if we are warping the world to our perspective, we can change our perspective and thus change the world. Consider a positive person, or someone that sees the good in everything, they typically live a happy life - most things work out for them. This isn't because good things keep happening to them, it is more so that they are simply warping the world to be good, and so things seem good to them. A pessimistic person, sees the bad in everything or the negative. So their world experience lies in the negative, not because the world is bad but because that is what they choose to see. This is all perspective. Nothing is set in stone, not even ourselves.

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Distraction Free Living

Sometimes we aren't distracted because to be distracted one needs to be focused. Distractions are pulling us away from focus, but if we are never focused we aren't distracted as we haven't even begun. This is a difference that is important to note. We don't need to train ourselves not to get distracted, we need to train ourselves to start getting focused. Once we have begun to start getting focused then we can worry about distractions.

The thinking people have is to put the cart before the horse, but without the horse we can't utilize the cart. If we simply have the horse and no cart, that is fine because a horse can carry more than us, that is still a net positive! That makes it worthwhile. When we just have the cart then we don't really have anything expect some lumber, as we can't pull the cart ourselves. This is how we should approach things, we don't need to fully optimize things to get started, we simply need to get started then optimize things. Once we start we can figure out what are our distractions, which ones are the biggest problem, is it Twitter or Email?

It isn't distractions that are our problems as currently you are living in a distraction free world, it is the inability to start and to first be focused that is the problem. The distractions are simply secondary to the true problem. Solve that, then work on distractions.

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Chasing New

A new country invokes a new way of looking at the world, it feels fresh as if we are babies looking at the world. Everything is magical. We lose all of our logic that we applied to our own country and now exist within the realm of not knowing. This leads to people actually seeing and witnessing the world for what it is, and not what we perceive it to be. The feeling of fresh eyes, where everything is new fades quickly, so we jump to a new country, and then another.

We can easily begin to chase this experience of "fresh eyes", and forget that this is possible where we live. The problem isn't in the country or the people, but within ourselves. We forget to actual look, to strip away our judgments of the world and our understanding of the world and experience it for it is. We end up experiencing our own perspective, our own mind instead of experiencing what is happening in front of us, and a new country helps to pull us away from that. We can't speak the language, we don't understand the customs so we have to really SEE what is happening around us. We begin to be mindless, and more into the present moment. If anything, we are forced into the present moment.

The goal is to have fresh eyes in every moment, though one could argue this is overwhelming and it is to an extent, but it is super helpful in terms of actually experiencing the world. Fresh eyes stops us from thinking about everything we know, and using old lens to shape our world, and instead we just see the world for what it is. The actions, the beauty and the ugliness. Everything is witnessed, with minimum biases.

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Gaming Life

The thought of life being a game has most likely crossed everyone's mind, and for good reason. We don't know where it will end or what the true consequences of anything is. Some people of said that our universe may be a simulation, and that is completely possible. We really don't have a deep understanding of the world we live in, or the people around us (including ourselves).

If we treat life as a game, does anything matter? Not really, but consider how you or anyone plays a game. We want to win, we create strategies and attempt to figure out ways to win, whatever game we are playing. We are calculating ways to win, so isn't life like that? So it does have meaning, but only the meaning we attach to it. If we play chess, we may simply be wanting to learn and improve our game, so we don't care about winning, or we could be trying to win and thus completely focused and stressed. The game is the same either way but the experience of it is completely different.

Some people live life in a joyful manner, treating everything as a joke and others live life as seriously as possible, chasing one goal then the next. Both are valid ways to play the game, but both yield completely different results and most likely different endings. The idea of life being a game, isn't far fetched, it really is one. Each player plays it a completely different way, but some people try to go with the meta, ie go to school, then university, get a job, get married, and have kids. As time continues the meta changes. Consider 10,000 years ago, the meta wasn't what it is now, it was about surviving. The goal was to be strong enough to kill others, now that is greatly frowned upon (killing others). The meta changes, as society changes and that is to be expected.

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Continuos Living

Life is typically broken into discrete segments this is done by separating everything from one another. It makes sense to do so, calling a table, a white table allows it to be described to someone other than you. The self completely understands everything without words, words simply break things into big and tiny chunks. We use them to solidify the discrete nature of living. We can't simply say everything is the same, because then how can we describe something? Or to teach another?

The logical way of thinking about everything being the same is based upon atoms. Everything is made up atoms and so everything is the same. Of course we could break it down into simply saying electrons and protons. The base is the same, just different combinations, and that is only what we know so far. We may be missing a ton of things. If we view things as the same, then when we lash out against someone or something like a foam pad, it is like we are lashing out to ourselves. That sorta has a comical effect. The effect of everything being the same is that everything impacts you, as we are selfish so we don't wish to hurt ourselves, and when we hurt others that is exactly what we are doing.

Another way to look at it, is the helping aspect the more we help others the better we feel, the more we help ourself. Of course this is if everything is the same, then what about good or bad decisions? Are they even a thing? They would, because they aren't physical, good and bad are simply words with assigned values, they don't really exist. We can't judge if something is good or bad because things have a butterfly effect, so it won't help us.

Alas sameness is a complex topic, because when we eat food we are eating ourselves. This is perhaps why some cultures and aboriginal tribes greatly respect the aspect of killing and eating. It is important and valuable to treat the thing that is being eaten with respect, because of sameness or perhaps it is because we know we will die and we wish to be treated well.

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Fear Of Improvement

The idea of improving is always posted in a positive light, as if improvement is always positive. What if one improves and life gets worse, or one ends up alone? Not alone presa, but stuck with the feeling of being alone. Would that be worth improving for? This could easily be fear of something that will never happen stopping one from getting better, or it could be a legit concern. Another thing that may arise is the idea of improving impacting life, is the act of improving changing the life we are leading - ie as if it is free will?

If we take the idea of not having free will, and how improving can destroy the idea of not having free will then what about all the times one has failed to improve? Was that a choice or did it just happen? So if one is successful in improving then it is the same idea, was it really a choice? Or did it just happen. Improvement is something happens, do we question degradation of the self, or do we simply accept it as if it was meant to happen. There is a lot of questions, but that leads to a curiosity and wonder about the world, leads to new answers. Seeking to improve and get better, is a sign of a healthy mind because that is all human beings have been trying to do since they have existed. How do you think we got the iPhone?

Losing everyone around you implies they did not wish to see you successful or happy, so isn't that a good thing to lose? We will meet new people and grow with them, they may happen to wish for your success. Isn't that a happy endeavor? Definitely scary because it involves entering the unknown, and that is terrifying. Our life will improve, most likely but that is scary because we don't know how. We know our life now, and life now has it's bad parts but overall it's alright. So why not stick with it?

Sticking with it, is simply bringing upon a slow death. Self loathing starts to occur, and then the soul degrades, all because of the selfish(?) action of wanting things to stay the same. This is the worst fate a human being can experience, and it is a shame. Growth is the nature of a human and improvement is seeking something greater, giving the world permission to achieve it as well.

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History Rewinded

History is repeating itself every second, not just for your own life but for every life everywhere. The reason why history books are so useful is that human beings as a whole haven't changed much in the past 1000+ years, easy our rules may have, or we may be more culturally evolved but we are still the same within. History books or dairies such as "Meditations" or "The Histories" both us life, and we can relate to it. People are still the same, the ideas still apply and who we are hasn't changed much.

LIfe is not so different from the past, so using the past to learn is probably a clever way to learn. Their problems are our problems, and so the solutions or ideas they provide can actually help us. They give us a window into a simpler time, where we would hope the solutions that were applied still apply today - for the most part they still do. So why not learn from someone who has been teaching others for hundreds of years or perhaps even dozens. Books that are popular for so long normally contain a popularity about them that can be annoying, because if everyone likes this thing then it must be terrible.

Using the past is the quickest way to knowledge and learning. The past has already happened, and yes the future will be different when compared to hte past, but the person who gains information from past can manipulate that information and apply it to the present and thus truly give us a gift of the present moment.

Some may have the belief that history from the past is obsolete, and it may be but some of the tactics can be altered and used in the modern world. The key is that we must actually apply ourselves and alter the information's we gain so that it is applicable to now. Remembering that people haven't changed all that much, we can learn a lot from the actions of the past, to gain influence over our present.

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Revealing Relations

It is easy to make the assumption that being alone sucks, that a relationship will solve all the problems. That when we are dating someone that the problems we have would go away, but that isn't the case. A relationship amplifies the good and the bad in our life, it shows us our faults and the scars from the past. The assumption that life magically gets better when we are not alone is ludicrous, yes in the beginning one can hide in the honeymoon period, but what about after that?

As things progress more and more of the problems that were occurring when alone start to bubble up, perhaps that is depression, or a lack of confidence or perhaps it is societal norms applying pressure. It can be hard to say but it does happen. We can't hide away from what was, in what is, especially if we haven't properly dealt with our past or dealt with the problems that were arising in our life. A relationship will amplify what was, both good and bad and the thing that is useful is that now your partner and yourself can work on it together but the burden of work is still placed on the individual. Some people are better when in a relationship, but that should never be the defining quality of a person.

Most young people jump from relationship to relationship, hoping to escape their past and the pain they are feeling, yet they can't. They may begin to pick bad partners for themselves. The jumping from relationship to relationship is what causes previous problems to continue to arise and the failure of the relationship. The lack of time spent being alone leads to no issues being resolved, all issues are simply shoved down until the next relationship then that blows up, and the pattern continues. A relationship can reveal so much of ones nature and the problems that one is facing, because it can be easy to blame the other person or to run away, and that is when the problems are clearest, at least for those who are looking.

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When we start new things we may get the sense that we aren't good, or that we don't deserve to continue because we aren't x. This feeling of being an imposter after even doing something for a few years can lead to one feeling they aren't good enough and as if they are a fraud. Some would say that this feeling only happens with those who are starting to get good and this is perhaps the world testing them, but if it isn't? What if it actually is us being bad at the thing and that feeling of us not being deserving of whatever it is, is true? Then what? Does that mean we should simply quit and find something else to do, or does that mean we should work harder to achieve our dreams.

This is something that is hard to really figure out, the biggest thing is that we need to be aware of our patterns, to recognize the various feelings that are arising and the reasons they could be arising. We could simply not be working hard enough, thus the solution is working hard and learning more. Or it could be that we are simply getting to the point where the world is trying to weed us out? The point where those who would quit, quit and those who continue to strive and to grow keep going?

The feeling of being an imposter is sort of a turning point for a person who is delving into a craft, it is the world testing if we are strong enough, or if we are actually not worthy.

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We need to start realizing that learning a little bit, is enough to get the ball rolling to learning a lot. The goal is to trick the mind into wanting to learn, and then making it crave learning. That in itself is a great reward mechanism, instead of doing x (bad/alright) thing, we can be learning and growing. Enjoying the fruits of our labour, and then amplifying those fruits into an entire orchard. That is powerful. It all begins with getting over that first hump. Then we can begin to build on things, the height of the future humps doesn't decrease but the amount of effort required decreases as we have momentum on our side. That is what really gets the compounding going. The more we do, the easier doing becomes, and thus the more we wish to do.

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A World Full Of Potential

The world is so insanely vast and filled with a mired of people that we can easily get lost in it. We can forget that wonderfulness is just around the corner, that there is magic everywhere, or at least the potential for it. The problem is that we can't accept that, because it means life can only ever get more richer and fuller. This means our problems aren't really problems, and that they are fairly insignificant - not all problems but most of em. When we look at person, we can see them for who we think they are, but we can sometimes fail to see who they can become and the power they hold as people.

The power that people hold is vast, because every single person has the potential for greatness. Every single person has the potential to grow. Some people are closer to greatness than others, and others have put in a ton of work to get closer to greatness ie their full potential. Once we can see that people have potential we can apply that to ourselves. This can be both devastating and extremely powerful, it is devastating because it is powerful. The entire world now rests on our shoulders, we can do anything, be anything, achieve anything. What is the requirement? Focus and effort. Talent helps, but it can't replace effort. Potential allows the mind to explore, expanding and pushing to the edges of what is currently possible, because knowing that one will be fine or that the thing can be reached is all that is needed.

The world is ripe with potential, and it pushes against us all the time. We close our eyes to the world, and we miss it all. All the potential is gone, even your own. The second we begin to open our eyes and observe the world as if we were a fly on the wall, we can see the growth and the potential of the things and people around us. That can easily put a smile on a persons face. It is absolutely wonderful.

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The Windowless Soul

If we think about the world and how we fit in it, sometimes we believe we are more right than others. We get on our high horse, thinking that we are walking beside everyone else, yet we think we are more right. We may be, but does that matter? This is all about the ego, most attempt to remove the ego completely then boast about not having an ego - isn't that funny? Perhaps the goal isn't to remove the ego, but to watch the ego and live in harmony with it.

The ego is like a light in a dark room, if it is too bright and too big then we can't see anything. If we have a bit of ego and just watch it and see what is happening, we can enjoy the light that it can provide. It is something that will sometimes get bigger, sometimes get smaller, the goal isn't to remove the ego but to live with it and try to understand it.

When anything happens in life, we must approach it with the attempt to understand it and not to push it away or trying to crush it. Both of these actions can cause pain, and simply unnecessary worry and hardship. Life is hard enough, so why do we add to it? We seek to remove the ego, to remove suffering and desire, but without any suffering at all life is just meh. Suffering is apart of it all, just like the ego. With no ego, perhaps there will be no light within the soul, thus no light in the eyes.

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Flywheel Of Success

Jordan Peterson has this idea that when someone is successful in part of their life, they will be more likely to be successful in other parts of life, similar to a flywheel of success. When we taste success we want more, then we strive for it even harder and the world helps those that are going up continue to go up and it helps those who are going down continue to go down. The idea is solid if you think about it, random successes or lucky chances can of course happen but don't impact the general flywheel. If success breeds(I really wanted to write breads) success then shouldn't we strive for success every chance we get? Or try to build it in our own life so we can apply it to other things?

This all sits on the stilts of a flywheel, but that is what we should be trying to do with our lives. We need to be building upon the past, and have the past build up the future on it's own. Who wants to work at something, then stop and lose all that momentum? Then the gears need to be restarted and the effort needs to be reapplied all from scratch. If we continue things glide smoothly, so why wouldn't this apply to success. Every layer of success reduces the friction of the next pass, until there is no choice but to be successful.

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Grasping Opportunity

When we think about opportunities that arise in our life, we think about the positive potential of them. We think of how far or high they can take us and what they provide for us. If we miss some, we then are left with some sense of regret and of longing, as if the entire world has collapsed in front of us. In a manner of speaking it has.

Missing an opportunity when presented or when we simply ignore an opportunity there can be regret but more so we have lost something far more precious than just that single opportunity. We have given up on future opportunities as well, and that is the true cost of ignoring an opportunity. When we choose to ignore an opportunity or let it pass we are rejecting a gift from the world. Telling everyone that we don't need this, but then why would any opportunity be presented to you ever again? It is easy to ignore or reject an opportunity, we get them all the time and it's simple to say "we are busy" or "it isn't for us". It is comfortable not to take on the challenges or simply to stay home. Consider when someone provided you a simple opportunity such as going on a hike or perhaps a potential business deal. Did you strive towards it? Or shy away? Then consider the next time that person wants to provide one of those opportunities would they select you or select someone else who is more likely to say yes? The answer is fairly simple.

An opportunity can sometimes feel like a burden or even a challenge but that is apart of the process. It is important to strive towards it and accept it. When good things happen double down, when bad things happen ease off. Use momentum to your advantage and don't shy away from taking a risk, if the downside is limited. Opportunities arise all the time, but do you see them? Do you ignore them?

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The 24/7 News Cycle

The news is continuously going, now, now, now now nownownow... It just keeps on going, and to stay informed a person needs to become a computer as most 'news' is garbage and has no sense of purpose. The same could be said about Twitter. People go into outrage, and become upset or fixated on things extremely easily because it provides a sense of purpose, of importance. The news can also be used as a signal to others of how one is cultured, but the opposite can also be true! We can never watch the news nor read it and think we are above the masses, yet we are on twitter arguing about something else or 'standing up' for someone. Consumed by garbage to provide a sense of meaning to the life we lead, when we have nothing going on in our world, we try to find things outside of ourselves.

There will always be something out there, but most somethings aren't actually anything but dust. We don't look into those things or even consider them fully, but we have an opinion and we have the internet, we are important. The news is just like us, sharing crazy things in order to get clicks and views and to seem important. That is important to note, we tell lies based on clickbait titles, because we also want clicks and titles, we don't care to be informed or to know anything. We want to appear as if we know things and what better way to do that than to simply read the headline and create an opinion, sharing it for the world to hear - of course on a moral high horse.

This is the problem with us. We seek fulfillment in the strangest of ways, and we think we don't. This is why observing ourselves and how we act is super important. We can learn from it, and we can see that the person next to us is not so different than ourselves.

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A Thousand Lives

Reading allows us to explore a whole new world, to make connections to things we would otherwise not see and allowing us to open up our world view or change our point of reference. Reading is beautiful whether it is non-fiction or fiction. Yet so few of us do it, or at least do it consistently. This could be because it isn't as stimulating as an action packed movie, which requires no effort to follow and is just fun, nor is it like building something with your hands.

Reading is building something though, it is building up new ways of thinking or helping define old ways of thinking. It requires effort, and requires patience. If anything reading is a great teacher. To absorb the information we are reading, we must understand it and for most of us to understand it, we must go slow and really think about what is happening. This is not something that is taught very well in school, there you slog through problems or are being spoonfed information that you didn't pick to learn. When reading you can pick what level to start at, some may pick "The Histories" by Herodotus to start, or perhaps "Red Rising" by Pierce Brown, or even a comic book. The level that a person reads at is picked by them, and the harder the difficulty the longer it takes to fully understand what is written. This is why reading slowly occurs, yes one can speed read a simple book and understand everything, and they can even speed read a very complicated book and remember the words, but do they understand them?

The point of reading is to further the mind leveraging other peoples knowledge for yourself. That is truly powerful, one can live a hundred or even a thousand different lives whilst reading. The potential of the entire world exists in the written word, and imagine having all those various perspectives. Yet reading doesn't happen...

Perhaps it is simply setting aside the time to read, or better yet setting aside the number of pages to be read daily. This gives us an easy starting point, reading one page a day is doable and you will finish a book within a year, 1>0. Or perhaps 10 pages per a day, this means that if it can be done in 2 minutes cool (if it is understood), or it may take 2 hours. It is self-paced instead of using time as the guide, use the number of pages. Alter it for different books, and adjust it for how much reading you can do. Then increase it over time, as reading comprehension increases. Create the habit of reading.

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A Cogless World

The idea of life is to live, and to live involves an action which implies living. This means different things to different people, but living is an action word and that is something all can agree on. This means to do things, whatever things implore a person to do and thus to live. If living is about doing things and creating movement then this means that to do nothing is akin to being dead.

Doing nothing meaning to live a life that has no movement, that is stagnant and devoid of a purpose. Perhaps that is it, and that is what it means to be alive and to live, is to have a purpose. Some people have the purpose of wanting to make money, others having fulfilling relationships and some want to help make the world a better place. It is possible to argue which purpose is more meaningful but that is individualistic so fairly pointless to argue about. The key here is having something that provides a direction of movement. That is the key that having some sense of purpose provides, a reason to move forward. Religion provides that nicely, it may be why a lot of people are religious as well as a sense of community, regardless that isn't too important. The key is having that sense of purpose.

A purposeless person, has no direction and thus will stagnant easily and be wondering around in circles. The more aware a person is the more they will notice this habit and then notice that they are feeling depressed or aimless. This can be helped by simply finding a direction and heading towards it. Perhaps the direction is to make some money for now, or perhaps it is to learn programming, but that movement forward is what is helpful. Money can be tracked and so can ones skill at a new thing, that is helpful because it is tracked movement forward. This may not be a person's true purpose but it can help get the wheels turning which is better than nothing.

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Sliver Of Stress

It takes a certain amount of stress in order to get an individual moving. For some people it is a lion chasing them, for others it is the fact they have a deadline that gets them moving. Some stress is helpful. It causes the body to adapt and forces us to act, both of which can be very useful. The issue is that most people aren't a bit stressed but a lot stressed.

Stress seems to be the overwhelming state of most youth, and young adults in University or simply living life. The question that should be asked is why are they stressed? What is feeding this stress? It could be there own wish to perform but it also could be pressure from the outside world, making them chase after perfection. Pushing them to work hard, not sleep nor eat. Slowly destroying their ability to function. The scariest part of stress is that a person can become comfortable with it and can't live without it. When they aren't stressed, they become stressed about not being stressed. This is no way to live, yet it is normal and totally accepted.

When we have a bit of stress it gets us working at a higher gear, trying to solve the problem and work harder. Focusing on improving. Consider BPM, there is an ideal range that a human being needs to be at in order to function at an optimal rate.

I lost the purpose of this post, it was about how having some stress is helpful...

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Emotional Overload

At what point are emotions too much? When can we step back from the emotions we are feeling and simply say that they are not us? The answer may just be, always. It is always best to recognize that emotions and even thoughts aren't us. That they are things that occur and can provide us with data to improve our life and to know how we want to act. Extremely useful. The problem is when we get drawn into them and act as if they are everything. That is the real issue. Our life is more complicated than that, emotions can sometimes be triggered by a song or a memory that flashes by or by anything really. How can we say that we are them? The second we attach to emotions, we amplify them, if they are bad, we get worse, if they are good we get better.

Once we step back, we are no longer in the thralls of the emotion, we are simply observing them. This means they aren't being amplified or tainted. They simply are what they are, and that is it. The emotions provide us with data and we can use that data, but we aren't placing the words good and bad onto the information we are gaining. This allows for action to be easily taken and for us not to be swayed by emotion itself. Ie when we are feeling extremely happy we will not over promise, and when we feel down we will not be suicidal. Somewhat logical in our actions, or at least not hysterical with our actions.

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Trail And Error

The world has all the answers possible, if we ask google we can 'learn' anything, everything is available, if we ask some of our friends, we can get answers as well. These are great, if the answers are truly needed, but what about exploring things for ourselves? If we explore a problem we are having ourselves we may stumble upon things that we wouldn't have otherwise.

If we start off with possible solutions that we have come up, then we can play around with them. Applying them, and seeing how they work in real world situations, creating a better understanding of ourselves. We could of course go to someone who has all the answers, and could provide us with everything we need to solve the problem, but then we don't have the joy of solving it ourselves, we don't actually learn anything. We are simply half-assing something, barely applying it. Never truly learning it.

It is learning through trial and error, figuring out the path that works best for you. This actually leads to some wonderful results and long lasting ones. We were forced to try and adjust things in order to make sense of things. Learning on the go. When we do solve the problem we will be proud of ourselves and happy that we did it on our own. We can still get help, and ask for help but the goal is to simply explore the world, and some guidance is always useful.

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Inherent Selfishness

As humanbeings we look out for ourselves, this could be the large scale ie the human race or in the micro which we care about ourselves only. We are trying to maximize our gains, and this could extend to helping friends maximize their gains as well but it all stems from a selfishness. Now being selfish isn't bad. I want my friend to make money, so they live an easier life, this has the consequence of them not needing to borrow money and not complaining about the lack of money. This is doesn't mean they won't complain, but it does solve a problem.

We as people are trying to solve problems, perhaps for others but only because helping others helps us, it makes our life simpler. Selfishness can be bad, but it isn't always bad. Our parents take care of us, over other kids because of their selfish desire to see us be successful, or to carry on the family name. Or perhaps they see themselves within us and want us to be better, thus in some way they will be better. Is this bad? It can be, but so can everything. Does this degrade them helping us? Or looking out for us? Not at all, because it isn't calculated.

What makes selfishness bad is when we calculate our actions. We are trying to determine what to do based upon what benefits us the most. When we want to see someone smile because seeing them smile makes us smile, it isn't done because of that but that is simply a natural consequence of our actions. It is still selfish subconsciously or consciously but it is what most would call good. The idea of being selfish in some ways should be celebrated because great kindness comes from it, but also a great amount of pain.

I have no idea what happened in this post, but it was written...

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Frustrating Frustration

It is easy to get frustrated and to give up. It is easy to get frustrated and to never start. We can use the word lazy to describe the fact that we get easily frustrated and then give up. This is an easy pattern to ignore, as it is easy to say that this thing isn't for us. Our minds are masters of deception and trickery, we are Loki. The fact that we can hide behind frustration and trick ourselves into thinking something is too difficult would be funny if it weren't for the fact that is extremely true. That this happens a lot, especially in young men (where do I get this fact from? Completely based on my own experience.) where being frustrated leads to quitting and assuming that the thing we were trying to do was too difficult. It isn't that hard, it is easy but something in the thing we are trying to do can be tricky. The goal is to continue to do the thing, to learn and to not give up right away.

Frustration is tricky most of the time it means that we need to keep going, and that we must push through it to get to the result we desire. Sometimes though it may be a sign to take a break, a break does not mean quitting but simply pausing to allow for new ideas and new thoughts to flow. In both of these situations frustration is useful, imagine how good it'll feel once the problem is solved. How much suffering was gone through and now the end result is here. That frustration is well worth it.

We could simply quit, but we gain nothing from that, we don't actually grow or learn anything. We simply quit because we were weak. This continuous quitting due to frustration builds up the pattern of quitting and not doing what needs to be done. That is the true shame, we are depriving ourselves have actually achieving anything. We are stuck drifting between projects and things, not actually doing anything of importance. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy, so why would we bring it upon ourselves.

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Ant Man

When we think about ants, we consider them nearly nothing. They are simply insects that exist. Now when we consider ourselves, aren't we so important? We deserve to live, we are big and we build things. How dare the gods simply snuff us in mythology, we aren't insects... but aren't we?

We are simply insects that exist, we aren't anything more important. When we have an ant sit on our arm or climb our leg, we can panic or we can sit and watch. Perhaps we will have this thought about how tiny this ant is, and how we can kill it so easily. We could easily pluck it off of us, and toss it aside. This is the power of us humans, when we deal with ants. They are nothing. Now consider someone more powerful than us, an imaginary giant or perhaps even a god, we are nothing to them. They could simply pluck us off of them and kill us. We are nothing to them. So aren't we simply ants? That can be killed on a whim?

Doesn't this make us being angry at life, or perhaps sad at how things have turned out thus far sorta stupid? We are nothing but ants, yet an ant dares to walk upon us without fear. It is simply exploring, unfazed and totally out of it's element. We can easily take away it's life, we have that power but that makes one realize how precious life is. How precious being alive is. It is no longer about being more powerful but about how important allowing things to live is and to nature things. God is within an ant, and it is within us. We are both specks of dust, and great powers, depending on perspective. To be angry at a situation is simply foolish as we are nothing more than dust.

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Anger Of The Self

It is easy to be angry, you get cut off in traffic, anger. It is as simple as that, or when someone says or does something that is annoying, it is easy to get angry, even thinking about anger can make someone angry. We may wish to not be angry, but we are. We think the anger lies with others, that they are the reason we are angry or upset but is it? Does the anger we feel actually related to others, or related to ourselves?

When anger arises it has some part to do with others actions but has a much larger part to do with ourselves. We are angry because something within us is wrong and is exposed because of someone's action. When we get angry it can have to do with an inadequacy within ourselves, perhaps someone is more skilled than us or that we simply are lacking. We may get angry at the fact that we are angry, now isn't that amusing. It all resides within us, it is due to us that we are angry. It isn't the fault of the guy who cut you off, or the waiter who spilt water on your shoes or anyone elses. It is all up to you.

The waiter example brings something important up, we may get angry because we are embarrassed because we are on a date and don't want to look like a fool - that others can walk all over us. We get angry because of ourselves, and yes this point has been mentioned a lot, but it is important. We have to recognize it is because of something within us that we are angry, perhaps your wife is upset that you didn't cut the grass, you said you would. Then anger arises. Why? Simple, because you broke a promise to yourself, knowing that the grass needed to be cut but laziness was simply too great. Once we are called out, we are on the defensive because we were wrong. We got angry. We blame her for nagging, when in reality we are angry because of ourselves. We failed. Now we lash out because someone brought it up. What if we used that as a que to know what needs to be worked on. Perhaps we can make it a priority to cut the grass every week on Sunday morning. We can use our anger to guide the direction that we need to take, and to better ourselves. No longer at the whim of anger, but the chariot rider of it. A champion of it. hahaha, perhaps.

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Aim. Shoot.

Focus is the route cause of doing good work, yes practice helps but focus makes it into reality. It allows for good practice, it allows for progress to be made and that makes a world of difference. The issue that is the real problem is that we can't focus for an hour or 15 minutes, and we simply get distracted. We seek out distractions, as if that can save us from the work that must be done or for us to avoid being a failure or perhaps even a success. Their is a cost to distraction and that is mediocrity. How can this be said? Simple, I am the pinnacle of it.

Distractions are everywhere, and forever intruding. It takes a massive amount of will power to say no to a distraction, even if our desire to remain focused is high, it sometimes isn't enough. The goal is to remove distractions and to practice focus. This is where doing nothing, absolutely nothing can come in handy. Meditation can also help with focus, by solely focusing on the breathe and the current experience, we can become more adept at staying focused when we want to do something. What is staying focused? It is simply remaining in the moment, even if the moment is about thinking of the future or the past. If that is the goal, if that is the current moment then there is nothing wrong with it. As I am writing this, I am distracted by things that aren't the current moment. I am thinking of messaging Tinkered Thinking, but the moment right now is intended to write.

Distractions arise continuously, the ability to acknowledge them and then continue upon the work that needs to be done is essential. Otherwise the mind becomes clogged. Consider when you push away emotions, or thoughts, they simply get stronger and occur more and more. This is where acknowledging what is happening is important, and then proceeding with what is. That is the goal. To be able to aim, and shoot. The things that are happening around that, don't matter but they do happen. We simply need to aim and shoot with the greatest accuracy and focus that we are capable of. That is the art of Focus.

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Lost Boy

When we think about the direction we want our life to go in, we can easily find one, sometimes it is a struggle but finding a direction is simple. Think of who you admire or respect, and think about the aspects you want. Simple, really. A direction is helpful but it doesn't mean that we will be moving towards that direction, it doesn't mean things are actually being done. It simply means that we have thought a little bit. Thinking is wonderful, but it doesn't mean action will be taken. It doesn't mean that movement will occur.

What makes movement occur? A strong enough desire or perhaps a strong enough aversion to something? What makes you do the things you do? Perhaps things just happen, and the thinking is done afterwards to justify actions. That is how a lot of people explain away random events, justifying life after the fact, to make everything seem solid and not so confusing. Is it helpful to think that things just happen, and we don't really do anything? Wouldn't that lead to us being stuck, not changing, and simply flowing on the river of life? Now isn't that key right there? To float along, then when we see something we really want, we can start swimming like a mad lad?

If we were to do that, then we will be able to find things we like/want and alter our life, but one off events rarely lead to a good life (however one defines that). The life someone ends up with is what they do consistently, ie their habits. So floating along and then swimming towards something may be foolish depending on what is being floated on. Perhaps what needs to be done is to build a better raft, to not have to swim and have the raft do the work for you? What does that actually mean? That means to build habits and build a different life, a new raft(perhaps even a boat, with a motor). This comes down to changing things that are done daily, but that is easy to think about or even type or read, much harder to actually do. So then we are at the point of actually doing.

Now what? hahahah that is the question that needs to be answered, here it is simply doing one thing for a month then adding another thing. It has to be simple, adding things simply, ie 1 thing a week, building up that habit, realizing life is long but it is so short if we do nothing. If we stay stagnant and simply fade away.

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The Downfall Of Expectations

Expectations create this new world in our minds, a world that doesn't really exist but in our perspective it is real. We have disassociated ourselves from the present moment and then jumped into the future and created this wonderful paradise or perhaps a hellscape - we can now live in that during the present moment. This can be a wonderful thing because now we can work towards that future, now what happens when that future doesn't occur?

If we have expectations we are confirming that reality, and becoming attached to it, as if it is real and to us it is. Now if those expectations were shattered, our reality that we became attached to (that never existed) becomes corrupted and we are stuck in a place of dissatisfaction as the world isn't the way we imagined it. This is similar to when someone cheats on you, the foundation of your perspective gets shattered or shifted, and yes being cheated on is a lot worse. The real problem with having high and many expectations is that these are micro cracks in the foundation. They can compound on each other and slowly break down the human spirit, as our entire world can become shattered.

Does this mean that expectations are bad? Or perhaps that high expectations are bad? Perhaps (hahaha). If we take the latter as correct then we should always have low expectations and be cynical, then we will never be disappointed and reality will always be better (or so we hope). The issue with low expectations or being cynical is that it taints the current experience, our perspective on everything will be negative and thus our life in general will become more negative. That seems like a bad way to live, imagine going through 30 years of life or 75 years by simply expecting everything to go wrong, that doesn't sound like a life worth living. So where is the balance?

It could be that expectations are fine as long as no attachment exists for those expectations, ie assuming they are reality. This sounds easy, but may simply be impossible as having expectations creates desire for a certain outcome and the mind will turn that into a reality that is expected. Now another option once again difficult is to just observe what is happening, such that you are simply being present and noticing what is happening without judgement.

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Fearful Living

It is easy to live a life full of fear, where every action is taken to avoid discomfort and to live within what is known. This is an 'easy' life and some can find fulfillment within it. Some people can't do that, they must seek out dangerous activities that most are afraid of, just to avoid what is happening within themselves. Running away, but acting as if they are exploring the unknown. Sadly they aren't, they are simply escaping. Now there are other people who avoid these dangerous activities out of fear of living (or dying) and they use the excuse that they are working on themselves as a manner in which to avoid living. The mine can come up with a dozen different excuses to not act, to run away all within a split second. We are escape artists though perhaps not as good as Houdini.

The mind is attempting to protect us from ourselves, but that doesn't allow us to enjoy our lives. We are living in fear in the attempt not to be hurt and perhaps that is disguised as not wanting to hurt others, thus we hide away. We don't explore the unknown, avoiding doing new things and simply being barely alive. Of course it is easy to become accustomed to this life style because it is comfortable. Avoidance is easy, consider all the projects you wanted to start but haven't. It is easier to do nothing and to simply complain. This is the path of most living, simply because of how good they have become at tricking themselves. Our minds are Loki, they live to trick us. It is our job to escape that pattern and to live the life we want.

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Attaining Everything

We attempt to climb mountains because it is rewarding, working towards a very difficult and time consuming goal feeds the soul. This may be why people love videogames, it is a way of doing something to try to feed the soul, attempting to climb a mountain. Is it the same as something that is, let's say more tangible, no it isn't but it is something. We strive to achieve greatness and being the best because it is difficult and because it forces us to work hard. Now the journey to getting up the mountain is rewarding but what about when you get to the top?

Here is the thing that isn't enough for most people. Most people need to find the next mountain or they will begin to wither away because they have lost their purpose in that pursuit. Now the neat trick here is the pursuit isn't over, when you get to the top, because now one can explore the nuance and take risks to learn more and to do the climb backwards. This is where a person can have the most fun, but this takes time to observe and to put into action.

We need a challenge, or something to make us act and to live most who stride up a mountain, seek the thrill of the difficulty of it. They need it. They can't live without it, and this can be dangerous because it means that a person just ends up rushing through their entire life. One moment, the next then the next, never noticing all the moments that are passing them by, and all the precious flowers and animals that cross their path. At the end of their life, they are left with nothing, sometimes feeling empty other times worried their legacy will be tainted. Alone.

The struggle is perhaps where people find salvation, it is where one has a purpose a fight to fight. When everything is said and done, having everything is boring. We then must create new problems for ourselves in order for us to fuel the fire within. Of course this can be false for some, or perhaps false entirely, the goal here is for you, the reader to see your own observations.

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An Invisible Force

Seeing beautiful Youtube videos is common place now, a decade ago this was rare, seeing any professional looking video was only meant for the elite. Now a street rat can have the same professional quality that anyone else has, but what is the cost?

Seeing all the beauty from almost every single channel can become desensitizing, it's common and it's taken for granted at times. Yes, it can be there full time job or they may have professional grade equipment that can help them do it easily, but not everyone has those two things. Even if they, they had to work to get to where they are. The thing every beautiful channel and anything of any value has behind it is effort! Effort is the equalizer of all things, yes some people have different advantages but at the end of the day the amount of effort to begin any pursuit is roughly the same.

Effort is what must be applied in order for anything to be accomplished over time as ability grows it becomes easier to accomplish the same level at a reduced effort input, but this came at an initial cost. This is what we don't see when we watch beautiful videos, we don't see all the effort that was applied. All the work, and all the time that goes unnoticed for every single video or even anything you read or see. A piece of furniture that is built by hand, it didn't magically appear or a super functional backpack made of leather, that took time and effort - yet we only see the result. We seem to discount all the effort and time that was applied to get that end result. The invisible force that is never really recognized, even by the person doing the work at times. The thoughts of "oh that wasn't too hard" or "anyone can do it". Yes, anyone can do it, but no one will. The cost of effort is too high for them, and thus you exist.

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The ability to talk to another about the world and the universe is somewhat of a blessing. It allows for new explorations to occur and having someone that can give you the motivation to stride into the unknown is a wonderful thing. This is also rare at times, most people don't think about the universe nor the unknown, but once one or two people are found that run in the same vein then life starts clicking a little bit better.

This clicking isn't about anything special really, it is more about how the questions that were being asked, finally have some answers or better yet some more questions from another person. This allows for a deeper exploration of the world to occur. More of the unknown gets explored, a deeper sense of fulfillment starts to begin to rise, but this all begins with personal curiosity. The willingness to explore allows for questions to arise, this allows for new things to be seen.

Other people can help amplify and clarify some things, but it really begins with you. These random people, or friends simply help unlock little things within us, which can lead to us exploring more and doing more but they aren't really doing anything special. What they are doing is what is in their nature which is to explore, and to live life. You, just happened to be there, and they were happy to assist because it meant having another person to chat about the world, and another person that can appreciate the wild things that life has to offer. It is simply wordplay in action. A few words to unlock the potential within a person, then it's just chatting and laughing, perhaps even crying. All with the purpose of curiosity, leading to new lights and new sights.

Some people think they are the only ones who are interested in these topics, but that isn't so true. We like to believe we are the only ones, but there are plenty of people around that enjoy these topics as well. The problem lies within us, we don't openly discuss curiosity so others don't. As we begin to explore, we meet other explorers, and that is how these connections start to form. Then we can have people who can play with words with us; perhaps even play words with friends.

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Ticking Future

Right now the future is ticking away, right now the future is being shaped yet here you are. We can either take care of the future version of ourselves or we can doom it for all eternity (that being the future). This is the option we have as we go through life, we can decide to live a better life for a future version of ourselves or we can choose to do nothing.

Doing nothing is easy, because it involves no effort but that is no effort for the present version of you, the future is compounded by the past. This means that the present moment is the most valuable thing in the world, it can create a future we love or destroy it. Right now, we have a choice to make to take the actions that will benefit us in the future or take the actions that will hinder our growth. Even though this is a simple concept to understand, in application it is much harder. Our brains trick us, we overvalue our present 'happiness' when we compare it to the future, so we tend to avoid working on the things we know we need to and spend that time doing nothing. Nothing is the wrong word, we are working on things but those things aren't really significant to us. We won't look back and say that was a wise choice, but simply not even remember it. This is how life ends up passing us by.

The goal is to play with both the present moment and prepare ourselves for the future, easily said but hard to do. We must learn our own limits for the amount of nothingness we do when compared to the amount of actual future prepping we are doing. The future will come, sooner than one expects and the future is ruthless. It isn't going to value not knowing, or the lack of foresight, it punishes that. The past punishes us for not having fun, when we look back at our memories or lack thereof. This is the tightrope humans must walk, we must figure out our own balance, where our strengths and weaknesses lie. As well as knwoing when we lie ;)

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Knowing Yourself

Knowing yourself is a hard endeavor because we are so good at tricking ourselves into things that aren't true or that is a twisted version of reality. The issue is that we are in the reality and have our various perspectives and thus taint everything we look at. This is what holds us back from understanding ourselves, but it is also our biggest strength. If we decided to use the various perspectives and how they influence our reality we can see who we actually are.
Looking at ourselves is easy, but we are so biased and we lack the ability to be objective when it comes to ourselves that we can actually use that. If we decide to look at ourselves through one lense ie our current perspective and then play with our beliefs, thus altering our perspective. This allows us to use a new lense to look at ourselves. Perhaps this is overly complicated.

Perhaps who we are, and knowing ourselves simply comes down to the thoughts that arise, the patterns we do and the habits we keep? That is all there is to it, and if we alter those things we end up being a different person. We don't have to worry about the other things, and simply focus on that. Thinking about what habits we want, and what we have then bridging the gap. Slowly molding ourselves into a better version of ourselves in some way. Then knowing ourselves seems a lot easier. It is all about understanding the things we do and the habits we have. It isn't about anything else. Simple right? This also allows for actions to taken, whereas before knowing ourselves was more esoteric, we couldn't pin ourselves down so we would spend hours if not lifetimes trying to break apart the pieces and play with all these things to understand ourselves. It doesn't need to be that complicated, but we make it so.

The reason we make it so complicated is that we don't want to change or perhaps we don't want to know what kind of person we are, because of that. We simply wish to stay in the fog because it's familiar and requires no action.

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Pattern Re-optimization

Observing patterns is wonderful, we can learn so much from simply observing what is occurring within ourselves, but there is a limit. The goal of observing is to notice, notice what is happening and then perhaps even see why it is happening. Then what? We have noticed, we have observed but what meaning does that bring to our lives?

That is the question, now isn't it? The thing with patterns and even habits is that once they are ingrained it becomes difficult to break, but is it difficult to use it as que for something else? Consider this pattern, when we feel laziness or the idea of procrastination that is a signal that we should do this thing that we are avoiding. It allows us to use this negative pattern of procrastination as a positive signal to actually do the work. Now perhaps the procrastination leads to other work being done, but that is really busy work. We know what is important because of the pattern of avoidance of that thing, and that tells us everything we need to know. Observation occurred, then noticing of why it occurs and using that as a compass allows us to figure out what really needs to be done. This is a simple version of pattern re-optimization.

This is nice of course, but it can be done for anything. We can notice a pattern and use that as a que for other things. Consider food, notice if you binge eat when you are stressed or perhaps when bored. This allows us to use our patterns as a manner of influencing our behaviour. We become aware and then can manipulate ourselves into doing other things. Do we reach for the remote controller once we get home? Ask the question as to why, 'oh it's a habit of relaxation', now what if that remote was replaced with a book, or the batteries were taken out of the remote. Taking those batteries out, breaks that habit as now we need to find some. We have given ourselves a chance to choose something else, and we can observe our cravings.

We can use the things that we do to our advantage instead of being a slave to them.

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The Beginning Of Laziness

Laziness is just a form of resistance, and this the thing that humanbeings struggle against. Resistance is what stops us from achieving or doing anything, it's primary job is to 'protect' us and to halt our progress in life. The form of resistance that is most common is laziness, or procrastination - they both seem to be the same thing at the end of the day.

The belief that there will be time later is the biggest issue, we like to think that we will have time later for a thing that is already being avoided and that is something that is laughable. Time continues to tick even if we 'decide' that something can be post poned. Here is an interesting question, if something was post poned once then why wouldn't it be post poned again? Laziness won once, so why wouldn't it win again? What is stopping you, from deciding to simply wait another day? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. That is the cost of being human, I suppose. Running away from things that should be done today because we devalue time in the future and overvalue the time now.

We are trying to achieve some goal, or something that is important to us but we push it away, because we would rather be doing X now, but there is no reason not to do the goal. We have time now, but we allow ourselves to believe that we will do it in the future. This is the most interesting aspect, things simply getting pushed further and further away. Soon we may simply 'forget' about the thing we needed to do. Fun fact: We don't forget that thing, it lives in the back of our mind as a rotting seed.

So what can be done? It is like inspiration that we must be instant in our action. When we are getting out of bed, the second we talk ourselves into 5 more minutes or at X time we will get up, we have lost all hope of getting up. The day can easily turn to mush after that, because we most likely lied to ourselves. That is a problem, isn't it? That lying to ourselves, leads to trust issues within but that is a whole other problem. We must strike whilst the iron is hot and keep it hot. Do the things that were planned out, because the second all those are done we are free. We have achieved what we set out to do, and now can do whatever we want. This could be doing nothing or it could be continuing to work (as once something gets going it'll keep going for a bit longer than expected).

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Ideas Slippin Away

When we think about ideas, there is the belief that the ideas we have will come back to us if they are important and if they aren't they will just enter the void. Whereas the other belief is to write down every single idea that comes to mind, so that way nothing gets lost and it is easy to grasp at those ideas in the future. In the end what a person does typically leans on one side or the other.

The idea of ideas coming back to you, after they have been hatched can come from two primary places, laziness and the other from the belief that something out there will remind you of it, if it is important (the belief that everything happens for a reason). To those whop firmly believe in notes and tracking every idea this is absurd, and to a point they are correct. We don't know what is important, if that is unknown then tracking everything makes sense, but it takes a huge amount of time and effort. Having the belief that if it is important then it'll come back to you, mitigates the problem of figuring out what is important for ourselves and also mitigates the time problem of tracking everything. This is where the problem arises though, whilst this belief allows for a carefree mindset, it has drawbacks.

Imagine trying to write a post on an idea that arose wilst driving, that idea was not tracked and when sitting down to write or to even think that idea is nowhere to be found. It is simply gone, and that right there is the problem. Now the justification for this is simple, the idea wasn't important or good enough, but who are we to judge whether it was or wasn't if we can't even remember the idea? Yes, the theme of that specific idea continues to come up, but it isn't that particular idea. So what is a person to do?

This all depends on the type of person some one is, and what they deem to be important to them, some people only write one word notes, quick and an easy way to jog the memory (hahahah as if memories can jog, unless of course it is a memory of jogging), others full fledged notes about everything and of course those who don't write down everything. The one beautiful thing about writing things down is that once something is captured it can be let go off by the mind. Pick your weapon.

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Creativity Slump

Creative is a flowing thing, it gushes and it slows sometimes at a whim, other times it is overwhelming. The ideas simply spew out us, and we don't have enough paper to write down all the thoughts and the ideas that are arising. Then there is the dreaded slump. The time where very few ideas arise and most of them are simply terrible when compared to the gems that one was previously spitting out.

The slump could arise for any number of reasons but none of them are too important, what is important is what can be done when that creative slump arises. The simple answer is nothing, the more complicated answer is a complex way of doing nothing. We can't force creativity to arise but what we can do is stimulate it, with a consumption of knowledge with mixed periods of silence and contemplation about the world. We take on the new ideas and play with them, connecting them to previous ideas held and making completely new thoughts available to the mind. Then in the silence it can be consildated and the mind gets a chance to play. It is no longer trying to create and produce something, but simply having fun with what it has learned and the observations it can make within the silence. The key isn't to force things but to allow things to arise naturally and to get the mind stimulated in a new way wilst also allowing it to experience boredom.

Boredom allows for the mind to start doing it's thing, which is filling the boredom with play. This isn't something that can be stimulated by videogames or movies or even working out, but out of nothing. Perhaps a walk with no music or podcast playing, simply the silence of the world around you and perhaps the chaos within. This is where the boredom takes hold and the mind begins to loosen up and play.

It is within play that true genius is crafted.

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Simple Starts

It is simpler than we make it out to be. Simpler in the sense of how much work and effort is actually required. Within a single day the entire thing could be started and nearly complete, yet it is avoided. This avoidance arises on the bases of having to do work and the mental strain that arises from doing said work. That is the problem that must be overcome.

If we began everyday by conquering a mental hurdle, finding joy within climbing over that hurdle then doing it again would also be easier, then the next time would be easier and the next. It is getting comfortable with the idea of applying mental effort to solve problems that can help us do the things we are trying to avoid, not because of a fear of failure but out laziness. This is more pronounced in those that have finished schooling and have a job. There is no 'need' to apply effort, or to climb those mental hurdles but those are what keep us on our toes. It is also what allows us to grow, at a visible rate, where we can see ourselves changing and altering into better versions of ourselves.

The way to increase our comfort level for approaching and overcoming mental hurdles is simply through doing it daily and constantly whenever the opportunity arises, big or small. That is where people seem to mess up on, they skip the little stuff and then tell themselves that they will do it when something actually important arises. Then that important thing arises, and nothing is done. Then another excuse and no action is taken.

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Returning To Zero

The feeling of defeat arises in every single person, sometimes lasting a minute other times lasting weeks this is apart of the existence of mankind. The issue isn't that this feeling arises but what actions we take when it arises. It is easy to fall apart and allow everything to slip away, thus confirming the feeling of defeat and much harder to do something about it.

When we choose to do something about that feeling, it can be as simple as just trying, trying to do the things we typically do on a day or it can be more complicated than that. We can reset back to when we were in peak condition, restarting our day and running the day in the way it used to be run. The entire focus being on trying to get the train back on the tracks, thus stopping the feeling of being derailed. That is the aspect that must be focused on. It isn't that the feeling of defeat is wrong, but the running away that is. Perhaps that is what is needed, to create some distance between the feeling and yourself. This gives some room to breathe and just some time to relax before taking up the mantel and going at it full steam ahead.

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Learning Over Time

Learning is a process and this means that it can't be done in one go. We can't become masters at something in a single day, it takes many hours and many months to become proficient in a new thing. As time goes on, we do see improvement from when we began but it doesn't mean that everything is known.

When we are learning we are absorbing a ton of information constantly in short bursts along with over time which is a great thing but we end up missing a lot of little details. We could be using Black Pepper and not even be aware that it comes from black peppercorns, this is a simple lack of knowledge about names, yet the ability to correctly use black pepper still exists. Does this make a cook unqualified? Perhaps, but it is a simple error that could easily be corrected, within a second. That is the thing with knowledge, it must be learned over time, as their are hundreds of nuances that exist in every aspect of a field of knowledge that it is impossible to touch on them all within a day.

The best thing that can be done is to work on a craft or a sphere of knowledge every single day to slowly build up familiarity with the subject and to begin to really grasp the nuance of a topic.

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Hopes On The Heavens

It is easy to hope for the world, or a result that we seek betting the world on it and forgoing a backup plan, then when things fall through, we are simply stuck with failure. This easily leaves a sour taste in our mouth because we thought we could make it.

There is a belief in the world that if we don't go all in on something it will fail but where does it say that we have to place all our beliefs on it? If we were baking a pizza and we had the complete faith it would work, and believed it would be perfect and then it just didn't turn out good, or edible... Now we are crushed and we end up with no pizza and perhaps a bit disheartened. What if we believed the pizza was going to be great, but didn't put any expectations on it, thus leaving our heart perfectly capable. This is a bit cynical but also extremely practical once perfected. Though one could argue that the reason belief works is because it coupled with emotion, and that disheartened feeling pushes further into the realm of greatness.

My pizza turned out trash.

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The Boundaries of Mankind

We exist in a world full of hopes, dreams and beliefs. A beautiful thing when allowed to grow and expand and explore the edges of what is known. The thing with dreams and beliefs is that they can be crushed and slammed into nothingness, left to only explore what is known. Explore is the wrong word though, simply traveling the path of what is known. No longer seeking the edges of reality, and the dreams that are held there. That is the thing that isn't talked about very often, how dreamers and explorers end up dying so young. All that is left is a husk of an empty box.

Consider how many ideas were simply slipping away from you, when a chance arose to grow and to explore what isn't known, was it avoided? This is the problem with humanbeings now, we fear failure when our ancestors had to face failure after failure just to allow us to be where we are. Alive. Forgetting this is easy, knowing it is also easy, living like this, that is hard.

As a human our success came from exploring the edges of what is known and accepted, pushing the boundaries of what is known. It is going through the fear, and approaching the boundary, not with the chance of failure in mind, but the only option that could ever be was success, to conquer this tiny patch of unknown and claim it for humanity. Consider the fastest 100m or the fastest mile? Whenever the time was beat, it shocked the world and then a new limit is created. Then that limit isn't surpassed because everyone is fearful of it, but that old limit that was thought of never being beat, is being beat by everyone. The mental concept of impossible is a very strong prison that many get trapped in, it makes things that are attainable, simply unattainable.

The goal is to live right at the edge of the boundary of what is known, this provides us some safety and gives us a chance at finding something new.

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A Doctored World

When pictures from wars that occurred in the 1800-2000's there were many pictures taken, some showing gruesome scenes, others showing victories that have happened. They invoke a feeling within a person, give an image a snazzy title or caption and now that feeling transforms into a rigid emotion, one that can get a person to act. This is the beauty of photography, but what are the chances of capturing the perfect scene? Pretty slim, so many things happen every moment of every second in a day.

In the present day we have memes, and the news cuts certain sections out of interviews to shed a narrative they wish to push. This has always happened, but now we are somewhat aware of it. What if those emotions from oh so long ago, were doctored? That dead bodies were dragged around to show a scene of death and portray people as guilty, or perhaps dragging a flag up a hill after the battle is won, but reenacting certain sections. Now that is a beautiful in the moment picture. A book called "Regarding the Pain of Others" by Susan Sontag mentions how many photographers would be paid by the army or others to go to battles and capture certain images, to increase morale at home, or help them gain support of the war. When we think about photographs which were taken before 2000 we never consider them doctored, but what if they were?

Life now, and life then isn't so different, yes things may move faster now and technology is a lot more advanced, but the general idea of altering things to fit a certain narrative goes back centuries. We want to appear as the good guys to our people, and we want the bad guys to appear horrible thus justifying our actions. This makes sense though.

If we consider daily life now, it is easy to fake a picture or to make something appear better or worse than it actually is - in fact it is encouraged by all the likes we get on social media. A lot of things must be questioned now, we need to seek the truth behind the image. This means to ask the question, what does this person gain from this image? What is this trying to show me?

The world is full of tricks, and these can be fun but they can also be well tricky. Ask the questions and explore the world, as everything is trying to sway you to something. Even this.

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Sea Of Knowledge

Knowledge is everywhere from books, to people, and even within conversations. This is the beautiful thing about living life, it's constantly learning and having new information being thrown at a person. We have the ability to grow and learn, from everything, yet how many of us take that time to learn? Who puts in an hour or two a day to learn something they love or better yet what they hate?

We have hundreds of thousands of books, internet resources, and even podcasts all with valuable information. We can start learning now and we can continue learning for the rest of our lives, that is the beauty of the world we live in. The more information that can be accumulated, the more dots we can begin to connect the more accurate representation of the world we can create. This information can then be translated into action, and a deeper understanding of the things around us. This also applies to ourselves, as our understanding of ourselves will increase.

The key to growth is learning, not just more about the world but more about ourselves. This is typically the case when you end up learning things from outside your wheel house.

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The Game Of Self

Competition is sometimes frowned upon within children, and even within adults because everyone should be a winner. If we all put in effort, we can all win. This idea is built up so strongly, give everyone an award because they all tried. Yes, they did and that is commendable but also not how the world works.

What is competition? It can be a driving force for achieving greatness or it can be something that hinders us from achieving anything. This is when we think happiness derives from competition and winning. The value that is placed on winning, taints all other experiences because that is the only high a person can end up feeling. This is one of the toxic aspects of competition, the other is people feeling terrible when they don't win. Now this can end up either pushing them to become better or to simply wallow in their sadness - really this is up to the person. If a person can strike a competition to produce greatness but not be addicted to winning, then that is a beautiful thing. Most of the technology we have today is out of competition, to be the best, to make the most money, to get that investor money. It is a great positive thing, because the enjoyment of books is now available to all, among other things.

The real point is that competition is constantly occurring, we can either compete or fade out of existence. Here is the trick that no one mentions, we choose the competitors for the most part. We can either compete with ourselves or we can try to compete with the entire world. The first option can lead to insane amounts of growth, because it is all internal, it's a slow improvement over a lifetime. Whereas the other option is impossible to ever really win, yes you can be pushed further, but to what end? Even when death occurs, the competition isn't over. We can't even die peacefully because we feel as if we missed out on something.

Life is but a game, played by us. If we can't treat it as such, then what is the point? We are stuck competing against the world, and hoping others fail instead of trying to lift them up. The second we turn the game from multiplayer to single player, things become so much easier. We end up wanting others to win nearly as much as we want ourselves to win.

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Applied Effort

In the beginning of any endeavor or any project the amount of effort required to begin and to continue onwards is high. We doubt ourselves, and then begin to think that the endeavor isn't worth it. By this time how many dozens of excuses have been made, all in order to stop any effort from being applied? Killing the chance to actually accomplish anything meaningful.

Effort is the cost of admission to everything. Most of the time the amount of effort required is never reached, this is how we never kept going with that pottery project we wanted to start, or why we quit writing after a week. The amount of effort could not be sustained for any meaningful amount of time. This is the problem that every humanbeing faces when attempting to do something. The question of how to best start and continue doing something arises.

In the end we wish to do things that will enhance our life, but just because we know future us would appreciate it, doesn't mean that the current version of us would appreciate it. Thus we enter a conundrum of where to begin and how to keep going. This is met with a lot of resistance unto itself, it is hard to begin something new, and to know that we will suck at it. We only have one option. Reduce the amount of effort or expectation that has been applied to this new endeavour.

When starting a project, just start with the simplest and easiest version of it. For writing, just write a sentence a day, or for 10 minutes a day. Pick something small and tangible that is directly impacting the goal, that can be done daily. It is easy to write a single sentence everyday, more likely than not we will end up writing a few more sentences than one. This idea has arisen from many people before, but what matters is simply decreasing the amount of applied effort required and then using the limited willpower available to do the task. This means doing the task immediately upon getting out of bed, as we have the most will power then. That applied effort, may get easier over time, or it may stay consistent and our will power has simply gone up, but it doesn't matter. What matters is that the endeavour is being pursued.

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Knowing Yourself

When someone asks the question "Do you know yourself?" What does that actually mean, how can someone know themselves? Perhaps that is impossible as we are constantly changing, and who we are is not a stationary being. Or perhaps they mean to ask what is the manner in which life is driven, or the past versions that make up the present self?

If that is the question that is truly being asked, it is quite easy. It involves recognizing patterns and the behaviour that is displayed on a constant basis. This is quite simple when awareness is high, meditation is a great tool in order to generate a high sense of awareness. Then knowing who you are is a breeze. Now what if the meaning of knowing who are you are is more about what drives your life and the actions that are taken, then what does it mean? It simply means what are the core values that make actions occur? This involves motivation, beliefs and what someone wants the future to look like.

That description provides some mental clarity, but is it relevant to living and improving life? If it isn't then what is? This may be that, the question doesn't lead to anything fruitful. The real question that should be asked, is what is the behaviour is that appearing in patterns, and what is the ideal behaviour that a future version will achieve. Allowing the creation of action steps to reach the desired result, figuring out who has that behavior and how did they achieve it. The goal is to improve, until we are satisfied then improve again. Going up, then pausing, then going up, then perhaps going down, and the process continues. Observing the behaviour that is displayed and then modeling the behaviour of others is what can allow for the most amount of potential growth.

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Success or Responsibility

The fear of success is typically what stops most people from being successful but is it actually fear of success or simply a fear of responsibility? Considering what success means, it is easy to infer that more success means more work as success breads success (that is a lot of success in a single sentence). This will most definitely lead to a greater amount of responsibility, and who really wants that?

Responsibility means that there can be less fucking around and involves more seriousness, this is something man childs and people who want freedom seek to avoid. Responsibility and success seem to be intertwined together, and that can leave a sour taste in ones mouth. It isn't that success is bad, but that responsibility means to grow up and take care of something that isn't just you. That is the biggest thing. That is something that must be approached if one fears success or fears responsibility.

People tend to avoid things that cause them stress and responsibility is that. That is true for the most part, and that must be challenged. If a person who avoids responsibility and success continues to do so, how can the world justify giving them anything good? Why would random people or friends trust them with anything? If all that the person wants is to be free of responsibility? This is the question that should be asked as it leads a person to see why they should stop avoiding success and responsibility. Both of those things open doors, and yes some doors close but that is the consequence of living a full life. New things arise, and replace old things. Childhood fades, and adulthood appears. Doesn't mean it didn't happen, or that that part of you doesn't exist, it simply means that one can switch over to what is necessary.

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Daisy Chain

One good action, can lead to another good action, then another and another, but it all seems to start with the first action.

The trick seems to be that a good action must be done then and only then can another action of the same genre (good) can be done. Perhaps this is why so many people mention that making your bed first thing in the morning is the best way to build up the wins for the day. Once the first win occurs, the idea of winning becomes more accepted, not accepted but expected! It is no longer acceptable to do poorly, or let the potential of action be negative. The win ensures that positive action occurs because that is what is known. This may be the best reason to stack wins, as disappointing the self is the greatest shame.

If the first win can be captured, daisy chaining other wins or good actions becomes easy, for all the reasons previously stated and also because an upward trajectory tends to continue to go up. This idea is somewhat borrowed from Jordan Peterson, he has the belief that a person who is taking charge of their life will continue to do so, and continue to grow; whereas a person who is going down hill ie losing or doing bad actions will continue to do so. It becomes an expectation of the self to continue to do what the self expects. If a person sees themselves as a fitness person, they prioritize fitness thus leading to them to workout everyday. Now consider a person who views themselves as a failure, they tend to continue to fail. This isn't because they are inherently failures but because the expectation is to fail.

What a person can do is try to daisy chain things, creating the expectation of success, of the need to be successful. It is no longer a wish, nor are the actions not being taken but everything is working together.

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Distractions In Action

Distractions are the bane of existence, they arise not because of anything special in the world but as a way to avoid the things that must be done or should be done. The thing with distractions is that they form habit loops within the mind, and as more distractions are arising and being accepted the easier it is to be distracted the next time. Then concious effort must be applied to ensure that minium distractions are within the surrounding area when trying to work. As well as thinking about not engaging in the distractions.

This is the struggle as it leads to procrastination. As avoidance occurs more and more thus allowing distractions to create strong habit loops, the force to do the actions that are subjectively good for the self decreases. It decreases as an exponential rate, until one day the realization of life being wasting occurs until then the distractions are shiny nice things. A way to avoid working and doing what must be done, along with what should be done.

The goal should be to stop distractions from turning into action, they will arise but they must not be acted upon. Not acting upon them after doing them for so long causes a great deccrease in will power. Every single time will power is used to not be distracted to break that habit loop, a chance is created to do productive work. This is all that can be hoped for, as distractions are a part of life. To limit them is all that can be done, and sometimes distractions will be acted upon and that is also a part of life. The give and take.

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Consequence Of Action

When action is taken there is a consequence. The matter isn't about if, but when. The consequence could be positive or negative, but it will occur. That is something that must be accepted, one that is failed to be accepted, perhaps out of fear or simply believing that an action can be taken without anything happening because of it.

The daily life of anyone has so many actions and all of those actions have consequences, this could be not working out one day or skipping going on a walk when the day is beautiful. Everything has a marker on it, and that makes some things more worth it than other things. It is what makes life worth living, and this also makes doing certain things worth it. Once all actions are equal then it ruins life, nothing matter because there is no choice being made. Nothing to risk, zero skin in the game, not without a lack of effort but simply because there is no consequence to an action.

Eat that last slice of cake is an action, and it has an immediate positive consequence and then can have a negative consequence later on, such a sugar crash or perhaps an addiction to cake. This is like most things, there are positive and negative short term consequences and then their are long term consequences. The goal of a person is to optimize those consequences in such a way that life is enjoyed in the moment and in the future. This is where being okay with some suffering is important, because it allows for negative short term consequences ie brain ache, and long term positive consequences, ie better able to solve problems. Choose wisely, everything has a consequence, so in the end it doesn't matter.

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Lost Opportunities

When a problem occurs, the easiest solution is to get upset or look for the simplest solution. Being upset solves nothing, but can make the problem seem bigger than it is, thus protecting our ego. The other option is stopping the problem all together, if the problem doesn't exist life continues as per status quota. Out of the two options, one is clearly more preferable, but neither are ideal to a growing human.

The solution that should be seeked is not even viewing the problem as a problem but as an opportunity to learn, to grow and to explore. As some great saying by some old guy says, it isn't the problem that is the problem but our attitude towards the problem. If the flipping of the problem into something that is a lesson or something that we can learn from, then there is a completely different manner in which solutions are looked for. It is no longer about the fastest solution but the most practical. Giving things time to incubate and for exploration of the problem to occur.

When an opportunity arises, the feeling of endless possibilities occurs, the belief that anything may be possible. That is what must be tapped into. The second we flip the switch from problem to opportunity, the endless possibilities can start to occur. Perhaps this is a potential business idea, or perhaps it will allow for growth to occur. The switch from problem to opportunity reframes the entire situation into something new - something worth exploring.

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Consistent Data

When building something consistency and data can assist in making accurate assumptions and vast improvements in whatever it is. Data provides the information needed to make an informed decision, and consistency is essential to gather multiple data points.

Consider the following numbers: 5, 25, 65 - what is the pattern? Impossible to tell, right? Now imagine if there were more data points between all those numbers, like so: 5, 15, 25, 35, 65... The pattern is rather obvious, it isn't hidden away and then guessed with a dozen or so assumptions. It is simple. That is all due to having more data points, the patterns show themselves. The best way to gather the most accurate data points is to be consistent.

If a person weighs themselves consistency once they wake up, they will have a more accurate representation of their true weight. If a person decides to weigh themselves at night, then in the morning and sometimes after a workout, they may still have the same amount of data points but they aren't as useful. The consistent time, and the consistent schedule helps to iron out all those assumptions that can be made. It allows for those random things that occur as a byproduct of being alive to be accounted for, without ever having to know exactly what they are.

The goal is to gather meaningful date, and sometimes it is hard to tell what data is meaningful until it is needed. So what is to be done? Collect as much as possible, at least the data that costs very little time to track. This is essential to allowing for informed decisions in the future.

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The Evolution Of the Blog

I remember when I started this, write for 20 mins every single day. I thought I would quit after a month or two(realistically a week) or just allow it to dwindle out of existence, it didn't. This is partially because some people decided to read, then someone decided to share the blog on their twitter. I had to write. I couldn't stop, already two months in, having maybe one or two readers, fuck ain't that something? The beginning, at least when looked back upon shows some of the worst writing ever. The ideas were still good, or at least the same in terms of value, but the way they were expressed was poor at best. Those one or two readers, if they remain have seen some major transformations in the blog over the past year.

The first transformation is, this is no longer screenshots taken of Notepad++ (thank you TinkeredThinker for encouraging the creation of this blog and of writing.), but that isn't really a transformation. The true transformation is the style and the method of writing that is now in progress. The beginning the writing was written with "I"s and "me"s, a selfish way to write in some degree but that is what it began as. A selfish pursuit in trying to improve thinking. Then a challenge was issued, try to write without using "I"s or "Me". It was met with a bit of resistance but was conquered, to some degree. After that, Tinkered Thinker mentioned how I should read over some of my recent posts, and the realization of the behemoth amount of "you"s used within 300 words. Just wow. It was insane, still some people kept reading. This of course led to me never using the word "you" or at least restraining the use of "you", thus began the era of "we", "us" and of course "our". This was the next evolution, attempting to step further away and to write for something more than ME. It was interesting, I became extremely comfortable with that style of writing. What was next? Removing all pronouns, writing as if it was a textbook. Byfar the hardest method of writing, at least for me. Removing myself and everything completely and writing in some foreign manner. I am currently working on this, perhaps for a month or maybe a few months all in the hopes of improving my ability to write and to convey thoughts. Isolating different styles of writing and trying to get a handle on them. That is sorta of the goal right now. Once this goal is achieved, then can I begin mixing and matching various writing methods to hopefully produce some nice writing.

The content of the blog hasn't changed. It is still about me living my life and thinking my thoughts, trying to iron out ideas and explore various concepts. That is what this is all about. It is fun, and sometimes annoying. The amount of time spent on the blog has vastly decreased in terms of writing time. Most posts are completed within 12 mins, some go over and some go under but the speed at which 350 words of some meaning are produced has vastly improved. The thing that hasn't improved is the length of the post, ie more words being written within 20 minutes. That has not increased, which in some ways is a shame, perhaps it is because I do not edit or reflect on the post much - I simply write. Or it could be that I am avoiding longer form content because it involves going deeper into the idea, and perhaps thinking about it for longer. This is something, I would love your feedback on. Feel free to hit me up on Twitter. Something to think about, at least for me.

Now what about the future of Thoughts Of Contemplation? It shall continue, and hopefully never stop. The website will be undergoing some upgrades and changes in the coming month(ideally a week, but laziness). This will not impact the reading experience or the simplicity of the website much. It is something that will help me be more organized and ideally improve the reading experience and the ability to share a single post with a friend will be simpler. This is what will be worked on. Something else that is on my mind, is how to grow the blog. If you know someone that would like it, please share it with them, feel free to tweet this out as well. Now perhaps you wish to keep this as your secret thing, that is also totally fine. It matters not how many people read it, but what matters is if people find value in what is written.

Thank you. For reading, for your thoughts and simply because I feel thankful for this thing I enjoy doing. Something that has allowed me to articulate my thoughts into something comprehendible to others.

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Striking Inspiration

When inspiration arises it is easy to push it aside, because of course busyness exists. Inspiration is abolustely beautiful, such a nice and wonderful thing as it allows things to happen that may not happen or that has activation energy to get started. Inspiration slices that activation energy by a significant amount, all that is needed is to drop everything and do it. Drop everything and be inspired, that is all that is required.

When considering inspiration, it is unreliable but it is something that occurs frequently enough that it can be utilized. Then a new trajectory is opened up, a new world. This is the beauty of inspiration, it simply arises and strikes. No need to rush or worry, just action. Their is no need to think, or overthink just 3 2 1 Go, that is the price of admission with inspiration, otherwise it simply rots like a month old carcass. It is stuck in the mind, dying and then lost, perhaps not forever but for a significant amount of time it doesn't exist.

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Out Of Practice

The ease of which things can fall out of practice is astronomical, it so easy to fall out of practice. The quality of work decreases, the ability to do decreases and the overall difficulty increases. This is all due to skipping a day or perhaps a few days. The difficulty increases, not because of a lack of effort or ability but simply due to a lack of practice.

Practice compounds on itself, so the more practice that is done the easier and better it is, folding onto itself and increasing as such. The issue with practice is that the opposite can be true as well, the lack of practice leads to a degradation of quality and a vast increase in the amount of effort required. This is why skipping a day, or a week or any amount of time if not absolutely necessary is fatal. Practice is essential for the growth of any ability but what is equally important is consistency.

Consistency allows practice to compound without it, no compounding really occurs, no growth can be seen because the data points are all scattered. The information that is getting back to the brain is not numerous. The data is the information that is gathered from practice, and without it practice is pretty worthless. The more practice that occurs the more data is available and the better that data is utilized. Thus stopping even for a day or two messes with that process, it ruins the consistency and ruins the habit of practice that is being built.

Not using we/I/our or any other pronouns is fucken difficult, this post feels so foreign .

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Chasing Perfection

Perfection is the fools endeavor, as something is perfect has no flaws but all things have flaws especially people. We want perfection because it allows us to feel this sense of control and accomplishment that otherwise wouldn't be felt. The high of perfection is great, because it means everything is within our control.

Perfection is typically coupled with this need to work impossibly hard, not because it is necessary but because it becomes craved. We become more and more addicted to trying to make everything perfect and to have complete control over situations that arise within our life. Now what happens when a situation is no longer within our control? We start to fight it, we try to quarrel it and try to come out on top. We must be perfect in order to exist. A fools dream, but completely understandable.

Some people seek food when things feel out of control, or working out or they clean. We try our best to gain some sense of control over the world around us, and that can be healthy. What is unhealthy is when we become obsessed with the need to control every little aspect around us, and aim for this whole being perfect. Failure and chaos is apart of life, it is something that must be accepted and allowed. To flow through the rapids and to give way when neccessary is essential to living a good life, otherwise we end up fighting all the rapids and won't have energy for when we see a waterfall and need to get to shore.

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Peace Of The Moment

The beauty of life can truly be understood once we stop moving away from the moment. The second we give up on trying to escape the current moment we are free in a whole new manner. No longer constrained by desires and longing for something other than what is to occur, that is freedom. Freedom is simple, but as we know through living our life, freedom is not that simple. Perhaps the problem is, is that we overcomplicate things, by trying to will them to be different.

We fail to accept that freedom is that simple, to be joyous is to be in the moment, because if we do we have to give up our desires. How could we ever give up our desires when we have spent so many years holding onto them and crafting them. Isn't that savagery? Perhaps that is why we fail to find the peace within every moment of our life, because we seek a better moment to replace the current moment. That isn't how it works though, this moment right now can't be anything other than what it is. The more connected to society we are the harder it is for us to forgo chasing a better moment, because we have attached so much value to instagram worthy moments.

When we were children we didn't seem to have this problem. We didn't have this idea of a better moment occurring during the current moment, because we were trying to grasp and understand everything in the current moment. We may have wanted things to be different, or to go play outside with our friends but we weren't trapped and consumed by that. We were too busy living to think about that for long. We didn't have that programming completely ingrained in us, but over time it has been ingrained in us. We became trapped chasing the gold at the end of rainbow, forgetting the fun and the beauty of the rainbow all together.

The moment hasn't changed, the moment is now. This is all there is to it, nothing can replace this moment, though who knows what the next moment holds.

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Mundane Greatness

When we start doing something new, we look at people who have been doing it for a few years and are amazed. We start working on our own projects and being proud of the accomplishments as we learn new things. Then we hit a point, a point where we have been doing something for awhile, we no longer feel that specialness of doing it. We no longer proud of the accomplishments, they have become mundane.

Our perspective is different now, we have made some accomplishments so when we do more things and learn more we take it for granted. It has become normalized, nothing special just another Thursday. This can be a huge problem because we can't appreciate the hard work we have put in and continue to put in.

From this point of view the great things becoming mundane seems normal, but it's also quite sad. We forget how hard it was and how much improvement we have gone through. When we consider that person who had been doing it for a few years, we are them. We turned into them, of course they have improved as well and that is the thing that seems to be forgotten. Time doesn't sit still, it is constantly moving forward. Our progress gets lost in that time, because it is extremely easy to down play hard work or progress because we are comparing ourselves to a future version of us instead of the past version of us that knew nothing and grew.

The great things that existed become mundane when compared to the future. That is a depressing thought, that we are turning our existence into nothing by comparison to other peoples accomplishment. The future.

Look at what was viewed as great when the project was started, and look at how what was great has become mundane and turned into nothing. We are giving up on enjoying the accomplishments we have achieved, and turning them into dust.

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Illusionary Mountains

It is easy to create mountains out of mole hills, it gives us an excuse not to do the things we know we should do. Consider the point right before we decide to start, we have built up this idea that starting and doing is very difficult and now we are staring at this massive mountain. It doesn't exist, but it is there as we have created a brain crack.

The longer we think about this idea, and think about starting the harder it may become. We create all these things of the perfect start and how much we need to prepare, forgetting that starting is the simple part. It just involves action. The problem is that we think about every possible thing we may need to do in 100 days or in 10 days with regards to starting. Now how can we possibly start knowing we have dedicated ourselves to 100 days of needing to know things. What do we end up doing? Simply refusing to start. If we don't start, we can't fail. If we don't start, we don't need to worry about the 100 days or 10. This idea is fundamentally flawed not just in the whole 100 days area but in the idea that we are married to this idea. We aren't stuck with working on this project for 100 days straight and we don't need the answers to those 100 days before we begin or right when we start. That is the illusion we create.

We have now created a mountain we need to climb, a mountain that doesn't exist. Taking away the idea of being able to turn around and everything. We have trapped ourselves into believing we must act and do, when we don't have to. The beginning is just about the first minute or the first day, it isn't about the ending or even the middle. It is about beginning and not falling for the trap our minds tend to create. We want to improve our life, not destroy things.

The longer something is put aside the larger the mountain that is created, the more thoughts are put into it. Playing out various perfect scenarios or perhaps playing out all the things that could or will go wrong. Creating this monstrous thing that we simply cant even begin to understand. How the hell are we expected to overcome that? We are creating a rift within our minds that stops us from being able to start. No one to blame but ourselves. The only way to break it, is to start. It is to begin and to keep going, with starting.

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We want detailed solutions to any problem that occurs. Give us a field guide on life, a solutions manual and most will be happy. How to do this or that, easy to follow and solve the problem. It is understandable, we have the belief that if we solve the problem our life would be better, logical as that is what we were taught. Solved problems = happy life.

We end up looking for solutions for everything in our life, we don't even consider the fact that we can simply just explore without whole searching thing. We aren't obligated to solve every little problem, because that makes us robots, we aren't robots though. The idea is to explore things and figure them out for ourselves, it isn't about getting someone elses answer and then applying it for ourselves.

That seems to be the problem though, we may desire to figure it out on our own, but we don't wish to put the time in. We want to sit and google a solution and apply it immediately, for somethings like how to put a toilet in, it makes sense. When it comes to questions about living and life, it is more personal. We can find inspiration in others answers or ideas from others but in the end we must explore it for ourselves. We must craft a map of our own world, as no one can enter our world and craft it for us. No other map will work. All the prescriptions we search for are mostly meaningless in our world, they do not draw out the complete picture, only portions but these portions aren't complete in the slightest and can't be completed as they are, because they aren't ours.

This is a thought that has been placed in my head by some dude on Twitter, or Clubhouse (forget his name), but it was really fucken dope. Been thinking about it for awhile.

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Stale Bread

Fresh bread is one of the most delicious things in the world, it has this texture and taste that is unmatched. It is absolutely the best (unless you have a gluten allergy, then it might be the worst). Now if we only ate stale bread, and we never tasted fresh bread then we may simply believe that bread sucks. That it is absolutely useless, and we may ask ourselves "why do people like this?". This mind state stays until we taste fresh bread. Then, then everything changes.

Our entire world is flipped upside down, and we may not be able to stomach stale bread ever again. We tasted something so fucken great, that we can't go back. We simply can't ever eat stale bread. We now expect or want fresh bread all the time.

Consider a person who lived a very unhappy life, but was consistently unhappy. They didn't know what happiness was, or what a fulfilling life was at all. Until one day, they met someone or did something, and things just clicked. They felt this taste of happiness, of fulfillment (realize happiness and fulfillment are not intwined), then they begin to feel the unhappiness or the lack of satisfaction in their life. They notice that they were eating stale bread. They can't go back to it, peacefully. They can't. They tasted the fresh bread.

Now you have a person who is striving to find fulfillment and improving their life because they notice how shitty things are. The awareness leads to things changing, for the ability for purposeful change to occur. We may not be able to be aware of it ourselves, but others may show us the taste of fresh bread. Now we are enlightented. Now we may live.

Once we look into the abyss, we can't pretend it doesn't exist.

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Riding Inspiration

Inspiration strikes at the oddest of times, sometimes at 2 in the morning other times in the middle of taking a shower. It simply strikes, and then a crossroad appears. We have a choice to make. Follow inspiration, or let it fall to the wayside, most of the time we believe that inspiration will last. We tell ourselves we will whatever it is later, or in the morning... Do we ever end up doing that thing?

How many days or months has it been since inspiration was followed and utilized? Some of us wait for inspiration to strike before beginning to do something, but then it strikes and then we do nothing. The problem is obvious, well their are two problems. The first problem is that we aren't utilizing inspiration and the second problem is that we are waiting for inspiration to do something.

Inspiration is fickle, it doesn't wait for us nor does it care what we do. It comes and it goes, whenever it wants, it is extremely fickle. When we feel it arising, we either need to grab at it and use it or discard of it completely. It can allow us to leap into something we thought we weren't ready for, or perhaps something we were afraid of. It pushes us into the world. It is a lovely thing when it is utilized, and an ugly thing when it is simply allowed to pass by.

The biggest issue is the waiting for inspiration to strike, mainly because it is like waiting for lighting to strike, we can't easily predict when or where it will strike. We are waiting and using that as an excuse not to do things. We are avoiding living, because we need to be inspired. Inspiration should simply be a gift, not a tool. It isn't something that can be relied upon as it comes and it goes whenever it wants. When it has arrived, one should be happy and use it, but when it isn't there, it shouldn't be waited for. We must continue to work on the things we care about, or want to do with or without inspiration. That is where we can build upon ourselves. Where we can grow, otherwise we are simply stuck playing the waiting game, and sometimes called the avoidance game. Avoiding action, so we can be 'happy' or comfortable.

It isn't about inspiration being bad or good, it simply is a thing that occurs. When it happens and it is useful, use it. If it doesn't happen, then don't wait for it. Don't use it as an excuse to not do the things that need to be done. Don't avoid. Ride inspiration, but don't be beholden to it.

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Finding The Wrong

When we consider what is wrong with ourselves, we seem to forget the world exists. That each and every person that lives has their own problems and deals with them daily. The real issue that may arise is that they and even ourselves may lack the awareness to find the things that are wrong or bad within us. It isn't that it doesn't exist, it simply means we aren't aware of it. This can happen for a number of reasons and the biggest one is that our bomb sniffing dog hasn't been trained.

How do we train our wrong sensing dog, and increase our awareness? Practice. It is simple as that, but we lack the patience for it. Whenever we notice something we must have the urge or simply explore what we noticed. Trying to grasp more of it and trying to understand it better. This will increase our awareness because as we are exploring we are becoming more aware of what is truly going on, what is wrong and what isn't. We are fine tuning and upping our awareness, confirming that it is useful and thus giving it a reason to be sharpened. We must use the thing, whatever the thing is in order for it be honed into a tool that we can utilize. Otherwise it withers away and dies, and that is what is happening to our attention, everytime we get distracted. It is withering and dying. We must not allow our awareness to go through the same thing. Practice, and explore.

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Rambling Into Genius

The importance of talking or writing perhaps with oneself or with others is that new ideas and concepts can form. We begin with a rudimentary understanding of something then that understanding increases as we try to explain something or think about something for longer. We end up stumbling on things we didn't know existed, we can then end up at an explanation that we didn't believe we were capable of.

This can be hard to do because it means we must be willing to be wrong, or to simply sound stupid in front of another. It is giving up on being perfect with our words and following the path that our mind magically lays out as we talk. This is a familiar concept when we consider what it really is. It is simply exploration, it is having the willingness to explore and seeing where that leads. That is what leads to us arriving at genius through rambling. Rambling is just exploration vocalized. It isn't about being right, but it is about being curious.

Ramble with those whom are friends, and allow the conversations to meld and flow into one another. This is where the genius lies. It is where it can be found and extracted, all through the fun of talking and exploring various topics. It isn't about crafting the best message, that simply just happens. It is simply exploration in action.

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Distractions Of The Mind

The mind is constantly looking for distractions and sometimes little blips come along where no thoughts are occurring or a better way to phrase is it, is that we are laser focused on the task at hand, and that is it's job. It is meant to constantly think, and the more free time one has, the more distractions it'll come up with for all sorts of things and during almost everything. We can not fault the mind for constantly looking for distractions, but we can perhaps fault ourselves.

We are constantly looking for reasons not to do things or not to focused and the mind is simply complying. As it builds up this ability to produce distractions during very difficult things, it begins to apply that to simple things that we are doing. We have created a flywheel, where as the mind creates distractions and we indulge them, it feels a greater obligation to create more distractions. We keep getting distracted over and over again, and not instantly refocusing our attention but indulging the distractions. We are accepting and fully aware of what is happening, but we aren't trying to really solve it. Simply complaining and leaving it at that.

If we cared, we would stop ourselves every time we noticed we were getting distracted, such as the time we picked up our phone when we were trying to do something, and then noticing we got distracted telling ourselves that within 3 minutes we will get back to work. Half an hour later, we finally get back to work. What can we expect? If all we ever do is indulge the distractions and allow them to rule over our life? We must exert some willpower and effort into refocusing our attention, and removing as many distractions as possible. That is key to improving our focus and keeping things going in the direction we want them to go in. Which is a focused direction.

As I was writing this, I went on my phone. Noticed I got distracted. Said 1 more minute. Then laughed. Then got back to writing. Welcome to distractions.

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When we consider most dreams we toss them aside as if they were nothing. We can always do that, assume that they are nothing...but... what if they hold something? Some type of meaning? This isn't to say dreams are showing you some alternate reality (though they could be), it is to say that it shows us the things that are occupying our mind or things we want.

If we have a dream that makes us feel stressed, shouldnt we ask ourselves what happened in the dream that caused us stress? Couldn't that provide a look into a problem that is happening in our life, that we simply overlooked or perhaps didn't even bother to look at? Or perhaps a dream is telling us what we want or a solution to a problem that we have.

Dreams don't make sense, and that is the beauty of them. They allow us to form connections we would fail to make in our waking life. The goal of reflecting or thinking about a dream isn't to figure out the total meaning of the dream, but to simply look at what occurred. Look at it for what it is could mean or what it was. Then see how that may be relevant to the life we lead. If it isn't relevant, well we can toss it out, if we want. The choice is ours. Not everything needs to mean something, and that is important. Things can be hints to something, or they can be nothing; simply a nightmare or a fun dream.

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The Art Of Observation

Thinking is something that happens all the time and when we were younger and perhaps even older we seemed to have done it for the sake of accomplishing some goal. We didn't bother to observe the thoughts, we tried to force and did whatever arose whilst of course fighting against it. That led to indecision within us, or poor decisions that affected us negatively, but we didn't think anything of it. Patterns arose that were harmful and they were simply followed blindly, without further thought or concern. Why? Because we weren't observing, we were simply thinking and doing, not truly there simply existing. That was our life.

Once we bring in observation, we start noticing patterns, we start noticing and seeing thoughts. We are coming to life in terms of actually living. We are becoming aware, not just going through the motions, but actually observing ourselves doing the actions, and then perhaps questions start to pop up. These questions lead us to explore a new avenue of thinking, and this in turn gives us a greater pool of choice. We now have options as things are happening. We are no longer stuck in the patterns we dug ourselves into, or the loop of thoughts we are in. The possibility of breaking free from those things greatly increases and life becomes a lot freer.

Observation is not easy, nor is it something most of us are inherently good at it. It is something that must be cultivated overtime, and involves increasing our awareness or at least having someone help with it. It needs to be continuously cultivated, and that is what makes it beautiful and what what makes it an art form. Patience, practice and time. That is what is required. That is the cost of observation, and with observation must come action. As without action nothing changes, though the fact that something has been observed inherently changes it.

Does a tree fall if no one is around to hear it?

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Breaking Gems

The best time to start exploring the pains and the spirit is during peacetime. When we think about ourselves as human beings, but better yet as simply another thing we can start seeing the flaws within us. The pain we hold onto, the gems of anger or hatred that formed within us that have gone unnoticed for a long period of time, because we thought we dealt with them or left them behind. Once we start searching for what is going within us, these things may begin to appear(once awareness is high enough) and we realize how many things are hidden away.

Two choices arise, the choice to hide that poisonous gem or to try to tease it apart and shatter it, thus freeing all the pain or anger or hate. Hiding it seems like the cowards way out, and it is but it is also logical, facing the hate/pain is well painful, it is not easy so when we decide to hide it deeper within us we are really trying to protect ourselves. Here is the thing though, once something has surfaced it must be faced. We can't avoid what we are aware of.

Now we may be left with one choice, which is to tease apart the this emotional coil and to hopefully free it, therefore freeing ourselves. This is not easy, sounds easy, but it isn't. The pain that can be felt from this exploration is high and the attempt to free things up and release the coil can bring up memories but this is why we do it during peacetime. During peacetime we can solely focus on bettering ourselves inside and out, we have no war to fight. We can pick and choose our battles, 10 minutes of coil breaking, then a days break, then perhaps trying to understand it. That is the process. It is not easy and it does take time. That is why the best time to do it is peacetime, the second best time is during wartime. The thing with wartime is when things are already shitty why not try to solve more things, because it can't get too much shitter (a very dangerous way to live, but sometimes it works out)

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Before You're Ready

Thinking is a beautiful thing, we can craft such amazing ideas and even better than that we can imagine things that don't exist and bring them forth into existence. That is a gift unlike any other, but like most gifts their is a drawback. We forget to start, we contemplate every angle, we think about every little detail and try to research as much as possible, all in the hope of trying to be prepared.

Trying to be prepared is a sound strategy, it is logical and that is why it falls short. We can prepare, but we tend to over prepare, losing sight of the starting line and never reaching it. We must be willing to start the project before we are ready, so that way we can learn as we go. This allows us to focus on what is actually important and not what we believe is important. Those two things may lineup every once and awhile but they tend not to lineup very often.

The second we start something we are being fed information, we are getting a vast amount of data from starting and most of this data goes unnoticed, but what is important is what is getting noticed. The data we gain from starting before we are ready allows us to redirect our focus or attention to what is necessary. This stops us from wasting energy on things we thought were important but were really secondary to something else, and thus we can actualize the project. We aren't stuck.

Being stuck is the result of overthinking and trying to prepare for every possible scenario, we can't possibly do that! Therefore we just giveup, the thing we wanted to work on simply fades away and is forgotten. Just like that, until years later we see something that sparks that idea, or perhaps someone else has done it...

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Peacetime Warfare

Wartime means gametime, requiring our 100% effort and focus. We can't fuck about, or be lazy because that will get us killed or get us hurt. When we are at war, we are fully present, at least as present as we can be, but of course we aren't at war all the time. Most of the time we are at peacetime. Peacetime is the best, we can relax, we can be lazy and generally life is pretty good. We let ourselves go in peacetime. The thing about time is that it is always changing, peacetime can turn into wartime in an instant, and then we must be ready or we will get knocked down some pegs, perhaps even hitting rock bottom.

The problem with us, is that we forget that peacetime ends, that war is always right their, waiting. Most of us will have struggles in life that reappear, things that bug us or annoy us. Things that crush our spirit, they may be frequent or they may be rare, but they do happen and most of the time it is unexpected. Sometimes it is expected but we are still in the peacetime mode, we aren't even thinking about war. Just smelling some tulips and kissing some lady bugs. Then bang. War. Bang, the first hit comes and we are reeling back trying to piece together how we ended up in this position. How did we get so broken so quickly? Peacetime. That is how.

Consider peacetime as prep time, but prepping seems to be tedious and hard work. Peacetime is meant to relax, as we just went through this whole new ordeal, so why should we keep acting like wartime? Fuck no, who wants live like that? But it doesn't mean we should sit around twiddling our thumbs. Peacetime is the best time to grow and develop our skills and abilities to fight wars, fight the struggles we go through. We have the time and the energy to build ourselves, and solidify our life. We aren't stuck in battle. We can work on things to better our lives and better our world. We aren't stuck. We can prepare for war, and we can prepare to face the struggles. Shoring up our shores (hahaha). That is the best thing to do, during peacetime. Continue prepping for war, and enjoying the moments of peace. We can make so much progress. We can grow so quickly. What is stopping us? Just ourselves. We are holding back our progress, our ability to grow because we chose to make the assumption that peace will last forever, when it never has. It has never lived for ever. Though it is cute, that we hold the belief that peace will last forever, and it can but only by preparing for war. We can find peace within the wartime.

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Exploration vs Letting Go

When we consider the idea of letting go, we have now created a goal. The goal is to let go, of whatever is holding us back or bugging us. We are transforming the act of being free, to the art of goals, setting up timelines and how we want to go about letting go of something. When we really consider 'letting go' what is actually happening is a greater attachment is forming. We are getting sucked into the thing more and more because of this whole desiring to let it go. We are causing the thing to persist for longer and perhaps even making it harder at the same time. What about when we think of the word exploration?

To explore simply means their is no destination, it can't have a goal. It is simply a journey, to where? Who knows. That is the point. It is about living and growing, less about letting go (though that does happen) and more about having fun with the things in our life than to solve a specific problem. Typically the problem then ends up being solved, not by force but by curiosity. If we think about exploration and the art of goal setting, we can easily start trying to set the goal to explore more, but that sorta defeats the purpose. Same with letting go.

The idea is to not set a destination, but to explore the paths laid out in front of us or beside us. It is about living a life, and not trying to 'solve' life, as if life is some mathematical problem. It very well could be, but that doesn't help us live a more fulfilled life nor a happier one. So why bother? Just explore.

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Walking Into Fear

When we move around and live our lives we consider the things that make us uncomfortable to be bad. We consider them things to be avoided, which makes sense, who wants to feel nervous or scared or uncomfortable? Sadist. Or perhaps someone who has learned that the unknown, the uncomfortableness or fear is something of a guide. It provides a direction to head in, but it depends on the type of fear. Is it fearing jumping off a cliff to our deaths or just the fear of possibly sucking at something or being embarrassed? These are different types of fears. We have been raised to believe that all fear is equal, that it all should be avoided and is bad, but what if, what if it isn't? If all fear is not equal, but simply different from one another.

If we take fear of being embarrassed (ie when we are learning a skill and we are bad at it) it is a great guide, a great teacher. It means we should pursue the fear and make it known, and thus no longer be afraid. We can conquer it, by simply being with it. This fear is a great growth tool, it means that we have a direction to go in, a direction to pursue. We are being guided. Now we may be still afraid to do it, but what if we took the approach of just being curious about it. Poking at the fear, and trying to get a little deeper into it. Wouldn't we learn more about it? We would become more acquainted with it, and thus less afraid (for the most part).

Fear is an excellent guide, it gives a person a direction to go in. It gives us something to explore, and that is honestly a beautiful thing. When we listen to fear, and don't avoid it we can grow leaps and bounds. Afraid of social interactions? Cool, now a direction has been created and we can slowly work towards it. Afraid of a lack of control? Cool, we have a direction. We can work on trying to be okay with not being in control because fun fact, we are rarely in control of anything. We can work on these things.

With all of our emotions and thoughts, they provide us with a direction. If we feel uncomfortable in a restaurants, it means we simply lack experience in being in them. So what can we do? We can start going to restaurants and becoming comfortable with how it works, making the unknown into the known. The kicker here is, once you start getting COMFORTABLE with the UNCOMFORTABLE, it becomes EASIER. In the beginning it will be hard, very difficult and then it becomes easier. This applies to most things. The act of doing, leads to an easier time doing. So work on something, and just slowly start chipping away at it. Remember that things that are avoided only get harder as time goes on - like tossing something in quicksand. The best time is now. Of course, this is easier written and read than done, but that is why we have people in our lives we can lean on. We can trust to help us.

A war is not fought alone. A war is fought with many. Some battles must be fought alone, but not all. Learn to recognize the difference, then reach out (and touch the sky (fun reference)).

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Changing For Control

Watch. Observe the self, that is doing the things it is doing. When we have awareness, we seem to be able to see more. We can see what truly lies beneath our feet, not the ground we wish to below but wooden planks, and then realization that we are simply drifting on the wide open sea. The beliefs we held about this solid ground, this knowing where we are, gone. Simply gone. When we take the time to be aware of our life and what is happening, we can see things for what they are and not what they pretend to be. Or more accurately what we pretend they are.

Consider change. When we want to change something, do we actually want to change the thing? Or are we simply looking for a war to control our life, or situation. A quick easy way to exert control is to change something in our surroundings, or something about ourselves. Superficial change, like cutting our hair short or getting a tattoo that really symbolizes nothing, but we make it symbolize something. All to justify our actions, we grow to love the new thing because we did it. We made the choice. We were in control. These thoughts on change, appear quickly. They alter themselves so we have 5 different things we want to change all superficial. Do we question why these thoughts occur? What purpose they serve? Or do we follow them like a dog to food, or a human to food (hahahaha)?

The second we start questioning or looking for the pattern, we can find it (usually). We learn that the reason we are doing a thing, isn't because we like or love the thing, but because we want to exert control over a situation. We want solid ground under our feet, we want to create the belief that we can make the planks of the ship into concrete or perhaps dirt and that we aren't drifting aimlessly at sea. That we have a purpose. We have control, so we reach out in whatever way we can to make it so. We need to know, need being a very louse to term for want to know. We want to know what is happening around us, and that isn't enough. Not even close. We then have to be able to manipulate and control everything around us, so we can feel safe.

The belief that having control, makes us safe, or the opposite is also true, that having no control means we can't make wrong decisions. It all comes down to living in illusions and trying to avoid being on a ship at sea, with no motor and only some sails waiting to catch a breeze.

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Scale Of Progress

When we consider consistency and the importance of it, we know it is useful and should be considered in nearly every endeavor, it gives us more at bats. More chances to improve and to grow, but we can not understand this at a level where it simply clicks. We can intellectually understand that doing things more can lead to better results, but we can't understand it at a fundamental level.

This can stop us from being consistent, as we believe their is no point. We can't see the progress, so therefore no progress is being made. The idea of seeing visible results in the future is an illusion, if we consider the future, it doesn't exist. It is just something invisible, this is why most humans suck at things that relate to the future, and fail to improve their own wellbeing. We can't maintain consistency unless we see some tangible result, take writing for example, we can see that their are more words being written but what really hits it home is having the total number of words written. Better yet, how long it takes us to scroll to the bottom of the text document, or the page. That shows us progress, clear as day (or at least the resolution of your device...). This too has a problem, it requires time to see the results.

This is where data can be useful. If we were to track as many touch points as possible, or as many measurements as possible and then have a visual graph or way to view the change, we can see the difference between us from a week ago vs us now, or us from a month ago to now. We can see all the tiny little details that are missed by our smooth brains (this is a joke, laugh a little). We can't easily understand that taking 10 milliseconds of 100m dash is a huge deal, or even 3. We can't fathom it, but we can see the time go down. The trend that we have gotten faster, and are continuously getting faster. The goal with more data points is to see the trends. Imagine this for working out, if we collected our waist circumference, our weight, our bicep circumference, and other regions we can then see what is happening. The actual trends of our working everyday. We may not be losing weight, but the weight is distributed differently now. That allows us to actually understand that exercising is WORKING. That things are happening, and not just hoping.

Our goal should be to length the scale we are using to measure, wether that means zooming in a lot or zooming out a lot. We want to be able to see the trends that are arising.

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Energy Of Creation

When we create things with our hands or our minds and bring we are branding our souls into it. If we are mindful, carefully crafting something precious, even if it turns out to be pretty ugly. It is being crafted by us and that in itself makes it precious. We are feeding energy into something that has no energy inherently.

When a sculpture looks at a piece of clay or marble, they see what that thing needs to be, they see what it should be. When a person who doesn't create or who doesn't work with that material sees it, they may see a replica of something they have seen before or they may see nothing. The whole idea of something coming out of nothing is ludicrous to them. They can't fathom anything being shaped out of a lump of clay. They lack the ability to see what is possible, of course once they see it, once they do it, it lives within them. They can see.

Creation is interesting like that. The beauty of it is the fact that when we create something out of nothing, we are putting energy into the thing, giving it a part of ourselves but in exchange we are gaining a part of it. We gain something immeasurable from crafting, from creating. When a painter has been slaving over a piece for hours on end, and they finally complete it, they don't feel broken or incomplete. Quite the opposite. They feel totally complete, as if the world makes sense, and the energy of it all is within them and the piece. That is all their is to it. Nothing else matters, not the tiredness of their bones or the way their hand shakes or even the hunger they are feeling.

That is what is beautiful about creation, it is completing something that most didn't know needed to be completed but once they set their eyes on it, they can sort of feel it. The energy and life within the piece of nothing, that is something.

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Shared & Executed

As we open up to the world and as we tell the people we care about things that interest us or the things we do we acutely become aware of the fact of if they care or if they are simply listening for the sake of wanting to talk or to share their words. It is more than just that, it is if they truly look into what you said, was a show mentioned that is worth watching or a podcast or even more precious a book that that was simply mind boggling? Was the other person truly invested in what was being said and by whom it was being said by? Or was it barely acknowledged?

These are the questions that arise when we think about what we shared with those we care about, they may not arise consciously as they may just arise as some sort of feeling. We can easily be dragged into this, wether the other person cares or not, or whether they want to be invested into things but is that important. Isn't that somewhat selfish? When we share our joy with others shouldn't it be done without conditions? Without worrying about if they truly care or not, as we are the ones who care and thus we we shared.

Giving without wanting some kind of attention or acknowledgement, simply giving our energy because we have so much of it. This doesn't mean tell the world everything and expect nothing, it simply means that for the most part it doesn't matter. We are creating mountains out of mole hills. Most of the time what we really mess up on is turning mountains into mole hills, and thus a abusive relationship may occur. It is when we make small things big, that we are being selfish.

Being selfish with our attention/energy and what we care about is worth doing, it is worth considering, but it is not worth agonizing over. If that is occurring then the question may lie within ourselves. What is going that we expect something in return for every little action we take?

Perhaps what is needed is a greater level of awareness, where we question why we are sharing something, why we are telling someone something. Is it for acknowledgement, attention or simply because we wish to share something important with someone we care about? Regardless of if they watch or do the thing, we are simply sharing for the sake of sharing.

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Pathways Of Choice

When we think about choice and the life we lead, we can come to believe that things are fixed. That the past is the future and we have no influence on it. Esoterically that may be true, we may not have any influence over the future but consider the life we lead. The past is fixed, it has occurred and it is over. Now we are at this moment, this moment where you, the reader are reading this, now the future is blank. It is influenced by the past, but it is not defined by the past. We have choices.

Our past as if it is engraved into stone, but the future is simply gravel, we can engrave our own path. We can shift the gravel to what we want the future to look like, we have an unlimited amount of paths to pick and we can decide which one suits us. It is not set in stone! That is important to remember, that we can shift the sands to the manner in which we want things to be. The past is done, but the future is clear.

Now the future is being built in the present, we influence the future in all of our current actions. We can decide to workout, thus making it easier to workout the next day, we can decide to pick up some garbage in front of us and toss it out or we can walk away from it. We can make the actions easier in the future or harder, all by choices made today. This is how the past influences the future. It does not define the future, but simply influences it. When we recognize this fact, we can start manipulating(or a more 'positive' word) our decisions and choices thus crafting a future we want. The real issue is knowing what we want, but perhaps just having a direction is useful.

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Making The Choice

When we think of the choices we make, we are never sure if they are the 'right' ones but we make them all the same. Sometimes we avoid making any choice at all, but that is also a choice. So in the end we do decide on a choice, wether we wish to or not. We decide on something.

Most of the time we may be displeased in being forced to decide, or make a choice and we don't feel like it was the right choice because we can't parse apart our emotions or thoughts very well so we are all mixed up. Now think about a choice that was made that cleared up everything, that perhaps stopped emotional turmoil and allowed for a good nights rest. That choice, was the right choice because everything responded so well to it, the war within ourselves stopped. It was no longer raging, and thus we were able to return back to calm. This is making the right choice. Now the issue that arises is some choices don't easily allow things to be clear. We can't easily tell what is happening within us, or the war is only a tiny battle and we think nothing of it. A bunch of tiny battles can turn into a war though, can't they?

When we lack the awareness to know how our choices are impacting us or lack thereof then we can't make a truly wise decision. This is why it is so important to increase our self awareness and to get better at parsing things apart. Then we can truly understand what is happening, the signs that are occurring. Consider the book "The Alchemist", in their it talks about listening to the world and how the world speaks to our hearts, until we stop listening. Then our heart stops speaking. Then we can't understand the world around us anymore. When we make a decision or a choice, listen to what is occurring within, and use that as a guide.

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Higher Peaks, Deeper Valleys

When we think about the emotions we feel and the things we go through in life, we seem to think that bad things are just bad. That they can't possibly hold any value, or that the amount of bad can not equate to the amount of good that can come out of something, but isn't that false? Consider our highs, the higher the high the greater the fall, we enter deeper valleys when we go super higher. It seems to be some unwritten rule, or perhaps it was written long ago.

Consider children for a second, how they are happy and live so freely. They don't think much of the past, or the future but simply live in the moment joyously. Do they feel the deepness of the beauty around them? Or the happiness of something so simple and pure like a sunset or a childs smile? They can't, not because of a lack of effort but because they haven't felt the valleys. They haven't had sadness hit them, or pain, they have only ever lived in the moment (which is a beautiful thing), but they don't have a comparison to make.

That seems to be the key though, having a comparison. We as human beings compare things to other things, we compare moments to other moments thus tainting them. This can be positive when we compare a bad moment, to a great moment or toxic when we compare a great moment to a terrible moment. We amplify the ends of our experience, meaning we create higher peaks, and lower valleys by default. Perhaps this allows uis to live a richer experience, what most children can not live, but it could also be holding us back from enjoying all moments, all the random ones that hold no value, or so we think.

It isn't clear whether we need negative experiences to provide a fuller and whole picture of a positive experience, but it sure does help.

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Wishful Suffering

Wishful thinking is wasteful thinking, at least for the most part. When we wish for something we really have given up trying, we have given up on working towards the goal and simply wish that the goal will sort itself out. The goal being the thing we are thinking about. It isn't that we no longer care, we still do, it is simply that we are no longer putting in the effort to achieve our goal.

When this happens we continue to suffer, and we continue to erode our mental state because we wish something will change, but haven't let go of the thing or perhaps we aren't even trying to get the thing, but still wish and long for it. Wishful thinking, doesn't help us. It is different from dreaming, having dreams is wonderful as they allow us to explore the world around us and think beyond the box, whereas wishful thinking isn't exploration but simply a desire for something. A deep desire. No action is taken. No letting go. Just straight up desiring.

Wishful thinking doesn't allow us to fulfill our desires but only increase them. We are stuck still longing for the thing, yet stuck in place, feet cemented into the ground, not by another but by ourselves. We are bringing upon our own misery, don't we then desire to be miserable? We continue to wish, thus we continue to desire. It is all on us, we could easily begin to move towards our wishes and desires if we so chose to, but we don't we sit and we wish. We sit and we wish, yet our expectations are still extremely high.

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Good Luck, Bad Luck

This post is a story that is incredible, and that will be the post for today.

There is a story of a farmer who used an old horse to till his fields.

One day, the horse escaped into the hills. When the farmer’s neighbors sympathized with the old man over his bad luck, the farmer replied, “Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?”

A week later, the horse returned with a herd of horses from the hills. This time the neighbors congratulated the farmer on his good luck. His reply was “Good luck? Bad luck? Who knows?”

Then when the farmer’s son was attempting to tame one of the wild horses, he fell off its back and broke his leg. Everyone thought this was very bad luck. The farmer’s reaction: “Bad luck? Good luck? Who knows?”

Some weeks later, the army marched into the village and conscripted every able-bodied youth they found there. When they saw the farmer’s son with his broken leg, they let him off.

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Changing Withe The Times

Human beings are extremely adaptable, we can adapt to any environment and learn almost anything yet we struggle to change when the world changes. Perhaps it is an age thing, as the saying goes it's hard to teach an old dog new tricks but is that saying simply an excuse to be lazy? To simply give up and never change again?

If we think about change and the life we lead we can come to some quick conclusions. We like change when we command it, when we are the causers and controllers of it. We hate change when the world around us changes or someone else is forcing us to change. Then it isn't that the old dog can't learn new tricks, it's that it doesn't want to as it's no longer wanting the world to mold it. It wants to mold the world.

Change isn't about things being different, it is about control as many things are. We can either allow the world to shift (as it will no matter how we act) and we can shift with it, or we can be dragged kicking and screaming (completely in control). As we age we tend to go with the latter as it feels like we have some control, even if it is an illusion. The change will still occur, and we can be happy for it or we can be a frustrated child. The hardest thing about change is allowing ourselves to change, is giving up that control and flowing with the world. Not simply against it.

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Feeling Lonely

The feeling of loneliness or simply the feeling of being alone occur within most people, not all people but most people. When this feeling arises we automatically associate it with being alone, that it is us vs the world and that no one is around us. This may be the case for some of us but for most of us, that is far from the truth. We have people who care about us, and people who are our friends. So the question is, where does the issue truly lie in?

It is something crafted by the mind, to deceive us. More accurately it is something we are confused about. We assume that the feeling of loneliness has a causal relationship with being alone. It may be the case that at times when we are alone we feel lonely, but that does not make it have a casual relationship where they directly influence one another. We like to believe they do because that simplifies the situation, be surrounded by people constantly, jump from relationship to relationship = no more loneliness.... Doesn't seem to work that way though, those are ways to alleviate the feelings of loneliness but they do not solve them.

If we consider the feeling of loneliness, perhaps it is simply that we feel we aren't being heard in our social circles or that we want deeper connections with those we do speak to? Or the craziest of all explanations is that it is just a feeling. The feeling of loneliness, does not mean we are alone and that we are lacking friends, it simply means that a feeling arose and we interrupted it in a certain way. We took the feeling and turned it into loneliness and defined it as bad. Therefore we created our own suffering, nothing was bad until we made it so. This is a very deep conditioning for most of us, so that may simply not be enough to solve the problem but it is a start. It gets us curious about the feelings we are feeling and what they really mean. They may just be happening randomly and so if we place no weight on the feelings then aren't we free of them? No longer lonely?

A different way we can view this all is to simply allow ourselves to feel the emotion we named loneliness and just be lonely for a bit, and know that it isn't reality. Let it be felt. Let it be acknowledged. Then let go. Or perhaps that is crazy talk and we really are lonely, and alone - craft your reality wisely.

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Constant Effort

Regression is occurring all the time, with everything. We simply don't notice it because we are inherently working against it, by the means of going to the gym or studying or perhaps therapy. When we stop working on ourselves or the things we care about we begin to regress and thus our ability to do said thing decreases. It may not decrease by a lot for things that we have been doing all of our lives, but it will decrease a lot for the things that we are just starting to learn. The things we are starting to put in effort towards.

Our goal is to progress and this involves applying effort constantly until it becomes nearly frictionless. Then we can stop flooring the gas pedal and we can allow ourselves to go at a steady pace. Gathering some easy wins here and there before flooring it again. This allows us to have a bit of rest as we go about our pursuits. Where we seem to fuck up at is that once we get going we seem to take the foot completely off the gas pedal, and then that thing that felt nearly frictionless, no longer feels that way. Their is a ton of friction all at once. We begin to struggle to pick back up where we left off, instead we noticed some degradation but worse than that it is now harder to start back up.

Constant effort is required. We can't take the foot off the gas pedal, we can't coast on whatever thing we are doing, the only thing we can do is ease off the gas pedal. We must stick to our word, not for others but for ourselves when we decide we want to make something a priority. This means we will be consistent, we constantly work at it, simply slowing down but no permanent break.
If we take the idea of meditation or therapy both of these things have to do with increasing ones awareness of what is and the reality that is being experienced. When we stop doing them we must substitute them for another way to increase our awareness or at least keep it study. Giving us time and the ability to simply be aware of the existence we lead.

Consistency is only required until the thing has sunk into our bones and our spirit, until it is us. Then we can be more playful with the thing. We can relax a bit more as we are the living embodiment of the thing.

Read this post from Tinkered Thinking Natural Spring

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Truth Of The Self

When we talk about the truth what most of us mean is we don't want to tell others lies. We don't want to lie to others, but what about if the truth is more than just the words we speak. When we think about truth it is more than just the words, it is more than the actions. The truth is about everything, not to the world but to ourselves.
When we look into ourselves or when we write or do anything it is us about that. That is where the truth matters, it matters when it comes to ourselves. If we are seeking truth it means bringing light to all the darkness, to all the corners. We must expose ourselves to every aspect of us. Not for others, but for ourselves. That is what it means to seek out truth. Looking into ourselves can be done in any number of ways and the method doesn't matter, what matters is how much we are hiding from ourselves.

The more things we are hiding from ourselves, the more we are lying to ourselves and the harder it becomes to find the truth, whatever that may be. We must constantly increase our awareness and ability to tell the truth and seek the truth within ourselves. Expose ourselves to the truth at every turn.

The real kicker with the truth is, is that we hold it back. We hold onto a version of ourselves and thus do not allow the truth to be exposed, not even to ourselves. We don't want to be frauds so we avoid the truth. This is about living in the illusion of who we want to be to the world. We hide behind things, so we aren't exposed. The problem with speaking the truth and not hiding it from ourselves is that it can destabilize who we believe we are, but this is more of an opportunity than a problem. It allows us to build a foundation that won't be easily shattered as it is based on our truth, not other peoples truth.

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Such A Shame

Whenever something occurs we stick a label on it, this is good and that is bad. We stick the label and then build our world around that label.

When an emotion arises the first thing we do is stick a label on it, this is good or this is bad. Then what we do is we start building our entire world around it. We begin to have thoughts that confirm to the label, we begin to view things as that label. We strip the emotion or thoughts that contradict the label and we are left with what we want to believe, left with the label, good or bad. This manner of thinking and feeling is completely normal, we don't even think that it is bad in the slightest (see that label being placed).

If we try to shift the label and our thinking about a thing over to a different label or just try to strip away the label we are met with a high level of resistance because it is going against what we have been trained to do our entire life. We get a label, we stick the label on the thing, and then we are done. A blue pen, is always a blue pen. Expect when it isn't. Our brains are genius at label making, we craft labels for everything and then wonder why we are stuck with the same perspective. Stuck in the same manner of thinking.

When we strip away the label we can explore all the various options that exist, things can ebb and flow to where they need to. An emotion that started off negative is now a positive, because we may have learned a new fact or we may have realized that this 'negative' emotion is a teaching tool to better improve ourselves. Does that make the initial emotion good or bad? It's simple really. When we don't have a label it does involve a lot more thinking and energy, but it is so much easier than being stuck in the same little path that leads us to misery.

Labels are meant to be replaced, and updated constantly as new information comes. Yet to be stuck with a single label, is what most of us are doing. We hold on tightly to that label and hope that by holding onto it we will be happy.

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What Is Wanted

If we don't know what we want in life, are we stuck? If we fail to know the direction we want our life to go in, are we just wondering around aimlessly? Doing things, seamlessly without purpose, but trying to fit meaning onto things. Trying to force a purpose to arise and to tell ourselves that we are doing x because of y, but we simply be doing x because it feels like that is what we are supposed to do. What happens when we gave up what we are supposed to do, and are left holding an empty bag?

This is something not many people bother to think about, probably for good reason. Who wants to think about what they want out life, or the fact that they don't really know why they do the things they do. Consider the idea of school or a job, why do we do it? For a number of reasons, we believe that it is the right thing to do because society told us that, why do we date? Same reason, but most relationships aren't built on much. The thing is, is that we chase all these things that really hold no meaning, but we were told we need. This gives us a false sense of purpose, and that may simply be better than no purpose. The issue with a false sense of purpose comes later, after many years one realizes 'ah I didn't care about that, what have I do all my life' whereas the person with no purpose searching for one may stumble upon it and then look back at all the various experiences they have had as having purpose.

If we take the idea of finding purpose, we come up with the question of how. How do we find our purpose and live a fulfilling life? From everything the internet says it involves doing a lot of different stuff in the hopes that we stumble across it. Seems like a better idea than doing nothing.

Sometimes we have a general idea of what we want in life, based upon how we feel and what we think, but as we know that can change. Let's assume that it doesn't change, would settle for less than the best in order to achieve our goals? This is prevalent in many areas of life, we accept what we are given but we don't try to push to what we believe we deserve. This all relies on what we think we deserve or what we want.

If we want a deep connection with another person does that mean we try to force or make something arise with people we meet? Or does it mean that we should look for it in already existing relationships we have, and attempt to elevate them? Or perhaps the best we can do is help others and live life in the hopes that a magical connection appears, and if it does perhaps we have missed our chance.

In the end it perhaps it all comes down to doing, doing more, exploring more and just being curious. Letting life unfold in front of us in whichever manner it desires.

It is hard to know what the right action is, and to figure out what the best result would be from the action. Sometimes we think we are doing the right thing, but it isn't the right thing. Does that mean we should dwell on the past? Or try to let go and move to the future, trying our best to learn from the mistakes?

Alas I am not sure.

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Reframed Perspectives

When we think about the problems in our life or the things that are happening we focus on the direction that we are facing. We don't look around, we don't contemplate various options, we have blinders on. We see what our first reaction was to the situation and continue to hold onto that. We look at the problem with the same eyes.

That lacks helpfulness because it simply states what is happening, for some that is enough but for others it isn't. We, the creators of the problem can not solve the problem, at least for the most part. This means that if we hold a perspective, it is difficult for us to switch perspectives or see the thing in a different light. We typically get stuck in a loop, where we search for another perspective and return to the original perspective, rinse and repeat. We can't help it, because that is what we know, we do what we know until we know something else. Knowing something else isn't a matter of bashing our heads into a wall or trying to be clever about it, it is about something just clicking this may occur due to someone mentioning something or just by random chance. It can not be forced (doesn't stop me from trying to force it HAHAHAH).

What can really help is getting a second opinion an outside perspective from someone who isn't you. Once we get an outside perspective they can help us reframe the entire problem in a way that we never could have conceived. This isn't because we are dumb, it is because we have blinders on, we started with a direction and ran with it. With this reframed perspective we must realize it isn't reinforced, it has simply been expressed and perhaps somewhat accepted. The important thing to remember is that the previous perspective that was kept and repeated still exists and the brain has become familiar with that pathway thus will still gravitate towards it.

If this reframed perspective is helpful then we must do our part to hold onto it and to reinforce it whenever we notice things going astray. In this manner we must also acknowledge that other perspectives exist. Don't put on blinders for this new perspective. Keep things fluid. Loose.

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How can we know if a risk is worth taking? Can we calculate the positives vs the negatives of a risk for things in our life, or do we simply need to take a leap of faith and hope for the best? Perhaps that is why having skin in the game is so important, when we take a risk we are giving ourselves the possibility of great upside. We are directly involved in the risk and thus have an advantage of that risk paying off.

Unnecessary risk is of course something we should avoid and this comes down to what can be gained from taking this risk. Does the risk lead us to possibly living a better life? Or a more negative one? Short term or long term? These things matter a lot, short term pain for long term gain is definitely worth it. Long term pain for short term pleasure is not. Simple to type out or to read but very difficult to put into practice. Then perhaps the question that is important is how much do we want it? If we want the thing a lot we would be willing to accept the risk in the chance that things work out the way we want, but if we don't we simply remain at the status que, which is not bad but it may not be good.

The choice is still not clear, but now their is a rough framework of possibilities. The more we want something the stronger we will try to will it into existence and thus be willing to take the risk and possibly lose. Then their is the idea of accepting what is, and not assuming the risk and putting no skin in the game. Is that wrong? Not at all, it is hard to try to do something different, and sometimes painful. To keep things the same and not to risk anything is sometimes easier in the short term but as time goes on it can hinder us in the long term as we may simply end up having regrets (as has been said many times before, regrets are a killer).

The question we are left with is, to risk or not to risk.

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Honest Feedback

Sometimes providing honest feedback isn't the best idea, but in application it is important. When we communicate with another honestly it leaves the air clear, no one misunderstands and people can continue with their own business. The issue with this is that it is very difficult at times.

It is difficult to hurt anothers feelings by being brutally honest, or to put yourself out there and be completely vulnerable. Overall the risk can be high, but the rewards are even higher. When we lie we leave ourselves open to being caught, open to all trust being broken and the feelings of being betrayed to appear. That is an extremely high cost for not telling the truth. We must continuously be honest even if it is uncomfortable. Even if it is unpleasant because one lie can taint all the truth one has ever spoken.

We have to provide honest feedback otherwise it taints any compliment we provide to another. In the back of the other persons mind they will always question is this person telling the truth, because people lie and they have lied. That is the cost of the lie. Honesty has high upfront costs but low costs in the long haul. Pick wisely.

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Freaky Friday

We sometimes believe that we want to switch lives with others, people who live 'better' lives but we never think of things past that. We feel the envy, we feel the lust for the best parts from other peoples lives but do we take a moment to think of all the bad that in that persons life?

We have the belief that others live lives of just unbelievable prosperity and joy, that it is impossible for them to feel suffering or to feel sadness/pain. This creates an illusion that we live a life of suffering and others are prospering all the time, and that creates the problem of envy. We begin to envy others and what they have, but would we want to take their pain? Living their entire life? Now some may say yes and if we take it a step further if we gave up our lives in exchange for their life it means we will lose all our experiences. We will lose the friendships that were made, the hardships we have overcome, everything in exchange for this other persons life. A life we barely have understanding of.

When we feel envious of others and the way they live their lives, we should ask ourselves if we would like to forget everything about our lives, all the things we held precious and take on the pain of this other person. We would also take on their wins but we would not be conditioned to live with their pain, we wouldn't know their memories or their life. But we would have given up all of ours. When we feel envious of another, we should contemplate the costs of switching lives.

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A Controlled Spiral

When things get tough, clean or reorganize. This is a simple way to create a sense of security within ourselves, it is within our control and it is easy. This is why a lot of people like cleaning their homes, it makes them feel at peace because they have complete control. When life begins to spiral, it is good to simply clean and reorganize things that are around us, it makes things that feel mushy into solids.

This concept can be taken one step further, we can take the tasks that we wish to do and write them onto que cards. This breaks our mental cycle of 'OH I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO' into something tangible. We can see what we really have to do. We can then take those que cards and begin working through them, from the top of the stack to the bottom. What we begin to realize is, that their isn't a lot to do. It just felt overwhelming because it was all inside of our heads.

At the end of the day what we seek is some sense of control over our sitaution whatever it may be. We want to know that we can influence the world around us. Whenever we are spiraling that is what we should focus on, what can be controlled in this moment.

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Repitition Of Ideas

We can hear ideas many times and think nothing of them, but then someone expresses them in an 'odd' manner and it all just clicks. Same idea, same concepts, nearly the same explanation but that single change allows for new connections to be made. We can finally understand the idea that we thought was too far away from us. That is the power of repitition, it is slowly getting us closer to 'perfection'.

Sometimes we can't just keep reading other peoples ideas, sometimes we have to craft our own and try to understand our own. This involves sometimes insane amount of repitition. We can explore variations of what we think and see all the various perspectives and truly understand an idea. Perhaps we have no understanding of it, but we keep attempting to understand it thus decreasing the amount of area that is unexplored. We may simply be stuck and continuously explore the same little area and after walking away from it and forgetting about exploring we can stumble upon a new area. Then we can begin repeating, and thus refining what we think and what we believe. This is growth in action. It isn't pretty or easy, it's constant defeat.

When we think of writing, it isn't constant defeat but it is trying to express the same idea in a different manner, hoping it sticks with us and helps things stick with others. It is a showcase in refinement, allowing readers to see what is occurring. We can see the unclean lines, the rough words and unedited sentences. The ideas being molded right in front of us. That is where repitition of an idea is beautiful. It allows us to have multiple opportunities to understand an integrate a piece of writing or an idea into ourselves. That is the strength of writing daily. It is trying to get those reps in, to finally make sense of an idea. Shared or unshared, it all involves repitition.

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The Depths Of Friendship

When we call someone our friend we are saying they are a person we trust and that we can talk to openly. Someone that cares for us and vice versa, but when do we begin to question if something is a matter of convience or if one party puts in more effort than the other? The point of any relationship is a matter of giving and taking, one person takes more one day and the other day the person gives. It is a mutualistic relationship, it also varies based on where people are within their own lives, and what they can give sometimes it is only an ear and at other times it can simply the joy of laughter.

Even if a person is being selfish for a short period of time, does not make them a bad friend it simply means they that they may be going through a lot. That is friendship, being their for the other person. The real issue when it comes to friendship is when it's always giving and never having the other person give. Then again where does this idea of friendship come from? The giving back and forth being a healthy friendship is simply a desire to want things from another. If we split this apart we can then look at the happiness we feel whilst being a friend to another.

When we are a persons friend do we feel that they are a positive force to our lives, fairly consistently or a negative one. This means that are the interactions, even if it involves simply giving, positive or negative? The aspect of this that is important is how do we feel and what thoughts occur before, during and after the interaction. This tells us a lot about what kind of force this person is to our lives. If they are positive or negative. If they are a friend or not.

This is difficult because we can easily keep someone in our lives that isn't healthy because we believe based on past interactions with them, that they are a good person. This is the past, but we use it to predict the future and thus we may be keeping a nonfriend as a friend because of it.

The best thing about a friend is having them be as excited as you are when good news appears. Do they hype you up? Or barely acknowledge it. Do they truly want you to win, or simply are okay with you winning but don't really care. This is one of the best things about having a friend, is the joint excitement and joy about achievements made. It is also important that they are a person you can turn to solve a problem or ask them a question.

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Past Selves

Are we beholden to our past selves? Do we owe our past selves some kind of debt? In the end the past is dead, it has shaped the current version of us but it is long dead, only we exist. If the past is gone, why do we feel like we owe the past something?

Some of us wanted to police officers or dinosaur hunters when we were children, yet do we think anything of that as adults? Or consider our teenage selves, we wanted things that we simply realized we don't want anymore. That is growth. The changes that occur whilst willing life are apart of life. When we seek to hold onto ideas from past versions of ourselves we begin to trap ourselves into one way of thinking. This is something the world of intellectuals frown upon, so of course we shouldn't do it.

Now when we think about following a single path, it does have some beauty. When we follow a single path we can just work towards it, no need to think or to readjust, we are simply on a mission. That is absolutely lovely as we have most likely built a strong purpose and thus do not feel regret or what could have been. Does this mean that we should regard our past selves highly and stick with what we believed? Perhaps, but perhaps it all depends on us. If our ideology is solid and we truly believe that past us picked wisely, we shouldn't alter our course, of course that is a big if. As we go through life we learn more and this learning leads to new information about where we are headed, so changing our minds makes the most amount of sense.

The second we become beholden to our past selves is the second we have given up absorbing new information. Their is a thin line between changing our minds based upon new information and simply flip flopping/quitting. That line varies from person to person and our own personal judgement.

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The Game Of Life

The game of life has no progress bar and that makes it a difficult game to gauge. We can't tell when we are succeeding or when we are failing, nor is there a set path for us to take. It is all a blur. We can make up some goals and thus give life some progress bars, and then society also hands us some goals that 'help' us measure our success/happiness level. That is the joke though, these goals are so foolish, go to college/university, get a job, at 25 get married, and of course own a house. These goals are just madeup, the timeline completely outdated but we can't be happy unless we hit those goals, right?

The cost that society places on youth and even adults is high, setting up goals that don't really matter, that hold no value as we chase them. We hope to find some happiness/success by chasing them but we never really do. We are just rats running around with a fake purpose. What is our purpose then? Is life just meaningless if we strip away these madeup goals? Perhaps. Or it may just be crafting the right goals, and the creating the right meaning.

Crafting our own meaning and rules to life is much harder than taking a template from society or religion or our parents but if we think about it, wouldn't it be the most rewarding? Consider when we are stuck on an extremely tough problem and spend days trying to solve it and then finally we do. That excitement that we feel and that joy can't be easily replicated. It is precious. Now imagine life and trying to crafting a beautiful life, one we love and enjoy living in. Imagine the hard work required. Imagine it. Visualize how joyous and happy we will feel once we have figured out our own goals and what drives us. It is insanely hard, but the reward should be worth it, considering our experience of life. Wouldn't that make it worth it?

During this journey it is important to not hold onto it too tightly because then we will want to quit so much. It is difficult but it is worth it. We must take it one step at a time, and explore everything as we proceed forward in life. That is what will make life worth living. Everything else is just noise in the background.

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Entering The Depths Of Knowledge

Exposure to new things or even old things in a different manner is essnetial for new connections to form. It allows new ideas to occur and for us to better understand ourselves.

When we read a book(nonfiction) we are giving our brains a new perspective and input to pull from. We are drawing ourselves away from what we believe we know into something further from ourselves. We are going deeper into the topic of choice. This depth is helpful in terms of learning but the real gift is in the new connections that are formed to various different things we already know. This may be realized through new questions arising and the exploration of those questions after one is done reading.

These connections that form are amplified by us reading two or three different books at the same time. We begin to connect the dots between the books, even if they are on completely different topics. We can apply this to video or lectures, the idea is to give our brain fodder to feed on. It craves it, and then it'll begin to jump from thing to thing, forming something magical... A question, or multiple questions.

It becomes our duty to ourselves to consume meaningful knowledge. Here the word meaningful lacks a true definition but what matters is what we consider meaningful. What we value should be consumed, it doesn't matter if the world believes it is useless because their are people just like you, that would consider it important and meaningful. Find them and pursue the knowledge that is seeked.

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Flow Control

Control comes down to one thing and that is us. It is what we can bend and make move to our will, or so we believe. The belief that we are in control and decided to alter the thermostat to 22 we were in control. Now what would occur we if wanted it to go to 50? Is that possible? Probably not, and now that control that was held is shattered. We are no longer in control.

The idea of control is interesting because we were in control of the thermostat until we couldn't make it go higher, then our control was gone. We lost it, so the question that arises is were we ever in control and were we simply lulled into a sense of security? This becomes essential when we consider every little aspect of our lives, we can't instantly be teleported to the moon if we want it, nor can we make ourselves become insanely fit within a day. Then what is the point? If these things aren't in our control, what is the point? Perhaps the point lies within the control that has been handed to us. The control that we can become fit if we work at it for a year or 3 months or 6 months, and we can get to the moon if we do x, y and z. This is within our control, it may not be easy but it is within our control.

We are not given infinite control over our lives or our existence, consider those who attempt suicide and fail at it. What we have control over is simply little bits and pieces. We must flow with the control that we are handed because it is not fixed nor is it permanent, it is fluid. This means we can go to the gym everyday for a year or do pushups everyday for a year but we can't instantly become fit. We can't increase our IQ (not 100% sure about this), but we can learn more. We can learn facts, or new skills because of the effort we apply and the questions we ask ourselves. This is within our control. That is what we must focus on. What is within our control, and what can we do with it.

The important aspect even within that is that the amount of control changes and alters in every moment and that if we have a rigid hold of it, it can simply shatter. We must be willing to let go and then take control, then let go and then take control.

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A Loss Is A Loss

We are taught to never give up and that a loss isn't a loss, but why is that? Is it so children's self-esteem doesn't go down? Or is it because that is how we can hold onto hope for bigger and better things?

The idealogy behind the whole a loss isn't a loss and that we didn't actually face defeat is not a humbling one. This also applies to the whole handing out participation trophies. They mitigate the idea of competition, the destruction and growth of ego. When a person truly loses and feels that loss, their ego gets hurt (feels terrible, great lesson), when a person wins their ego gets inflated (feels great, also a good lesson). These are life lessons, they allow us to easily observe the ego and to improve ourselves, but the whole idea of "not losing" strips that away, it takes away from the opportunity for growth to occur.

It may be done out goodness, ie not wanting children to be hurt or to go through unnecessary suffering but the intentions may lead to negative consequences that can destroy the brilliance of their future. The world inherently has winners and losers, none of those positions are permanent and that is the point. The winning and the losing become essential teachers. Stripping that away leads to a lack of opportunity to experience suffering and defeat, and also the feeling of triumph. The feeling earned when all that practice pays off.

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If life was for forever, how would we end up spending it? Would things really change, or would we forgo actually living for a number of years, until we finally decide maybe we should do something productive?

Life becomes more valuable because their is an ending, there will be a time when we will not exist. This makes every second count because we have a limited number of them, so many of us try to do 'great' things within that time period, but what about that time that slips by? The time we spend just trying to figure things out? If we had an infinite amount of time would we be able to accomplish more and be more patient? Here we are assuming that patience will increase because there is no fear of dying young or even dying old. We could easily spend a decade perfecting the art of making eggs, then another decade reading etc etc.

The feeling of time being wasted would still be high though, as we would still wait until we are thoroughly bored of doing nothing that we start doing something. Perhaps that is what pushes some people into living a life, they simply got bored of doing nothing. In the end the time allotted doesn't matter, what matters is what we believe time is worth and how patient we can be whilst doing something. Infinite time may simply allow ourselves to be lazy for longer, there is no deadline. Consider procrastination, we only really get to work at the last little bit before the deadline and crush out whatever work we have to do.

Life requires an end, for us to even begin. If it doesn't have an end, we will simply sit and wait until we feel the motivation to do something. We will not chase the clouds or the dragons, we may just waste away.

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Personal Greatness

Personal greatness, is personal! It begins by viewing ourselves as forever developing people and the key is to develop continuously. That is where personal greatness can lie, when we work on bettering ourselves every single day. Easy to say, so much harder to accomplish. That is the problem. Greatness on the personal level involves cultivating ourselves in numerous areas, and comparing it to previous versions of us. The issue is, it is very easy to talk about becoming better but much harder to actually apply this to our daily lives and actually become better.

Cultivating greatness is a difficult task in the beginning as it involves spending time and effort into building strong habits which are slowly being ingrained into us. The biggest problem we may find in building really strong habits is that we try to rush them, we try to build everything at once. We try to quickly stack habits that are half formed on top of each other, and that simply doesn't work. Perhaps if we considered that our actions must first be rock solid before jumping into the next action(habit) we could go further in life. The aspect we seem to forget is that life is long, and that if we spent time truly crafting 1 excellent habit every 6 months we would become great over time. Slowly improving over time. The end result would be phenomenal.

We lack patience, we lack the ability to think ahead about the future us. This isn't technically our fault, as it is human nature to worry about now (just like me eating some cake) and then worry about the future later, ie in the future when it becomes now. That is human nature, but human nature was designed to help us survive in the beginning but now it can become a hinderance, especially when we are trying to cultivate greatness. It is all about the long game, not the short term sprints that we do and then just crashing and burning.

Begin by cultivating one thing that is important to you and focus on that for a little awhile and then add onto it. Add another important thing, build a rock solid foundation and then go onto the next. The key here is building that rock solid foundation as it allows us to stack more and more bricks on top of the original. Once something is rushed all our bricks may begin to crumble and we are left with nothing. Starting now, leads to delicious fruit later.

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Easy Words

Words are easy, action is hard. This is false because actions are simple, they are just done. The thinking doesn't need to occur, just keep chugging along, but we think. We think a lot. So we are stuck with words and no action because words are easy.

It does not help that most of us as children were never taught that we are accountable for our words and that actions speak louder than words(so clearly mute people are the loudest speakers hahahaha). We may have heard of that saying once or twice, but we may not have given it any value because we looked around we didn't see people who were sticking with their words. Does this mean we are doomed to simply say easy words and not hold ourselves to them? To not act? Fuck. No.

As we become older we become more and more accountable for who we are, the flaws in our character and everything else. We lead our lives, so when we wish to be more action oriented, we should become that, when we wish to do x we should do that. Instead what most of us do is simply talk about things, and push things around, like how a child pushes around their veggies with a fork.

Words are wonderful. They can teach us so many things and they allow us to communicate in a wonderful and effective manner, but action. Action speaks at a volume that is astounding. Words are easy, action is hard.

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Oh and Ah

The way human beings interact with each other is one of the most interesting things in the world. Consider the differences between 'oh' and 'ah', one is taken back surprise and the other is more of a delicate realization yet the definitions of the these words are not that. Definitions aside the cultural expectations of words and body language greatly impact our interactions with others.

In some cultures it is rude not to bow to those you are serving ie at your work or towards an elder, in other cultures it is completely strange to bow to another. These can be easily explained away by simply saying it has been forever like this in that particular area, of course it will continue. Why did it begin like that? How did these little things develop? Perhaps it was so the opposite person was in a weaker position, ie below another. This could explain bowing, but what about other little cultural things that we pick up from those who are older than us? There is the aspect of wanting to fit in and belong to a group which drives us. That could be it, but it could also just be another aspect of this.

Words have also evolved as times change. We change the words to mean new things, where do these new meanings stem from? In the past we made words from older languages but as we go further where did they take from? This may seem trivial but the importance is where are things growing from, how are thy are connected, why do we see such cultural disparity in the world. These are just some questions but the most important one is what can we pull from others to improve our own existence.

These are just some drifting thoughts that seem to have no rhyme or reason, but such is life at times.

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Cultivating Resilience

When we think of resilience we typically think of a person being resilient as if it is their personality that makes them so. This may be the case for some people, but for most resilient people it isn't. What it is, is a crutch for people who believe that being resilient is something one is born with.

Resilience has more to do with the choices one makes on a daily basis. These choices influence our perspective and thus allow us to be more resilient. Now this a flywheel effect, as one becomes more resilient they will make choices that lead them to be more resilient, thus compounding resiliencey becomes greater than anything else. We can build upon what is already being built, instead of what most people who are not considered resilient do.

Those who are not resilient typically end up making choices that are directly countering what they want, which is to be resilient through the hard times. They flip flop between resilient and non-resilient decisions and thus they have built a home on sand, or simply built a sandcastle to live in (that would be so fucken cool though). When we consider every single moment in our life we must be fully aware that all those moments led to this one right here, all the decisions led to this. Who we are now is built on all those minute moments, but who we can become is also built on minute moments. Changing ones destiny is simply that simple, make consistent decisions in the direction you wish to head, make them no matter what.

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Status Quo

When we have something good is it better to leave it at the status quo and try to force it to remain as such or is it simply better to allow things to evolve and change? Once we have something good we want to hold onto it and not want anything to change and that is completely normal (normal being neither good nor bad), yet we can typically imagine a better scenario.

The fear we feel about the status quo, the good parts changing is that we don't want t hings to get worse, or change in a displeasing manner thus we limit the upside of change greatly. We can no longer allow things to evolve and grow to something even better, something that would please us greatly. We would be limited to what is and nothing more. This is quite sad but occurs all the time. We have a nice job, we don't really like it but it isn't the worst... We stay. We are in a half decent relationship, not really happy but not depressed... so we stay. Countless possibilities all being destroyed because we try to force things to remain as they are. We have foregone the right to wish for a better circumstance, yet we do, yet we still force things to remain the same.

Here is the thing about force, it only works for so long but pressure is always being built. Things must change, constantly evolving into something else, sometimes better, sometimes worse, and sometimes just the same. The second we attempt to dominate the situation and control it fully we have doomed ourselves. We are no longer allowing things to eb and flow, we are trying to keep the world from turning but the world is a hurling ball of rock whose trajectory can not be altered. The force we try to apply to keep things the same, comes at a great cost and that is backlash. Imagine a bow string being pulled further and further at some point the bow string will snap and tear at whatever was gripping it. That is typically our arm, believing that we can force our way through living. We can put some weight onto the world and sway it a little, but we can not force anything to occur. Things must change, for better or for worse.

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Without Suffering

What does it mean to achieve something? When we think of achievement we think of overcoming something difficult and feeling powerful as well as feeling blessed but is that the case of all achievement? The inherent belief that to achieve something one must suffer or at least go through some hardships, but why? Why must achievement come tied with an inherent suffering?

When we were children we viewed achievement as something that must be earned and fought for, when we strived to get an A it required a lot of effort. This is not always the case as when we find something that is easy for us to do we can still feel that we achieved something, consider sports. This proves that achievement and suffering do not go hand in hand but may be associated. The problem may lie within us, we wish to believe that one must suffer in order to achieve something, in order for something to worthwhile, but that isn't the case. Believing that we must go through something 'negative' in order to achieve something truly does limit our ability to achieve things. If the problem lies within us, so does the solution though within each of us we different problems and slightly different solutions.

The journey to achieve something can sometimes be a beautiful thing, enjoyable in everyway but we may not care about or feel that we have achieved anything in the end. THAT IS IT! Perhaps the reason we feel such a large sense of achievement from things is because we disliked the journey! If that is the case doesn't that taint the experience of feeling that sense of achievement? We disliked and suffered during the journey all to justify the end feeling of achievement. Now of course suffering is not a bad thing. When we think of the journey we take to reach certain things we can sometimes associate suffering as a inherently bad thing and thus further taint the journey and raise the stakes for the feeling of achievement. Once again this raises the question is the level of achievement tied to the level of suffering? Does one cause the other?

If we strip away the idea of achievement would we end up losing the reason we strive for goals and try to make things happen for ourselves? If we assume such a thing then perhaps we must suffer and view it negatively in order to achieve things. This seems only logical but what if we began celebrating everything? Once we view all little and big things as achievements we can easily forgo the idea of suffering as a negative thing (in terms of achievement) and have it be replaced with simply accomplishing something we wanted or needed to do. For some of us that might be drinking a glass of water, or it may be running a marathon, but if we celebrated both equally then we can still enjoy achieving something, but it would be vastly different than the common understanding of achievement. Perhaps this would be for the best, to simply celebrate all things, to enjoy living.

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A Motivation Syringe

Post was inspired by @TinkeredThinker When we consider motivation we have this belief that we can will ourselves to be motivated. That we can push ourselves to be motivated, like a sprig of inspiration at our beck and call, that isn't the case though.

When we think of when inspiration occurs we think of random times when it just arises and takes hold. This can happen at any moment or be sparked at any time but it happens more frequently when one enters a lull. Sometimes it means cleaning ones house at 2 am other times it is the wanting to work out whilst laying in bed to go to sleep, none of these times are typically convenient, thus a choice arises - to do or not to do. That is the question. When motivation arises it is sudden and powerful, and utilizing that energy can be so important to get the ball rolling and to build a habit. The problem with motivation or inspiration is that we don't command it. We can't self inspire all the time, or self motivate all the time. We simply lack the ability.

Think about adrenaline, can we magically begin to pump it into ourselves? Or is it something that is reserved for emergencies meant to be used in a fight or flight response? We know the power of adrenaline, we know that we can life cars or that a child can hold up a cabinet when they have adrenaline pumping through them and they max out their entire body. We don't try to cultivate the ability to instantly pump adrenaline through our veins, otherwise we would become reliant and reduce the effectiveness of it. Instead of that we simply train our bodies to become stronger and our minds as well. This is all to increase our everyday ability and when adrenaline begins to course through our arteries we can utilize our new found cultivation. This is power, this is consistency. Now think of motivation, isn't it similar to adrenaline? If we were to pump it through our hippocampus all the time we would become numb to it, it would lose all meaning and effect. Why don't we cultivate daily habits instead of trying to self motivate ourselves whenever we wish to do something. We try to utilize motivation as if it is something that can easily be created. Perhaps someone has broken through and gained an ability to command motivation at will but for the majority of us that is a fairytale, one we gladly believe in. What we must focus on is the daily work associated with what we wish to be motivated for.

The daily work that we put in pulls away from motivation. It stops relying on this emergency power source and instead draws into cultivating our skills and ability to do a thing. We are no longer trapped by motivation, instead we have motivation in our back pocket. Once we begin to treat motivation like adrenaline we realize we can't just command it come out, but what we can do is train and put in the work to allow it to be even more useful when it arrives.

Motivation is similar to a shot, it is condensed and extremely purified, coming and going relatively quickly and should be utilized as soon as it arrives but it should not be relied upon. Once we begin to rely on motivation we remove the edge of our knife and are left with a paper weight that has a slight point to it. We should work on the daily habits that we seek motivation to do, thus we no longer need motivation. It isn't about it being their or not.

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Squandered Time

It is easy to believe that time can't be squandered or that time can be squandered but that doesn't matter what matters is how one chooses to use their time.

When most of us think about time we think about the time how we don't have enough time to do the things we wish to do in a day, but time is not something that differs between people. Everyone has the same 24 hours allotted to them per a day but not everyone uses the time they have wisely. People argue over what it means to use time wisely but that isn't the point of this, use your time however you wish, the point of this is share the importance of weighing time correctly. If we know we have to write then why not write in the morning, if we know we wish to read for pleasure why not do that afterwards? We choose to do the things that hinder us first and the things we wish to avoid at the end, believing that we may not get a chance to do the things we wish to do if we do what we need to do first. It is foolish as it all depends on the importance that we place on everything that determines how much time is allocated to it. This is the aspect that one seems to forget when they say they are busy. We are not busy. We do have enough time, the issue simply lies on what we value.

The issue of value becomes compounded when we do not have our priorities in check, when we are unsure of what we value. Perhaps we are aware of what we value, but we simply lack the ability to rank our activities correctly. This may lead to the end of our day being less than pleasant, not a bad day simply not a well used day. Here is a fun idea, sometimes squandering time is enjoyable, taking a day to binge watch some movies and eat some deep dish pizza - this is placed with a value, some may place it with a negative value whilst others would place it with a positive value. The importance is what we make of it, what we determine it is or perhaps we live for the sake of another. If we live for the sake of another ie our parents then we must abide by what they value and not what we value. Isn't that a shame? To not be able to live the life we want, but to live the life we have accepted from another.

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Love Bites

Cats sometimes nip and bite at their owners to show affection and general niceness, now this is extremely frustrating as sometimes it is not a little nip, sometimes it is painful but this also happens with people. Some freindships are built on quips going back and forth, playful in most cases but every once and awhile when are emotionally distraught a quip can pierce us deeper than a little cat nibbling on us. This is the danger of only being able to show affection and kindness in one way.

Our interactions with others is important and in most cases we have a nice balance of quips and nicities but what if we only have quips ie that push and pull of jokes and harsh words? We limit our relationship with this other person to only that, we no can't share intimate details with them nor can we truly feel their emotions. This is the biggest shame of a relationship built on being playfully mean. We can't turn to the other for help, we can't trust them with our whole selves, we are stuck in this limbo state. This may not always be the case but when it is, it can be troublesome.

My cat keeps fucking with me and I had to write this. The part about relationships and this issue arising of fighting and arguing being the main form of communication is true. It is dangerour because it doesn't allow for healthy communication to occur, for words and intamicy to be exchanged - this applies to all types of relationships.

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In Suffering

When we consider suffering, we consider it as anegative as something to be avoided, and that makes sense. When we were young we were always told that negative things, suffering, was bad and that we should avoid it. That our emotions were truthful, along with our thoughts, but are they really? Perhaps they are simply things that appear and disappear as quickly as flash flood.

Suffering is merrily a perspective, something is not bad unless we believe it is bad, and something is not good unless we believe it is good. This is a simple understanding but one could argue that losing an arm is bad, but it depends now doesn't it? A man with one arm will not be sent to fight a war but a man with two definitely will be. The pricing of losing an arm is an easy price to pay when we consider how easily it is to lose our life. Therefore is it truly bad? Or simply our belief?

Now that is all well and good but how does this effect the modern woman or the modern man? It does so in the strangest of ways, we all think we are suffering the greatest injustices and that the world is cruel, yet this line of thinking we can find some beautiful essence that can be utilized. When we feel jealousy we can look within ourselves to see why we feel jealous and then we can direct our lives better, doesn't that make jealousy (suffering) a beautiful blessing? We now are forced to learn from what we are jealous of, we now get to see the truth of what is and not simply feel an emotion and blame it for our circumstance. This makes suffering the greatest gift.

We can learn so much from suffering, but that isn't where the true power of suffering lies. The true power of suffering lies in the manner in which we change. We start to realize how bad things can get and how much life can suck at times, with this knowledge we can appreciate how beautiful little things in life are. We can appreciate all the things we consider positive. Isn't that an absolutely wonderful gift? When we suffer we are given an opportunity to grow and an opportunity to appreciate all that we have. How can one hate suffering?(easily hahaha).

If we see bratty adults that have never truly suffered a day in their lives, they complain about everything and can never see the silver in a dity bowl. This is all because they have never faced true suffering where it fills the heart with pain. Their suffering is the lack of suffering, and this can be dangerous because it does not mean that one can't appreciate life if they have not gone through some shit. It simply means that suffering helps to assist in that, and the search for meaning also does.

Being curious about our suffering is extremely important, it gives us an opportunity to learn from it, to grow, to become more than we are. Become more than you are.

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Impatience. The Death Of...

When we are impatient we believe that it is a bad thing, we believe that it leads to mistakes but impatience isn't bad it's simply placed on the wrong things.* That is the problem with impatience, it is misplaced. When we feel impatience it is over things completely out of our control, and that is extremely pointless; yet it is done so often. What does this say about us?

Perhaps it says we are insane, or it could be what keeps us sane, does it matter? That is the question, now isn't it: does it matter? It does to an extent, we are failing to properly utilize our emotions and regulate them. If we took this impatience that is placed on things outside our control and placed it only on things that are within our control we could become wildly more productive. Consider what Garyvee used to preach, slow in the macro, fast in the micro. It is all about being fast on the day to day but expecting things to take years, ie the growth of a company. That is using impatience to your advantage, it is using the emotion in a useful manner.

If we wanted to become millionaires we would be impatient about that, we would want it now, and if we began trading in the stock market to become it we would lose millions (millions we do not have). This is because we are trying to force things outside of our control, imagine we we were impatient about a company we started or that website we needed to build. Once we have that impatient goal that is in our control we can turn that onto the micro things that need to be done. Let's be impatience about building this single page, let's hash it out as quickly as possible and get it working. Then be slow about the macro, about the things that take time and the things outside of our control. This allows for some beautiful syngery to occur. We are no longer trying to jam a cube into a triangle shaped hole.

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Power To The People

They say the people hold the power over governments, and that may be true but the problem with people is that we can never work together long enough to show our power. We allow things to divide us, we start shitting into things that don't concern us and then the people end up holding only the bag, no power at all.

Now the general public is dumb, we are dumb in the sense that we do not know what is the truth and we can easily be manipulated by media (including social media). This leads us losing power as we begin to fracture, instead of us vs hedgefunds or governments it becomes us vs us vs us vs hedgefunds or governments. Notice the general public will split their attention to each other and not to the thing that upsets them. We cheat ourselves out of what we believe in, what we want to fight for because of little things that we believe are important. Such as politics, red vs blue vs polar bear white or perhaps purple, it doesn't matter. Most of politics is all the same, just a different color and to notice this one must shift their perspective to see the various colors within each side. One can dismiss this as being useless and unhelpful to daily life, but life comes down to a few moments, moments where the shift in laws and regulation will occur and the question becomes where are the people fighting?

Are we fighting each other? Or are we putting aside our colors and seeing it as a fight for change. No longer about race or creed, but about what is right. The people do hold the power but only when united and this is why during wars propaganda is so important, when we believe in something with our entire heart and know that our neighbor also believes it we feel a deep sense of connection, and this is power. We will unite under that, but if propaganda is used to divide a country, then their may be a civil war that occurs and an attacking nation from the outside - guess who wins? The people who are united. The people that are trying to fight for what they believe is right! They could be wrong, but is that important? At least they are standing up for what they believe in. They stand united. The rest of us may be fighting each other, but those that are united will simply steam roll over others.

Fight for what is right, stand together against a common foe and make the demands necessary. Power lies in the people, but only if they stand united.

Only if we stand united.

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Lost In Thought

As we go on a drive we typically turn on music(yes if you are 'sophisticated' you will listen to a podcast), doesn't matter where we are going, we usually have something playing. This background noise leads to us simply getting lost in thought. Our minds begin to drift to day dreaming and various thoughts that can be explored. What a wonderful thing to have happen whilst being in charge of something that can easily crash or kill someone...

That is besides the point though, but just something one should be aware of. The real beauty or insanity is that we do this without any true intention, we simply wander and end up in various thought bubbles - which if done 'correctly' can lead to some fantastical results. We are no longer trying to control our thoughts, they are simply going in whatever direction this means we can observe where the mind leans to. What it desires or what it deems important. Are there thoughts about a current problem that has occurred, or are there thoughts of resucing the world from some mysterious problem? Perhaps we are living in the past through old altered 'memories', trying to create a new experience from it.

Each one of these thoughts tells us about ourselves. It informs us about what we desire or who we want to be, and even what we are avoiding. This is a beautiful gift that can be used in order to guide ourselves through thickets of bramblebushes which we consider OUR thoughts. Though what is not ideal is doing this whilst driving, but imagine any moment where nothing is being done or the task that is being done is mindless, those are precious moments to observe the minds wandering, and to learn from it. To explore beyond the thoughts arising, into why they may be arising and what they may hold for us.

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Learning To And From

Learning is full of curiosity, when something happens we must be curious and thus allow our minds to wander seeking out the answers that may lie at a distance. This is true for types of learning no matter, from learning from emotions to learning from another humanbeing, we must be curious about what is being said or what is being interpreted. Then we have to explore it.

Learning is not a static process, we can not simply lay down and learn by diffusion. Learning is an active practice that requires effort. When we consider an emotion such as frustration, it is teaching us something, the goal is to explore the emotion and the reasons it may have occurred. We want to give it a chance to speak and see where we can improve, where we can learn things from it. Maybe we need to become more patient, or perhaps we were starving because we didn't eat food for 4 days, we can learn things. Though sometimes we just feel an emotion because of something random or just because it simply arose and the emotion actually holds no value in the current moment. Consider feeling loneliness, sometimes we simply alone but that does not mean that we should place value on that emotion being felt. Does this mean we shouldn't explore it? Perhaps, but it never hurts to explore something really quickly to see if it holds a treasure. If the emotion does not serve you as a teacher or for simply being their, why not discard it? Simply laugh and let go, it is their and so are we, might as well enjoy it.

Life is constantly teaching us things but most of the time we are not open to learning, we are busy being offended or hurt to truly look and see what is being taught. We forget to see the lesson right in front of us because we may be blind with rage or simply just 'busy'. The question that should arise whenever something occurs is what can be learned from this? Then push that question further and go deeper, get more specific with the question until the answers begin to bubble up, becoming crystal clear.

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Chasing Squirrels

The world is full of... "oh maybe I should start doing..." distractions. We are constantly being bombarded with distractions. "ah investing that is it."

When we go onto the internet we are being thrown advertisements by everyone and everything, this here is a post that is being read but are their random thoughts that are appearing? Is this post the distraction? Or is it the random thoughts that are the distractions? Then their could be popups(don't worry I hate popups) that appear, and then we are extremely far away from what we intended to do, which was to read this post. These posts when it is written sometimes has distractions that stop it from being written. We are constantly trying to stop chasing squirrels because everything is trying to draw our attention from where we want it to go.

This applies to working out as well, we find a routine that works for us but someone on Twitter posts about a way to workout quicker and our thoughts begin to look into that. We have something that works for us but we begin to chase this 'better' way of doing something. We have a way to make money and then someone mentions that we should try day trading to make more money, or as a better use of our time - why? We begin to chase that squirrel, we have given up on trying to improve our business or our ability to work and are chasing our own tails. We give up on an enedvaur to find a better one whenever we see something that catches our attention - "Oh shiny!!!!!".

We stop ourselves from being able to achieve greatness in something or get far into something where it will start paying dividends because we see something shiny, something new so we chase that. This whole chasing and then finding something new and then chasing becomes tiring and leads to no results. We simply are following the fads instead of working towards one thing and continuing with that one thing until it's completion.

This is a much bigger problem when we have the internet and social media at our fingertips, we see all the possibilities that exist and then become overwhelemed chasing them all. We end up with nothing to show for our efforts. We go no where because we allowed ourselves to be pulled in equal(ish) directions, in all directions. Consider that when opening up youtube, twitter or anything else. Consider all the squirrels that exist and how little will power we truly have.

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Slivers In Dust

We have hundreds of ideas a day, thousands really but only really a few that are tangible and usable, which is important to note. We must be able to do something with an idea for it to be useful to us, otherwise it's just another thought that isn't contemplated, like cars driving by. The question that is important is what happens to those ideas that are thought about, that have caught the attention of the mind and now are slivers of something.

Most of the time nothing. Nothing happens to the thoughts that turn in slivers of something, but we may believe ourselves to be above the crowd and thus we write it down in our phone, under the section notes. What happens then? A few days go by, and the sliver turns back into an idea. A few months go by and it's almost nothing, but 30 more slivers have been written done to be executed later. They all turn back into ideas and then into nothing. We feel as if we are exhaling genius, so many thoughts occurring so many possibilities but none are realized. So what are we? Not geniuses, just people, just like the crowd. Nothing wrong with that.

Now let's say their is a person who when they have a sliver, they write it down or perhaps they don't but the second they have a chance they begin to execute on that sliver as soon as possible. This is all in an effort to allow the momentum that was created the second the sliver appeared. This is genius, or maybe it's just insanity, chasing squirrels.

The point is when a thought transforms into a sliver execute, because hesitation or putting it off leads to slivers dying. All that potential disappearing in lists. Do when possible, otherwise they all turn to dust and shortly after so may you (maybe in 50 years or 100, or maybe even as little as 10)

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Risk It For The Biscuit

It is trial by fire that leads to some great things occur, no more thinking only doing. This is the beauty of a trial by fire. When we go about life we do it risk free, or at least risk averse when we forget that risk is all around us, staying in bed all day is risky, driving a car is risky avoiding a doctors appointment is risky, it could also be safe depending on your doctor.

The world is fully of risk, yet we seem to forget this when we build our view of reality, we forget that their is an insane amount of risk in all things and that it makes life worth living. Now as one ages risks have a greater cost, their is something on the line when risks are taken, perhaps a family or a financial responsibilities like a mortgage, but when one is young what are they responsible for? Youth have the greatest amount of freedom, the highest amount of choice and ability to shift from good to bad and bad to good. Their responsibilities are low and limited, they even have time on their side but they avoid risk. They don't wish to do a trial by fire, they would much rather lazily go about life, allowing life to happen to them and not to live.

Living involves doing, exploring and risk. To live is to go through a trial by fire, to learn as we go and to push the boundaries that we believe have been set for us. Does this mean putting ones life on the line everyday, nah (fun fact your life is on the line everyday) but it does mean being willing to risk things for the sake of some type of gain or experience. Risks don't have to be crazy like betting everything on a roulette wheel, it can be simple like taking a chance on a 20 minute nap and hoping it won't turn into a 2 hour nap - silly.

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Crafting Beauty

When we think about something that is beautiful do we think about if it was intentionally crafted to be beautiful, to be elegant or if it was simply crafted out of simple necessity and it just ended up being beautiful. It could also be that the thing simply lacks flaws, or has flaws but complementing flaws that make the piece more alive.

This is the thing that one must decide for themselves, is beauty crafted or does it simply happen. When someone writes a piece such as @TinkeredThinker writes, each piece is realtively beautiful but they aren't meant to be. They are somewhat thought out but it's mainly a stream of concisouness. It is the constant practice of daily writing that has helped him construct beautiful pieces each and everytime - though of course everyone has blunders every once and awhile. Others may take time to be thoughtful with their selection of words, to be percise from the get go. Revising and editing to ensure that everything makes sense and thus arrive at a beautiful piece. A fully cohesive piece. Snipers vs machine guns, one relies on percision shooting and the other on luck (at least in the beginning

Which path is the right path? It depends, like all things beauty can be crafted but to do so is difficult. It takes time and effort, and constant revision to get something beautiful right off the start of doing something, whereas when crafting for the sake of crafting one can produce such beautiful pieces filled with heart seemingly by accident. Does this lead to 'failed' pieces? Perhaps, but does it lead to some interesting ones? Of course, because imperfection is allowed, it's allowing exploration to take the lead. Beauty simply happens as a byproduct. Not all home runs though. Whereas crafting beauty is more precise, one can learn from their mistakes extremely quickly because everything must be perfect. Once the craft has been nailed, beauty flies off the shelves because the pattern of crafting has been perfected, the percision still remains. It is no longer an accident.

Does this mean this make beauty that is accidental better? Or is it simply a different style of beauty, a woman can be beautiful but so can a sunset, sometimes in the same way but usually in different ways.

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Peaking Before The Peak

As we go through existing we live, we breathe then we die, but a lot happens between living and dying. We grow in ways we never expected, we fall on our faces in ways that make us chuckle many years later, and then their are falters that make us worry about our life. These are typically considered negative and bad, so we avoid them. They are the times we fail to reach the peak, and thus stop climbing, ending up at what we believe is our peak.

The day to day of our life is the aspect that should be questioned the most, it should be seen as what it is, everything. The moments that make up the day make up the next day, and that makes up the next day and then we die. That is the typical life that most lead, their is nothing wrong with it, expect when one isn't content with it. We complain, we fight against with our words, always being unhappy. We get angry because of our own inadequancies, lashing out and blaming others because we reached our 'peak'. This is a very sad way to live, being angry and upset at others because we determined our failure, and simply gave up. How can we blame others for this? Easily.

It takes no effort to simply give up and blame others. When we give up and consider something our peak we have determined that we can not go higher than that, we have reached the greatest aspect possible, it isn't possible to go 1 extra inch or an extra foot. Those inches make a difference, the continuous wanting and doing to achieve more, to climb higher - to set new records. That is what we should do.

It is simple, do what you know that if you did daily would lead you to be the person you want to be. That will lead to the greatest improvements because it is being built on everyday, each day has moments that when reflected upon leads us to feel proud of ourselves. When we go through living, breathing and then dying we can look back and see numerous peaks, with some valleys. We can see the growth and the magic that is living. The constant pushing to be more that what we are, the pushing to a new peak.

Don't kill your next peak yourself.

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No Knowledge

Having knowledge is a wonderful thing, the ability to do so many things, the opportunity to do anything in the world. Yet how much of that knowledge is applied?

Knowledge unapplied begins to die, it becomes tainted knowledge, corrupted knowledge. We must apply it whenever we can, we must use it to improve our life when we can. That is our obligation by learning that knowledge.

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Avoiding Traffic

When we are stuck in traffic we have this sense of urgency, this sense of needing to keep moving even if it is at a slow speed. We want to constantly be moving, similar to sharks. We can't stand still, because then something happens...

We are forced to think, to face ourselves. When we stop in traffic our brain turns off autopilot, we break our automatic thinking, we are forced into the moment. That is the problem. We are forced into the moment and then forced to face ourselves, this is a huge problem for people as we don't like to face ourselves. It is like we constantly have a little rock in our shoes, which when we are doing things such as driving, we can easily ignore. The second we stop moving, we are forced to notice ourselves, all the things we avoid. That is the problem with traffic.

It isn't the traffic, it is us. The traffic simply forces us to face ourselves, and it makes us hate traffic, as if we need to be somewhere, and that a few seconds will make a huge difference. The practice of meditation forces us to be in the moment and not rush through life. It is a bunch of moments to face ourselves, we can't do anything else. If the mind wanders, we wander it back to the breathe or simply just start noticing the constant thinking. It is free practice for us to become great at being patient, at facing ourselves without any distractions (ideally, but distractions make it so much more interesting). This may be known, but it isn't understood until it's been done for a little bit, then the benefits begin to shine.

It isn't avoiding traffic, it is simply avoiding the self.

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New Shiny Thing

We become enamored by new things, we want the newest device, or a new dish washer or... We want the new shiny thing, over the thing that simply works.

When we think of a washing machine we don't care about it, we simply want it to work. Think a little bit further than just that, what if we could replace our old washing machine with a fancy new one. One that has a brand new shine. We want that, we may not need it but a part of us wants it. It is the part of us that is like a crow, we simply want the shiny new thing. There is no real difference between a washing machine now and a washing machine from 10 years ago, they both clean clothes. A new washing machine vs a used one, both clean clothes. The new one feels more special, feels like it has more value (it does, but given any thought one realizes that both are the same). So why feel that awe of a new washing machine, when nothing has really changed? We sometimes even feel that this new thing will change our lives. We will suddenly become better, in some magical way. We don't though. Nothing changes. We just get hit with some dopamine and that is it.

If we think about the iphone, and we think about most new iphones they aren't that different from the previous years iphone, so why do we love it when we get a new one every year? Most iphones can easily last 3 years, if not 6 years, yet we get allored by this shiny, we love the shiny. New things make us feel like we are new, that we have changed and we love that. We like that feeling of success and improvement, even though nothing has inherently changed within us. This is all about dopamine, we enjoy that feeling of success and specialness. It isn't about anything else, oh the camera is barely better than the year before. Now if we are producing movies with our phones then yes, invest in the slightly better technology but for most of us, we don't need it. We don't even notice the difference, yet we will watch a review on the newer iphone and say we need that. Replace the word iphone with any device or tool. We do not need these new things, but a part of us wants it, we crave it.

Why do you want the new thing? Will it change your life, or simply gives the feeling or impression that life will change because of this thing that really is the same thing as the previous thing. Notice how many times the word thing was used in the past sentence... that is how little they matter, they are all the same.

What is being done with the self? Or better yet what needs to be done with the self in order to feel fulfilled?

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When The World Crumbles

When we think of default responses we should think of what is our default response when something goes truly wrong. How do we react, and what are the emotional states/thoughts that occur? These are important questions because they tell us information about ourselves.

The last time something went wrong, what was the default state or reaction that occurred? This is where meditation and focus becomes obvious, was their simply panic or was their taking care of business. Taking care of the problem that arose, and looking for solutions immediately, not reacting on emotions but simply dealing with the situation and then processing emotions. Or was there instant panic and then lashing out? This could be towards the world, or towards yourself. Why was that your default reaction? Simply giving up and laying blame, why was that the default?

These questions are very telling about our own psychological state and the manner in which we approach life. We must think of the worst things that have happened to us over the course of our life, and consider how our reactions have changed over that life time to things going wrong, or they have stayed the same. Consider the best result of that reaction, then consider the best reaction possible and that outcome - here is where the true gift of this thinking occurs, who ended up in a more positive life? Which reaction would lead to that? This is thinking may allow you to be more mindful the next time something goes wrong, it may be something that can be improved upon or it may be something that is perfectly fine.

Begin with questions.

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Slip Slidin Away

Time is a fickle thing, it ticks away no matter what. It ticks away even when we want it to fault. We think that when we take a break or when we work hard that time is not ticking away, until we become aware of it. Then the entirety of time comes crashing down. We begin to realize that time is always slip slidin away, no matter what we do.

As time slips away when a task is being done, and the day is complete we begin to realize that time is slip slidin away. Then we begin to realize that we need to hurry and complete the day, we must get as much done as possible. We begin to think about the time we failed to spend with our families, working on our dreams and the time we 'wasted' doing nothing. The thing about time is that it is wasted no matter what is done. The only thing that stops time from being wasted is when we believe it is worthwhile. When we decide to enjoy the things we do, without regret or anything of the sort then we can will freely believe in the life we live. We can let time slip away because it is no longer being squandered but that is a hard way to live.

The life of one fully present and one fully living is not afraid of the time slipping away. The thing is, is that time slips very easily. It is easy to fall into a dopamine catch, where we let time slip and ourselves with it. Then a few centuries later, or perhaps a few days we realize that so much time has slipped by and we have regrets about that time. We never really thought about that time, or the things we chose to do. When we start to be curious and start to question, we can realize that life is full of adventure. We can start choosing things, and living without regret.

Regret is the death of people. It is done out thinking time could be spent better, but better how? Time will slip and slid away no matter what.

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Ready Player One

The best emotion is the feeling of success after hardship, this can be added into daily life by simply learning and being curious. When we take time to learn something it can be difficult, and in that difficulty we can find frustration and joy. It is within the hardships, within the annoyance that we can feel ourselves overcoming.

When we feel like we arent growing we can fall into a depression, a sadness because we know we aren't nearing our full potential but once we introduce difficult things into our daily life (an easy way to do that is working out or learning). We can take a subject we want to learn more about and start learning about it, and then thinking about it; finding problems online about that subject then trying to solve those problems. The issue that typically arises is that we pick something of the highest difficulty, we place the reward too far away and thus give up.

Consider a videogame, most have played one in their life and in playing we find that we must struggle to achieve an end goal in the game, but that end goal has hundreds of mini goals. Those mini goals are the hurdles, the difficulties that when overcome provide us with a high hit of dopamine or just joy. This is constant, it is artificial as the thing we have done doesn't hold much value in the world, but all these dopamine hits, hit at the perfect time. Right before giving up. Another thing is, is that we know we can win after enough times trying, whereas with life we sometimes do not know if we can win (whatever the definition of winning is).

Each videogame is designed carefully to reward the player after completing something challenging, and as the player progresses the game becomes harder to match the skill level of the player. If we take a brand new player and place them at the highest level of a game, they will give up quickly, because they haven't built up the skills to match that difficulty. It is nearly impossible for that new player to win or to continuously try again. So they quit.

Bringing this back into the context of daily life, we can't pick building a spaceship as our first goal, we must pick something more tangible perhaps learning how circuits work or how to code "Hello World". The meme in the coding world is what a joke "Hello World" is, but it gives that first sense of accomplishment, that first hit of magic. It isn't necessarily difficult, but it shows the user the possibilities of learning coding. That is what it is all about, creating that belief that anything is possible and then setting up little challenges in between. This is where university courses with their problem sets help, they make the user challenge themselves a little bit at a time. Of course their are problems with university courses, but alas that isn't the discussion of today.

Design things to be challenging, but ensure that it is possible to beat given some time and effort. That is key, that is difficult in its own right. Crafting the right level of challenge.

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Observations Of Being

The greatest super power one can cultivate is that of having the ability to observe and then act. When we see a problem arise, how do we approach it? Do we observe ourselves and problem or do we simply lash out and leave it as an unsolvable problem? Most problems are not unsolvable, they simply have not been observed from a different perspective. When we increase our awareness we can see things before they become giant problems, then we can break those problems apart.

Breaking a problem apart is essential to solving it, but this all begins with first becoming aware of the problem. Awareness gives us a chance at solving the problem, before then we are simply at the mercy of the problem - which we will blame others for. When we consider our life and living, we should observe ourselves and the interactions we have. This includes the emotions that arise, as well as the thoughts that arise. We must bring awareness to everything, then bring up questions, and seeing where the thoughts lead from those questions. We just have to follow the strings that come off of the thoughts.

Once we begin to follow the thoughts that begin to arise from the questions that we asked, we can begin to realize where we stand in regards to the problem. This is becomes extremely crucial, the fact that we observe our reactions to the thoughts that are arising. These thoughts tell us a lot about ourselves, and can act as a guide for our wellbeing. It starts with the self, it starts with the super power of observation.

By getting better at observing ourselves we begin to see the issues that lie within us, the problems that arise as we live. We give ourselves options, options to change and to grow. All stemming from observations of the self

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Visual Reset

When we think about trying to get out of a funk, what do we think of? Do we think of changing something minor, or do we seek some grand move that would be in a movie? Which one has the higher probability of occurring?

We get swept up with the idea that we must flip our entire lives around all in one swoop, easily and cleanly, but where does this idea come from? We see this happen in movies and TV shows a lot, and they seem so put together and functional - we romanticize that concept of pulling a full 180. To us that is true success, nobody ever thinks about being the person that slowly rights the boat, or the one whom simply keeps slowly chipping away at an idea or topic over an extended period of time. In a sense the whole doing it all in one fellow swoop is about the ego. It is egotistical to do it all at once, we can then show people how much better we are than them, we can push things onto others.

Changing ourselves begins with us, it begins with the little things. Go get a haircut, shower, clean your room and then work on thing that has been picking at your brain. That is how lives change. It is by taking the simple, small steps towards whom we want to become that make the greatest impact. We are the sum of our habits that we do on a daily basis - the term habit is being used as anything we do. The daily things we do compound so quickly, 5 mins over 365 days.... Over 30 hours... Imagine how much listening or doing something for 30 hours has an impact on us. How much it can penetrate our minds. It all begins with slowly righting the ship, slowly picking up the pieces and placing them in the right slots. Right being relative to who you are.

Begin with a visual reset, of what you can see in your surroundings. Then work on all the other little stuff, remember a year flashes by.

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Growth Of A Mountain

In order for life to proceed we must challenge the status quo, most thing that means challenging society but it isn't about society. It is about challenging the status quo of the self. Our focus shifts to society and how we can make the greatest impact on it, perhaps to be remembered or perhaps to feed our ego.

The issue with trying to have the greatest impact on society is that society isn't something that one person can tackle, it begins at home. It begins with ourself, dealing with the problems that we have with ourselves. This means that we need to push ourselves to grow and get better, this getting two birds with one stone. We are improving ourselves, thus being better able to help others and the second and perhaps even more important aspect is we give others permission to grow.

A lot of people have a problem with believing in themselves and to give themselves permission to go past their present self or what has been done before. Having someone around you achieve something that seems to be impossible, that seems to be far fetched gives us permission to do the same, to challenge ourselves.

Challenge yourself, challenge yourself from wherever you are. If it is only possible to do 1 pushup, then do the 1 pushup and get that to 2 pushups. If it is possible to make $100 from a side business, try to grow that to $1,000. Push past the limits that are set. It is about starting from where you are at, then going past that, and growing a mountain from a seedling.

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Ideal Day

Consider the daily doings of everything that happens, from the good to the bad. The daily doings of life constantly occurring, never truly thought about but always complained about. Rushing from one thing to the next thing, and then to the next thing, when will we stop?

We can stop at any point, we can pause at any point, yet we don't. When we pause, we give our self a chance to breathe, a chance to contemplate our day to day happenings. We can question why we do the things we do, we can give ourselves time to grow. Giving some time to contemplate the happenings of life, allows us to exerty some influence onto the happenings, at least in the future. This is also something that can help us in the moment as well. We need to give ourselves time to process information, to contemplate what is happening, to observe thoughts.

When we take a moment we can begin to appreciate life. Seeing the tiny little pieces of information as individuals and as a collection, which allows us to see the beauty of everything around us. We can also see where the poisonous aspects of life are, perhaps even the people or situations that harm you.

Give some time to contemplate, to reflect and figure out what is the ideal day.

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Cost Of Freedom

If we want control over things, we must pay for it! If we want to have freedom, or control over our privacy it costs money, as companies need to make money. When we use a service that is free we must consider how the company makes money. Easy answer is they make money on the data they collect, ie the data we provide them.

Most people want control over their privacy but they aren't willing to pay $5/month for it. We want privacy for free, we want security for free, otherwise we are fine getting jerked around as much as a company will. That is the cost of laziness, of being cheap. Make more money or stop eating out as much, invest money into you. It is your wellbeing and the future of childrens wellbeing on the line.

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Free Form

We give up control over our data and information very easily, using tools that we don't control. These tools can be altered and changed based on the whims of the ones who control them. We use them with the belief that we control them, that we are in charge but we are simply using the tool. Changes are made, we scream in outrage and then we return to the tool, a few months later we say how we like the new changes and we begin to use them. This is all said to allow us to feel like we are in control and that we chose the circumstances that we are in. This is a false reality, we are at the whims of the ones who made and own the tools we use.

Consider email, most people use Gmail, Outlook or Yahoo, if something changes that we don't like we simply have to put up with it or suffer a large change in our workflows by switching. If they all decide to charge $1/month for email services, what could anyone do? We could switch to an open source email system, but that is difficult to do. So are we simply stuck?

Now if we take a look at what has recently occurred on Twitter, with a ton of accounts getting banned, we realize we have no control. We either comply or get kicked off, or in the case of governments, get thrown in jail. The people who make a living off of these various social media apps or other applications that they do not own, can't do anything if the owners or people in charge decide to do something. They will lose their income, lose their method of living. That is the cost of using tools that you have no ownership over, we can't do anything against system wide change, expect to walk away and refuse to use it (hoping that enough people do the same). The real issue arises when the masses will not be changing, they will simply take what is given to them, even if they hate it.

Decisions must be made on what services one uses, what reliance they have on those services and what their options are. Life is about creating as many options as possible - give yourself an out.

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Taking Care

In our existence we need to take steps to take care of ourselves, these steps are either preventative or they are reactive. Both come at a cost, preventative measures are typically cheaper than reactive measures but they may be unnecessary until of course the thing that we are thinking of trying to prevent occurs. There is a cost to everything, and sometimes the cost is simply taking some time, sometimes the cost is a euro amount, but such is the aspect of living.

Costs are important, lower backpain can be prevented but most young people never think about it until it becomes a problem now instead of a quick preventative measure, they are stuck with a long intensive reactive measure. There is a cost to taking care of the self, whether it is paid in advanced or not is the question.

A really excellent manner to think about all of this in is what is the cost of things going wrong. If there is a 10% change of death, or pay $200/month to prevent it (or 10 hours/month), what would be picked? Of course one has the option to do nothing and thus they will not lose anything, but that chance of death will remain - is that risk worth it? The percentage of risk is low but the consequences if the risk occurs is extremely high. What if we took a 20% chance of lower backpain or pay $150/month to prevent it (or 7 hours/month), would the price be paid or would the chance be taken? Here the percentage of risk is medium, the consequences if the risk occurs are low/medium. This is what is occurring all the time all around us, with the choices we make regarding our health. We must decide what is worth and what isn't worth it, and each person is different. Regardless of the person we all want to be healthy. Count the costs and balance the sheets - nothing is perfect, but make the attempt.

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The Art of Doing Or Perhaps Not?

When we consider free will, we think about how we have the power to do things or we may think of how we don't have the power to do things and everything is predetermined. These thoughts lead down different paths, but in the end they are simply thoughts. What we should do is reflect on our experience and question it, question some more, and question it. That is how we can learn the nuance of living.

Let us assume free will doesn't exist, if free will doesn't exist does that mean when we get an eye injury we don't seek for different solutions? Does it mean that we just wait for a solution to arise? Or is the idea of not having free will is that whatever action that is taken is meant to happen? This implies that are search for repairing our eye injury is a part of not having free will, it is a part of not having choices. Couldn't that simply be free will though? It involves doing, even not doing is a form of doing. Is free will the idea of control? Then wouldn't us trying to repair our eye be our way of trying to exert control over the situation that is our injured eye? Do you see the problem that lies in thinking about free will?

At what point is something free will and when is it simply destined to happen, that is a question that can't easily be answered. It is something beyond the terms of us, because we can't tell when something is happening because it was destined or when we have broken this 'destiny' by exerting our free will. With that being said free will can't exist. All choices and decisions are destined, so if we believe something is done out of free will that could have been predetermined. That thought can be a little terrifying, because it means we have no control and thus what is the point of living? If we have no free will that doesn't mean we stop doing, it simply means let go of the idea of control over the little details. Let go of trying to make something perfect, just do and that is it. Choosing to do nothing is also a form of doing.

Or perhaps this is all a trick and we do have free will.

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Force Of Will

The idea of will power is important, it allows us to force ourselves to do things. It gives us power over our circumstances, or at least the belief of power over our circumstances. Will power is a great thing, increasing our reservoir of will power is a wise idea. But their is another aspect of will power, and that is actualizing our will onto others.

We can use our will to force others to do things, we can use it against people as if we know better. We may know better, but we also probably don't know better. The greater ones will, the greater the force applied on another, all in the name of "I am right", or what we would like to believe is as looking out for the other person. This will is dangerous because instead of leaving people to their own devices and choices, one makes them choose what they want. Now they will forever hold it against us, if it fails; if it succeeds the likelihood of a thank you or whatever we expect is nearly nill. Doing the quick maths we can realize that forcing our will on another has a negative outcome for all parties involved, especially for the one who is doing the forcing. Especially for us.

We must think of this will power as an actual physical force, once we do that we can easily see the negatives of our actions. Consider when someone tries to force something together or pry something apart, what happens typically is that the item ends up broken. Force is a dangerous thing, sometimes it must be applied as their are things that need to be done. What is even more dangerous is not being to let go of force. Make a suggestion, then leave it. It is our duty to help others, it is not our duty to live others lives for them. We do not have an ultimate understanding of another, we barely even have an understanding of ourself. So why force our will onto another? What right does one have?

Kids are different, a complex topic (if you said "all complex topics, are just made out of simple pieces, so simplify it" DAMN RIGHT HAHAHAHAHHA, totally agree.), alas a topic for another time, another moment.

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Pay Attention

Increasing awareness of our body and our mental state allows us to protect ourselves from internal issues and external issues. Awareness allows one to pickup issues arising from within, and coming from the outside. Once the issues are noticed and awareness has gazed on them, then we can adjust accordingly. We can decide to get up and go for a walk, or to pause and breathe.

Awareness lets us to start to cultivate living in the moment, so when something occurs or something arises in awareness we can pause and then react accordingly. This is vastly different than noticing something and simply being annoyed. That momentary pause gives us options, it allows us to create something new and break away from old patterns.

We can notice when our bodies begin to feel tired and sore, perhaps that means one needs to stretch? We can notice when someone or something upsets us, we can then remove that stimulus or we can be aware of our rage, and just breathe. Stopping yourself from reacting in a manner that is negative, instead we can feel our emotions and then let go. That is what awareness gives us. It is the greatest gift a person can receive, it is one of the greatest things a person can cultivate as well.

Pay attention and be rewarded.

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Owned By Our Tools

The issue with having fancy tools, tools that only work when you have power or specific equipment or perhaps even internet is that once those things are taken away those fancy tools become useless. We begin to rely on our tools so heavily that we begin to be unable to do anything without them. We are incapacitated without them.

If the power goes out we can not use our fancy online tools that allow us to be efficient. Does this mean we should stick with rudimentary tools? Not at all. It simply means have backups that are offline, that are simple and can be used in a moments notice. Do not forget that sometimes things go wrong and we should not simply put all our eggs into something we do not control.

This really applies to things we do not own, consider Notion it is extremely powerful and works like magic but it is not owned by you, if they update things you have no power. If they end up shutting it down, what can the end user do? Or if the internet is down for a day, all access to those notes is gone. Whereas a note taking and second mind application like Obisidian is completely offline and you own 100% of it. This means it can still be accessed and still provides one with the things they need even if the company goes under. Both of these are excellent tools but both rely on a computer to be used. Now what if we have a paper system as a backup? This system can always be worked on whenever paper is available and surface to write is available. This tool has the drawback that it can be easily lost or destroyed.

All tools have their uses and times of use, but the key is to never be married to any single tool. Tools fail, they break and sometimes they get lost, and to rely on it as your lifeblood is a fools gamble. The case of them being completely destroyed is rare, it may be extremely rare but if it happens do you have a backup? Don't be owned by any single tool, use them, use them well but always know they are simply tools.

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Drops Of Nectar

The greater the struggle the greater the reward for beating the struggle. If we can fully understand that simple truth, we would be much more willing to suffer. We would be willing to okay with struggling and failing as we learn. No longer trying to rush through the hard parts and get to the easy parts where our thinking is automatic.

This is what most students from a young age strive for, they want it easy and spoonfed. This mentality carries over as they become adults and thus they fail to learn new things and grow. We no longer are willing to go through hardships, knowing that getting through them will lead a great amount of ecstasy. We want things now, and we want them easy. We refuse to work for things, to solve things and of course to fail.

Human evolution has shown that we want to conserve energy. We don't want to waste energy on hardships or the path that is harder, we want the easy path. We want the easy path and we want the fruits of the hard path. This is common as it gives us all the rewards without wasting our 'precious' energy and time. The thing we must understand is that our energy is not precious, in terms of the amount of calories we have. Most of us eat more than we truly need (albeit not healthy food), we have calories to spair but our instincts are to keep that energy for the future.

This is where we must ingrain this logic into our minds and bodies, that the rewards of the struggle are great. Though this is with a huge caveat, which is struggling for the right things... How does one know what is the right struggle? Simple. You just know, a safe answer is if one is learning something and it doesn't harm others or yourself, it is probably a good struggle.

Teach yourself that struggling to achieve something makes the nectar of achievement all the more sweeter.

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The Art Of Negotiation

It is extremely easy not to do things. It is extremely easy to simply not quit the thing that harms or to not start learning something important to your growth. This is the issue with a lot of our problems, it takes no effort to do 'nothing'. Doing 'nothing' is actually not doing nothing, but it is actually doing something. It is working against what someone truly wants. The question may arise that if someone truly wanted something they would go to chase it, and they wouldn't do 'nothing'. That is an important thread to tug at.

If we wanted to achieve something, we would do something to achieve our so called dreams or goals. We wouldn't allow laziness to stop us; clearly we do not want it. We do not want those goals or dreams. Or perhaps we are afraid of the consequences of getting what we want, and then realizing everything has changed (fun fact everything is changing every moment). These are questions that are important to think about when we are dealing with ourselves. It is easy to forget that we can easily trick ourselves into believing things to save face, or to simply avoid something unpleasant (for some it is about avoiding something pleasant).

The ease of not doing something is so great that we must be wary of it. We must question our motives, and see why we seek a goal of ours. What is the purpose we seek? What are we afraid of? Humans are so scared, of so many things that this question is important! What are you afraid of, that may occur if you seek out your goals? Perhaps we are afraid that we are not worthy of reaching new heights, but us playing small does not serve others. It simply hurts everyone involved. We may simply not be wanting that goal, but simply picked it because we think it is the right thing to do. So then the question becomes how can we will ourselves to pursue that goal until we find a goal that we truly desire? This could be our opportunity to negotiate with ourselves. We can simply negotiate that we will pursue this goal until a better goal arises and keep on the look out for a better goal, more suited to ourselves.

The true art and skill that one can garner is learning how to negotiate with oneself, that can be harder than negotiating with others. That is the craft we build. This will allow us to cultivate a greater ability to do things that we do not wish to do, or simply not having a strong enough desire to do a thing.

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Growth Of Resistance

Resistance is such a sneaky thing. Resistance seeps into all cracks, in through any possible manner and builds ups so quickly. Awareness is not enough to stop resistance, it can barely even slow it down. It simply allows one to alter their own direction in order to not fall off the wagon. This makes a world of difference in terms of quality living. We can be aware that we are falling off the wagon and quickly readjust and ensure that we don't fail.

Resistance is a scary thing because it can make doing simple actions difficult because it adds to the activation energy required in order to get things done. Resistance as mentioned in previous posts is a very powerful force that is a multiplier and not simply an additive function. Consider the post skip a day, skip a week that post was made because of how powerful resistance is. Resistance is something that multiplies itself, it isn't something that can be brushed aside easily for most people. This is why skipping a single day becomes dangerous, it leads to us skipping another day then another week this becomes a huge issue as we can't get back on the wagon and have complete control over things. This leads to losing good habits very easily, whereas bad habits simply keep compounding on each other. That is the real issue with resistance compounding.

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Yearly Changes

A lot of people think 2020 was the worst year, it was a terrible year and 2021 will be better. They thought 2019 was terrible and said 2020 will the year will be their best year. They said 2010 was a bad year and 2011 will be better. These words are said by people who have no intention of changing and altering themselves so that they can cultivate a better year. Most people who had a good previous year simply will say next year will be even better. These people are continuously growing, altering and expanding themselves to be better. They will have a better year, even if things are hard, they will have a better year.

A lot of people complain about things, but never are willing to change, they complain about everything, from the year to the bit of traffic they got stuck in. They will always complain. Looking at the world as the primary giver of faults, and that nothing is their fault. Nothing is within their power, expect anything that they consider good, then they have achieved it. Their are others who believe everything is their fault, from good to bad. They believe that they can change everything, that all they must do is vary their perspective. One will feel complete freedom even when chained up, the other will feel completely chained up when they have everything they desire.

Now actual years don't care, they don't alter or change, they simply exist. Their existence is tied to the people who believe in the various years and that Jan 1st is the new year and not july 2nd. Their is no difference day by day. The real difference lies within us, as people. We alter, we change that is the growth of mankind. We are the bringer of changes to time, we can shift our entire life within a year. Their are plenty of people who transformed their life in 2020, or in 2008. Years don't matter, the perspective we take and the things we do matter.

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Tricking Activation Energy

Getting over the hump is the hardest thing. It is that first bump that requires the most activation energy, getting the ball moving allows it to keep moving. This the aspect that one can focus on. We can focus on just getting that ball moving, not thinking and simply doing. Hoping over the activation energy bump by simply not even acknowledging it. If something doesn't exist, then we can go straight through it, as there is nothing their expect for air.

That is the special little key. Tricking yourself into not thinking, or simply not thinking and just doing. Here is a direction, here is the first step which could be the fourth step, but all that matters is just going. Holding some general knowledge, but the rest is simply done through doing. Consider the idea of Forrest Gump, he was a fool, a dunce but he achieved so much because of the attitude of simply doing, doing and doing. Thinking increases the activation energy required, it increases the resistance. If we stop thinking right before we will reach the overthinking stage, we have now beat the system. We have foregone the activation energy required by not even allowing it to be created. We have a general plan. We can simply get going and keep going, adjusting as is required. That is the trick to achieving things that seeem otherwise unattainable.

That sounds so simple, so very simple but it is honestly the most difficult thing ever. To stop the mind from overthinking, thus switching from thinking to doing. That switch if mastered allows us to accomplish anything. We can get ourselves to easily workout and to work on the projects that are important to us. We only have a few moments before we begin to overthink. Only a few moments in which we can switch into doing without worrying about the activation energy required.

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Videogaming Life

It can be hard to videogame life, to think of every task as adding or subtracting from whom exists today and who you will be in the future. Videogaming life makes everything more fun, it's all just a game anyways, now it's simply a reinforced game. We are trying to trick ourselves into doing positive sum things and not negative sum things, that is the goal of the videogame. We can also add to enjoy ourselves to that list as well.

A videogame reinforces us to keep playing, it has rewards built right into it, it is designed to breast feed us dopamine once we are about to stop playing. This gets us hooked, we keep playing everyday, because we need to check in, we need our dopamine hits. If we can somehow influence our minds and create systems that treat this world like a videogame we will have a much better degree of enjoyability in life (not sure if that is a word). Consider the sims or any game where you control a character, in the beginning they are weak and feeble. We must build them up, assigning them tasks, ie workout for 3 hours to increase strenght, so that we can go slay the level 3 demon. Then when we do it, we feel rewarded; look at our hardwork. This gets us to sit and play for 3 to 6 straight hours, with little movement. Yet we can't meditate for 10 minutes without moving...

How do we transform our life into a videogame? How do we incentivse and track our progress? We don't come with an exp bar sadly. Perhaps the answer lies in data, collecting data and comparing it past versions of ourselves. We don't notice that the first time we started working out we could only do a maximum of 15 pushups, and after a month we can now do 25. Simply believe we could always do 25, as we fail to remind ourselves of how far we have come. This is a common occurance with all aspects of living, we forget the progress we made and thus discount ourselves and our achievements. It is hard to maintain proper perspective like this.

Collecting data, this adds a hurdle to progress, because it involves more steps to doing things, which as humanbeings we do not like to do. Here we must simplify the process of entering data and maintaining records for things as simple as possible or keep it right in front of us at all times. That is how we can easily measure progress and see what is effective and what isn't. Lots of confounding variables still at play, but we only need the general idea. What if we become addicted to 'leveling up'? Thus forgetting to live and enjoy life? This could be a serious problem that would halt our ability to truly live in the moment. Alas their is always an issue with everything that exists to some extent. The answer is simple though, don't track everything, just track the stuff that is essential to you. Track what is deemed important by your own standards, and leave the rest out. Keeping it simple.

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A godless world, is that where we have ended up? When we think of religion we think of an old world, outdated thinking, some of us are still religious but most are not. It makes sense, to be nonreligious allows one to have many freedoms but whe`n we believe their is no god or fate that gives life meaning we seem to have no meaning. We give up life satisfaction for the sake of freedom. That has it's benefits but it also has it's drawbacks.

When we are godless we seem to lack this fundamental thing that our ancestors had, which was faith in something larger than themselves. This gave them the ability to go through any hardships, and simply wipe things away and keep going. They could simply put it all on the world or this entity and help others, with the belief that it was the right thing to do. It is the right thing to do.

Now we live in a world where it isn't about right or wrong, it is about does this benefit me or harm me. It is all about the self, it is not about anyone else (perhaps your family). In this world it is us against them, we no longer have a collective entity, a purpose. This of course is why people cling to cliques and groups of people. Consider twitter mobs, it is all about finding a purpose greater than ourselves. These are all simpler versions of religion. People like to identify with their people, ie "I am a vegan", "I love sports", these are simply different ways of attempting to give our lives meaning, but they aren't effective.

So is religion the only way to be satisfied with our existence? Not really, but it is a simple way to give ourselves a meaningful life. It provides us a rule book of right and wrong, just follow the rules, simple as eating pie. We enjoy that, we enjoy having purpose and reasons to why things do what they do. When people lack a greater purpose they tend to feel lost, and they feel like their life is meaningless. This leads to people feeling depressed because what is the point of life! Why do they exist? There is none, and that is a terrifying thing. That is absolutely terrifying.

Where do we seek solace? That is the question, we don't believe in religion (or more precisely an all knowing and powerful entity), but we still want to find a greater purpose than simply being alive or existing for our own sake. So where do we find this key piece of the puzzle? It is different for each and every single person.

We have to find that reason, if we do not seek shelter in a religion and believe in it whole heartedly. We must seek out why we exist for ourselves, find others on the same journey or those who have 'completed' that journey. Consider what makes you feel satisfied in life, consider what makes you feel alive and what can you live with. These are not simple questions, but extremely difficult questions, that should raise other questions. What does it mean to be alive?

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Simpler Ideas

When things start to get complicated we begin to pull away at a certain point, when it becomes too much. Then we double our efforts (using our will power) to ensure that we stay focused and continue to execute on the tasks. They continue to get more complicated and at some point will power will not be enough, so what happens? We simply walk away, giving up or we become extremely stress trying to tackle the problem. All of this is to prove our superiority to ourselves or perhaps to others.

Simplicity is harder to achieve than complexity, but once that has been achieved it can be maintained for much longer. It may even allow for a medatitive experience, consider zen in the art of archery. We must over complicate things in order to feel like we are progressing, when things are becoming simpler we may end up feeling as if we are degreasing. It also can also deflate the ego as now anyone can learn it. We take away our feeling of being special.

Now what about things are just vastly complicated because they are high level things, well they can be broken down into simpler things as well, still complicated but simpler. This can be applied a number of times and then all that is left is hundreds of tiny building blocks that individually are simple but put together create a very complicated idea. This does not ruin the complex idea, but simply implies that it involves a lot of simple ideas that are put together - so even if a person was given one of the 10 simple ideas, they could not come up with the final product. They must learn all the simple ideas.

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The Thinker

One of the greatest abilities a human being can have. When a person can think and question their own thinking they have the ability to achieve almost anything. Mix in a bit of creativity and an unstoppable force has been created. The process of this thinking being is alwayys being refined and developed into a more streamlined and accurate representation of reality.

Most people have brief thoughts, one thought, then a gut feeling "ah yes that is the one". They end up going with the first thought that pops into their head. They lack the ability or the willingness to quesetion that first thought, and then push further into that thought. The goal of the thinker is to produce the best thought, they don't just pick the first thought, they see the first thought then go further with it. This leads them to pull at the strings of the thoughts that are connected to that initial thought. Then new questions arise and they continue to think beyond what is expected. This applies to even brief questions, in a instant they will have given a thoughtful answer that would be shocking given the speed of the response. That is the difference between a true thinker and someone who simply has the ability to think.

Once they have the thought picked out after some exploration, they may try to poke holes into the thought all to have a deeper understanding of if they were correct. They simply want to get to the heart of the matter, so they will think about it long after the question or thought first arose. A thinker questions and plays with thoughts, entertaining them all just to see what arises. No one thought is given the maximum of 100% right. They are all treated with care to parse apart the most correct thought they can muster at any given moment. That is powerful.

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Stretching Time

When does putting in the work end? This question arises when we feel the tedium of what we are doing, or attempting to do. When we can't see the results of our actions and things feel like they aren't allowing for fruits to be collected we begin to question our actions. Are our actions having the consequences we intended? Or are we simply going through the simple action of things, not changing or improving in any manner? The place we get stuck at is here, we can not get our answers as we are stuck in a limbo.

This raises the idea of adding a certain amount of "newness" to each habit or activity, trying to keep things fresh and feeling of aliveness. Consider this project, this entire project has a sense of newness in every action, no post is the same as another. The writing has improved, the manner in which things are written has improved, of course their are stages that this is done in. Months where the writing feels the same in terms of quality. Days where the topics are extremely similar, which makes it harder to find the nuance and feel like their is improvement.

If we stretch out the time period, stretch out the length of time to be longer than can we see results? That is a better test than to say "I tried meditating for a week", "I tried this exercise routine for a week". Yes a week is nothing, we spend decades ruining our lives with habits that are terrible for us, yet we want the solution to only take a week? Isn't that a bit foolish? We stretch that week out to a month, we can see some results but when we truly see results is when we stretch that week into a year.

A YEAR, feels like an extremely long time. It feels so long. Yet 2020 passed by in a blink of an eye, 2019 passed in the blink of two eyes. Years are quick. Now some of us hate doing things, hate the fact that we have to do things everyday, but consider this math: if we spent 5 minutes a day reading, we have spent 1825 minutes in a year. 30 hours. That is almost a full work week, simply reading books. This application can be extended to anything and everything, the amount of time can be much higher as well. The point being is doing things daily has a great additive effect, a compounding effect. A new year, and perhaps even a new us. 365.25 days.

Reason for the examples of meditation and exercise are commonly used because they are problems most of us can relate to.

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Somedays the amount of work required by self imposed requirements becomes too much, the body or the mind gives out just a little bit. That is slippage. The awareness required to notice that is great, but it allows one to change their patterns of work. Perhaps go a little lighter, being fully aware of the slippage, and take the day as a more chill day, knowing the next day the efforts will be back to full force, slowly pushing the limits of what is capable - aka growing. That is what it comes down to. Being aware.

The notice of slippage allows it to be monitored, though control is difficult monitoring is easy. It allows the release of steam, to allow the steam to relax in order to recover, the consequence of pushing every day to the utmost limits is unknown as each individual is different, their is a consequence. The term consequence has negative connotations, but their are negative effects to every action, and positive actions the issue lies in our inability to gleam the future. That being said, taking the time to recover ones strength is essential in order to grow beyond the previous limits.

Allowing oneself to relax is key in order to grow beyond on the day that follows, or the week that follows. Putting in 0 effort is where the problem lies, as then resistance builds up, and that is unforgiving. It'll pile up higher than ever before quickly. Resistance will use tricks and illusions to fool, all under the guise of 'relaxing'. Increase your awareness.

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Evidence Based Thinking

When we start to believe something we may begin to search for research to support what we believe because we don't want to believe in something that is false. Wise. What do we google though? "Is ___ true?" or something to that effect, we are searching for this one thing to be true. We aren't searching for it to be false, but only true.

Consider science, when research is being conducted they search for what confirms their beliefs first, and second, and third, then glance at what rejects their beliefs (not all researchers, but most). This is human nature, we want to confirm that we are right, we want to confirm that we are filled with smartical particles. This is only human, but it makes our thoughts extremely biased, research extremely biased as no one wants to publish how their research is false, or tell themselves they are wrong. We seek to confirm. How can we ever say we gave other perspectives their time of day, when from the first second we seeked to confirm our initial belief before ever searching for the next belief? Once we have confirmed our initial belief it becomes difficult to look at the other perspectives that may disagree with our belief in a nonbaised manner.

If we do look for various evidence from different sides how do we determine how much weight it should be given, ie how true is this information? That is the question that is left, how can we trust what is being said? Perhaps the hardest question to answer because their is not a formula for this, it involves critical thinking, thinking for ourselves and thinking about the information. We must parse apart the information, thinking about the truth of this statement when compared to others, you must question your own biases. Gosh - so many little things must be brought up. This is where the leaders sit in, the true seekers of truth, not just learning to pass a test. True knowledge involves lots of questions.

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Journey Through Word

The only thing of importance for this year was writing, what a beautiful art form. Writing the way to expand and grow thoughts into tangible pieces for the consumption of others and the self. It is in writing that one can learn if they truly know something and understand it or if they simply have a shallow understanding. It is difficult. One must expand their thoughts as they write, growing out and pushing ideas further to better understand, to go deeper. It increases curiosity, it allows the mind to wander in a productive manner. The year of 2020 was the year of writing, over 60,000 words written, in less than a years time. That is the daily compounding effect of writing. As writing increases so does the ability to think as they help each other.

New ideas must be expressed and that can be done through the written word. It is also a method of expression, to express the self and perhaps help others express themselves as well. The idea that writing allows others to grow is a wonderful thing, it gives rise to new seeds of ideas being planted in the minds of all readers, from those that disagree to those that wholeheartedly agree. That is the power of the word. It is something that is free. FREE. No one will charge another to write, unless a person wishes to be charged. Writing can be done on pen and paper, or on the phone or on a computer or if craziness is what is preferred it can be done publicly such as this blog.

Writing is a blessing, it allows one to break apart the pieces of the mind for consumption, for inspection and for growth. Writing can be terrifying in some degrees as it makes things real, it brings forth the pain and truth that is being expressed, it shows the falsehoods of what is being said just as well. A person can pour over the written word for hours to figure out the meaning of what is being said. This allows for greater inspection of what is thought, a greater inspection of the self that is ever changing. Imagine going back 3 years time and reading what was written on that exact day, what kind of style it was done in. Was it angry? Was it upset? Was it joyous or curious? What was the topic on, what were the thoughts on that topic? Did the thoughts change? That is a beautiful thing, to be able to read the past as it was, not as it was remembered. Perhaps that is why journaling is so useful.

If one thing was to be done in the new year, in the next week let it be writing, perhaps not daily, perhaps not more than a sentence, but let something be written. Let something be expressed.

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Swaying Tides

Sometimes all one can do is sway with the tides, pushing against them does no good as the body is tired. Then rest, floating letting the tides move, and you with them. Let the tides do their thing as energy is being cultivated to finally push against the tide, to escape the rip tide. Patience. Pausing and breathing, then explosive movement, all to break free and travel the tides as the will commands.

The caution lies within the wanting to give up, to notice the difference between bidding ones time and giving up. This applies to everything we do, it can be difficult for us to figure out the difference at times, because we are so used to lying to ourselves. The only way we can truly know what is happening, if we are bidding our time or giving up comes from exploration of our thoughts or ideals. Increase the awareness, push beyond what is known.

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Suffering A Breath Of Life

When we think of life, we think of ourselves, but let us think of life as everything that composes this world.

Consider spores being released by a mushroom, thousands upon thousands of spores being released, but only a dozen or so growing up or a wild elephant giving birth to one baby elephant, and hoping it survives because that is all that she is capable of doing. That is suffering, that is competing to survive and to thrive beyond the world. To survive. The world is suffering, it is fighting tooth and nail, blood and sweat to have the right to exist, sitting in a chair reading this we know nothing about that. We forget what it is like outside of our comfort zone, outside in nature. How raw and dangerous everything is, how you must grow and become stronger and better in order to make it. Now a days we fall and collapse and complain about everything, that is now our suffering. We forgot about nature, and viscous, unforgiving.

Our life is a different type of suffering, it is harder in some ways, but much easier in a lot of other ways. It has intangible suffering, which is very hard to conceptualize but it is why a lot of people have depression, but when we look at rats or anything of the sort it is rare for us to see depressive behaviour in animals. Is that because they are always fighting to survive? Or is that we are just so much more evolved? Or is it our incessant thinking? These are the questions that arise. Instead of fighting the outside world, our fights are internal. We must fight ourselves, we must compete with our minds, emotions and capabilities. The outside world is of little consequence, yes it exists, yes we need to earn money, but it is different.

The fight from within is the suffering we have placed on ourselves, and this may have occurred because we need something! Something to fight against, something to push us - we need suffering in some manner. Suffering is not a bad thing, it is not feeling like shit, strip away the connotations given by the world and focus on the feelings that you have experienced perhaps when solving a difficult problem, or when working out to the absolute limit. That is suffering! That is liberating in some ways, it brings us joy once it has been surpassed. Suffering can be beautiful, not in a sadistic manner but simply in the fight to live, to become better, the human spirit in action. It is why most people cheer for the underdog. The suffering in our life, needs to be there as it gives us resistance to push against, to improve against, otherwise life becomes dull and forgetful. We never go beyond the limits that we have imposed on ourselves, or we may simply be handed everything we want in life, and end up killing ourselves because we feel our life has no purpose. Never taught how to fight for things ourselves, we will great suffering when we can, we create our own challenges. That is beautiful, the creating our own challenges and pursuing something, it means we can increase and lower the difficulty (hard to do, easy to say).

When we create a challenge for ourselves, we push ourselves a little more than the time before. The key here being making the challenge only slightly above where we max out. This allows to slowly increase our capacity without tearing ourselves apart, before falling into a pit of despair. Life is suffering, but existence is needing something to push against.

This is simply a concept taken from Charles Darwins book - The Origin Of Species, Chapter 3. Expanded with my own thoughts and ideas. It may be true, it may be false, but it was written fro the sake of thinking. Like all things written on this blog. Expand the mind and make new connections. Question it all, as hard as that might be. Question. Connect. Expand.

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Tearing Apart The Complex Reality

When we try to explain things do we try to make things more complicated than they are? Are we doing that to sound smart, or to make things harder than they are? Trying to justify our actions or justify future issues. When we think about the world are we trying to break things apart into the smallest pieces or do we just take things at face value, imagining that they are vastly complicated?

The reason for these questions begins with people who are long since dead, people who questioned the world and tried to break it all into pieces they could understand. Then of course rebuilding the world with those pieces and seeing if things end up being the same as before they broke things apart. Charles Darwin when coming up with the theory of Natural Selection went against what was commonly thought, that domesticated species originated from multiple different ancestors who were cross breed. Darwins logic started with how that would be so difficult to manage as that cross breeding would have to be done over multiple generations by our more savage ancestors. To him and now to us that is vastly more complicated than what he ended up proposing. He suggested that is more plausible that they simply breed the best for a certain trait within a single species until we had a large variation. That is much easier and simpler than finding and taming multiple different species then going through trail and error to find the best possible combination.

This is the issue we face today and have always faced, we take the more complex solution as being absolute because it is more complicated, it is harder to understand. When a more plausible and simpler explanation will do. It is also why most people when they lie give tons of details and explanations whereas someone telling the truth will give the laziest explanation or reasoning possible. The truth is much more simple than we make it out to be. If we begin to prase apart problems into what are the possible simplest solutions leads to greater positive outcomes than to find out what is a complex solution that barely works. Another issue can arise when we start adding multiple simple solutions together to form a complex solution in the hopes of being paid more, or thought of as being smart than the average. TO WHAT END??? The seeking of truth is simple, but is riddled with lies.

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Noticing: The Science Of Living

The point of quitting, the point of a lack of energy and inspiration, but the needing to keep going. If we observe ourselves well enough, we will notice that we begin to be slipping on our habits or actions, which we deemed important. We may do it with less vigor than the first few times we did the action. We may quit a little earlier, do a little less.

These are the signs of slippage, they typically go unnoticed until the spiral descent into chaos and rock bottom starts carrying itself forward, no longer caring for emotional state or actions, but going in full swing. We rarely catch ourselves slipping on the little things, but those are the things we should be paying attention to. WHen we look at our actions, we should see if our actions are becoming more precise or more lax. When attention is paid and that effort push of effort is applied when things begin to slow, we can go so much further. We allow ourselves to push past the hurdle that is slowing us down. The goal is not to never falter, but to catch ourselves when we falter. Did we tell ourselves not to touch our phones till 1pm? Then noticing the time being 12:50 justifying it's practically 1pm. In the beginning that justification was not their, we would wait till 1pm. This is the slipping that must be caught and noticed. Perhaps even laughed at. It's those little things we begin to justify and allow to pass by our barriers that cause us ruin.

Perhaps we shouldn't blame things, but blame ourselves for allowing such slack to occur, and then justifying it. This blame would of course is not helpful, but their is something within it that is helpful. Blame provides us a guide, ah look at this, ah notice this. Blame allows us to begin to pay greater attention to things. Similar to meditation and how we use us noticing that we are not focused on our breath (or whatever is picked) to focus on our breath. That is how we can use blame, or use our falters as signals to catch ourselves and redouble our efforts. It becomes less about things being bad or good, but more so a game. A game where we are both the PC(player controlled) and NPC (Nonplayer controlled). This takes away from good and bad, and puts it a framework of having fun - playing the game of life (which I know as a board game).

Pay attention to the signals that are arising, start becoming more aware of what is occurring. Simply notice, and readjust - GOSH IT IS SCIENCE! Observe, then restart the experiment, over and over again - the data collection could be in an excel sheet or within the mind. Hahahah we are all scientists when we observe and readjust, no fancy degree just simply living.

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We like to know all the exact details to every little thing, because it makes us feel good. Makes us feel safe. So we accumulate more information so that we can know everything that could go wrong. We never end up questioning if that knowledge is actually hindering us from making progress.

The information we accumulate is not known to be 100% true, it is simply the best guess that we have, or it may not even be the best guess we have, it may just be a piece of gossip running around. We then take that piece of information and end up integrating it within ourselves with the hopes that it will lead to positive outcomes, to us being more 'successful', but it might just do the opposite. So what can we trust, what do we truly know - sadly or happily we can absolutely know nothing, but we can understand and have a better idea of things by gathering information and questioning it. So gaining information isn't about the information, it is about the questions that arise from it!!!! It isn't what the information says but what questions arise from it.

Questions lead us down unexplored paths, paths that may hold secrets that we would like to know, or perhaps they will simply be fun to explore. The idea is to gather information and see what questions arise from it. These questions do not let us be omniscient but they allow us to learn more about the world and really get into the details of things. Let us begin to question the information that is being handed to us, or found by us. This does not mean being suspicious of everything, but simply be curious and allow the mind to wander.

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Distracting Focus

When we want to change things and want to improve our focus we try to do these things with only willpower. We will power through it, we have to. Nothing has changed, but we believe we have changed. This new us, has the power to do what we couldn't do before, nothing has changed though. We put our faith in our will power which has not increased from the last time we attempted to improve our focus, or to change our circumstances.

The question that may arise in this moment is, are we stuck to be the way we are forever? Perhaps that is the wrong question, perhaps the question that should be asked is what can we change that will lead to new results? When we don't want to get distracted by our phone, where do we put it? Is it in our sight line as we are trying to work? Or do we fling it across the room and thus out of sight (I am not responsible for phones flung across rooms that end up broken (don't fling, gently place - phones are expensive)). This simple change now utilizes the human laziness and thus 'increasing' our will power. We have now changed something that may lead to new results. Now we can expect things to change.

With all distractions, how easy is it for us to view the distraction, how easy is it for us to click on or go to said activity? Is the phone home screen packed with social media apps? Or are they stored away, completely away from site or just uninstalled? This little action changes the amount of effort required. The activation energy to do the thing has increased, if you have taken any basic chemistry courses, increasing the activation energy even by a little can lead to drastic results (same with lowering it).

Changing our environment to suit a new version of us, is the best manner to achieve what we want, as we are no longer waiting for willpower. We have now given ourselves an edge up on ourselves. Limiting the distractions that are around us, help us with improving our focus - it accounts for our weakness as human beings. Simply placing something over a distraction helps a lot, ie moving the junkfood in the fridge to the back, hidden behind the healthier options. This is the opposite of what grocery stores do, they move the trash up front, and the good stuff in the back - be better than them.

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Brushing Teeth

When we brush our teeth it is best to do it well, and to do it with some effort, but what if we eat food after brushing our teeth at night? Have we wasted all that effort used to brush our teeth? Now we must brush our teeth again. Do we brush with the same amount of effort as the first run through? Or can we afford to skimp on effort the second time around, because we got all of it the first time.

One could argue that the first brushing of the teeth has been voided out because of eating food afterwards; which is true. Another could argue that you scrapped away most of the gunk on your teeth, and got rid of most of the bad stuff on the first brushing, therefore the second brushing can be lighter and quicker. Which of them is correct? Both have valid arguments, but both seem to be arguing about the wrong thing. The true argument is about which outcome leads to worse results? Does brushing your teeth twice with the same amount of effort lead to worse results than brushing them quickly or vice versa?

If we brush our teeth with less effort ie faster, more sloppily then we may end up with cavities, but we saved 1 extra minute of our time, that we can then waste on Instagram. If we brush our teeth with the same vigor as the first time, we have now expanded some more energy and wasted 1 extra minute. Perhaps no cavities? Who cares about brushing, how does this matter to our lives?

It matters because brushing our teeth is important, just like working out and eating well are important. The difference is that we believe smaller acts deserve less attention, so we give them less attention. The small actions predict (does not determine) that for larger actions we will look for the easy way out, to skimp out on the workout or the healthy meal. To not brush our teeth. The amount of effort can be important but it sometimes is meaningless, what is important is that we apply the time, and care to all things we do. Simply thinking about the risk that occurs if we are careless is enough.

Highly recommended reading Fooled By Randomness By Nassim Nicholas Taleb

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Perfecting The Art Of Living

When we live and go about our life what do we think about? What are we trying to get to? The goal of living for most people is to be happy, to find a purpose but what if we took that idea and flipped it around? The goal of living is building a life worth living.

A life worth living means different things to different people, but that is the whole purpose of it, we are trying to build something for US. The life we lead isn't for anyone else, it isn't for our friends, our mothers or fathers, it is for us. It doesn't matter what they believe a life should be, though it can provide direction to ourselves, what matters is us, and what we want our life to be. Where do we want to be in 50 years, or 10 years, what kind of person do we want to be? How can we be content with ourselves? Instead of being full of regret. That may be the best guiding question.

The kicker is that that question when applied to any action has a very obvious answer, but are we willing to listen and alter our behavior accordingly? Or will we listen to the answer then do what we want to do anyways? This question is a guide, but which can assist in solving a problem but at the end of the day it is up to us to apply the solution, and to get down in the mud. We must be willing to work in the dirt, and to get shit done. We must be able to look at ourselves objectively and treat ourselves and the stuff we are doing accordingly.

The goal is to begin to build a life we would be willing to live, the habits we can live with and actions that would make us happy. Sometimes we can't think 10 or 50 years into the future and who we want to be, and then we must simply go with the smallest time scale that we can conceive. This may be a single month or a few days in advance, the goal is to improve things for our future self continuously. We will have to live with ourselves for a long time, best to do it with a self that puts in the effort.

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The Difference Of Effort

When we look around and try to decide when to stop or when to quit we should look at the effort applied. The amount of effort we apply before walking away from something is important. If sufficient effort was not applied then how could we expect success? The idea of success may lie on luck but it also lies on effort and attempts made. So aren't we being unfair to ourselves when we say "we have failed", wouldn't that be like shooting a sleeping horse?

The idea of quitting relies upon sufficient effort being applied before ruling something a failure, but what if the entire thing that was being worked on is despised and simply hated? Then quit. Change. But to quit something that you truly want because you feel like it will fail by only putting 10% effort in is... well sad.

We like to walk away from things that are difficult or hard before we have given them a fair chance and thus leave with a sour taste in our mouths instead of learning and adapting. If we took the time to learn and actually become comfortable with the task then it may just flow smoothly and we may end up loving it. The problem arises when we decide to give it no effort and then end up quitting and saying it doesn't work. This may not seem like a problem but as we rise up in the world we give others permission to rise up as well, so when we fall down we give others permission to stagnate and become like us.

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Building The Mental Emporium

When we admire those who think beyond what we have ever thought, or those that can parse apart a problem in seconds just by quickly going their steps we are amazed. We question how we can become like them in the manner they think and solve problems, but the issue arises when we don't wish to go through that mental effort to care out a path.

The people we admire become the way they are because of the constant effort that was applied to think like they do, to break down the problems that arise. They had to put in those reps, those iterations of consciously thinking about things, but at some point it became a flywheel. The habit of breaking things down and thinking things through became automatic, going through the flowchart they setup in their minds just became automatic. It is no longer thought about, it is simply done. Unconsciously. That is the beauty of going through various iterations over and over again, and applying that effort in the start.

The initial effort that is required to build up that beautiful thinking is costly, and we a human beings look to apply the minimum effort to get the results we want. This leads us to avoiding thinking through problems, or questioning things, we would rather follow or just give in because it involves no thinking. No thinking is the best, in a biological and evolutionary way. This implies that thinking through things and breaking apart problems to find their essence is against our nature (not everyone of course, but most of us).

We must consciously apply the effort until it becomes automatic and thus costing us very little effort.

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Taking Stock

When in the year (if ever) do we take stock of how far we have come? When do we take stock of where we are heading or the stuff we own? We could use the excuse that we don't have time, and that time is running out, why waste it on a day of reflection or contemplating? Imagine making a work area clean and efficient, thus improving productivity in the long run. Or perhaps simply the peace of mind of knowing where everything is.

We believe that movement is a good thing. That when we are running, we are getting somewhere, we are moving closer to something but what if you are running on a treadmill? Or riding a stationary bike? Energy is being exerted, but movement is not occurring, yet it feels like we are making progress. That is the nail in the coffin, we feel like we are making progress. The idea that we are getting better and that we are moving, makes us never take stock or reflect on what we are doing. If what we are doing is actually helpful, or if it is holding us back. We mus take stock in order to know if we are moving, and then we must be aware if we are moving in the direction we want our life to go in. Not all movement is good. Sometimes moving in a negative direction, allows us to realize we are moving in the wrong way, but most times we simply slip and then slip slid away (song: Slip Slidin' Away by Paul Simon). The idea of taking time each month or week, even twice a year allows us to reflect on the direction we are headed and if we want to correct that direction.

Doing these reflections involves looking at the progress that has been made, looking at the current state of our life when compared to the past, the habits we are doing and if those things are leading to a future us that we want to become. This is best done with sheets of paper and a pen, writing down where we have been, where we are and where we want to be going - then editing our life to live in accordance with that. Something that allows us to switch directions for a downward spiral to an upward spiral is completely altering the space we live in. When we switch how our space looks and feels, we allow ourselves to have a new beginning. Tricking the mind into believing that this is a new place, thus a time for new changes and behaviours. All change comes down to first tricking the self into a new way of being, or being hyper aware.

Take stock.

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The Feeling Of A Habit

Today I did not feel like writing. The plan for today did not include writing. Writing was not meant to occur today, it was simply too much of a hassle. No topic arose, no inspiration to write arose, but YOU are reading words today, why is that?

The feeling of doing this action, writing, did not occur but something else occurred in its place. That feeling was "well, I did it for so many days in a row, might as well keep going". That might as well keep going, THAT IS A HABIT! That is what we all strive to create, a force that can not be stopped, a force that keeps going, even when you don't feel like it. The same thing is occurring with working out, the force of continuously doing it every single day makes it happen. To stop doing the actions is more costly than just throwing some shit together and doing your best. The concept of habit formation is at it's peak right here, as these words are being written. This is what is meant by forming a habit, this may be the first time I experienced such a thing so strongly.

Maybe the idea of changing ones life does not come from many habits but the single addition of 1 habit, the formation of a single habit. When that feeling of "I've done it so many times in a row, fuck it - let's do it today too", is experienced, it builds the urge to have that feeling with other habits that are forming. That is the magic of habits, wow, that is the magic of habits. It isn't about flipping your life in swoop, but adding things and subtracting other things, slowly forming a better version of yourself. As I type this, I feel the urge to flip my life all at once and get everything moving in the direction I want it to move, which is hilarious because of the previous sentence.

The essence of doing led to this simple post, this tremendous realization that was known with words, but never felt.

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Right Decision - Replication Of The Past

There is currently a terrible thing happening in China (see links in notes section) and this is worse than what the Nazises did before World War 2. When we look back at that time in history we begin to think why didn't anyone stop them? Why wasn't there unified actions taken against them? Then we have the excuse that they didn't have the news like we do now. Something like that would never be allowed to happen, we are much too civilized and have grown a lot, yet it does occur. It is occurring.

We begin to start having to make moral choices, on who we want to be, and these choices are not easy. They will inconvenience our lives. The real issue is most of us are nobodies, we can't do anything against a government, we can't do much to influence the world. Thoughts Of Contemplation maybe reaches 2 or 3 readers (who aren't me hahahaha), but the thing is something must be done, a stance in someway must be done against injustice. Typically when a company or someone wrongs the world, or isn't doing ethical things we let our money speak for us, we stop buying their products. We allow our money, our few dollars to speak for us, but what about an entire nation?

How do you stop buying from an entire nation that supplies everything you own, that practically every company outsources to. That is the dilemma, what are your few hundred dollars going to amount to when compared to the billions going in. Here is another question, and this is where it gets juicy. What if you were to start a company, and outsource to China for two reasons, one you can now compete with your competition and two you can make more money. Now the thinking here is the more money you make the more influence is acquired. Paying 10,000 to china, but making 100,000 in the states, that is a net positive. Yet the machine is still being fueled. Are the companies actions now ethical and justified? The scale can be increased, the amount of money made per dollar spent could be even higher, would that make it more ethical?

The problem arises with what is the right thing to do, there is power in money, but also we prefer convience? Everything we purchase on amazon comes from China, so do we forgo Amazon a US company. This thinking doesn't just apply to ou0r current circumstances but to future ones and the past. At what point do we become the problem, or at what point do we become the solution?

I don't know, this is something I am struggling with, feel free to tweet me responses, would love some insight.

Reddit comment
Washington Post Article On AI facial recognition software targeting minorities
BBC - Inside China's 'thought transformation' camps

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The Trick Of Youth

The younger we are the important it becomes not to quit things because they are difficult. Not to quit things because we get bored or are tired. It is always important, but instilling that habit when we are younger allows us to get dividend checks sooner on it. When we set the time to work on something for 30 minutes, we should work on that thing for that time, it is keeping that promise to ourselves that makes us respect ourselves.

The folly of youth is that we are young. We believe we have all the time in the world, their is always tomorrow. Tomorrow. Ah, another tomorrow. Bam, double decker bus hits us, puts us in a coma, 6 months later we are in physical rehab, and their is no more tomorrow. There is only today. We begin to rebuild ourselves to what we were previously, not taking anything for granted, because we could have grown so much, but instead chose to think of the next day as the day we would give it our all. That is the trick of being full of youth, we believe that saying we will do it tomorrow means we have done the action, and thus reward ourselves today.

We do deserve a break and time to relax of course, it's important to enjoy the moment. When will we think about our future selves, and even our current selves? Will we put in the work and effort required for us to be proud of ourselves, or fall for the trick of youth - believing we have all the time in the world. The problem really lies in our thinking of micro and macro, in the macro we should be slow and patient, in the micro we should be quick and fast. Meaning in the moment to moment we should give it our all and expect the best from ourselves, but in the macro to expect change to occur over time. Instead of giving ourselves 4 weeks to get into the best shape of our lives, giving ourselves 6 months or a 1 year. Slow in the macro. Yet we should be working out everyday and stop binge eating. Fast in the micro.

It is true, we do have time, we always do but time slips through our fingers like the sand of the Sahara, unable to be bottled whole but only grasped for a moment.

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Perspective Differential

The thinking that we are the center of this world, is nearly psychopathic. We assume that people care that we tripped and fell, or that we 'bothered' them by asking 'how are you doing'. We think the world cares about our little blunders and that we are at fault when something goes wrong (anxiety), but that ideology seems so self-centered. Anxiety comes from us believing that things are worse, or the world will think less of us because of our actions. Doesn't that constrain us? Limiting us to do nothing.

The belief that our words and actions have an impact allows us to change the world. The belief that our words and actions have an impact stops us from doing what we want. Both statements are true, sometimes at the same time, sometimes in different circumstances. Where is the edge that we must ride? For the most part it is a switching of perspective. Maybe that girl you messaged was busy and couldn't respond that day? Put yourself in her shoes (expect perhaps a bit bigger), if that fails put yourself in your own shoes. Think about the times you didn't respond, or when you were extremely busy. It's the shift of perspective from "I am the problem" to "ah this is something that happens with me". This thinking can be applied to everything.

The problem isn't you, or them, or anyone. The problem lies in the perspective that is chosen, the more perspectives one has collected, the easier life becomes. Switching one perspective for another, to another until a firm grasp of the situation has been had. That the beauty of the mind, it is not made out of unyielding stone, but out of supple clay. Clay that can be molded into whatever shape that is desired. One may think stone is unyielding, but if water begins dripping at one spot on the stone, the stone will yield. We may be dead, and may not see the end result, but the stone will bear a hole within it.

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Conversing Through The Madness

When we discuss things with others, perhaps a heated discussion over the quality of cold and hot water should we be worried about the other persons feelings - if we are only attacking the actual discussion points? The goal of a discussion or an argument is to understand the other persons position better and create some common ground.

The actual problem isn't the discussing, it is when a person argues for the sake of arguing. This is a common phenomena, where there are people who simply like playing the devils advocate, thus destroy the idea of building common ground. Devil's advocate is important when trying to find new perspectives from the otherside. It has it's uses, but for the most part it is overused and simply has ego associated with it! If we are in a discussion with those we love and care about, shouldn't we speak openly? If the purpose of a discussion to understand another better, wouldn't that strength the relationship with another person?

We have the idea that discussions are actually a bad thing, that they are done simply to get under anothers skin, but if they were used for the purpose of trying to understand anothers view point, they are actually getting closer to each other. The moment we begin to understand another, and feel their perspective we have now opened our minds and sometimes our hearts to them, thus allowing us to let go of the ego, and really go deep into a discussion. The deep thoughts that conspire between between people can lead to fruitful results, when it's done openly and contemplated. Ideas evolve through use, and contemplation of the use. Consider social media, all these apps have an idea, they implement said idea, and then gather data and thus you have the instagram of today, or the reddit of tomorrow.

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The Unnecessary Evil

The justification in modern day stress is that it makes one work, and actually get things done, but what are the consequences for such things? At what cost is someone getting less sleep, is more stressed and failing to take care of themselves, a good thing? Now some may point out to some of the greatest people in the world, and in history had the most amount of stress. At the risk of sounding idiotic, how many people out of a million truly thrive on stress? How many great people truly utilize stress for success? How many people simply begin to drown and start pulling others down with them?

The cost to society for unnecessary stress to be 'productive' is quite high for the returns that are received. The ROI of high stress is a high negative. Students use deadlines and the stress of them coming closer to get themselves to work, thus constantly being under stress so they can get work done. This constant stress leads them to sleep less, not able to truly let go and enjoy a moment, all because they are constantly behind. The ideology being if behind, then forward.

What about pushing ones limits? What about growth, a pressure is needed!!!! Says who? Science? Evolution? Sure, pressure (stress) is necessary, but the amount and the consistency forces us to adapt and to perhaps evolve as a species, but into what? Do we evolve or adapt into nervous wrecks, with a few people being able to rein in the bull we call stress, and ride it to the finish line. These questions become important because our lives are heavily influenced with stress, and most of us justify why stress is necessary. Stress may be necessary in short bursts, because it allows us to easily prioritize things. It was probably really necessary when life was very difficult, where we had to hunt a lion, then run away from a leopard, or a wombat, but even then it came in spikes. See threat, react. What threat are you looking for constantly?

Stress can be used as a tool, but it should not be our primary weapon to fight off procrastination or to improve our lives. The second we keep it as a companion, right by our sides at all times, we give up on truly living. If we were handed a billion dollars (no need to stress, that billion is tax free), we would still be stressed. We are so focused on living on stress to get where we need to go, that when we get there we don't know how to let go of that stress.

Stress becomes addictive, when overused (or over experienced). We don't know how to live without it, when everything is said and done. We will constantly feel it, because it was constantly there, it was our 'good' buddy. The buddy that is too clingy, and will drag you off the ship, because if it can't have you, no one can.

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Randomness In Success

We like to think that we are more powerful than we actually are, that we have more control than we do. All to say that we did it ourselves, until of course things go wrong. We like to blame negative things on randomness, that they were unforeseen, or we justify it with logic we do not have. We can not be wrong, but the world can. We are all powerful.

That is the problem that lies within us, we like to believe that when we win that it had nothing to do with luck or randomness. Isn't that foolish? Sometimes we are in the right time or place to make use of an opportunity that was presented to us, but what if we were 10 mins too late? What if we simply didn't think of the opportunity as viable? Or better yet we could have simply said "FUCK IT. Let's do it." The manner in which we reach the places we do, has a lot to do with random things happening and simply working out. This isn't to take away from ones hard work, and effort that has been applied but to simply acknowledge that their is something more needed. Naval on his thread on "How To Get Rich" talks about how to remove luck as a factor from success, thus if we were to run a Monte Carlo engine we would be rich in 99% of possible outcomes and poor in 1 - where luck didn't care about hard work. It is hard for us to say when we were lucky and when we simply beat the odds due to betting on everything (hahahah, a good joke lies in here - betting on all the ponies, that way you don't lose).

So what occurs when we are right and it is based on luck? We begin to find the logic that we did not have beforehand, we begin to place pieces into the world that didn't exist. This is where hindsight is so useful, we whip up all these reasons that we now can see to tell the world, why we are smart. The ego that grows within us when we do this, can lead to people resenting us and wanting our downfall, along with just general resentfulness. It is completely okay to admit that luck was a large factor, and you are thankful. Nobody despises the man that got lucky and knows it, most despise the man that got lucky and refuses to admit it.

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Karmic Balance - Keepin it 100

When we use the word "Karma" we typically mean that their is a universal score board that has a tally of good and bad actions, which keeps everything balanced. The meaning of "Karma" roughly means "It is your doing". This meaning implies actions have consequences, and that is how we get the preverbal score board. What does the actual definition of "Karma" mean for us?

It means that is done, is our doing, this can be interpreted in many ways. We could assume that we are the decision makers in all our actions, or we could assume that what is done will be done, being two of the possible options. Both of these assumptions lead to the result that we should not be complaining about what is occurring because it was our doing in the end that lead to whatever we are complaining about. Our doing!

Perhaps we decided not to make a decision yet on some potential opportunities, well that is a decision. Our doing.

When we take on the idea of karma, it is more about keeping everything 100, actions having consequences and all of that is our responsibility. It is our actions that leads to something to occur. This could be out of our control, ie habit energy keeping us doing the same actions, but that is still our doing. It isn't a defense to say "I have a habit of killing of people. It's not my fault." It is important to note that not doing, is also doing. We are choosing not to do something, thus still being a decision. This becomes very interesting with the problem of a train going down the tracks and an old lady is tied down to one of the possible paths, and a group of children tied down to another path. Some people default to doing nothing, because then they have no influence over who lives and who dies, but... Doing nothing is still doing. The consequences of not doing, are the same as doing in terms of keeping everything 100

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Carried To The Throne

Their is a saying that states that the process is what you need to have faith in, yet what makes this process different than another process? In e-commerce like everything else there are multiple processes to get to a final result, or that proceed forward in some manner, yet we are told to trust this single process as being the best one. Why would this process be the one that carries us to our thrones? Why couldn't it be doing a different process?

We like to associate positive results to tangible things, like a process so that others can feel like they can replicate it and achieve the same thing. That is wonderful, it can be packed and sold - who doesn't like making money? To be fair these processes are important, because they provide a framework for people to follow/copy/learn from, but that isn't the glass slipper. The glass slipper is the belief in self.

When someone believes in themselves it doesn't matter the process they follow (alright, it matters a little bit, some processes are faster, others are slower - good for you, you smartass hahahaha), they will make progress in the direction they are headed. If someone believes they can break through a steel wall, simply by continuously hitting their head in the same spot over and over again, again and again, they will. It may be extremely slow, and painful in the beginning, learning how much strength to put into each hit, but they will break a small hole into it. Consider stone steps in ancient buildings, or even wooden steps in an old home, those steps have sunken. They have been woren away by constant footsteps - this lacks belief, but has consistency. The same thing would happen with the steel, perhaps it takes 1 month, or 10 years, their will be a hole in that steel then it'll be pulled apart. It is the belief and the consistency with a process that creates magic.

It is possible that this person with a belief that they will make it, switches processes a lot to find the best way to break through a steel wall, but they will be consistent in that and won't stop until the wall is broken. Of course it may have been faster simply to continuously hit their head in the same spot, than to always be seeking different processes. Though the real question is which one is more fun?

Belief and consistency are not both needed. Consistency is necessary, and belief simply allows you to become consistent, and when it feels hopeless consistency carries you through. They help each other, thus helping the end user of those two tools.

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Asymptotically Zero

When we work on something consistently we are attempting to get the resistance of doing that thing to zero, but never can be completely defeated. Our consistency in whatever the habit/action leads to a decrease in resistance whilst also causing a decrease in amount of effort required to sustain the activity. Why is decreasing resistance asymptotically to zero important?

The reason why that question occurs is because we view resistance as an additional amount of effort required, why is awn additional of 1 or 3 or 5 units of effort so important? Simple, because resistance is not additional, it is multiplier. This is so goddamn important to realize. Imagine dealing with 20% effort to workout with a 0.001 resistance(after a month, maybe three of consistent effort), nearly effortless to start the task, we begin it. Now imagine that same workout at 20% effort with a resistance of three, now it isn't effortless to BEGIN, it is a whole ordeal. The argument of "Oh I can do it tomorrow", the excuses not to do the task increase by so much!!! Now the task will be put off for another day, the resistance increases to 3.2, now the amount of willpower/effort has increased. You yourself have not increased your will power. People who are depressed haven't done the actions that serve them in a long time, so the resistance is so fucken high that they continuously push it away, stating they will do it when they feel better...

Resistance does not care what state a person is in. A depressed person may have a multiplier of 100 or 200, the amount of initial effort may be increased as well. Now how can we expect anyone to overcome that alone? Fuck. Even with help. This is the problem with resistance. It always increases exponentially (not always, but most times), getting it down to ALMOST zero is huge! When you stop feeling like doing an activity the resistance level will be so low that you might just end up doing it. Or perhaps the activity isn't done for a few days (see post Skipping A Day), the resistance even if exponential will not be that high(if it is already asymptotically close to zero). The task may still be taken up the following day, but as time goes on the task will become harder and harder to do.

Start viewing resistance and excuses as a multiplier to effort and not simply an addition.

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Bound By Rules

When we start playing a game or learning a new skill we are bound by the rules that are clearly defined. This is the only way we can learn and grow, becoming better at the task at hand. We must know the rules, the common way people do things in order to find the subtle changes that need to be made.

When most people learn how to cook they follow recipes, once comfort sets in with those recipes they begin to play around with them. This playing involves adding new flavours, trying to enhance the dish. Children will go into a kitchen and throw things together hoping for the best. Throwing things together is inefficient in terms of making a good dish, but allows one to learn new ways ingredients can go together. They start by exploring outside the rules and as they get older they are start learning the rules, knowing which ones they can break and which they can not.

Adults do things differently, we learn the rules first then we learn how to play with them, and break them. This applies to anything we are doing. We want to produce something half-decent or attempt to win the game so we follow the rules, but what should happen once we have learned the rules?

Once the basics have been learned and the rules memorized (ideally understood), then the fun begins! We can start playing around with the rules, doing things that are frowned upon but work. The questions and curiousity can rise up, and begin to look for the cracks. In chess it's helpful for beginners to focus on controlling the center of the board, but once you have gotten sufficiently good at the game, you begin to control the middle without your pieces being in the middle. To a novice this will look silly, and against what they learned. Once we have learned the rules, we are no longer bound by them. We can explore the various crevices and the edges of everything, learning what is safe and what is not. This also applies to taxes, once an accountant knows the rules and regulations they know the grey area they can play in, they are no longer bound by the rules - they are only bound by the laws.

Become comfortable with the rules and the norms of things, just so you know you can break them and explore the world more freely.

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Veracity Of The Norm

Truth is extremely perspective based thus leading to multiple variations of 'truth'. Finding the truth matters more about looking at something from various perspectives than from looking from one perspective for a long time. What does this mean for new things we have learned or heard about?

It means that we must ask the question "Is this the truth?". Is it true from the current perspective, if yes, then what about this other perspective. If no, make a mental note and then look from a different perspective. The key here is to continuously search for where something is true and where it is not. This will provide a full picture of what is true. In the beginning this train of thought costs a ton of mental resources in order for us to get familiar with a new idea, and for us to get into this pattern of questioning and thinking. The key is to slowly bring awareness, and questioning what is true. This can be done for things that are considered normal, or things that have been believed for a long time. We prefer the things that we can just swallow without chewing and digesting.

We should be voracious for the truth from as many perspectives as possible. Searching to find the edges of it, where things are fuzzy and exploring that area. We agree that the color blue is blue, but what happens when we increase the brightness of the room that the blue is in? What happens when we turn down the lights? Are these blues in these various states still the same? The answer yes and the answer no, both seem to be correct, and that is where the truth lies. It lies in the yes, and the no. In the black and the white. The key for us as human beings is to explore the different angles, to create depth in a 2d question.

We prefer the 2d over the 3d as we can easily compute it, this is why when we take physics in our younger years we never touch 3d, or 4d. When we learn shapes, we learn the 2d shapes first then move onto 3 dimensions, then perhaps 4 dimensions, the goal should be to see the same object (shape) from multiple perspectives. This gives you 3 dimensions, then nth dimensions of understanding. Think about playing paper mario, it is a 3 dimension game setup as a 2 dimensional game, as if it was written on paper. (see this as an example shared by Corey Gwin

Our goal should be to seek the truth not to seek what is the norm. Walk in different directions and see what others have not found, or find the things that have been forgotten long ago.

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If Error, Select Defaults

What are the defaults of your life? When something goes wrong, or right what state of mind or habits do you default to? This is who you are, the things you default to, is what the mind is comfortable with and what the body is used to, thus it hinders any progress being made in anything.

Things usually go wrong, and when they do our defaults either protect us from falling or help us fall faster (for most people falling faster is a bad thing). Our defaults are our habits that have been ingrained in us, and they are our lifeline or our anchor in the rough seas. This is why they are so damn important. Habits are the things that we will begin to automatically do when things get terrible, and most of us view habits as things that will launch us forward. Being launched forward is great, but an even greater motivator for creating good habits is so we don't crash to rock bottom.

Humanbeings are more afraid of negative consequences than positive ones, it's why we hate losing money more than we love gaining money. When crafting habits, think about the negative consequences of your current habits. Think about falling to rock bottom. Then think about the positive aspects of these future habits. How good life will become. Our defaults determine how far we fall and high we can soar, because they protect us from sudden changes in life.

Think about the habits that are ingrained within yourself. Would they sink you or hold you above water? Those habits that are ingrained are your defaults, it is what is resorted to when things go wrong, or when things blessedly right.

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Status Delirium

We spend time trying to chase this allusive thing called status, yet the question of what is it that we are truly chasing never comes up. Are we trying to chase this feeling of being superior to another or a sense of security that the people we care about will be taken care of. What is this thing called status?

The definition from Oxford Languages is "the relative social, professional, or other standing of someone or something", so does status mean that we wish to be favorably favored when compared to the next person? Now we don't need to be favorable in all standings, just some. Even if we simply want to be favorable in one standing, money, then doesn't that make everyone competition? Everyone is the enemy. This erodes the trust between each individual. We are left with just ourselves against the world, against a tree, against a brother or a sister. Everyone becomes the enemy as to be a higher status individual means to beat out the majority of people, but no one wants to be in 3 or 100th place, we have to be first. First out of eight billion (for reference - 8,000,000,000 - a lot of 0s...). Of course if you are reading this you are beating at least 3.5 billion, as they don't have internet (at least not yet, starlink might just change that). Now to be first in status it is imperative or at least top 1,000, fuck it top 10,000.

How does comparing ourselves to others make most of us feel? If we compare upwards, bad, if we compare downwards fandoodlytastic. Now our value is determined by those whom we are being compared to. What about who we are inherently? "What about ME, JIM, I have value!!!". This comparison game whenever played strips us of our value, and then puts as a digit in an impossible game of being the highest. It is no longer about safety or security, it is about being the 'best', to out compete everyone and everything - seems stressful. If we had a lottery that a thousand people (1,000) could be happy out of eight billion (8,000,000,000), would you play that lottery? Or would the idea of saying "fuck that lottery, I'll do it myself" appear?

Once we strip away status and strip away comparison, we are no longer playing the lottery, we are stuck with comparing ourselves to our past selves - a much easier game to win. If we then strip that away and compare ourselves to no one, then we have defaulted to winning the game. No longer confined to the terms of others or the past versions of ourselves. We have full autonomy. The chase for status leads us to fumble around - this chase could be for anything, as it is all a comparison game.

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Indecision leads us to never starting, to never being willing to grow or expand our thoughts and beliefs. We are too busy trying to nail perfect, but perfect is a hard thing to nail when we haven't even begun. So begin, today. The longer something is put off, the harder it becomes, see post The Building Up Of Resistance.

Once we get our feet wet, we can better establish a direction. Getting the lay of the land as we land, yes research is important, but not more important than doing. Begin and follow the path that appears.

The reason for this short post is because fuck it's that simple, there are other posts on this topic written on this blog - so many, this was just a reminder.

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Stoicism In Man

In the previous post "Dealing With The Scars Of The Past" it was mentioned how men deal with emotional pain by pushing it aside and suppressing emotions that arise and that is what they believe it means to be a stoic, unflinching forever - that is an answer, but it is not the correct answer.

Stoicism is different for every single person who believes in it, but in general it is regulating emotions and not allowing emotions to cause reactions - this does not involve pushing them aside. It typically involves acknowledging the emotion and the cause of it, and then funneling or letting go of that emotion - letting go and pushing aside are two vastly different actions. When we push aside an emotion we refuse to acknowledge it and give it space along with it being a forceful action, whereas letting go acknowledges what is and then allows the thing to pass just like all things do. Calling suppression and forcefulness in trying to control the emotions that are arising stoicism is the same as calling a forest fire, a snowstorm - if you don't understand the difference between the two, then it is completely reasonable to use the words interchangeably.

Stoicism involves the constant understanding that emotions are not ours and they are simply passing by, changing at all times; acknowledging that emotions come and go as they wish, rising up for any number of reasons or not reasons, and then moving onwards. It is less about force and more about Tao (pronounced Dao), it is going with the flow not against it - in a sense an observational and free flowing path.

Now the modern man fucks up in the sense that they believe that being in control of their emotions means to suppress, and so they boil with rage, hate, and pain because what is suppressed, wants freedom. Imagine a small jail cell, and every emotion that is suppressed is stuffed into that cell, how many could you fit before the sheer pressure of them all being in them leads them to break free and explode? This is what occurs when we suppress emotions without every trying to resolve them and let go of them - all doors must open, otherwise they are walls.

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Dealing With The Scars Of The Past

The one thing almost everyone has is scars from the past some physical and others emotional/mental, but the question is did they properly heal, or are they simply festering with puss and ugliness? The approach we take in the process of healing is vitally important but varies from person to person, with a general theme.

When physical injuries are in the mix, we typically go to a doctor or clean the wound and then bandage it up (if you are wise hahaha), this allows our body to inherently repair itself back to the former self. This occurs in stages and takes time, depending on the the depth and significance of the wound, but over time it'll repair the damage taken. A very straight forward process because it can be seen with the naked eye. Now what about emotional scars or injuries (funny thing, I could feel the deepest scar I've received throb at writing that)?

Emotional injuries are much harder to see and thus much harder to repair because we as people have the ability to trick ourselves, fooling ourselves into believing they have healed when really they were simply ignored and pushed aside. The approach men take (what society expects) is that we suppress and immediately are fine with any emotional or internal damage taken, if an arm isn't detached forcibly we should not complain. This approach leads a lot of young men to avoid their pain and to kill it with meanness, as time passes the wounds become infected and lashing out begins or a depression begins to form - though of course we do not explore that, so we think it is very random that this is occurring if we even notice.

When an emotional or internal wound occurs it is fine to be strong within the moment and not to react, like a warrior in a battlefield, no weakness, but once we are off the battlefield, away from the situation we should not be avoiding the wound. Once we are safe and sound, perhaps alone or perhaps with close friends we should face that internal wound. This involves acknowledging the pain and perhaps closing your eyes and trying to locate where it aches when we think about it - of course sometimes we need space and time before approaching the wound and trying to deal with it. We can write what is happening within us, what hurt us and how, and what the consequences of the hurt ie where the scars are forming, what is making the wound worse. Then putting yourself first and removing what is making it worse.

Cleaning the wound is different for everyone, but it always begins with acknowledging the pain and the wound, after that it is up to the individual to figure out what would repair the wound, most of the time it has stages, acknowledging the wound, cleaning the wound, bandaging the wound, maintenance of the bandages and some kindness, very similar to the steps that are more commonly found in the 12 Steps Of Alcoholics Anonymous. The steps are broken up even more, but the same steps can be applied to our internal wounds and emotional scars.

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Clinging To The Cloth

We cling to anything we can find in order to hold onto ourselves, this involves clinging to beliefs, to religion, to the fact we like mcdonalds or that we are vegan. These labels are our identity and thus limit us and provide us with comfort. We are no longer nobody, we are someone who beliefs such and such, and therefore we are better or worse than another person - we know who we are. Clinging to things allows us to pretend that we are exerting some power over things and thus we are controlling those things, but it is all a feeble attempt at pretending that we we have control. The second we identify with a thing and hold onto that label, we give up our true power which is the ability to adapt and change to fit a situation. We limit ourselves to that thing, instead of allowing ourselves to be free, swapping labels whenever a label or a belief doesn't fit. Then we may be stuck with the question "If I am not my labels, or my beliefs then who am I?", isn't that a great question? Scary yes, but a great question none the less.

When we let go of clinging to other things we are much more free to explore our own experiences and who we may or may not be. This can be a scary endeavor because we don't want to find out we may be extremely selfish or end up destroying the illusionary self that we have created. Of course it could be the most freeing thing in the world, because you are truly discovering yourself and all the parts of you - this involves a ton of self reflection and awareness, but it is one of the most beautiful things in the world. Cut the clothes that are clung to, and begin to discover yourself, it isn't iphone or android, it isn't windows or linux, it is whatever it is, but it can't be placed in a neat little box.

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It is easy to make the assumption that habits and skills that we have do not decay over time, we like to think that the second we stop and the second we pick something back up are within the same minute, but they are not. As we stop doing something time begins to erode and decay our efforts, whether positive or negative, the decay will continuously occur - some things will have a slow decay and other things a rapid decay. A new skill or habit being formed has a tremendously higher decay rate than an old habit that has been ingrained. That is why we must double down into something in the beginning and continue doubling down on it if we want it to be apart of our life, until it has been etched into our bones. When we avoid something because we have a fear of being bad at something we are simultaneously getting worse at it, as decay can easily bring us back to 0 or even into the negatives as our good habits slip away and thus are replaced with bad habits.

Time will dull everything that is not being sharpened constantly, the second we stop doing something consistently we are being dulled from our sharpened state. This isn't a problem if it is something that is a bad habit, or a quick dopamine hit that we don't need, but it is quite the bad thing when it is a good habit (the word habit can be replaced with any word that suits your needs). The thing that we need to maintain is a consistent effort to maintain the sharpness, and if we want to get even sharper we need constant and ever increasing effort and nuance - nuance becomes important once a basic level of understanding has been achieved, because then it is possible to parse apart all the minute details of a topic, this helps solidify knowledge and slow down the rate of decay.

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Treat Yourself

Most of us fail to acknowledge our successes and thus we do not take the time to celebrate and treat ourselves to something that is precious to us. We would rather push ourselves into the next thing, because we are "busy", so we run to the next thing, not knowing that what lies around corner may be this thing called burnout. The rush from one thing to the next thing causes us to not appreciate what we have accomplished. The celebration may simply be getting ourselves a cake, or it may be taking the day to watch your favorite movies, to each us it will be something different, but the important thing is that we are treating ourselves. This really builds on the idea of treating ourselves as if we are children, it is important to praise children (ourselves) when they (we) accomplish something worth while - this could be a big project we have been working on, or it could be something small like working out everyday for a month (word to the wise don't skip that workout, but perhaps go a little lighter).

An issue arises when we do things and we believe they aren't worth celebrating, and we think everything isn't worth celebrating thus we run from one thing to the next to the next - not taking any time to appreciate the great things we have achieved. This issue builds up as time goes on, because it stops us from being able to accept praise or even acknowledgment of the hard work we put in. The key is to strike a balance within ourselves, by allowing ourselves to acknowledge our efforts and achievements.

Treat yourself well, and allow yourself to relax and chill when an important milestone (TO YOU) has been reached.

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Authority Of Self

We try to own others and things to show our self-worth or to show our authority on a subject, but this can easily be forced by being overly aggressive or by putting others down, none of these provide true self-worth, nor do they provide authority over the self. These outlets of 'authority' are simply to fill a void, to show the world "I am not weak", but those who have authority over themselves can easily see this behaviour and it's toxicity. If we are the person whom lacks self authority then how can we fix this or repair it? This question involves putting in effort into the self, into who we are - for most of us, it involves tearing down the manner in which we live and to rebuild from the foundation up, this can be a problem when we as people don't want to be patient. We want solutions now, we want to get the drug that will solve all our problems instantly, we rarely want the drug that will fix us within 2 to 5 years - now isn't that a bitch? Our own refusal to slowly improve ourselves and to fix our habits and the manner in which we spend our time is what holds us back more than anything else; consider this: time passes no matter what you do. Getting this through our thick skulls can be difficult, so it bares repeating - TIME PASSES NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO!

This idea that time passes no matter what you do, is important because we could do something we dislike that future us would thank, or we could do something we enjoy that future us would hate us for. Time will pass just the same, so what we do in that time matters, it matters so much. If we think about how we can rebuild ourselves into someone who can be proud of themselves and own themselves, what is 2 years, what is 5 years? That time will pass anyways, so fixing ourselves should be our top priority - rebuilding ourselves into whom we can be proud of, and not something that can be holding into origami when we don't wish to be a paper crane.

Quick Start Guide To Repairing The Self:
Rebuild the manner in which you live, consider the aspects of your being, mental, physical and spiritual (let's throw in financial as well).

- Mental:
Read books, spend 10-30 minutes reading a day (Personally I would pick Letters From A Stoic by Seneca - Translation by Robin Campbell). Then add in an aspect of learning a skill or doing work that is meaningful that involves building a skill; here are some examples: Coding, Pottery, Digital Design, blacksmithing, sewing, growing a business (or pursuing a business idea). That is it for mental.

- Physical
Workout, workout once a day for 20 to 35 minutes - just go as hard as possible for that day. Now a gym is not necessary, there exists pushups, squats, lunges, dips, kettlebell swings etc. It would also be wise to go on a walk for 20-45 minutes a day as well, this allows the mind to clear and the body to relax - ideally in nature (will help with spiritual and mental clarity as well). Results won't show up right away, but it is the constant effort that is being applied everyday that will add up to something more. Sitting up straight and having your shoulders back is also good, build up the confidence anyway you can, maybe do a power pose.

- Spiritual:
Meditation, @TheTinkeredMind is a meditation app that is being developed, currently not released but highly recommend it, as the development that is being done is incredible - along with it will help build up the habit of meditating. Now time does not wait for an application to be made, so meditate for 5 minutes, just sit in silence for 5 minutes and observe your breathe or your mind - that is it, start with 5 minutes, if a challenge is required or more time is available do 20 minutes. This will help tremendously in overall wellbeing and just a better understanding of yourself and the world around you

Now that is a great place to start, it is the slow build, other things to include is sleeping 7 to 9 hours a night, drinking water, and writing. Remember to schedule these things, schedule out what is important to you and ensure it happens! Perhaps including some affirmations would be a good idea, that you repeat and visualize (though I am not too big on them, they are found to help). The key for any of these things is to do it daily, and to slowly build it all.

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Large Sums

When we have nothing we try to gain a lot, and gain as much as possible but with that comes this aspect of when is it enough. We continuously seek to gain more, to acquire large sums so that we never have to feel like we have nothing, and thus feel powerless. This response of not wishing to feel powerless is something that is completely reasonable to want to avoid, so we seek more. Typically this seeking more and trying to reach this magical number of being 'safe' leads us to not being happy until we hit those numbers - wouldn't that lead to a sad life of chasing? Let's say we hit that number, we realize we don't feel safe or secure, so what do we do? We add another large sum and then continue this chase to 'freedom', to what end? When will we be happy, safe and secure? These questions bare repeating because so many of us are trying to reach some imaginary goal in order to allow ourselves to feel happy - the issue is that we don't know how to be happy.

We were practicing how to be sad, or focused but we never practiced how to be happy, we never took the time to be enthusiastic about living - how will we know how to be happy? The argument could be made that it is an innate state therefore we will know how to do instantly... Instincts dull over time when they aren't used, it is harder to listen to your gut when it has never been done before; the same thing applies to feeling secure or happy. Though we have degreased from the original question which was when is it enough? The simple answer is, always. It is always enough, we decide when we feel safe and secure, for some of us it in a bunker hidden in the Alaskan forests or perhaps it is living in a box in New York City. It is always enough, the large sums we chase don't matter, if our wants are small.

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The Death Of Creation

The death of creation occurs whenever we over consume media (music/movies/audiobooks/podcasts etc.), it saps our ability to create and to dream beyond what is occurring right now. This ability to create is also hindered when we don't take time to sit with ourselves in silence and just allow our minds to wander and be free. We have so many distractions and we allow ourselves to continuously add more distractions, and our ability to create begins to get destroyed. The constant consumption of media doesn't allow ourselves to create media. Now media can be extremely helpful in gaining new ideas and helping us connect new ways of thinking together, but at some point we must put in the time to do the connecting and the extrapolating which is where most of us falter. We go to work, and then we go home and start up netflix after a few hours you go to sleep, rinse and repeat - what kind of life just involves consuming all the time? The ability to create is one of our most powerful traits, as humanbeings, yet we are choosing to pass that by in order to distract ourselves from some pain? What does that say about us?

We are slowly dying, our ability to create is being diminished the more things we consume, but the thing about creation is that it can be rebooted at any time. It doesn't matter how old you are, what your skin color is, or what religion you are, the ability to create can never be killed only put into hibernation. The statement that arises in most our minds is "I don't know what to create." but the thing is, is that we can make whatever we want. This could be a sharp stick, or it could be a beautiful drawing or an ugly piece of shit of a drawing, it doesn't matter. What matters is that you are creating at least one thing everyday, one thing that can be pointed at. Do not be put to sleep. Create.

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Lucky Ducky

We attribute luck to things when we feel something was unfair or to something we may of deserved because to acknowledge that something happened because of our actions is foolish. Once we attribute ourselves to what has occurred then we are at fault, now the kicker isn't that we are at fault but that things aren't about blaming others. We use good luck and bad luck as labels for things that happen around us that were unexpected, thus creating a narrative that doesn't exist - placing new layers of perspective onto situations.

There is an old chinese story about a farmer and his son, their neighbors say 'that's such good luck' or 'that's such bad luck', the farmer simply says good luck or bad luck whose to say. This story is about how our circumstances change and thus what we viewed as bad luck, may have actually been 'good' luck, and once we label something we have defined it and placed it into a box. Now the chances of a new opportunity or a new perspective popping off of that is gone. We kill our chances of truly figuring things out, even being on our death beds, we will not know what was good or bad luck in terms of the universe, we will simply know what it was for us.

We like the word lucky, because it's a scape goat, sometimes things happen randomly (most times) but they are only appearing to us as random because we lack all the perspectives that exist in the universe. Most of us have a few different perspectives we can activate, some of us have a few dozen, but none of us have all of them; this is what begins to matter when we define things as lucky, we simply don't have the entire dataset so we define it as lucky.

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We are told to grow-up and become adults but at what point is being an adult overrated? We seek to forget being a child because we know how people treat children and how they are looked down at, so we rush away from being childlike, for example being a goofball or playful with our actions. Running into the world with adulting on your face, stern, serious, get shit done, yet for what? What is the point of the seriousness that is held onto? Most things in the world require 0 seriousness, most things need a bit of playfulness in order for them to be enjoyed - so at what point is being a goofball, or childlike (in the sense of the act of playing) a bad thing? There is the issue of being looked at as lesser by those whom have never seen the side that needed to be serious, but is that really an issue? This question becomes important because it makes us think beyond them thinking lesser of us, and more about why they matter at all - we should be playful when we believe it is right or useful.

The second we begin to play we give others permission to be silly and be playful as well, and to unlock their inner child. This amplifies the joy and happiness that exists in the world, because it is giving permission to everyone who notices it, to be childlike and to simply play with the things around them, with their words and their actions - it pulls away from the stress of being an 'adult', it gives one some freedom in a world where we feel like we have none.

Perhaps it isn't being playful that is looked down at, but the lack of responsibility that is not being shown. If we are responsible it is less childlike, but we can maintain the playfulness, which is essential for a healthy life. Being willing to be responsible gives us the freedom to be playful and to enjoy things to a much greater extent than merrily being playful - a balance must be struck to a certain degree, or simply the ability to hold responsibility.

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The biggest thing that slows the growth of people is the belief that they can not change, or that the people around them won't allow them to change or grow. We are anchored to the past because when people to recall who we are, they are recalling past experiences of us and thus recalling a false version of us as they aren't recalling the current version of us. This is more prevalent with those that we have known for a long time, the longer we have known someone the more likely they are to anchor us to the past, as their memories lie there - now this also applies to us, we also anchor others by not acknowledging their growth or seeing them for who they are now, and not what they were. It is easy to see this problem when we talk to strangers, strangers have no perception of us and thus see us for who we are and not what we were, of course this has it's flaws like all things do. The only thing within our control is to continuously show the change that we have worked towards, and to continuously act accordingly - this allows those who are open to change to see the difference in who we are and not who we were. This involves constant action and doing which then slowly will transform into doing these actions without thinking about them.

Another way we can change and have the people around us be okay with it, is to constantly be changing and evolving and doing things that are a surprise to them. This way of being allows them to never fully create a picture of who you are, thus allowing the shedding of old skins and old patterns of being with ease - this can also be dangerous as it is easy to simply do things to be 'different' and not for any other purpose than that.

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Falling For Potential

It is easy to fall for our imagination, easy to imagine something better or see something that can occur but it is much harder to see what is truly occurring. This is especially important when it comes to relationships and work, we think about how much potential someone has or how much potential a position in a company has, so we stick through all the pain and suffering because we believe in the potential. It is a great thing to be an optimist, life is more fun, but it is not fun to trick yourself or to allow your delusions of potential to blind you from what is occurring. This means that if things aren't actively or passively getting better ie work is getting less shitty, your partner is actually working towards that potential, then all that is happening is dreaming and suffering - so perhaps better described as a nightmare. The idea of potential is nice and comforting because it isn't real, it doesn't exist in the moment but it exists in the 'future' - who knows which one. The future is something that is fluffy and can be imagined to be anything, therefore it is even easier to fool ourselves about the future; this isn't something we like to admit to ourselves though, we hate acknowledging that fact - that the future is fluffy and that it may simply be an illusion to make ourselves feel better about bad circumstances.

The key here is that we must be aware of what is occurring in the present, if their is effort being applied to reaching the potential and some results (even if they are small), then to continue to believe in the potential isn't a bad thing, it can be something beautiful. The issue exists when we fail to acknowledge that no effort and results are occurring in the present, and everything is being placed on this wishy washy future that doesn't exist.

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Cost Of Failure

When we decide to do something or think about doing something do we think about what the cost of failing would be and then weigh it out with the cost of success? When we think of successeding at something, it typically has a very high upside but the cost of failure is typically just time and energy. The first thing we must be aware of is that we waste time everyday, and most of us carry enough energy (fat) around in us to use it up, this is all to say that we have time to waste and energy to spare for a project that may fail. When we take that into account with the fact that the upside is nearly infinite then what excuse do we have for not doing the project? This comes down to thinking about failure as being limited, there is only so much you can lose (unless you short stocks) but if if their is success the gains are infinite - with this thought process most of the ideas we have and projects we wish to do are great things to use our excess time on - this isn't to say the idea/project is an actual good idea, but it definitely isn't a waste. When we reach for this idea/project it is most likely out of our comfort zone and so we are growing by trying to achieve it and work on - we will be learning! How can learning be a waste of time, even if we hit a dead end we still learn something (yes, this can be said for almost everything - everything is a lesson).

Let's say we skip the idea or project, what is the cost of regret? The cost of regret is infinite, and more so the probability of having regret is extremely high. Our perspective on how we approach things we want to try and do is essential because it changes our motivations to evolve and grow - what perspective will you take the next time YOU have an idea or project?

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Fragile Bonds

Trust is extremely fragile, it can be forged in stressful situations or by telling something that leaves another vulnerable but in all cases it is fragile. Once trust is being extended and crafted most of us look for signs to stop building up the trust and simply walk away (here is where it gets tricky). We are searching and waiting for the other person to disregard a boundary or an excuse not to continue trusting another, and this searching and waiting is a defense mechanism but it also a self-stabbing machine. When we sit and look for another to fail or stumble we are are not allowing them to make any mistakes nor allowing them to grow, this is setting them up to not get better or even improve - how can trust be built under these conditions? We start stopping the forge from building up this bond of trust and thus not allowing it to solidify where mistakes are allowed and growth is welcomed.

Here is the fatal flaw that a lot of people who have been hurt in the past fall for they will allow the trust to be built but they had built it out of glass because the belief that if this persons messes up once it means they are a bad person and can't be trusted, but they simply slipped up so of course the glass is broken. This is a dangerous habit to enter as we begin to believe everyone is bad and out to get us when really we are out to get ourselves. True trust is forged out of iron (Steel is better, but it's main component is iron so...), it can be broken like all things but it is not fragile; it takes a large betrayal and constant hacking away at it to be destroyed, consider rust, once iron has rusted enough it can not be repaired or redeemed, a small patch of rust can be taken care of, but must be done quickly; this applies to breaking someones trust, it must be talked about and repaired - the real matter is deep within us, we must truly understand and forgive another for them breaking the trust and that is the only way it can be rebuilt.

Note: At some point the words began to blur, the sentences melded together and thus this piece stops here, it doesn't feel complete but that is important - the building of trust is never complete, it can always be broken; this is where loyalty comes into play.

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The Lows

It is easy to be happy when on top of the world, it is easy to believe that the world is good and everything is peachy when on top of the world, but what about being at rock bottom? Are we still peachy, believing the world is good or are we raging agains the world, hating it for putting us in such a bad position? These are the questions one must ask themselves, because the bottom exists and sometimes we need to visit it and how we act when things aren't going our way makes us who we are. This is where the value of someone is truly determined, are they still happy go lucky or are they angry and annoyed at the world for screwing them over - as if the world cares what happens good or bad, it simply just does. The person we are is shown when we are at rock bottom, we can not hide behind the fake facade of how the world is love, and how everything is beautiful, now if we truly believe that when we are the bottom then HOT DAMN, that is a beautiful thing because when we are at the top we will still have that perspective.

It is very easy to fall into the hate and into the negativity, it is much harder to float a boat on positivity, but they glide so much better on positivity. We must truly try our best to keep our positive outlook when things are looking bleak and work towards making those things better because we are not at the mercy of our circumstances. The second we only allow ourselves to enjoy and be happy when things are high, we have doomed ourselves because when we are low, we can only be allowed to feel 'low' or negative emotions. Life is a fluctuating sinusoidal function, going up then going down then going up.

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Directing Rivers

When we feel intense emotions, like anger, it is how we direct those emotions that lead them to be good or bad. WHen we feel anger or frustration, do we direct those emotions into productive manners ie figuring out the problem with more energy, do we have the urge to improve and better ourselves, or do we just let those emotions fester and lash out towards others? Anger and frustration are powerful tools that can be used to as fuel for pursuing dreams or burning the dead wood within, but most of use those emotions to simply destroy ourselves and go into self-destructive behaviour. Emotions aren't good or bad but they are simply rivers that must be redirected and directed to help us this involves a lot of work, a great post on this idea was written by Tinkered Thinking called "Natural Spring". The goal is to direct the emotions to be helpful and not harmful to you, and this is a constant effort type of problem - we must constantly work on building these healthy rivers for the emotions to flow through and not allow them to spill everywhere.

We have this habit of labeling emotions as good and bad when we should really be looking at how we use those emotions and utilize them for our benefit. Emotions can be easily triggered and they can easily be falsified so when we place our entire existence on them we fall prey to the contentions that society has placed on them, which implies that anger, frustration and sadness are negative and happiness and joy are positive - this can easily be destroyed by thinking of a time where you were smiling so much that your face began to hurt; that was a positive emotion yet it caused you pain? The goal is to direct emotions to help you, their is no such thing as positive or negative only perceptions and rivers.

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The Relationship Conundrum

The question that arises at times is the one "Am I worthy" or "will there be others in my life in the future", these can be two different questions but for now let's assume they are one question centered around if past relationships (friendships, family relations, dating relationships) or lack there of dictate the future. This may indicate that one would be doomed to be alone forever because something is inherently wrong with them and thus there is the lack of healthy relationships. We can also take this in another direction perhaps the relationships of the past were simply those that were not the right fit, thus the fault does not lie within us but within the relationship. Both of these directions lead us down different but what good is a path if we don't know if it is the right one? If the path is important the next question that arises is which path is the right path, or a better question could be why does the past matter and why do these paths matter?

If we write off the past and all the failed relationships and begin ourselves as a new humanbeing, how would we build ourselves? That!!! That is it, it gets rid of all the past baggage and gets rid of all the assumptions. The issue with all those questions is that we must make a ton of assumptions about each aspect of the past and each relationship that has ever occurred; we can not read the other persons heart nor their mind, and asking them will lead to biased results, thus the questions become meaningless to an extent. The questions lead us down various routes of thought, allowing us to explore areas we haven't touched before that may lead to new realizations. So let us take this giant leap and assume everything in the past is irrelevant in terms of truth, and that all is fiction made up of the current perspective and twisted by old perspectives - so really none of it is actually true to any degree. When we make this assumption it comes with a risk, we are not blank canvases, we have patterns and old habits that have enough energy to keep us going in a bad direction or in the right direction, that is important to note. It is easier to create a new thing based upon a blank canvas than to fix a broken or messy canvas that is the humanbeing.

If we take ourselves from this moment forward how would we repair our habits and our patterns to be better, to be more helpful in future and current relationships - notice this won't hinder our relationships now, or hinder us because we are not dragging the assumption that we are the problem or that their is a problem with the current relationships. This is important because we may create strain in our relationships now if we make the assumption that they are flawed or that we are the problem; best to silently work on them (and sometimes that means being vocal about things we weren't vocal about before). The first thing we need to do is write down what we would want ideally in every current relationship, and then look to see if YOU are doing your part for this to work, if you are not, then what parts are missing? Figure out all the missing parts in each relationship (a spreadsheet would be wonderful here), then figure out which missing parts affect all the current relationship that YOU are missing. Then pick one of those, and work on it - simple as that (if only hahaha). Taking these steps should improve your relationships with others and improve your life - the real issue is being cold hearted when looking at yourself, and ripping out as much bias as you can.

That is the essence of improvement.

Note: There is nothing wrong with being alone, this is simply something I wanted to write about because I find the topic fascinating and was struggling to wrap my mind around it.

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A Thousand Cuts

We have so many distractions hitting us in every moment, all trying to drag our attention away from what we are trying to do, it a death by a thousand cuts. When we decide to focus or work on a task we should put our full effort into that task. This means we should limit as many distractions as possible, yes 1 cut isn't so bad, but as the cuts start adding up we will destroy ourselves - that is the cost of allowing distractions to roam free. Distractions widdle away our attention, limiting the effectiveness of our effort, we be applying 80% effort but only 10% of it is actually being applied to the task at hand, the other 70% is being syphoned by distractions that are in the background, and even the distractions in the foreground - like the phone that can be seen in the corner of your eye. If we can stop 1 distraction from occurring ie moving the phone out of site, then we may get back a percentage of effort which can then be used towards making progress against the task at hand. Now the issue that can arise is our deep focus into getting rid of all the distractions leads us to never doing any work because all of ouir effort is being applied to the getting rid of more distractions - now getting rid of distractions becomes a distraction. We don't need to remove all of them, but simply remove the easy ones, phones, tablets, extra tabs open in the browser, doing this allows fewer cuts to occur, and thus you can have else effort be syphoned. The goal should be to limit the syphoning of effort, not eliminate it completely, because at some point the energy put into eliminating distractions is too costly for the amount of elimination that is occurring.

Do not die by a thousand cuts, that is a slow and painful way to die - it is like you have been working on a 15 minute task for 3 hours, now the task took forever and no part of it was enjoyable, better off taking 2 hours to be fully distracted than half assing the entire task.

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Passive Consumption

Passively consuming information feels so wonderful and productive, but that is all it does - feels productive. Passively consuming is reading without thinking about what is being read, scrolling through twitter, watching "educational" videos, this is all passive consumption, nothing becomes solidified nor is it ever revisited. When we passively consume we have the belief that because we are consuming we will end up with substantial results. Why would we end up with meaningful results when we put in unmeaningful effort - this is effort that involves watching a video(or reading, scrolling through twitter etc.) while texting a friend and perhaps having music playing or a tv show. The reason we continue to do it and continue to believe it is helpful is because we enjoy it and then justify why it is actually meaningful and how much we have learned, but we know it is a lie. The easy way to tell what is true is when we hate reading a thing, not because it is badly written or wrong, it is because it is right and it goes against what we believe - using negative emotions as a guide to what to do is extremely wise, have a business idea that is totally out of your realm and terrifying; it is probably a good idea to do it.

Active consumption involves full attention and then thinking about the topic at hand, it's implications, and seeing where the mind leans - this involves effort, and is something that must of us are not used to doing. Actively consuming information allows us to connect different ideas and solidify ideas. Now some ideas are difficult to understand, and that is where revisiting them becomes essential, actively reconsuming the same information at different points in time allow for new connections between old thoughts and new thoughts to occur - that is the growth that has occurred between the two consumptions.

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Death Of Tradition

We question tradition and then we state "innovation is the way forward" yet we don't start with the question why is this tradition here - why does it exist. That question is vastly more important than innovation for the sake of innovation. The thought process that innovation is always an improvement leads us down a path built by illusions because we never checked why the previous version existed. Of course it may have only existed because of limitations of technology or a lack of creativity; perhaps it was none of those and it was because it protected the human spirit or something. The purpose of the question of 'why does this tradition exist' is to examine the self that wants to destroy it, when we ask that question we seek to find the reason it has remained not the reason it should go - that in itself is vitally important. When we are asking why it should go, the list can be infinite but when we ask why it should remain we can see what the consequences of removing the tradition would lead to.

Here is a prime example, in California (United States) and even British Columbia (Canada) there are massive forest fires during the summer due to the forest floor being perfect tinder and lightning strikes frequent and stupidity of people even more frequent, now people are mentioning doing controlled burns to stop massive forest fires from occurring but this idea of controlled burns was common place within native tribes of California. The natives would do controlled burns to allow the forest to regrow and bring life back into it, but that practice was stopped when the settlers came in and displaced them (also killed them, like a lot of them). Their was a tradition upheld by people who knew the land and then destroyed because of 'innovation', now that tradition is trying to be done again because of the consequences of destroying it have gotten too massive - who in history forgot to ask the question "Why does this tradition exist"? This is only one example, this occurs all the time; we destroy things of the past in order to bring upon a new era all with the ideology of "innovation is the way forward".

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Secret Sauce

We search the world for the secret sauce, that little thing that will make the sauce incredible, make our life vastly better - but garlic isn't a secret, or perhaps it needs a bit more salt, that isn't a secret either. The secrets of a good sauce are freely given, all you need to do is practice and play around with different styles, perfecting things one at a time. We spend our time searching for the secret in our life, but it doesn't exist, all that exists is effort and learning from mistakes, it's the same thing when making a sauce. Now you may be given a recipe for a 'secret' sauce, but that isn't a secret, we cna google a recipe then make it our own - all for free! The difference between a success and a failure is how many iterations one has gone through, the more iterations that are gone through the better the final result - if we take the time to learn from the mistakes, questioning what happened, where things could have gone wrong. Isn't it simple? Nothing about this 'secret' is difficult nor is anything a secret, but we hope to find a secret.

We hope to find a secret because then we don't have to deal with failures, the multiple iterations required in order to make the perfect sauce, the trick that we all want to deny is that it requires time and effort. The seek for the secret leads us to jump from thing to thing in order to save time, and that idea of saving time leads more time than actually just going through the iterations - moving slow, pausing, breathing that will lead you further and sustain your ability to keep learning and your enthusiasm way past the initial excitement. That is the difference between successful people and unsuccessful people (now to preface, I am neither successful nor unsuccessful), they are willing to take their time and execute over the long term and not worried about the short term. We could have made a sauce that wasn't bad and able to feed our loved ones, whereas if we keep searching for the perfect recipe we won't be able to put anything on the table for those we love.

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We praise famous people for their existence and believe they are godlike, and then we believe god(s) to be indestructible, because how can something so great or powerful be destroyed? Once a god bleeds or a famous person bleeds we realize they can be killed, that they aren't that great and perhaps they deserve to be cancelled. We want there to be a way to never die, to live forever, but that is impossible with the perspective we have. Consider an idea brought into this world by a person, a humanbeing, and how that idea lives on for centuries and sometimes even thousands of years, the person who created the idea is long gone, but their work lives on. That is the manner in which we can achieve immortality, consider Guy Fawkes still remembered 400 years later. We focus on being remembered as something magnificent instead of letting our ideas take flight and improve the world - we immortalize ourselves by trying to help the world and the manner in which it thinks.

Note: I had so many thoughts on this, but they fell away as I wrote this post, thus it ended up shorter than I would have preferred. Just watch V For Vendetta.

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A Life Without Darkness

The hardest part of being alive is to incorporate the darkness within you with the light that wants to shine alone - that is our greatest struggle. The problem arises when the darkness within us is denied, we try to love and allow the light within us to grow but run away from the dark parts of us, so we aren't living a full life, only a partial one. This is a huge issue because we try to only live for the highs but not for the lows in life. Life is all about the lows, the ebs and the flows, it includes the highs with the lows that is the only thing that keeps life worth living. Now consider the darkness within us, when we deny it how can we appreciate life? We are simply running away from one aspect and hoping another aspect within us can fill that void - this brings up the thought: perhaps a part of us feels empty and void because we deny the darkness within us (wouldn't that be hilarious? All we had to do was work on incorporating both parts of us and perhaps we could be fulfilled). The issue isn't that we have darkness within us, the issue is that we deny that it exists, we crawl away from it towards the light thinking that will save us. We may only be saved by embracing both sides of us, the happiness and the rage.

The idea accepting anger as something that needs to occur is logical but seems radical, we were always told not to allow the darkness within us to appear or to look at the darkside of humanity (and ourselves), but that may just be what we are missing. We have become afraid of ourselves, of facing the evil that we have the ability to do and the dark thoughts that linger within us, so how can we ever feel whole? At what point will we turn back to ourselves and accept the darkness as being part of us? This doesn't mean go out and destroy the world, or ruin a persons day because you are feeling anger, it simply means that this 'bad' part exists within us and there is nothing wrong with that.

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Fear Of Success

When we succeed in something it opens up a bunch of possibilities, an entire world that didn't exist before we attempted to do it and now we have to face this whole new world full of unknowns, so what do we do? We run away, we hide behind things in our life in order to not have to try or not have to be successful, this also plays on the idea of Resistance. Resistance has been built around this thing that we want to be successful at, and that holds back our progress even more, we now create more excuses not to do the thing we want to do - we begin to be the mouse and the cat; creating our own fears and then running away from them. We can never be fulfilled like that, it's a constant running and trying to escape from the possibilities that lay ahead. The question of what can we do to stop this and to proceed onwards towards success... Here is where the hardships lie, and also how simple it really is, it is simply done. The way to overcome the fear is to do the act, again and again and again, forever; yet we fear that, it seems to simple yet impossibly hard.

That is the thing, we are scared so the simple act of walking becomes difficult and that is all we really have to do, we don't even need to think about walking, we just do it - That is what needs to be done. This is easy to chat about or write about, but extremely difficult to do in reality, but the only way is to do, and to build up your inner strength by doing. This isn't an answer that sits comfortably within us (even as I write this, I hate that it is the conclusion that has arisen - hahah hate), we don't like simple truths especially when we have to take action once we hear them (on that note, this post is done - I have to take action on certain things.)

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Scheduled Time

The idea of not having enough time in the day is not a false claim but it is a perspective issue. We have enough time to do everything we need to do, but not everything we 'want' to do - we want to work out, meditate, read, maybe do some yoga or work on our side business, but do we really want it? Or do we like the idea of wanting to do it? This is where perspective becomes important, if we need to do something we will have it scheduled in the day, ie work, meetings etc. Most of us don't schedule time to do what we 'want' to do, but we will gladly allow time to slip away from our hands like the sands of the sahara. Time does not care how it is used and it'll keep on ticking and the thing with the human mind is that it seeks to do the most pleasurable things now, not things that will be pleasurable in the future, thus the things we 'want' to do simply continue to slip out of our grasp. The things we 'want' take time and effort over an extended period of time, it is not instant gratification, thus it will never be done until it becomes need to do, or it enters scheduled time.

Once something is scheduled our mind feels an obligation to see it through, as the calendar is for events that must occur, not events that may have to occur, that is what a task list is for - a task list: a list that never ends or gets completed but feels like productivity in action (hahaha yes, I'm calling out task lists). A task list gives the perception of 'need' to do but it lacks scheduled time and we have not set them up to be done, they simply get longer.

If we take the things we 'want' such as working out, or writing and schedule that time in our day it becomes tangible, it doesn't get lost in time or on a list. This is the difference between life changing habits and simply wasting away, most of us want to change, or like to believe we are willing to change, but we never do until the world forces us to change by shaking things up. Change occurs over time and is rarely drastic when we allow ourselves to change and alter our life; if we begin to the schedule the things that are important to us, they will have a higher rate of retention and stickiness. (woah, three paragraphs what a wild concept hahahhaaha, gotta have some fun breaking the 4th wall)

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Forceful Solutions

Some people have designed and built themselves to be solution oriented, always looking on how to fix things and improve things for themselves, and for those around them which is great until it becomes a clutch. When we begin to focus on solving all our problems it leads us to living a better life, but it also pulls us out of the moment, it stops us from enjoying life as we end up always chasing the next solution - it gets worse when we start solving problems for our friends or people who are closest to us, because it strips the chance of them solving it for themselves away from them. As we continue to solve their problems or search out solutions we are also pulling them out of the moment and their life; if they bring up this problem but aren't complaining about it, why should we search to change it? This can become a point of friction in any relationship, making them feel stiffed and smothered, and this solution based approach to everything is selfish. Our intentions are good by trying to solve problems but that the problem we fail to solve is the problem of us solving every problem that occurs wether our own or someone elses. So when should we help another?

It seems simple that we should always try to help those around us, but most people want the opportunity to help themselves. This leads to a funny resolution that in order to help them, we must allow them to help themselves which implies a very hands off approach from us - does this mean we can't help them if they ask? No, when someone asks for your help and it is within your power to help them, then help them - it simply means don't take control, don't solve their problem but assist them in the exploration of it. This stops us from being forceful with our solutions which as mentioned is selfish and smothering, and instead be a guiding force which is free flowing and assistive.

Note: This topic was thought about a long time ago, when someone brought this up to me as being a problem with me and it didn't click until I wrote this piece and when chatting about this with some friends. I urge all of you to write and to explore yourselves, things don't make sense right away but that is why we explore. It may feel goofy, but it is helpful, explore the ideas inside and see how they express themselves. If you are unsure about how to start here are a bunch of posts by Tinkered Thinking: (too many to list, so click here)

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Shaped Experience

Often we end up complaining about all the negativity in our life, or the negativity on twitter(or whatever social media is your favorite) that we forget that we curiate everything in our life. We decide who is in it, we decide what we see, don't like something? Block it, unfollow move on. We can completely control our online experience, hating a platform, simply leave, now the mind will play its tricks trying to get us to stay on the drug that is killing us, but we must make the healthy decision for ourselves. In our day to day interactions and experience we may be witnessing a ton of negativity or push back from the world and that can be very difficult to deal with, yet the first question we should ask is, is our mind on our side or not? This question is meant to question the perspective and the outlook we have towards people and the world, are we positive when things look bad, or are we negative, do we judge people as they walk by or do we simply live our life? These outlooks and ways of interaction shape our entire experience, by altering the way we interact with things we change the things themselves, perhaps not inherently but in the reality we experience things will be better.

It is not easy to change our mentality or the way we interact with ourselves, and even the world so we must treat ourselves as if we were babies. We need to trick ourselves into experiencing a better side of the world and that involves patience and continuous effort. This involves a ton of awareness, when something bad happens be aware of the emotions that are being experienced but do not associate them with, and look for other emotions that lay within that experience, wether positive or negative. It's an altering of the perspective that we have that leads to a different life being led even if nothing else changes, your entire universe will shift as your perspective does. So shape your experience of the world or it'll shape you.

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State Of Confusion

We want learning to be quick and simple, just absorbing information like a computer and utilizing that information just the same, but learning is anything other than quick and simple. Learning is a constant pattern of confusion and understanding. It is a very frustrating endeavor as it involves a constant need to readjust the mind and our perspective as we a firmer grip on the knowledge we seek everything changes. Most of us don't like change, and we definitely don't like being confused but that is a key indicter that learning is possible; when confused we know there is something that can be learned so it is a matter of being curious and navigating confusion/frustration to lead to the results we seek, yet why are we afraid of being confused?

When we are confused we are more prone to making mistakes and getting upset with ourselves. This combination of mistakes (multiple failures) and getting upset leads to us either not starting or simply quitting when things start to get rough and the frustration of not understanding soars higher than we expected. We have to start without expecting to understand it and to realize that if we don't start we are just wasting time, and that if we make mistakes and have to restart we are actually wasting less time than we would had we not started - that right there is vital, when we decide not to start what we are doing is wasting time and then being frustrated at not starting a day later, whereas when we do start (not simply deciding to start, but actually starting) we may get frustrated in the first 5 minutes, but we don't feel upset with ourselves the next day, unless of course we quit within 10 minutes of starting. Now what to do with frustration when in a state of learning (or confusion; really they should be synonoms), Tinkered Thinking has a marvelous post on that, which is called Funneling Frustration - give that a read and ride into confusion, become comfortable with it.

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Pushed Off The Edge

When people get laid off their first instinct is to get another job and to begin making money again, but what if that is the chance and the kick they needed in order to chase their dreams? We view getting fired or laid off as a terrible thing, and yes it isn't good but it provides the best opportunity to do whatever the heart desires. Perhaps we wanted to work for ourselves and sell pottery or perhaps we wanted to code video games but have no previous experience, now we can head in any direction we want. We can spend time learning to code, or starting up our business instead of chasing another job that we don't really want. This involves a lot of pain and a lot of faith in yourself because it means hedging your bets on you - you'll be the one to take full responsibility for your work, for your life, it can no longer be left to a boss or anyone. Being fired can be the greatest paycheck anyone can give you, it also gives rise to building up a side business incase your main 9 to 5 gets squashed.

Even when we have very little to lose in terms of career options we are resistant to believe in ourselves and put in the hours it takes to achieve a goal/dream we may hold; facing that reality can be difficult and can lead to us heading back to a job that is stable but ultimately unfulfilling. We have been pushed off the edge and we have the choice to freefall into new potential opportunities or we can try to grip onto the cliffside and go back to what we know, to what was comfortable - no one can hate a person for picking what they are comfortable with, but no one can be proud of making that decision either (at least they shouldn't be), this is all said with the cavate that you are unhappy with what you are doing; if you are happy than more power to you. The thing with chasing your dreams is that knowing the direction and the path that must be taken is rare, the thing that is needed is simply to start moving and figure out direction as momentum picks up. Simple, yet extremely terrifying

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Life Worth Living

The question of what makes a life worth living is one that is explored by many and forgotten by many more. When we ask the question about what makes a life worth living we are really asking what is the purpose of our life, with an answer to that question we hope to improve our life and improve our emotional state. Let's ask the question what is the purpose of asking how to create a life worth living, as that is something that is worthwhile. We seek to find meaning in the things we do so we can justify who we are and the things that happen to people all around the world (or more importantly ourselves), this is why religion was loved for so long. Religion brought comfort to our hearts because it told us everything is planned and there is a god(s), but it also confined our thinking and made us question the idea of free will. As we become aware of being confined by religion it lead to it's decline in popularity over the years but in its place we began to experience more anxiety and seek a greater purpose, because we need something to justify all the bad things that happen and to feel safe - it feels safe to know that there is something/someone controlling things from upabove, so when we ask the question what is our purpose or what makes life a worth living, we are trying to gain some control over the world and ourselves. We want to feel safe and not like we are a giant rock drifting through space at an ungodly speed.

It is only natural to find a purpose for ourselves or to be told one because then we can live for that purpose, it fits in a nice little box, but the thing is, is that we may have multiple purposes throughout our life and that is what is beautiful, we are not limited to one thing. We can be painters and mathematicians at the same time or at two completely different points in time because our purpose evolves with our perspective of the world. This means that when that question of "what is my purpose" comes up, the answer is not permanent, it is in a state of flux and thus will rearise as time goes on; being comfortable with the question and the search for meaning becomes vital as we go through the world and grow old. So ask the question a thousand times, then ask it a thousand more, it's simply a guiding light that we enjoy clinging to.

Note: This post really took an odd turn, a thing to note is these are just thoughts to contemplate and to give rise to more productive thoughts.

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Amplified Effort

We dish out effort to everything and everyone believing that effort in equals an equivalent output no matter where that effort was applied, yet it doesn't ever equal the same. We need to find the people and the things that amplify our effort and thus lead to a higher output number instead of putting it in people where the effort applied dwindles the output as it gets destroyed by the other. We should be finding people who are already putting in effort and trying and pushing them further along, our effort or perhaps guidance will allow them to amplify the output that they can create, thus enhancing the world instead of placing effort in things that simply kill it. This is extremely prevelant in people who don't want help, yet we still try to help them as much as we can - do we try to help them out of love, or selfishness?

The idea of being selective with whom time and energy is spent on vastly improves results as the amount of energy and effort that is applied is no longer being stiffled by those that don't want the help - this applies to those that are giving you advice or input, if you asked for help and someone provides you with a direction and applies some effort, you should be willing and doing enough to provide an output, otherwise their help was wasted. The more selectively we apply effort the better the world will be as the ones who use that effort will then be able to apply effort(better known as help(ing)) to other people, thus causing a chain reaction of goodness. Whereas when we apply effort to those that don't want it or those that don't use it we are ending the possible chain reaction of goodness to be nothing, yet the same amount of effort was applied.

This idea of applying effort applies to everything we do, not just helping people, be selective, your energy should be protected.

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Dream Chasing

It is in the pursuit of something that is impossible that we achieve greatness, that we reach the stars. The chasing of a dream allows us to grow in ways we would never be able to had we just been reaching for achievable goals, it is the drive that the purpose provides that allows us to break the bonds that our beliefs create. This is the beauty of children, they believe everything is possible, allowing them to always try and give it their all. They don't have the part of their mind that says "but Jackson #1 said that, that isn't possible and that I shouldn't waste my time" nor do they even consider that being an option - what occurs though as they grow older is they start being told what is possible and what isn't, and this destroys their will to dream and to become greater and we are left with adults who have no idea what it means to chase a dream and to achieve something.

The creation and the chase of a dream is sometimes more important than the actualization of the dream, because as the dumb cliche says, "it's all about the journey, not about the destination". That cliche is actually very true, it is within the chase that we grow as individuals, we try on new hats and simply love living. One key thing that is usually missed when talking about chasing a dream is the fact that we must face the unknown and the uncertainty of the universe and thus face our existence and mortality. The path of a dream is typically unwalked by others, it's something that is discovered by us as we walk, it can't be crafted into a science; it is a beautiful artform.

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Bothering Of the Self

We believe that the world is bothering us and that a particular person is the problem, yet what is the common factor within all problems that are experienced? You. The problem isn't the problem, it is our outlook on the problem that causes us to feel bothered by it, or for something to be the problem - before we apply our perspective and our thoughts onto the problem, it is simply a situation and nothing more. This is all to say that the world doesn't bother us, we bother ourselves by making things into good or bad, by altering what is reality with the lenses of perspective that we hold.

This is really amplified when we look at how many things annoy us, the question isn't about what those things are, but the question is about why do they annoy us? Is it the little tapping of the keyboard while you are trying to study? If so why is that annoying? Is the act of typing annoying, if so why isn't there annoyance when you are typing? The annoyance does not lie inherently in the object, or the action it lies within us, it is not about the thing but what state we are in. Wouldn't this make the question about why is anything considered annoying or not annoying? The answer is quite simple, nothing is and everything is, the duality of being bothered by something arises with the self, within us, so to fix any problem or any annoyance is completely within our power, the only fault lies within us and if we are capable of putting in the effort to fix it.

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Going Against The Tides

Since ancient times we as a society liked to be included in groups, this meant agreeing with the leaders of our groups and going with the flow of whatever was arising because if we went against them we would be left behind or shunned - big no, no for us as people - yet the path to having the best discussions and the greatest growth as a society and as an individual is through disagreement. In modern society we have no problem disagreeing with people on the internet, but we are reluctant to disagree with leaders of our social group in person for fear of being called out, and this fear is a biological instinct yet it is also cowardly. Most of us would much rather follow along blindly than to think for ourselves and for us to disagree with another, because thinking involves energy and disagreeing runs the risk of losing the respect of those around you, but what about self-respect? The idea of following worked wonderfully back when we were in smaller tribes because that was all we knew, but now we can reach people all over the world and create any group we want. Now we can easily disagree with those who are at equal standing with us, but anyone who the group considers 'essential' we typically struggle with disagreeing yet this stops an honest relationship from forming.

We must be willing to go against the tides in order to grow, in order to get stronger, otherwise we lose out on growing and expanding our horizons and understanding of the world. This occurs all the time when we don't speak our truth, when we blindly follow others without ever thinking about those decisions for ourselves. It takes time and effort to get used to thinking for ourselves, to disagreeing, to saying no (gosh think about how many books are written on being able to say no). The key to it all is to practice doing these things, first with those you are comfortable with, then with the leaders of your social groups, and then with anyone - this does not mean to disagree for the sake of disagreeing but to disagree to get to a deeper understanding, to grow as an individual and understand the others view point.

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Yapping Dogs

When we reflect on the words we talk in an entire day how many of those words are meant to aid the world perhaps in laughter, or in thought, and how many of those words are used simply to fill the air with noise? The majority of words spoken are simply spoken for the sake of speaking, now we may say we are speaking to help others, but what we really want is the attention of others to be on us; feeding our egos and our feelings of self-importance. Now this isn't done out of malicion but out of fear. We fear the silence around us in company or by ourselves because then we have to self-reflect and face the things that scare us within us, and how can anyone hate a person for running away from that? The little insecurities we have rise to the surface during silence because there is nothing else for them to do. So as they rise up we start telling the people around us stories to show them "hey I'm important and have done a lot of things", trying to convince yourself that you have value and have lived a life worth living, when in reality all that is happening is a lot of running from the fear of looking within. This yapping that we call talking leads to noise being filled in the air, and begins to dull the world around us, sucking out the peace from within others and pulling them into your dramas - this of course is wonderful if we as the listeners are also attempting to run away from ourselves, now we can get lost in others.

There is a reason why silence is golden and speech is silver, gold doesn't rust nor does it need to be properly taken care of, it simply does it's thing; now silver must be polished and well taken care of and that applies to talking as well. Words should be said for a purpose, and if that purpose is to tell a story, then yippy, but if they are simply spoken for the sake of filling a void, then that silver is severely tarnished. This is why most people talk and talk, yapping like dogs, instead of talking to add things to the world. We aren't considering the purpose of our words, we are simply speaking them to feel like we have a purpose (notice the distinction of the use of the word purpose).

Of course there is the opposite problem where some people feel they have nothing to contribute to the conversation or think their words will not be valued, but that is a different episode entirely.
Are you yapping or talking?

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Creation Builds Creation

The struggle of creating, and being creative is that we try to call upon it when we do not practice it on a daily basis. We are trying to draw upon something we are not consistently working on, so can we call on something that is dwindling as time goes on? Imagine drawing out steel wire, if you have no steel that is heated where can you draw it from? This idea of constantly creating leads to a stream of hot steel that can be drawn out and molded to whatever is needed, it allows for the creativity within to flourish as it's constantly on. It is the consistency of a practice that allows for greatness to shine, a great example of consistency of a creative pursuit is Tinkered Thinking, he has written over 920 posts, writing every single day and then also doing the podcast - now if we were to ask him to write a dozen posts in a single day, it wouldn't be a problem; that isn't because he is magical, it is because of the compounding of creation every single day for over 1000 days (who knows maybe 5,000).

Creation creates creation, it's similar to a flywheel, it is properlling itself forward, all one has to do is show up and put in the work. When these posts are written, they are writing them self. This is what occurs once the compounding effect of showing up everyday add up, creation simply occurs. Now the cavate is the more that is consumed without contemplation, the harder creation becomes, the more drone like one becomes. The act of thinking and contemplating what is being consumed allows for creation to thrive, new connections are being made, and a different manner of living is occurring. This is all to say create daily, contemplate as much as possible and that will fold into creation.

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The idea of what goes around, comes around is helpful to keep people in line, and to make us as people in a society do 'good' actions, yet it can't be helped to question if karma exists. We want to believe the good things we do will come back to us, and we are told that the bad things we do now, will come back at us in the future. We end up doing good things for the sake of having them back to us, and we avoid doing bad things so bad things don't happen to us, yet are these actions purely good?

These actions sound more selfish than anything, so would karma apply? We may be helping others because we want to be helped in the future, or we may avoid playing a mean prank on a person because we don't want that to happen to us, but none of these actions are inherently good, they are done out of necessity. This is the risk we run when we choose to believe in karma, we are doing 'good' actions so we can be rewarded, it is like putting volunteering on your resume - volunteering was done simply to pad the states and allow one to get a job, it wasn't done out of the goodness of your heart. That is the problem with the idea of karma and volunteering, when someone does something nice or good, it should simply done because it is the right thing to do, not because of the potential to have future gains (that should simply be a pleasant surprise). None of that help was done selflessly nor was it done out of the kindness of ones heart, it was done as a means to an end, and that is why we have internships and favors.

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Agreement With Death

Living requires an agreement with death, when we choose to live we have accepted that we are going to die and with that acceptance comes freedom. We become less obsessed about living forever and more obsessed with living in accordance to ourselves, knowing that we are going to die and that death is a part of living. We must agree to death before we can fully accept life, which is to say we are accepting that life is changing from moment to moment and that we can not control things.

This acceptance of death ends up allowing us to live for ourselves and to do as much as we can well we are still alive because the god of death walks beside us; if we fail to live as best as we can, we are mocking everyone who came before us, and mocking the god of death. This leads for most people to feel inadequate and unworthy of living. We stop worrying about the little things that go wrong in life, and begin to worry about what kind of impact we are having on the world. It is no longer about a single red light, a rude comment made by a stranger, but about what is being contributed to the world and to those around you. This difference in mental framework, is what allows for true freedom in living, realizing that most actions and consequences are inconsequential, whereas others may be vitally important - to pick wisely on what we choose to give a fuck about, and what is just gibberish we feel we need in order to have drama in our lives.

It is with the acceptance of death, that we reprioritize what is important to us and who we want to be - without death, we wander aimlessly - a boat lost at sea.

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Campfire Silence

Most of us live in big cities, rushing from one meeting to the next never taking a moment to pause and breathe, believing that pushing ahead is the only option. This seeking of trying to fit more into a day and forgoing taking care of yourself leads to negative outcomes of wellness and productivity. Some of us may seek the wilderness and a nice campfire to go to annually whilst playing music or checking your phone, thinking that being in a forest is disconnected when in reality the connection to all the of the world is never went away, it was barely even placed on the back burner. This gives us a fall sense of recharging and being free, when what we really need is a simple campfire within a forest or perhaps even in the backyard, no phones, no music, just the roar of the fire.

This method of disconnecting instills a sense of peace within that very few things can do, moving away from the world of noise and distractions to simply breathing and watching the flames flicker; a point of self reflection occurs, and nothing else matters. This nothing else matters mentality is essential as it is the only way to achieve a sense of freedom and peace, it strips away all the distractions of a phone, the distractions of other people, to allow you to be completely present and tend to the moment at hand. This is the power of a campfire, the power of silence - it is a reset to your system, something that shouldn't be done annually, but monthly. The world is constantly trying to draw our attention away from us (this post is also drawing your attention away from us), that is the purpose of it, and society has made it infinitely easier to be distracted by giving us a go-go gadget in our pockets, or purses.

The reason we seek nature is to escape the go-go gadget, and the distractions all around us, it is to reconnect with ourselves and the world on a deeper level than "what's up". Take the time to leave the phone, take time for the you that never gets the attention and care it deserves.

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Imagined Future

We sometimes feel trapped by our current circumstances and feel trapped by who we are right now, we then begin to daydream about the future us, or improbable things in order to feel a sense of escape, a sense of freedom, but we forget about a version of us that didn't get so distracted by all the things society throws at us. We forgot about the past version of us, the child version of us, the one who imagine there adult future as something magical, something where one could explore everything, buy themselves chocolate ice cream at 9 in the morning, and do anything! What happened to that future? When did we forgo our childhood future for ourselves and choose to live in an environment that doesn't make us happy? This isn't to say that we should not suffer to enjoy our future, but it is to say is why aren't we making that child within us proud, and excited to be an adult? We end up making that child within us scared of being an adult, scared of the future and worried about being alive.

This habit of putting things off and waiting for a change in luck is common, but incredibly foolish as it leaves everything to remain stale and to slowly die off. The world and everything in it is always changing, always going through mico-evolutions in order to survive and more importantly thrive in the environment the organism is in; when we as humanbeings refuse to push ourselves to expand and grow, we are reducing ourselves to nothing, along with letting down the child within us, we let down our future self. This is the method in which most of us live, we don't care to be proud of ourselves, or to live a healthy life, most of us just want to be comfortable, comfortable in our pain, or comfortable in our suffering, letting go of the dreams we had as children.

We should all strive to be the version of us that we imagined we would be as children. That version would be better than the current version of us, the one that gave up.

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The Cost Of Existence

We go through life without altering the patterns in which we live, most of us go through the same routine every single day without fail, but every year we complain about where our life is at and where we wish it was. We continue through life like this, doing the same thing as yesterday and being 'too tired' until we get to a point (hopefully) where something hits us and we realize time will pass no matter what we do, time will pass no matter what - it isn't good or bad, it just ticks away. This brings upon the realization that time isn't the enemy, it us who are our own enemy. This realization can lead us to change our patterns and the manner in which we live, because now it isn't fighting against not having enough time, but fighting against how we are using that time. We may change our schedules and change the manner in which we live to accommodate time. We would be spending time doing the things that will lead us to the life we want, and who we want to become. The thing with changing your life and who you are, or simply going in the direction of which life is headed is that consistency is key, without that there is movement forward, but then there is a pull back. This pull back decreases progress made, so when you are doing things on a daily basis you are decreasing the amount of pull back, and vastly increasing the movement forward.

Life stops becoming a struggle when looking back on the past year because it is known that the time and effort was put in every single day to improve at this one thing, so even if you didn't hit the goal it doesn't matter, because you have gotten closer to it - this is the beauty of consistent effort. Now of course you may have not done what was needed to achieve a goal, or to improve your life, so 365 days have passed, perhaps 366 days, and nothing has changed, the complaining occurs, the annoyance at life persists. So what can be done? How many excuses will be told before things start turning around?

A vessel of magnitude does not turn around in a flash, it takes time and effort. Time. And. Effort.

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Spend The Extra 50

When we look to buy things most of us look for the cheapest and most affordable option, yet we know it'll break and become unusable within a year. This obsession with saving money or spending the least amount of money possible leads us to get inferior equipment and tools that could improve our life. We don't think about what an extra $50 can do for our wellbeing, we only think about how we are saving $50. When buying a tent for camping there is a $150 tent which is waterproof and will protect you from the rain as well as the wind, or there is the $100 tent which isn't waterproof; now you are 90% sure it isn't going to rain when the trip is planned, but what if it does rain? What if your trip was for 3 days, and it rained the first night, ruining everything inside and leaving you wet for the rest of the trip, would you have wished to have gotten the more expensive tent? This may seem like a silly example but it can be applied to anything, most people skimp out on their mattress and their pillow, thus leading to a poor quality sleep, and back problems, yet if they spent an extra $50-100 they could be getting the best sleep possible.

It isn't wise to always spend the extra amount of money on things, sometimes the dollar store version or the base version of something is perfectly fine, but when it comes to your wellness and health, there shouldn't be a fear to spend an extra $50 or $100 on allowing you to live a better life. What is money? Simple a tool to be utilized.

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Information Overload

We seek to have more and more information in the hopes that then we can get to a solid conclusion, then we will 'know' the future, yet more information is not always helpful. Many studies have found that at some point more information actually leads to poorer results, it leads to a false sense of thinking that the entire truth has been seen, instead of knowing that only parts of it have been seen - this stops you from fool hardly going into things with the belief of knowing everything, and it also stops one from being willing to take risks. Information is useful and typically more information allows us to make more informed decisions, but that is all they are, simply informed decisions, they aren't the truth, nor are they known. Sometimes more information actually leads us to a state of indecision, or a missed opportunity, because we were too busy gathering information to make the 'best' decision. We get caught up in this vicious cycle of wanting to know more, instead of taking the knowledge we have and making an educated guess, where we are aware of the risk involved and have accepted it.

One of the most important parts is knowing that risk exists and accepting it as a facet of life, instead of trying outwit risk and life by trying to gather more information - there will always be information that is missed, but completely forgotten about. That is the cost of seeking more data, at some point we begin to believe we have gathered all the data; it may simply be better to take the leap into the unknown. The feeling of safety we seek is sometimes only felt once we give up trying to control all the information. Too much of one thing is never wise, and the same applies to information, and none of us are above the allure of wanting to know.

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Flipping Life

To change the direction of life is very simple, it involves writing out the end direction and forming the habits necessary to achieve that end direction, but we make it much more complicated than that. All the vices in our life conspire against us, to slow us down and to stop us from achieving our goals, the resistance we feel is high to changing the direction of our life. This doesn't mean that the actual change is hard, it simply means that we have all these vices that hault us from achieving our goals and our dreams. The constant pull and draw to the things that bring us fast and quick dopamine hits is strong, so we need to be stronger and try to gain those dopamine hits from the habits we want to form, and from the path we want to head down. Simply put, just stop doing the bad stuff, and simply do the good stuff - simple, yet very difficult; this is where we get mixed up, we assume difficult to do means something is complex and we simply don't know what to do, but that isn't what it means. If something is difficult it can still be simple.

This applies to the way we live our life as well, most of us do the same things every single day without every growing as an individual, we wakeup, lay in bed, go to work, come home and watch netflix, and we continue this way for a long period of time, because we think changing our life is complicated, and that we don't know where we want to go... All thes things are excuses not to change, not to try, we built up this resistance so we didn't have to try, but flipping your life is extremely simple, it involves exercise, meditation, reading/learning, and eating well. That alone will do a person wonders, yet no one does all these things, they may dabble in one, and perhaps be heavily invested in another, but the others are lacking. This is all because we don't believe that these habits will compound and improve our life drastically. We as people want instant change bbut that isn't how things work, change takes time, it compounds overtime, if these hbaits were done over a few years you would not recognize the person who you started as, because you have flipped your life.

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The Greatest Threat - A Curious Mind

We had the greatest amount of curiosity as children but as we aged our curiousity about the universe decreased and faded, now we may becoming more curious or we may still be lacking curiousity all together, but the thing is what happened to it? Our curiosity is like a living being, it needs to be constantly fed a string of questions, and possible answers along with perhaps a recursion of the original question based on the possible answers given, but what happened when we began to say we "I know"? The idea of knowing kills curiousity, it stops the recursion from occurring, we no longer need it, we already know the answers we seek - there is no more possible answers, there is only the answer. This idea of knowing increases as we get older and begin going to school, and seeing friends, we begin to need to know everything, to be right instead of to learn, we slowly get rid of curiousity.

When we consider curiousity as being a living being we know that is must constantly be fed a string of questions and possible answers, instead of what google provides, which is a straight forward this is the only way type of answer. Now if we begin to regrow our curiousity about the world we must also begin to realize what killed it in the first place so that it doesn't happen again. It wasn't curiousity that killed the cat, it was boredom. The idea of knowing, and then forgetting everything else is foolish, but it is simple, in it's simplicity it becomes energy efficient not to think and be curious about the world. When we are curious about the world and about ourselves, we are expanding great amounts of energy to think about all the inputs entering our minds, we are taking it all in and processing it consciously instead of unconsciously accepting the first answer. As babies our default was to grow and expand tons of energy into growing but as we got older our nature is to decrease energy expenditure in growth, and increase it in survival, by being curious when we are older we are going against what is instinctual for us, and going with what will serve us the best in the current world we live in.

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Predicting The Future And The Avoidance Of Truth

We as human beings love to predict what is going to happen next, our minds are constantly trying to predict the next thing that is going to occur, and we may question that next thing but only in the hopes of getting a better prediction of the next thing. We forgo the truth of knowing what will happen all for having the ability to be able to guess what will happen next, our love for our own delusions is greater than our love for the truth. We learn about probability, and statistics to more accurately predict the future, but that is just giving our brain more reasons to believe it's own false answers to what the future moment holds. Statistics and probability are wonderful things to utilize but we extrapolate the statistics and probability to fit into our lives. This means our mind warps the numbers to fit circumstances that the numbers weren't designed for, so we are left with false predictions of the future. This is all to avoid the truth, of what is occurring within the moment and to avoid with dealing with the unknown. If we continue to believe our logic is right, and our predictions are accurate then we don't have to look for the truth, we are the truth. We have this positive feedback loop, like a flywheel, constantly feeding itself, heading in the wrong direction, instead of seeking the truth of the situation.

Now the smarter one becomes in the field of 'logic' the easier it is to trick them, because they know more, they are able to predict the future better, but they can't. Their seeking of knowledge their assumptions that they are right lead them to be wrong, because they aren't looking for the truth anymore, they are simply justifying things to suit their narrative.

There is a simple answer for all of this for those who thrive on logic, and even for those who thrive on 'instincts', it is in our nature to find the simplest solution, the fastest way to predict the future, because that means we survive, a tiger chasing us? What is the fastest solution? Fastest prediction of the future? We are wired to solve the future before it happens by taking all the inputs from outside of us and inputting them into us, and coming up with a plausible future. It isn't taking into account the thousand of micro and macro things that occurring around the world or right outside you to form the closest truth of reality, it is simply forming a truth, to move forward and survive.

Note: If this post feels unfinished, in a way this is where the universe stopped spewing words. And that is what you are left with. Make of it what you will, create your own conclusions. Just another thought to contemplate.

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The Appearance Of Beauty

We were told as youths not to judge a book by it's cover, but that is what we all do, we don't pick up a book that has a terrible cover or looks ugly when we quickly flip through the pages. We pick up the book with a beautiful cover, and the book that looks beautiful when we skim through the pages(A really beautiful book was written by a good friend, Tinkered Thinking - Highly Recommend it, check it out here). Now if we do this with books, it means we do this with people as well, we seek to simplify the process of thinking to the bare minimimum, where we can allow our mind to quickly organize things without putting any active energy into it - absolutely wonderful for picking what you want to eat, quite terrible at picking whom you spend your time with, and even worse in the world of instagram. We get swept up by the perception of things, making quick decisions and then building up fast beliefs(see post on beliefs) to justify those quick decisions. Now every action that goes against those beleifs or anything we see that goes against them becomes warped to fit the narrative we have built - this is all based on that quick decision we made earlier. This leads to us not actively looking for warning signs, or actively taking new information to adjust our thoughts on something.

It used to make sense to simply go off of appearances, if someone looked weak, they were probably weak and that would mean dying, if a plant looked off we wouldn't eat it, if meat doesn't look fresh or looks moldy we don't eat it. These are decisions that are made in an instant typically unconsciously, and they serve us perfectly well, but now we live in a world of selfies and artificially made meat. We can see videos of ourselves walking on the empire state building while never having set foot in New York, or a picture at the pyramids, looking perfect without ever going to a single pyramid - the question becomes what is real and what is an illusion? This question involves thinking beyond the initial judgement, it involves questioning what you are seeing to find out the truth of what should be seen. This costs us energy to do, it is why we can easily be swayed by the images we find online, why we would rather follow someone elses thinking than follow our own. We have no skin in the game, yet we fail to realize our entire being is in the game and that the little amount of energy it would take to think, is well worth it.

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Power Of Intentionality

When we are so used to doing 3 things at once, we have our phones in our hands, perhaps an ipad on the desk and a tv show running in the background, yet we are still trying to accomplish a task we have set out for ourselves. We end up completing that 15 minute task in an hour, but it is done, so we feel like we are excellent multitaskers... What could have been done in those 45 minutes that were taken up by a simple task? This is the power of multitasking, and yes it is a power but no it is not super. The true super power is being intentional, being focused on a single task, the task gets completed quickly and it gets completed correctly. That is a super power, though it can be gained by one, yet few ever reach for it intentionally. The idea behind being intentional and focused on a single task is really quite simple, but we are so used to having a thousand different inputs going straight into our brain that we struggle to even focus on what is occurring now, unless our life is immediately in danger.

We seek to get rid of tasks that we have to do, yet prolong them for as long as possible because we don't want to do them, then leading us to multitask well doing the task to what end? Perhaps a better question would be when will we begin to focus on one thing at a time? This is something that is extremely simple to incorporate in ones life. Begin by simply watching netflix and only doing that, or being fully present when with others, ie turning the phone off, it starts off by doing it with easy tasks, if netflix fails to hold your attention, try reading a book you loved as a child or a new book. The goal is to incorporate being intentional in your daily life, which is simple to attempt but hard to do - so increase the amount of attempts done per a day, thus drastically decreasing the time it will take for an entire day to be intentional.

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The Tides Of Greatness

The belief that greatness must always occur is a fool hearty one, greatness is like the sea, always shifting. Today's greatness will not match tomorrows or the past, what we should be striving for is doing the best that we can. It is no longer about producing perfection, or being able to continuously pump out great content, it is about putting the best foot forward everyday. Some days we will feel on top of the world and everything we do will be nailed out of the park, other times we will fail to hit any pitch thrown at us and we will be in a deep slump, but neither of these states is permanent, both are in flux. The key is the best of your abilities being shown for the moment, because that is all that exists, this moment. This takes away the pressure of always producing greatness, and puts something else in it's place. We begin to shift away from perfection, and to something more real and less hateful of the self for having an off day.

Now the counter is that as you grow in a particular field you will get better and thus always produce greatness, now this is a wonderful thought, but it is nothing more. Once improvement starts to occur so does the level at which something is considered great. We may consider being able to draw a perfectly straight line freehandedly as greatness, but then we want to be able to pain the swirls of the wind, now that straight line is just the default, it's simple. We alter the meaning of what is great by reaching that point, then moving it, shifting it to something even higher. This will be a continuous process, and there is nothing wrong with it, but it comes with a great risk of being toxic to yourself. This is where the idea of simply showing up and doing your best in the moment becomes essential. It is no longer about producing greatness, but simply producing your best. The pressure cooker turns off, and everything begins to simmer nicely.

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Knowing when to restart is essential to being to able to craft anything, or simply to live. Imagine being in a job you hate (may not be hard), and to be in a field you like or a job you like, you have to step down to nothing, you must restart, is that bad? To most that is the worst possible case, but life is longer than a few days, it's multiple decades, now imagine working the same job for 30 more years, hating every second wouldn't that make you hate everything around you? Let's take the opposite you restart, beginning at 0, let's say it takes 5 years to reach the top, but 20 years into the future, you are happy... Now which would you prefer? This is what life comes down to, is restarting really that bad?

Now imagine every aspect of life, from writing to reading to building a product, being willing to restart after multiple iterations of it have failed is key to being successful. This doesn't mean when something doesn't work out you just abandon it. It means to being okay with restarting, the process must involve doing and editing and fine tuning, if that doesn't work, then going to the drawing board, or perhaps even the ipad. This idea of always needing to move 'forward' is foolish, because it assume forward doesn't involve switchbacks, but switchbacks are the only way to get up a mountain at times. Are they worthless then? Not really, they are essential, and so is backtracking, and restarting.

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Doubting Beliefs

We hold an uncountable amount of beliefs about the way the world works and even more about the way we work, we limit ourselves to what is currently 'known', thus limiting our ability to grow and change in a very dynamic world. Beliefs help shape everything, it is the fact that their is the belief that a plane can fly, that we get on it, yes we have the science, but that too is just beliefs that the universe is constant in the output it provides. This is wonderful because we can live our life with the ability to be carefree, but it comes at a cost, we no longer question any of our beliefs no matter what they are for example "I can't draw, all my drawings turn out to be shit", how does this belief help or the belief "I've always been fat", how does that help? This is where the issue arises, when we choose to believe that all our beliefs are written are itched in our bones we become paralyzed. We give up knowing anything more, and we give up ever being able to expand beyond them.

Once we accept the belief of being able to change our beliefs, we can then alter any belief that doesn't serve us to a belief that helps us reach a new level or simply allowing us to change. We must begin to question each belief with the idea of does this belief serve me, if it doesn't help you why keep it? If a belief simply exists to limit does it belong, better yet does it make you a better person? These questions lead you to down a path of possibilities, now not all of the possibilities are good ones, but now the ability of choice has been created. It begins with being curious, then questioning and back to being curious, be hyper selective of what beliefs you hold onto.

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Double Take On Trust

We are told forgive, and we have all heard the saying 'everyone deserves a second chance', that is what the criminal justice system says it is trying to do, but when is enough, enough? We give away our trust to everyone we see, and most have not earned it, and even worse is when someone has continuously proven that they can not be trusted, all in the name of being a 'good' person. When we hand someone our trust we believe other person will respect the trust that was given to them, and when they don't they have broken it. Of course we may give them another chance, but if the same thing happens, what are the consequences? It should be simple, but we don't like doing it, we simply stop trusting them. We stop putting our faith in them, now does this mean you have to stop talking to them or shun them, not at all; it means you simply should not trust them with anything. This does redefine what your relationship with that other is, and as it should, your trust should be valued and considered as something important, if it is not, then it should be withdrawn.

The idea that trust should never go away between people is a foolish one, this typically applies to family relationships. When we do not take away our trust in another person, we are telling them that we are to be disrespected and treated poorly, we are giving them permission. So ask the question, where does the trust lie? In good faith? Or a in tainted waters?

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Most of us are typically in a rush to move onto the next thing, when we read a book we rush to the next part, we think about moving forward without ever considering the current moment. This need to move onto the next thing hinders our progress on the current thing we are working on, failing to notice the details that exist, failing to notice the joy of doing. This is the mode we live in by default, some of us try to meditate and even then we think about when it will be over, or an event in the future - forgetting the joys of breathing, or the minute details of watching the mind create thoughts and how the emotions begin to bubble within us. We are trying to run forward while sitting still, how can we ever do either properly? This is as if we are the chicken without a head, simply running around without any sense, without making any progress in anything.

This constant longing to move onto the next thing, stops from completing the current task completely, and it also stops us from enjoying the moment we are in, which may be phenomenal, but we have tainted it and spoiled it. The mental whooshing to the next event leads to a life of half-assery, destroying the meaning in everything that is done. Is the life anyone wishes to lead? The idea of mentally running from one thing to another thing, and this then manifests in our bodies, we feel the need to be moving, we feel agitation start to arise, then we rush to the next thing. We didn't take the time to do what we were doing properly, we didn't take the time to calm the mind (even as I write this, I can feel the whoosh).


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Agitation The Path To Peace

We are taught that being agitated is a bad thing, we are taught that means we should change something or do something, but is that actually the case? Or is agitation a sign of how to be at peace?

When agitation arises our next actions determine if that agitation was a good thing or a bad thing, we can either be angry at it arising or we can accept it and learn from it. This opens up two very different paths, one leads to a path of peace and the other to outrage, we must be aware of the choices that arise when we feel agitation, and then pick accordingly - more accurately explore the options, explore where this agitation came from, was it from sitting weird, or was it from someone cutting you off in traffic, or was it from the failure to leave on time? This exploration of agitation allows for growth and makes you open up to the world. It is no longer about good or bad, it is about curiosity, that is vastly different than being extremely reactive to the emotions that are arising. We have to understand that agitation is simply a sign post on a road, it doesn't mean it is good or bad, it is simply showing an intersection of paths, and it may even tell what made it arise. The exploration of this sign post and the paths leading from and away allow for peace to arise, as we have pulled away from being right or wrong, and pushed ourselves toward trying to understand the world around us.

If we never felt agitation, we would never learn what peace is, we would simply be experiencing half the world, now agitation is simply a word that we give meaning to, like good or bad. When we are experiencing anything in the world we attempt to assign a word to it, and give it meaning, and this is where the idea of words having power really applies. We are brining about our own suffering.

The next time agitation arises, what will your actions and thoughts be? Will you explore the great wilds, or try to burn the world down.

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Criticism Or Judgement?

When we are critiquing something we are trying to provide feedback to help that something improve. What is judging something entail making assumptions about a thing and then conveying the thoughts associated with the assumptions. We call criticism a good thing, and we calling judging a bad thing, but we do both simultaneously and the line between them is extremely thin, so there is no intentionality behind these actions, it is simply occurring. That is where the problem lies, the problem isn't that their is criticism or judgement, the problem is there was no thought behind either of those things occurring. This lack of intention leads to continuous judgments of everything and everyone, snap decisions made in an instant without ever considering the possibilities of a person being able to grow. Consider those who are overweight and begin to start going to the gym, some would think "hahaha look at how fat he is", without ever considering the fact that, that person was going to the gym to better themselves - this instant judgement leads to false porterials of others. We never consider the fact that the person may be reaching new heights every second because we have labeled them and sealed their fate, at least within our minds. This overweight person may be doing an exercise wrong, because they are fat and the thoughts associated would be more critical of what is happening, but they are also automatic; there was no foresight to judging them, there was only judgement.

The issue with judging and critiquing is based upon the lack of foresight before doing the action, to alter this behaviour, you must be aware and conscious of it happening at all times (or as much as possible). The judgement can be positive or negative, but both should be treated equally, both should be observed and accepted and then letgo. We are trying to tell our minds or train our minds to stop judging and critiquing right away, without learning or knowing anything. That will allow us to live a free life, where we can talk to and engage with a variety of people before ever locking them down into a cage, and stating that that is all they will ever be and all they ever were.

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Practicing What You Preach

It is easy to type these words, it is easy to tell another what to do, and it is even easier to pretend that you are doing everything you are talking about. That is what kills a person, it begins by not practicing one or two things that you tell others to do, then it seeps into the rest of your life yet the world maintains a false perception of you, believing that you are the things you talk about; leading you to believe you are those things as well, until someone who is all the stuff you preach looks at you and sees right through you. This is when the world aroudn you will come crashing down, you may resist and say you are the things you say you are, or what you tell others to do, but the truth will prevail. This is huge when giving another advice, we give advice to help other people but how can we help another person if we haven't helped ourselves? If we don't take the time out to practice what you are telling them to do then it's just a bunch of lies, even if you think you believe in them.

So the idea of practicing what you preach becomes even harder once you begin to start sharing your thoughts to the world, once you begin to help others more, it's easier to ride your white horse down the path, looking down at all the people around you. It gets harder once you get caught up in the hype of the words you say, you are no longer practicing the words, but are swimming with the words imagining that you are putting in the work and the effort when really you aren't doing any of it. Consider most people that go to counseling, counselling can be extremely helpful to people as it gives them a sounding board for them to go parse apart their thoughts and beliefs, but it is gives the illusion of putting in work and effort in improving yourself. You begin to tell others how useful counseling is, yet you aren't really putting in any work to better your situation, you simply show up to a place hear some words, toss some money and leave. Imagine your life, with all the words you say and all the thoughts you put out into the world, how much of that is practiced? How much of that is simply to show the world that you are 'better'?

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Uncomfortable Growth

Most people know that growth comes from dealing with uncomfortable situations, things that we aren't comfortable in this could be talking to strangers or starting a new hobby. This uncomfortableness is typically avoided because it doesn't feel good so we run back into our comfort zone, and we may push the limits of our comfort zone by dipping our toes into the uncomfortable zone. This works to an extent, it allows us to get more comfortable with being uncomfortable but it is also limiting because instead of progressing further into uncomfort we simply keep dipping our toes in. We never truly jumped in all the way, we never received any wild experiences that we learned from. This is where most of us begin, we begin by dipping our toes into uncomfortableness, then perhaps going deeper or perhaps letting that zone turn into your comfort zone. Those that seek discomfort and seek to jump into it typically have the craziest experiences, one can not predict what they will do, and this allows them to grow beyond the limitations that society has set onto them. This is the key to growing beyond the norm.

It doesn't ever get easier doing things that make you uncomfortable but what does happen is that the things that make you uncomfortable become things that bring you comfort, thus expanding your comfort zone. This expansion of comfort zone is the growth you want, and that is when most people stop progressing, once you have gained something you feel as though it has been completed. This feeling of something being finished is what we like to do with everything in our life, we don't want to continuously work on things because it involves effort - Pretty much we are lazy. The goal is to keep pushing into the things that make you uncomfortable as much as you can, and transform that area into your territory ie your comfort zone.

A game of expansion.

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Spirit Work

Some of us spend a lot of time working our bodies, our minds or our emotions but very few us do stuff for the spirit. Spirit work is the work done to connect to the world and to feel this sense of joy from what you are doing, this is typically doing things we enjoy and that are fulfilling. The keyword in that previous sentence is fulfilling, video games aren't fulfilling, watching tv isn't fulfilling nor is listening to a podcast these are all escapism behaviours or ways of being. We think that is the stuff that truly relaxes us and it can relax us till a point, but it doesn't fulfill our spirit. This is where doing things that involve creation are so beneficial because when we physically create something we are doing spirit work, we are bringing something tangible into the world. Most of the work we do in our daily life is busy work, meaning it is work to bring in money but has no parts that involve creation, no tangible results that one can hold in their hands. It feels pointless and meaningless, we receive no fulfillment our soul does not get nourished by the busy work, it is simply pushed aside.

Spirit work or doing work for the soul involves things you enjoy that make you feel alive these things typically involve creating in some way shape or form. This can range from painting to blacksmithing, and even to making paper cranes, it involves doing something with focus and bringing something real into the world. Every person has a different way to gain fulfillment and to nourish their spirit, so the key is to search for what nourishes your spirit, it may not be the same as your friends, but it doesn't matter what it is, what matters is that it gives you a sense of peace, enjoyment and fulfills something within.

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Army Of Nothing

Friendship is a very precious thing, when you call someone a friend you are telling the world "this is a person I trust with my life and my secrets", but that isn't what you mean, now is it? When we call someone a friend we mean to say "I am acquainted with this person", this is a huge difference than calling someone a friend. The problem arises when you we attach our personal value to the number of friends we have, we are no longer looking at the quality of the friendship, but now we are simply looking at sheer numbers, so of course we would want to call everyone a friend. We spend most of our lives calling everyone we meet a friend all in the grips of being viewed as a social butterfly, someone who is happy and fulfilled, but are all those people your friends? Would they drop everything if you were in trouble and come to your aid? Or would they say "I'm sorry I'm actually super busy this week"? How many people in your life that you call a friend are people you could turn to for anything? How many are simply there because you lived in the same neighborhood or work together? When we start considering who stands beside us we should be extremely selective, because a friend is someone you would go to war for, they are someone you are vulnerable around, allowing them to easily betray you if they so wanted - but they wouldn't want to, or ever betray you because of that mutual bond called friendship.

Lots of people get into relationships with people whom they wouldn't even want to be true friends with because of loneliness, and the same thing applies to the people we call friends. This diminishes your self worth because you are allowing all these people into your life who will suck energy out of you that could be put into you or into those who are true friends. Being selective is a way to protect you and your worth, it forces you to decide if someone will have good intentions for you, or if they simply are someone who is simply around. It is very easy for us to fall in the trap of calling everyone a friend because it has become a habit. Break that habit and choose wisely who you consider a friend because those are the people who should be trusted with your life. Though this is why we have the term close friend, so perhaps the word friend means acquittance.

The phrase true friends is a foolish one because a person you call a friend is a true friend, otherwise they shouldn't even called a friend. Be Selective. Craft greatness.

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Easier Not To Try

How many times have you said "I am too busy" or said that "I am tired" or even worse "it isn't important"? This constant excuse mode for not doing things is dominant in our daily lives that we don't even bat an eye when we do it, it's normalized. Their is a problem with it, and that is that it is easy to not try, to simply say an excuse and leave it at that, now you don't have to worry about it. Imagine facing yourself and saying "hey this is an excuse and you are taking the easy way out" and hammering yourself out like a twisted piece of metal, then yes you could say the excuse but you can't hide behind it and pretend that it is real.

We live in a world where it is easier to lie to ourselves about the amount of work we are actually doing and the amount of excuses we allow ourselves to say because guess what then we don't have to try. We don't have to try to become better people, to live a better life, we can simply drift the rough seas pretending that our boat isn't sinking. Allowing ourselves to take the easy path doesn't ever lead to growth in any fashion but it makes us feel 'good' - the reason for quotes around the word good is because we don't feel good, we typically feel like trash if we truly look at how we are feeling, and then we work to distract ourselves if we do feel that shitty emotion. This is the cycle we live in, a constant need to distract ourselves and a constant need to make excuses, each one feeding the other, so what we must do is break that cycle in some way shape or form. Breaking the cycle is actually very easy to do, but very hard to talk yourself into doing. The best way to break the cycle is not to think about it and just to do it, close your eyes and sink your head into the ocean - the more you think about it, the greater the resistance. How many excuses will you allow yourself to say to yourself, before you have had enough?

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Crafting Your Own Thoughts

When we absorb new information, new ideas from other people we claim them as our own, as if we thought of them but we know we didn't; would that make us a fraud, simply a copycat? When we hear ideas and information we process that information with our perspective thus warping the ideas/information in our own way. This alone wouldn't make the information original thought, but when we hear new information if we think about that information, trying to break it apart to fully understand it and incorporating it into ourselves we make it our own. Crating our own thoughts from other ideas is not hard, and does not make someone a fraud, it makes them intelligent.

Let's say you skip the trying to understand and incorporate it into yourself, and simply just copy it and try to emulate it without thinking, it is still yours. We are copying the ideas in our own way, we can't do them perfectly like the original, as we are not the original, so we are already twisting these new ideas and concepts making thme different from the original. The fact that we exist makes all ideas we read and see original when we implement them, because we are shaped by the perspective we are using, so when we read something that filter, that perspective is being applied to it, thus altering it before it ever enters your brain.

Here is a nice thought, how do you know the color green is the same color someone else was taught was green? We may all be looking at different colors but calling them the same thing because we were taught that is what it is called.

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Power Of Choice

When we were children we believed that we didn't have a choice in doing our homework or listening to our parents, but we did. Those other choices may not have been favorable to us, and most likely had consequences that we did not want, so we chose to do our homework or listen to our parents, but do not get it twisted everything is a choice. We weigh out the benefits of everything, if we don't go to work we may get fired, if we go to work we will be able to pay rent, but all these things are choices, we are always deciding between two options (usually there are a lot more options, but we narrow down very quickly to two). This ability to choose is a super power, we can choose to do work now or later, we can choose to learn this cool thing that interests us or sit and watch TV, these are all choices. The issue is we make everything out to be like we have to do it, we have to do this because 'X' said so, but we never have to do anything. You have to realize you have the power of choice, you choose what to do, flipping the mentality of 'have to' into 'get to' or better yet 'choose to', is essential to getting away from the pits of despair about not having any freedom in your life. You have the most freedom in the world, you get to choose everything you do, you can choose to work somewhere else, you can choose to leave a bad relationship, you can choose to read that book, yes of course there are repercussions to your choices but that is apart of having the ability to choose. The repercussions could be good or bad, but once you make a decision and commit to it, the repercussions are no longer within your control.

This idea of you always having a choice is a gift because now you can do whatever you want, you can figure out what you love or what interests you and go deep into it, or you can walk away from something. You have the freedom to choose but you are not free from the consequences of that choice.

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The Failing Jumps

We jump from thing to the next thing barely scratching the surface of anything, then we wonder why weren't improving, yet we haven't learned anything. We seek knowledge to help improve ourselves and our life searching far and wide, but forgetting about the third dimension, depth. How can we expect to learn anything of true value when we refuse to go deep into one area, we run from one place to the next and then again to the next. The second we start going deep into something it begins to get harder and we then jump to the next thing, looking for a secret entrance that'll answer all our prayers, to what end? This applies to furthering our happiness, to becoming smarter, to having a fulfilling relationship, we jump to the next thing. This jumping from one thing to another thing is normalized, in school we go from one subject to the next, never really learning anything from any of them, and that is up wards of 20 years of our life, mandatory 13 to 16. It is engrained in us, so we don't ever question this jumping from one thing to the next, some do it with relationships jumping from one failed relationship to the next, never going deep within themselves or in a single relationship, always running.

Precious gems are found in the depths of the world, they are not found on the surface of Earth but deep within, the true beauty of something is found within it, consider literature the best written pieces are pieces you return back to, to reread - allowing ourselves to go deep within that work. Now most of us jump from new book to new book, what if we jumped from old book to old book, ie books we have already read, and then find the nuance within each book (of course some books only need to be read once, meaning they shouldn't have been read at all).

Consider your life, and the things you are working on, are you jumping from thing to thing, are you trying to find a secret path? Ask yourself are you truly going deep in anyway shape or form, that is meaningful? That's where you will find the gems that are of value to you.

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Affirmations The New Words Of Prayer

Most young people consider religion foolish and a hoax, they no long welcome prayer believing religion is the death of science and a persons well being. Now we are entitled to think what we want to think, and entitled we are, but now there is a new form of prayer one that is accepted by the young folk. This new form of prayer is called affirmations, it is where you repeat a set of words to yourself or to the world in the hopes that the world will provide you with what you were saying - that sounds an awful lot like praying for something and hoping god will give it to you. Now here is the fun thought in all of this, is either thing wrong or bad? No, it's just our way of communicating with the world. What we are trying to do is make our beliefs and our way of being align with the words we are consistently repeating. This works because we like the world to be consistent and more so we like ourselves to be consistent with what we are saying or believing, so if we continuously say the same set of words even if we don't believe in them, we will begin to believe in them and cause ourselves to align with those words, because who wants to knowingly lie to themselves? This little reaction makes praying and affirmations extremely powerful, it makes those actions seem like magic, the world gave you what you wanted (see the book "The Secret"), but what is actually happening is you gave yourself what you wanted, you spoke yourself into existence.

This makes affirmations the same as prayer, simply an updated version of it, but it also makes affirmations extremely useful. It is like a mini hack on how we think, how we can launch ourselves in a new direction. Do affirmations work all the time? Not at all, it is a slow process but a process when combined with other actions could be extremely powerful. Isn't this like a super power then? Speaking the world into existence, because it all boils down to perspective, so affirmations are altering your perspective thus allowing new ways of viewing the world to appear. So the next time you bag on praying, or bag on affirmations, think about it, they are one in the same.

Personal note: I hate the word affirmations, and dislike the idea of them, but recent thinking and chatting with others has made me rethink the notions I have about them. Thus the birth of this post.

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Technological Debt

When we were introduced to technology we were simply handed something and we went with it, we didn't question how good it was, if it met our needs or if it was something that would last a lifetime, we simply got what our friends had or what our parents gave us. Now we spent years using the devices and technology we have been using, and when you think about switching to a new piece of software or a new piece of technology, let's say going from android to IOS (apple), we think about how we only know the android ecosystem, we know how to use it perfectly and all our stuff is synced to google drive, and we have our google accounts. The jump and switching of all the data and storage and information along with learning a new technology is a heavy burden, it involves a lot of time and effort, but this effort may pay off in the long run if you picked wisely. This is where decision making and looking at the benefits of the technology you are investing time into is important, you can decide if it is worth switching over to a new system, or if it is better not to switch over at all. Technological debt increases the more things you start using things in an ecosystem, the more you invest into something, with no way to easily export everything into a new system; it also increases when you start spreading wider into a technology because now you use a ton of software in that ecosystem that may not transfer over into a new ecosystem. All this boils down to making the choice to change ecosystem a very costly one in terms of time and perhaps money. The key question that should be arising is how do we stop technological debt?

You begin by keeping things simple, using cross platform tools, using only a few of those tools and then keeping steady with them, this allows for easy conversion from one ecosystem to another. You will not be constrained by any one platform, and if there is a tool that is very niche then invest into that tool, and when you want to go into a new ecosystem you can eat that technological debt, because it won't be spread out over everything you do, it'll be only one thing.

Technological debt is always accruing, the key is to limit it, and to be okay with it being there. It'll always be there, but you must be willing to accept that and not allow that to stop you from making the right choice FOR YOU, no matter the software or the ecosystem - pick what is best for you (hopefully something that'll last you awhile).

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"Fuck, Jim got the promotion and not me, that's such bullshit." This is a common occurrence when something doesn't go your way, or life is unfair towards you in some manner, you may get angry and begin to question the world, blaming everyone but yourself. "But I didn't do anything", exactly you didn't do anything, so why should you get anything? Blaming yourself isn't the answer but it is closer to the solution than blaming the world. We seek to blame the world because it hurts to blame ourselves, it hurts because now we are on the hook for it, we need to put words to action because it is on us. Now if it is the worlds fault, then we don't have to do anything. This raises the question of what can we do about the unjust nature of the world?

The question we must ask ourselves is "What are you going to do about it?", this isn't a question about what you can do, or the chances of success you will have on doing an action, but a question about what are you actually going to do about the world being unfair towards you. We as people have many options when it comes to this, we can mop around, we can quit and start something new, or we can work harder and find a solution to our problem. All these methods are valid ways of living but only some of them will get you to where you want to be, and that is to make the world more 'fair' towards you. When you ask yourself what are you going to do about it, you are trying to find ways to tilt the ship so it is balanced and won't tip over, find things you can do, tangible things that you think will help the situation. This isn't about finding things that will solve the problem, but simply will help solve the issue and get to it... The other choice is complain about it and be angry at the world, but that won't get you anywhere. Take the first tangible solution you have and run with it, build on it, figure out what you are going to do about the unjustness that has been done to you. Stop complaining and figure out what you are going to do about it, what you can and will do, not what you want to do, but what you are able to do. This alone will change your life. "What are you going to do about it?"

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Feeding The Beast

We are always feeding a beast within us, this could be an addiction or could be a way of thinking or a habit that we have, but we always feeding a beast within us. When we feed the beasts within us, they get larger, they start wanting more attention, more energy, more effort, so they'll continue to get bigger as the other beasts within you begin to shrink and get smaller as they aren't getting enough attention to grow and to drag you towards them. This competition of the beasts within is a competition of your attention and energy, which is good at the beginning because then everything is starting of equal, but some beasts have an advantage over other beasts, such as addiction and fasting hitting dopamine beasts. The gap begins to widen once you begin to feed a particular beast over the others such as videogames or daydreaming ones, they will begin to swallow up the others and stifle their growth, thus making it impossible for them to catch up, think about how the ones who have money can easily make more money and those that have nothing struggle to make anything.

Right this second you may have thought of the beasts you have been feeding and how you want to feed different beasts, and this is the moment you have a chance of swinging things in your favor instead of having to fight a monster that will only get bigger the longer you feed it. You can have a beast you can ride into battle, perhaps it is the beast of a habit of exercising daily or just keep feeding the things you dislike and avoid what you need to do. We are crafting our own monsters every single moment, and those monsters that are being fed will need to be slaughtered one day or they'll consume you, will you be strong enough to take them on? Do you have enough beasts under your command? Or just a unruly pack of beasts ready to devour every piece of you.

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Self Created Challenges

We assume that the challenges we face in life are not our own doing, that the universe put these problems in front of us, and screw it for doing so, but what makes a problem a problem? Our perspective makes things either a good thing or a bad thing, so aren't the problems that are in your life made by your mind, doesn't that also mean that you can shift your perspective so the problems go away? This way of thinking can be helpful, but isn't necessarily useful in improving your situation (in terms of the physical reality and social norms). Shifting the current dilemma of perspective to growth we can easily argue that these challenges in our life are self created so that we can grow and become better humanbeings. When we face hardships we must grow and change to match those hardships, so if our brain always creates hardships for us, then we will always be growing to be better. It is no longer about if something is a problem or not, it is now about how we can grow as individuals. All these problems in our life force us to upgrade ourselves to become more understanding, to become stronger, to become more resourceful, to force us to action of some sort.

All these 'problems' or challenges that are in front of us are no longer problems but opportunities, we can now grow forever. The real issue is that our perspective must change in order for us to see that problems are really opportunities for us to grow, and even this issue is an opportunity to grow. This shift in thinking opens up an entire world, a new way to interact with the universe, no longer triffled by problems, but riffled with opportunities.

This also brings up another good post which is recommended, changing the words we use or the meanings of words that we use can vastly improve our perspective. It is an easy way to go onto a new path. Check out the post Words & The Spells They Cast.

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The Chase

We chase after highs to carry us through life, we chase after relationships and we chase after all the things we desire, but what are we running towards? We run towards a thing we believe to be happiness, forgetting the present moment and all that it holds. Thinking about how we feel well sitting, how we shift the second we begin to observe it, what about everything else that is occurring in this instance? Are we enjoying any of it? When we are in the company of our friends, do we long to be in a different location or in different circumstances? At what point will you reach happiness, whenever you get near it, it moves to something bigger and better. This way of living is circular, like a dog chasing it's tail expect we aren't as happy as a dog, we continue to chase something and when we get close to the goal we push the goal further away and say "When I reach that, I'll be happy" - doesn't that make your entire existence unhappy until you 'reach' that goal? This chase is never ending, and the cliche of if you don't find happiness here you won't find it anywhere becomes more apparent.

This brings about the idea of meditation, which is when you do 'nothing' for a set period of time; the true art of being fully present. When we think of meditation we have all these preconceived notations about it, and then we want to reach those notations, once again chasing. This chase never ends, and the point of meditation is to make you aware of that and simply exist in the moment, even if it is for 30 seconds, or an hour, any amount of time will slowly help build up that module and help all the other modules build up as well - see post Modular Building for more details on modules. Meditation becomes more about being, instead of chasing, when those ideas of what should be happening or where you should be occur, our goal is to observe and let go, allowing us to more present in the moment.

How far will you keep chasing before you start searching for something more than simply running in circles to find meaning in your life? Everything begins in an instant, when will that instant manifest for you?

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Modular Building

We pick and choose the building blocks we are willing to work for allowing us to build ourselves. We rarely think of the things we do as important or significant, but each thing that gets some of our time is building ourselves in some way. This could be building ourselves in a really positive way, or in a negative way. Consider ourselves an empty shell and then consider everything we do as the builders of modules such as a fitness module, a thinking module, etc etc, every moment we are building up a module in some way, investing points into different aspects within a module; if we begin to consider this as the primary method of existing the choices we make become extremely important, do we decide to binge eat chips, or masturbate seven times in a day. Whatever the decision we make we are building up that module, we are building up that part of ourselves for better or for worse, we are doing that. This idea of modules makes every moment precious as we start gaining points in modules, we begin to see the compounding effects of working on a module.

If we take this idea of modules and begin to incorporate it into our life we can begin to see how we are built, the actions we have taken and how we have gotten to where we are. Of course we can not do a hard reset on ourselves, so any investment into any module becomes solidified with some modules decaying faster than others. We can't redo our existence, we are stuck with the modules we have previously built but we can change the allocations of resources that we invest into each module, thus allowing our entire makeup and existence to change over time. Changing is only a matter of where the energy is being invested, which modules are being built up. We still have to understand that we put bad information into a module that module will be built poorly, but if we streamline and think about how we are building ourselves we can begin to have modules helping build each other. This is the manner of exponential growth that you want to utilize when you are building up your modules. The key is that each module should help another module grow, find a groove and build out a path - see Tinkered Thinking's post on Natural Spring, this will lead to your growth making more growth.

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Grasping At Thoughts

Thoughts and emotions arise through habits which we never chose nor were we aware of them forming, yet we believe they are us? We believe that they have a right to command our lives, and to form our reactions, but we don't even know if they are our own. We can't predict the next thought that will arise in our minds, right now you may be drifting to a random thought that just popped into your head, did you make that thought appear, or did it just happen. This 'happening' is all thoughts and emotions are, they are not us, they are simply a byproduct of existence. This becomes a hard pill to swallow because it makes us question our very existence, we associate so strongly with the thoughts that arise, and the emotions we feel that we don't know anything else. It makes sense to resist the idea of thoughts and emotions not being us, and simply a byproduct of existence if it is all we know. If we run with the assumption that thoughts and emotions arise from habit energy, then we can transform the way we think and the way we feel emotions which will change our entire perspective on life. Instead of reacting right away and associating with the thoughts we can take a step back and reflect on if this aligns with what we want, and if it doesn't we can just disregard it. Of course we also have the option of exploring that thought that arose to see where it leads, but we shouldn't take anything as if it is our own. The second we take the thoughts personally we lose our ability to change what is appearing, we lose our grasp on what it means to be human.

We continuously take our emotions and thoughts personally, reacting as if they are our entire existence, without exploring if we actually believe in the thought that arose. This leads us to live at the whims of thoughts and emotions, never expanding beyond what we believe we know, what kind of life is that? Stuck in place, never exploring the depths of who you are, which is a never ending experiment in living.

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The Doubts Of Living

If you have ever asked for directions and started to follow them you'll arrive at a point where you begin to question if the directions were accurate and if they will get you to where you want to go, you could be going in the right direction, but you could also be going in the wrong direction; how do you know if they gave you the correct directions? You could ask someone else for directions and see if they match up, but lets assume there is no one else there. What then? The answer is simple, you just keep following the directions until you get to an end, it may not be the end you are looking for but then you will know if they were the correct or incorrect directions. You either arrive where you want to go, or are still lost, both provide you with an answer. This tangible example can be applied to trying to figure out the right path in life for yourself, and also for better understanding your spirit. You will pursue a certain direction or someone's advice but then halfway through it you begin to search for something new, something quicker, thus soiling the advice. This search for a different path helps forge greater doubt in all your future decisions, yes you can be wrong, but you can also be right as well.

This all becomes about trusting yourself and trusting that you can figure it out and keep pursuing whatever you are doing. If you don't trust yourself then that is what you need to figure out first. Doubt is normal, but it's what you end up doing with that doubt that makes a world of difference.

The importance of this piece of writing, at least personally was the fact that halfway through I started trying to figure out how to block programs on my computer and what I needed to do tomorrow. See this avoidance trying to take over, in a 'productive manner', but really it wasn't the task at hand.

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The Minimum Viable Effort

There are days when nothing feels right, where nothing really wants to get done and those are the days where you want to get the crucial work done - if we strip away your day to day busyness, what is left? That is what you want to get done, keeping the vehicle that is your life moving, it may slow down but it won't stop. You want to put the minimum effort to keep it running, so you must pick what is essential to keep it running, and this varies depending on who you are; some people need to workout daily, read and go to work, others may only need to workout and ensure they drink water - neither of those options is 'bad' or 'good', the key is does it keep the vehicle moving forward? If the answer is yes, then you are doing your job.

We all enter funks, or have days where we feel fatigued, and that is when we need to focus on getting the essentials taken care of. We need to stop worrying about the things that are accessory, the things we do for show for the world or the things that won't fall apart if not done daily (for example checking email). This balance is especially important when one falls ill and is sick as well. Consider the idea of an object at rest wants to remain at rest, the second you stop, it'll get impossibly hard to get moving again, consider the post on resistance, it explains this concept perfectly.

Of course this doesn't mean not to reach out for more, but it does mean take care of the essential before you do anything that day or in that moment.

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Struggle The Craft Of Strength

The art of learning is wrapped tightly with the ropes of struggle, every step forward loosens the ropes ever so slightly, but if you can move forward you can move backwards. The struggle of trying to figure out something new, is beyond belief, the harder the challenge the tighter the ropes, the harder it is to wiggle your way free; the easier it is to give up and just walk away from it. When you jump into the unknown you will be surrounded by the fog of confusion and then tightly wound in the ropes of struggle, where when you take a step forward you are getting pulled back half a step. The optimist may view this still being progress, and they would be correct, the dangerous aspect of this pull backwards is that the second you try to turn around to think about giving up it'll pull you even further back. Now the decision to give up is easier to make, to just give up in a fog of confusion. These challenges are apart of the learning process, it is apart of growing and becoming stronger, it is the price one must pay to enter a higher level.

Imagine going to the gym, the struggle to lift a set of weights is what builds strengths, this is you struggling to lift those weights. The struggle is the craft of strength, strength can not be built without struggle, learning can't occur without struggle, sometimes the amount of struggle is extremely high, other times the amount of struggle is low, but the struggle to achieve is always there. The goal as a humanbeing trying to learn, trying to grow is to use that struggle as a guide, it is showing you the path you need to travel down. Using struggle as a guide allows you to pursue things you would otherwise give up because you met some resistance, it shows you that the thing you are trying to do is worthwhile. This is the point of struggle, everyone can do it, but not everyone is willing to struggle and suffer to learn something.

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Beyond The Box

Boxes are set all around us, and typically we set those boxes up, because then we can easily define things, keeping them organized. Our thinking is that the boxes are meant to keep things separated and keep things organized and easy to explain things, but they also have negative parts to them. Once we define a box and set it's limitations that is it, that is its limits, you can't go past them unless you break the box and get rid of it, otherwise we can move within that box and if we wish to leave we must close the door to that box before opening another box. This idea of separation stops ideas and concepts from connecting and evolving, but that is a tiny part of the bigger picture. The bigger is that the world is limitless, but the second we create a box for an idea we have now told it it's limits, we are no longer limitless in our ability to shape the idea and expand it. How foolish is that? We could do anything, we could be completely free but we choose to chain ourselves down, in the hopes of what?

If we were to get rid of the boxes and definitions that we have placed on the world when we are about to outgrow the box, that allows us to organize our thoughts and the world, but still allow for infinite growth, limitless expansion. The boxes can be used as guides instead of cages, getting rid of them, leaving them open allowing ideas to intermingle but still giving you the sanity you seek - the control you want.

Allow change to occur, don't allow yourself to be defined by the goal you set out, instead let that goal be a guide. Let the topic you decided to write on, evolve and grow as you write. Is it not the title of the post? Cool then change the title, let the words evolve as they go, when the world shifts under your feet, shift with it.

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Cultivating Creativity

When do we notice that we are experiencing something? When are we just going through the motions and not noticing the creative juices flowing? Or when are we stifling our creative mind, and stunting our curiosity? We can also flip this line of questioning to be how can we better cultivate the creative mind and living in the moment. It begins with silence, not the silence of their being no noise, but the silence of no music blaring, no podcast playing, no tv show playing in the background (yes movies count). When we are forced to be present in what we are doing or we are forced to look inward at what is occurring we are giving permission to our mind to explore the universe as it is. It's no longer being distracted, being told what to think, it is trying to connect new and old ideas. You want your mind to be as free and creative as possible, the more input you give your mind, the less it can output, and the lower the quality of the output. Does that make sense? Let's assume no, so let's break it apart.

When you start absorbing information your mind doesn't question or explore that information, it takes it in and if it likes it, it integrates, if it doesn't then their is a conflict where it tosses that information out. Something else can happen, it may not even be thinking of the information that is being inputted, it is simply taking in information so that way you don't have to think for yourself. For those of you whom think for yourself, and try to break things apart, you know it is hard work, now imagine being told what to think, or what to imagine in your mind... You don't have to do any of the hard work, it's been 'done' for you. Your mind goes into autopilot, and it loves that as it is saving energy, like your phone when it enters power saving mode. Is this a good thing though? Yes, it was a wonderful thing in the beginning of mankind, but now most of us have an abundance of food, so this whole expenditure of energy is actually worthwhile. It allows us to make more informed decisions, it allows us to explore how we think, and what is going inside. It also increases our creativity because we are just exploring instead of being in a coma. Silence helps cultivate this, because you are no longer absorbing and taking in all the garbage of the world.

Find the stuff that is truly worth listening to, truly worth watching and reading; then when you want to listen/watch/read that information do it intentionally. Do it intentionally and not on in the background, you will gain so much more and still allow yourself to be creative in the off time.

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The Proximity Effect

There exists a saying that says "tell me the 5 people you spend the most amount of time with and I'll tell you your future", now how true is this thinking? Consider this when you listen to a music you dislike often you begin to grow fonder of it, or either hate it, you don't stay in the position of dislike for long - a side must be picked. Now imagine this with the people in your life, you grow fonder and feel deeper for those whom you spend the most time with, the ones you talk to the most. You may start acting like them, you may start falling in love, or you may begin to despise them, it really just depends. This is the proximity effect in a nutshell, something we don't think about or even try to cultivate. Do you consider who you talk to on a daily basis? Do you think about how they are influencing you? The kicker is you may think they aren't influencing you at all, but the mind is a tricky bugger and we simply lack the awareness to notice the subtle influence. Is this our fault? That isn't a useful question, what is useful is the question of who is this person? Take in all the negatives and positives and see how they view the world, figure out if this person is adding to your life or subtracting from it. The better way to think about it is what good qualities do you think you may gain from this person, and then take the counterpoint, what negative qualities will you gain from this? The most important part of that previous sentence is that now you can decide if you want this person in your life, but we as people don't like kicking people out of our lives - thus the more applicable advice is watch out for those habits occurring in yourself; be on the lookout for the negatives and the positives, then cultivate the ones you want.

The thing with the proximity effect is that it is constantly occurring, it is happening right this second. So think about who you want in your life and who will help you grow. Pull away from those that pull you down, this is different from slowing you down. Slowing you down means they are trying to grow and reach where you are at, and trying to improve their life; pulling you down means they don't care about your growth and wellbeing nor their own. We all go through phases and it's important to help people that are in a temporary funk, but notice if they are reaching out and trying to help themselves.

Yes, the proximity effect is about sound and microphones, but read and read are the same word they can be used in two different situations meaning two different things. Yes, that was a poor analogy but that's what you are getting.

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The Positives Of The Negative

We begin to question the world and ourselves when we are feeling sad or angry, when we are in a negative mental state. Now when we are happy we don't question the feelings or our thoughts, we love being happy; it's the best feeling in the world. We don't care why we are happy or what brought that upon us, all we care about is that we are happy. How about when we are frustrated, or sad? What do we do then? Do we simply accept it and go along for the ride? Or do we begin to search for something? This something could be anything from why you are feeling the way you are feeling to what is your purpose in the universe.

Happiness is a wonderful thing, it has all the pieces we want in the world, it has joy, positive thinking and just general dopamine and serotine hits of the highest levels, so why would we be curious during that time? Why explore new places within you or around you when you are perfectly happy in the current situation you are in? On the other hand when you are feeling any negative emotion, you become curious, you want to know why it began, or how long it'll stay, perhaps what it is. Now you may also search for why you are alive, or how that interaction went and why it went that way. See how many things arise when you are feeling a negative emotion? You begin to get curious and you are more willing to change, this change isn't inherently positive or negative, it is simply the willingness to change. When we are in a negative state, we want it gone so we are more willing to try new things, to find new ways of living and to improve our life. This doesn't happen when we are happy. When we are happy we are content, but when we are sad or angry or frustrated we are not content with our life or the situation at hand - so what do we do? We reach for something more, we seek to grow.

What will you do the next time you are feeling down? Will you explore that feeling, and grow from it? Or still simply view it as terrible and horrible, wanting it to end as soon as possible.

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Thoughts Of Another

What were you just thinking? What was your last thought? How sure are you about that being your last thought? Now tell what someone else is thinking? What they are feeling? Now you might have some idea based on context clues, body language but can you tell yourself with certainty what they are thinking? The sad thing is you can ask the other person what they were thinking, but people lie with ease, so can you trust that? Perhaps it's something more complicated than how it is currently being explained. Even if it is more complicated, how can you ever assume to think you understand what another is going through, or what they are feeling; what we are doing is overlapping our thoughts, our perspective over the situation, over the person and saying "yes this is it". This can be pretty damn accurate depending on your awareness of another, but it will never be fully accurate, because as Naval mentioned in an interview life is played in single player mode, and that we are simply viewing the world from our lens.

Writing is such an interesting expression, as it simply flows until it doesn't and that signifies the ending of the post, and sometimes that ending, or the post isn't what you wanted, but that is the consequence of ones limited ability - this can be expanded of course, by working on writing even more and improving ones thinking, but this is where it begins. It begins by putting in some effort and doing it consistently.

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Reactions Of The Inner Self

When the anger of a person begins to rise, the yelling starts and the little person within us begins to look for it's best weapon, it's best defense, which may be a strong offense. These weapons are how we react when someone begins to yell, when someone starts to attack us, do we go for a stab in the back as the conversation comes to a close, do we attack them and not the argument, or do we generalize their entire being by using 'always' or 'never'. The question becomes how do you react to others encroaching on your boundaries and your spirit? Do you hold the line, or do you let them run amok but once you get fed up simply explode, not explaining or setting a boundary but simply raging?

The question of how you are reacting is important because it tells you the condition of your spirit, it tells you the conditioning of the past, the pain of the past and how it has shaped you. This allows you to strategize and figure out how you ideally want to react, how you want to protect yourself and guard your boundaries. Aggressive when protecting yourself, yet not lashing out. Observing your outer actions is an excellent way to figure out the state of your inner spirit. The path of recovery of the inner spirit is a long and hard one, it may take a few months but may also take a decade because imagine your boundaries being overrun from when you were a child and then the responses of anger and lashing out getting ingrained deeper and deeper into your brain, until it is second nature. To repair all that damage begins by slowly rebuilding the boundaries, by retraining yourself, by retraining your inner warriors to protect your spirit. In the start all you may be capable of is noticing and noting down your reactions, then perhaps finding the pattern, and then further along you start standing up for your boundaries, every once and awhile; this is the process of rebuilding your empire.

Whomever said it is easy rebuilding your self-worth and changing the way you react to the outside world is a extremely difficult task, one that you must consider as a journey, like a nation building a bridge or changing their governments, they'll take a couple of dozen years to accomplish it. Consider yourself as a nation, and begin to rebuild.

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What Excuse Do You Have?

What is the excuse you keep telling others? What is the excuse you are telling yourself? What reason do you keep finding to stop yourself from touching the stars? Why? Most people have an excuse they default to, that they fall back on when they don't want to put in that effort to achieve something or even do something. What is that excuse for you? Why do you seek a reason not to hold the universe in your hands?

We seek something more than the existence we currently hold, yet we never want to leave where we are at. So how do we break this pattern, of self abuse (yes, this is a low threshhold for the word self-abuse)? We must notice the excuse we use, and then break it apart as to why it doesn't make sense, logically splitting the argument apart until we can't use it again. Another way that is more effective but requires a lot of willpower is to push past the excuse and just do it. If you think about it, everything comes down to either doing it or not doing it, so it really is that simple.

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The Unseen Path

We seem to want to believe that we can see all the paths in front of us, and that we 'know' the paths of the past, yet what will occur in a week? What paths can you notice? We want to have some sense of control in our life, so we try to control the path we are on, we try to guide our life into a particular lane. When we try to get this sense of control, we don't care if the path is bad, or if it is good, we like to say that it is ours. We want to be able to be certain because life is full of uncertainty, if we can hold onto any certainty we jump at it. This holds true for relationships, careers, and anything else in this world.

We want to be able to be able to say that we know where we are headed, we don't want the universe to control the flow. When we head down a certain path we forget about all the paths that aren't seen leading us to forget that humanbeings are explorers; when we were children we explored the world, remaining curious the entire time. We are now older, and we shed off our curiousity cape and now we drive in between the lines. This killing of curiosity, destroys the chances of stumbling on a path that may be phenomenal for you, it may still happen but the chances are reduced.

This search for certainty causes us more pain than the exploration of the world, but it comes at a very perceived initial cost; that is believing in the universe, and thus believing in yourself.

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The Creeping Of Resistance

We consider friction just a physics concept but it impacts us in ways we never think about. Friction is a type of resistance, as we build up a habit we are pressing the gas peddle every time we do that habit, and the friction of the road(life) slows us down ever so slightly, but we don't notice it because an object in motion wants to stay in motion, thus allowing momentum to build. This building of momentum, of speed gives us a feeling of ease, where we think we can not be stopped, this is wonderful for those that keep building on it, but terrible for those who ease up on the gas. The second we stop doing that habit, the friction takes over, the resistance begins to creep and grow, slowing down your momentum, making it harder to speed up, harder to get that momentum back.

This is where we reach the climax, where we must decide if we start up the habit right this second or continue to let it slip away. We can easily ignore the slowing down, the resistance building because we are still moving forward, so we can easily blame that, but once we stop... you can't blame anything other than yourself. Now we reach a new problem, an object that is at rest, wants to remain at rest, this is when resistance grows quickly and fast; the longer you wait, the greater it gets, the harder it becomes to start again.

Maintain the habits, show up, that is half the battle.

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Eroding Solitude and Silence

Many many years ago silence and solitude were easy to find, easy to have incorporated in your life, but now we have the entire universe in our pocket. This universe allows us to easily distract ourselves, by listening to a podcast, music, a youtube video - let's be real here, it's never just one video, it's a handful, or simply scrolling through an endless feed of nothing. These actions that are taken are done out of this wanting to feel accomplished, informed or simply to learn something but in this seeking of knowledge and distraction we give up on self reflection, we give up on solitude and silence. When we go for a walk or get up from our desk, we reach and grab our phone, perhaps our headphones, and start seamlessly streaming something so we can keep moving forward. This illusion of moving forward does nothing for you, it simply distracts you from looking within, eroding the silence and solitude that only comes in small slivers.

We continue to seek things from the outside world, hoping that a solution will show up, chasing the easiest solution possible, but this destroys your chances of finding anything within, finding the pieces you hold as an identity, finding the peace that is hidden away, and even finding the truth of the universe, whatever that might be.

When you are driving your car do you play music, or the radio or listen to a podcast? When you feel the urge it comes out of habit because when you sit in silence for an extended period of time (sadly this means 5 minutes) you are forced to look within, then you see all the demons swimming around, but you miss all the pieces and flakes of gold that shine back, that show you who you are; maybe you don't want to see yourself, the monster you are, but then you'll never see the goodness of yourself, the saint you may be.

This whole idea of seeking outside of yourself tarnishes your ability to reflect on living, it reduces your mind into mush, instead of understanding yourself you focus your efforts into understanding others. This question arises, who in your life can you sit in silence with? What does that mean? If you and a friend are sitting together hanging out, which ones can you simply sit in silence with and still feel comfortable? Perhaps that is impossible because you can't sit in silence on your own, you have eroded all solitude because it is something that scares you - you are scared of yourself.

As time goes riverbanks may get eroded and start destroying the river and possibly roads, and if it is not caught in time, it'll collapse and the costs of repairing it may be extremely high - consider the article of Preventative Measures, the cost is much higher to be reactive, than it is to be proactive.

Do not let the silence fade away to the black of this screen.

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Preventative Measures

When do we decide to take care of ourselves, or to put in the work we know we need to put in? Is it before it is needed? Or when their was no other choice? Consider this real world example, most companies had no way to work from home, but then COVID hit, what happened? They slapped together some bullshit so that way they could still make money while everyone worked from home, this ability to work from home would never have arisen, but had to arise because of a need. Now imagine game development companies that had previously setup methods for employees to work from home, they had setup preventative measures that saved them from sure disaster, and more so allowed them to thrive. Now this also applies to the human being, the you that is reading this.

When do you start working out? When do you start studying? When do you start doing yoga? When do you... step up and take care of ourself? Is it after a doctor says "hey if you don't lose 50lb, you'll die" or is it after an injury, or perhaps a failed exam? All these methods of self-care and self improvement occur are reactive measures, they are taken after the problem occurs, now for most problems this isn't an issue, and provides you with the motivation to achieve what the desired result, but... this isn't always the case. Sometimes you have reached the brink and their is no turning around, there is only going forward, hoping that you'll be okay on the other end and not broken into a thousand pieces. This is because we rely on reactive care for every problem, even most tech solutions arise as a reaction to a problem, not to prevent the problem from ever occurring.

If we take actions to take care of ourselves before we get near the brink we can continuously improve and never reach the brink, if we get injured it won't be as bad, because we took care of ourself before we got injured. This type of thinking can apply to anything and everything, it can allow you to lead a better life, create a better experience for those who use your products etc.

Shift your mental, and solve the potential issues before they arise.

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The Art Of Language

This post was inspired by Tinkered Thinking. Looking to connect with Tinkered Thinking? You can hit them up on Twitter: @TinkeredThinker.

What do words mean? Do we ever think about th meaning of words when we say them? More accurately do we think about how others interpret the meaning of the words we use? Perhaps we all believe we hold the same definition as everyone else, yet we really don't know how others use words or anything of the sort. This makes communicating with others a lot harder, because the use of language between individuals is so different, even if it is only slightly different, it does add up and compound.

Let's take a real world example, the word "happiness" when I typically use the word happiness, I mean to be at peace, just a little bit above peace, whereas when most people use the word happiness they mean to be having a peak experience. Now imagine having a conversation about happiness with a friend, and you hold the definition of having a peak experience and they hold the meaning of being slightly above peace, this slight disconnect may not mean much in this scenario, and your friend won't make a big of deal of it, they will smile and continue the conversation; yet the feeling of what did they mean by that sentence won't really leave them. This feeling gets amplified as the topics of discussion get more important, more heated, now the meaning of words makes a huge difference. A slight disconnect can leads to a large fissure occurring between you and another; yet in your mind you believe you made things perfectly clear. So you now are solidified in your position and believe you are right, and the other person will be solidified in their position and believe they are right - imagine how this rift will grow as time goes on.

This little thing, this little mistake could mean nothing in one interaction, but consider how many interactions are occurring in this moment, how many people are in fights, how many people are simply talking, all these little differences in meaning add up, creating a rift unlike any other.

Now of course we need a solution to this and the manner in which we can do that is getting comfortable with knowing a word doesn't mean what it means unless you specify what it means, this means communicating with others, asking them what they meant by saying a particular word; now yes you can google the word but how do you know what they meant by that word? "Awe Shit", "Dude you're the shit! That's incredible!", "You're a piece of shit", "You're shit" - all these sentences use the same word, all in different meanings, yet your brain interpreted them all to mean something, depending on context clues, now in certain places you are wrong that wasn't the intention, but you may be right.

So take the time to get comfortable with knowing a word doesn't mean what it means unless you specify what it means.

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Maintaining Organization

Organization is so paramount in cultivating a sense of control which in turn helps us feel stable as we tumble around in the universe, so the key is how do we maintain organization? Most of us dislike organizing and cleaning our homes every week, or month or day, whatever suits your fancy, yet it is vital to us feeling like we have the ability to get things done in a productive manner. So where to begin, now this varies from person to person, but you must begin by cleaning and organizing everything, everything. This organization you are doing is the the setting up of a base of operations a place where you can then add onto, the key to organization and even productivity is that you gain more when you subtract and you gain less when you add. How does subtracting lead to gaining more? Simple, there are less things to worry about, less steps to take, less work to do, and therefore you being the lazy being you are, are more inclined to do it. Now once you have your place organized and cleaned, things become easier, their is less work on your plate.

The real work begins with keeping things organized and clean, taking 5 minutes out every evening to cleanup any messes made, to reorganize the things that have been laid out due to laziness. This 5 minutes a day will protect you from you, allowing you to maintain an organized and clean home/workplace, this will also lead into you feeling more organized about the things you need to do and calmer as the world around you feels as if it is in 'your' control.

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The Compassionate War

There is a war going on inside of us and going on all around us, this war is all about compassion, compassion towards others, and towards ourselves while not being walked all over. This is the hardest balance to maintain, how do you remain kind to others and yourself without losing yourself in the sauce? Let's say we feel an extremely negative emotion and we want this emotion to go away, and so we fight with it, we fight with ourselves to hopefully get rid of it; in order to win the war against this emotion we must be compassionate. So now we are in a path where we must choose how to go about this particular task, because in some aspects we want to solve it and never think about it again, in other aspects we may have a large amount of curiosity and simply wish to explore it. This makes life harder in some ways because we don't want to lose, or feel like we are losing and we definitely don't wish to endure more pain than we have to, so what can we do? The thing with compassion is we must feel the pain that is arising and try to understand it, we can't simply avoid it or run away from it. We must feel every aspect of it, in order to surpass it (even thinking about surpassing it is avoiding and running away from it, which is extremely interesting).

This is where the balancing act becomes so important, to not be swallowed up by the pain or by others we must defend ourselves, perhaps by distracting ourselves, or being a little standoffish with others, but if we favor those things too much we lose the opportunity to truly understand and to grow. So the question becomes how can we win this compassionate war? Perhaps the issue is the idea of winning, we wish to win this war, but perhaps it isn't about winning, it may be a war where peace is made through a compromise(Yes, those wars are extremely rare and if it is truly a compromise made by both sides then that is even rarer, but the ones who do end up doing such things, save so much time and stop so much bloodshed from occurring.). If we gave up the idea of winning, then we would only be trying to understand, which will lead to us better being able to cope and to explore.

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Who is The One That is Prepared?

We all know someone that we can turn to for advice, for help, someone who is prepared, but do we ever consider why that person is the way they are - what trials they have gone through? Here is a flip side to that same thought, when we plan to do something with some people we may not prepare as much as we normally would, because we know this person will be fully prepared. Isn't that something everyone wants to be? The one that holds the fort down, the one who is prepared and ready for anything. We go through the majority of our youth having teachers be the ones that are preparing things for us, and keeping us held accountable, then we get jobs and our boss keeps us accountable, along with money. Yet when do we ever hold ourselves accountable? When are we expected to be prepared for something, when their is no need to prepared? This could be going swimming to a friends death, who is the one you turn to, the one who is prepared?

Typically the person we see as the one who is the most prepared and the one who we turn to is someone we respect, and someone we want to become; yet do we think about how they got there? The things they have done? The steps they took to achieve what they have? Better yet do we ever ask them how they got to the place they are at? Some of course may not know how they are the way they are, and of course others may have a very good idea of why they are the way they are. This brings up a very important point, how does these people do in chaos?

Chaos is something interesting, something that a person that was described previously would be perfectly okay with, that is why they are prepared and even if they aren't prepared, they will quickly get a lay of the land and do their best to take care of themselves and everyone around them. This is what makes that person prepared, they are ready for anything and if they aren't ready, they will become ready the instant it becomes necessary.

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The Source

When we feel negative emotions what is our first thought? Better yet what are the thoughts following the first thought? Are we seeking to avoid? Or are we seeking for the source? This little exercise is very telling, because it shows you what your inclination is, and beyond that it shows you what your preference is. Are you a person that seeks the truth or simply seeks comfort? The one who seeks truth and is honest with themselves will begin to search for what the source of their pain is, even if it means they are entering darkness, even if it means a hard journey in front of them. This journey will most likely lead them into the unknown, a part of the universe not explored. This isn't the scariest part, the scariest part is the facing of the self, truly seeing all your demons - this is why we avoid seeking the source of pain, now pain could be sadness, it could be anger or anything under the sun; the simple answer is it pain = suffering.

Now let's assume we have begun to search for the source, we look within ourselves to see the truth, to see what really lies in the darkness, and what do we find? It could be anything from what we hide from others, or what we hide from ourselves. The next step seems stupidly simple but has the greatest impact, and that is being curious about what is there, being curious about what is happening and why it's happening. This means not judging what you are seeing, but watching it and exploring it. Exploring the properties of it, and more importantly is this really the source of the pain? Or is it simply a mask for heading why you are suffering? Now you may ask why would it be a mask? "I went searching for it, why would it continue to hide" or "why would I hide it from myself?", the simple answer is because then you have to deal with that suffering and deal with the fact you can't run away from it. So the better question becomes why wouldn't you hide it from yourself. It is a defense mechanism one used to protect your fragile sense of self, so it shouldn't be attacked but understood, and approached with kindness.

Now if you found the source, or what you believe is the source what can you do to solve it, if being curious isn't doing much. This is where things get tricky, every source is different, and that makes approaching them different for each scenario. The first thing that needs to be done is to understand it, understand where it is coming from and why it is arising, it could be there to protect you from getting hurt again. It could also be there to tell you that their is something wrong and you should look at it. You have to approach this problem with compassion because you created it, and if you approach yourself with a stick and try to beat it into submission it'll only lead it to shattering into hundreds of pieces and become ever harder to deal with it, the biggest thing it wants is to be heard. We all just want to be heard, and understood, the same applies for everything occurring within us.

Let's say we got to the point where we understand why the suffering is happening, and we understand that it is just trying to protect us. Then how do we get rid of it? Perhaps that is the issue, the whole wanting to get rid of - it is nearly impossible, this thing is apart of you, it might not be your favourite part, but it is a part. Wouldn't it be best to accept the part? Accepting the source of suffering? Then nurturing it into something sustainable - something healthy. Acceptance is what most people want, so why wouldn't this part want to be accepted? Consider it as if it is a child, if you reject it and try to push it away it'll simply throw a temper tantrum until you listen, now you might never listen, it'll fade so it's just white noise, but that doesn't mean you have solved things - if anything it'll stem into every single action of yours.

How do you nurture this part. this thing you didn't really want and that caused you so much suffering and pain? Ah that is also difficult no part of this process is easy, and it requires constant work, constant effort, constant care. So you begin by talking to it, when it flares up, give it your attention, listen tp understand, not to reply. Begin by consoling it, telling it, it isn't necessary to flare up, to lash out - that you are listening now, and perhaps even apologize for ignoring this part for so long. This might seem wishy-washy but consider this, is ths part you? Is this thing a part of you? Is it you? Shouldn't it then get an apology? Doesn't it deserve that much, for not being cared for?

This is the thing, who knows what the right answer is, but curiosity allows us to learn more about the situation, giving us time to figure out a solution. Curiosity allows us to enter hidden areas within us, because it is not limited by certainty.

Be curious and explore the depths of your spirit, even if it feels like shit. Look for the truth that lies beneath the surface. It is harder than it seems.

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Easy Words

It is easy to say a bunch of words to convey how smart you are, or want the world to believe you are but it much harder to embody your words. Consider meditation and the art of zen, lots of people speak about it as if they embody these ideas and topics, but most do not, it's simply an act. We type out words to our friends, the internet and our colleagues without thinking about if we believe these words, and if they are something we embody, or if they are simply words that allow us to pander to others. This brings us to a crossroads, are we saying the words because we wish to embody those words or are we saying them to pander to another, the distinction can be easy ignore but is vital to our own understanding of ourselves.

If we are attempting to embody the words we are saying, that means we wish to head in that direction and learning to speak using those words perhaps is vital to becoming it, or it may be a fatal attempt to engrain it within you. You may be tricking yourself into believing you have become it because you use the words so convincingly but have yet to even scratch the surface of it. This is where a delicate balance must be struck, because using the words you wish to embody helps you to constantly think and question that way of being, which in turn may prompt you to become that thing. In the end saying words or writing words becomes easy, it isn't the tell tale sign of actual hard work, of something tangible, it is more so just words on a page.

Consider this piece that is written or any piece of writing the author may or may not embody what they are saying, they may be trying to become that thing, or they may be just trying to portray themselves as such, but that doesn't take away from the truth of the writing; it should make you step back and say how true is this piece of writing? Why was it written and what is it actually trying to say, not what is written with words but what can be gleaned from it and what is its true essence.

When you are reading anything it's best not to compare yourself to the author and what they think because they may be learning how to think just like you are, they may be writing to gain a new perspective, so they are just like you - a student of learning, of curiosity.

Words are easy, so never put too much weight into them.

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Regression Is Progress

We continue through life in the hopes of progressing continuously, hopefully in a linear fashion without any plateau but that is where we fail in our way of thinking. We believe that progress is always forward and always going up, that if we stall out on a plateau or if our progress slows down in any fashion we are failing. Progress is more complicated than yes or no, it is a fluid state and fluid states fill the stages they are set in, moving about and finding the perfect balance. When we are progressing and going through something within life it becomes harder and harder to progress because we are getting closer to 100% (whatever that might be). If we are starting at 0% when learning how to meditate, the second we learn anything we have made a huge leap in our knowledge, it isn't linear and as we continue to learn we progress incrementally but we will come to a point where we aren't growing and this could happen for any number reasons including all the knowledge we have gained needing to be processed and ingrained into us.

Now let's say we feel ourselves regressing back to a previous state, that awareness of noticing that we are regressing means we have progressed and are progressing right this second. We wouldn't have been able to tell we were 'regressing' unless we had progressed so far that we would be able to tell that we are regressing and to actually catch ourselves while it is occurring. This regression allows us to witness our growth sometimes in the best manner, perhaps reigniting the flame of curiosity and of trying to make progress. Consider the stock market most of the time the price of any stock in the day to day does not go linearly up, it sometimes pulls back and then keeps going up or plateaus and then goes up; if we look at the stock market over a large enough time period it looks like it has been going up linearly the entire time. This is where perspective is important, when we are within the problem we carry around a particular perspective that does not allow us to see the full picture.

When we are regressing or even plateauing it is important to take a step back and breathe, before moving forward or even before moving backwards. That moment of pausing can allow you to turn things around, or head in a completely new direction.

Pause. Breathe. Move.

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What is Zen?

It is simple, it is only existing and experiencing the world without the reference frame of good and bad. It isn't a complex topic, it isn't something that can be learned or taught. Zen is something that simply exists and is experienced, it is beyond the words of man - this is where language fails us. Language can only get us so far in the topics of zen and living, which if done 'right' is one of the same, so what do you do when language fails?

Once language fails, you must begin to experience the world and learn from it, by way of curiosity. It is no longer about knowing but about existing and questioning the things that are happening - it isn't a race, nor a comparison game.

Zen is all around you, it is all existing around you, it is you. It can not be explained, it can not be written, it can only be experienced.

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What To Read?

After reading numerous books or perhaps just starting to read, the question 'what should I read? What is the best thing to read?'arises, this question either stalls us in our pursuit of knowledge or helps guide us to where we want to do, but how do we push towards the guide us and not the stalling us part?

It begins with asking the right questions, starting off with the general question of "why do I want to read?" then narrowing based on that, and finally when you have a book in front of you that you think you want to read, the question that you should ask yourself is "What is the purpose of this book? What am I hoping to gain from it?". Those questions will lead you to your answer of if the book is worth reading or not, if the book fails to captivate you or fails to provide information that you were hoping to gain then put the book down and find a different book.

The thing school never taught you is, is that you don't have to finish a book you don't like, if you hate a book or dislike it, put it down and pick up a different one - this is not an exam or being graded; it is for your own pursuit, whatever that may be. Another really cool thing about reading is you can just be wanting to read for fun, and that is just as good as reading to gain knowledge.

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From Gold To Dust

When we were all children we were covered in gold, before we even knew what the word gold was or what the color yellow was. We were happy, carefree, covered in gold, without a care in the world, but as time went on, as we engaged with our parents, with adults the gold that we were covered in started fading away and we started rusting, as the world covered us in dust and grim with their words, with their actions, with anything. We hit a split in the road and either think of ourselves as a god and above the world, covering ourselves with gold paint, or we turn into nothing, going into a depressive state where the world walks on us and we do nothing. These two splits can both lead to the same thing, which is the rebuilding of self, the grandiose path involves burning all that gold paint off, and the depressive state is a breaking of that state.

From gold we must turn to the dirt, to the dust and work, work on the minimal work, doing the tedious tasks and doing it with pride, as if it was all that existed in the world, gaining respect for washing the floors, gaining an understanding of what it means to work just to survive. Working on the mental, working on the spiritual, beginning afresh, starting from the ground and working your way up. Some believe they don't have the time to rebuild, they don't have the time to be covered in gold, so they'll rush around from one thing to the next quickly painting themselves gold, thinking that that is enough, all the while feeling empty.

This rebuilding can take many forms but it begins by rebuilding, by splitting from the path you know, by stopping the blame of your parents, your family, adults from when you were younger. It starts by taking responsibility and focusing on understanding others, and playing in the dirt, learning how to clean the floors. Most people don't realize they need to rebuild themselves and start taking responsibility until they are much older and when time becomes precious, but the time is made for it because the importance of that work is understood.

To be covered in gold is a gift, a gift that is freely given but hardly earned.

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A Failure Turned Into A Success

What do you do when all the pieces come tumbling down? What do you reach for? A bottle of wine or a piece of paper and a pen. What do you do when you feel as though everything is crumbling around you? This is the sign of who you are, when everything falls apart and breaks, what pieces do you reach for? These questions are worth repeating because they are essential to being to able to rebuild, and to grow beyond your fall from the high tower.

The things we reach out for help us either become more stable or weigh us down as we are falling, this difference in quality makes a world of difference in our wellbeing.

This was one of the worst posts ever written, it was not completed - why was it the worst? Simple, it was not prioritized, it was something left till the very end of the day, when all resources have been depleted and all effort drained. So whose fault is it? Who is responsible for this choice? To allow time to "slip" away and be stuck at the end of the night with an empty post that failed? You can blame everything from the weather to not drinking enough water, but it doesn't change anything. The fault lies with you, with me. Everything matters, and nothing matters, that is the complexity and duality of life, you must decide what you do, what you love and how you go about your day. Yes, things arise, but that can't be an excuse. Some days need to be lazy days where nothing of importance gets done, but you have the choice of getting some things done that are important to you, the things you promised yourself. Perhaps you only promised yourself to get out of bed and make it, good. Do that, it isn't much but some days things are hard, or perhaps your minimum is working out and meditating and if you can just accomplish that the rest of the day doesn't matter. Now the most important note has yet to be made, how much energy are you willing to dedicate to what is important to you? Is it something you just do for fun, or is it something that gives you the space to breathe and be alright no matter what the circumstance is. This matters because then you know how much energy to give it, and the thing with this, is that we never know how much energy something actually needs until we are in the situation when we gave it too little energy - this moment is fleeting though, as we tend to forget about the importance of a thing the second it is no longer thought of; make a note to your future-self with as much detail as possible so you will relive the experience and then allocate the right amount of resources to the task at hand.

This is where growth occurs, it is where we find our passions, it is where we know what is truly important. Then it is all in our hands, we have the choice what we do. Where we choose to allocate time, now you can't blame the world, you can't feign ignorance, because you are fully aware. - An idea: you have to corner yourself in order to fully understand yourself and get yourself to do something, because otherwise you will always search for an excuse.

Note: This post was not meant to go in this direction, but see that is the magic of possibilities(Check Out The Post on Possibilities & Certainty), if their was certainty about how this post was meant to be made then it would have failed and their wouldn't have been a new post for today. Keep going, explore. Be Curious.

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The Coming Of Death

Most stoics consider themselves immune to others deaths, as if they will be unaffected by it as death comes for all of us, it is apart of life so why be bothered by it? At least that is one of the things stoicism pushes, yet death is also an emotional thing, yes this emotional thing could be something that is ingrained in us by culture but that isn't the point of this piece. It comes in like a tidal wave, something that even if expected has an unexpected consequence, which is a numbing sensation and the thought of "this can't be real, I'll see him/her in a few weeks" or perhaps the numbing and thoughts are more akin to you having to face your own mortality, that you can't simply run away from death or that it won't come for you.

This is the struggle our egos go through, our minds struggle with the idea that we are like others, that we share this "burden" of mortality. Death can take anyone away from us, and we have no control over it. This is the part we dislike the most and it is because of the uncertainty and the fact we are just like everyone else, simply dust.

Here is a beautiful piece written by the Philosophor AI which is a project done by Murat Ayfer

Now as we discussed this topic of dying and death, we feel a certain discomfort in it, an uneasiness, it is something we wish to avoid, but doesn't that show that it is important to discuss? That this discomfort is something we will all face and one day we ourselves will die. To accept it and to allow it to occur is so important because then we can truly feel everything that is occurring.

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Limited Possibilities Of Certainty

This question and idea comes from The Tinkered Question, looking to get into the beta? Follow it on twitter The Tinkered Question. The question we will be exploring is "How can we stay open to possibilities when we expect certainty?"

When we go about our daily life and think about the future we like to be certain what will occur, we try to shimmy the odds into our favor so we can go about life without worrying about what might happen. This seeking of certainty is natural, as it's what we have been taught throughout school and throughout life that the unknown is dangerous, leading us to having this fear of taking a leap of faith - though many believe in religion, many don't believe in religion, yet both of those are leaps of faith. Now this addiction, this longing for certainty is meant to protect us, but what if it is only caging us in?

Being certain leads us down an intended path, with an intended outcome, the right outcome but that is the only thing that exists. This path is the only path you are looking for, it is the only path that can exist in your world, so what happens when you get flung off this path? Or better yet what happens when there is another possibility that has been missed, because of your need for certainty?

When we seek a certain outcome, all chances of a better outcome diminish, because you have declared them impossible or something that doesn't interest you. You can no longer expand beyond your thinking, shutting off any chances of growth whether negative or positive. You become static in your life, as you choke out the numerous possible outcomes that you could never plan for.

Begin with the end in mind, but do not fixate that, that is the only end, and this is the only path.

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The Regression Of Questions

Questions sometimes arise in a random fashion, but when they arrive they are nothing more than a surface thought, they hold no semblance of anything important but this is when they are the most important. This is when they can either lead to more questions, or lead to a simple shallow answer then the jumping to another thought, letting all other possibilities slip through the hands of time. The moment the first question arises you have touched the surface, now you can explore this question in a width wise fashion, ie exploring the surface of mars, or you can go for depth, allowing that initial question to the spot where you go deeper into the question. It begins by attempting to answer the initial question with a solid indepth answer, and as you are going about answering, you must look out for new questions that are arising because of that first question.

This is the regression of a question, allowing yourself to be lead down a rabbit hole of questions, providing you with new perspectives to better understand yourself and the world around you. It begins with that initial question, that first one can lead to a plethora of good questions and what we truly seek is incredible answers, that go beyond what you were initially looking for, and give you a piece of gold - this piece of gold can not be taken away from you because it was worked for, because it was earned.

Allow the first question that arises to guide you to future questions in exploration fo truth.

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When is it Honor?

How important is honor to you? How important is honor to your culture, or society? Is it even something you think about? These seem like unimportant questions but they are something to think about, something that leads us to think beyond what we normally consider. Most people who reach a certain aspect of thinking or a certain phase in their way of being try to honorable in their actions and their words because they realize they don't wish to have regret, but what if honor is getting in the way of self-improvement and growing as an individual, would that still be considered honorable? Would that still be the right action, the one that leads you to having the least amount of regret? Or is being dishonorable actually the only way to be honorable, as it allows you to continue down the path of self-improvement. Or is doing what is honorable always the method to doing right action and to improving oneself?

Perhaps this is where difference between pridefulness vs honor comes into play. What does it mean to honorable, honor comes from the latin word honos which means to do what is right, this doing what is 'right' is self guided, though it can also be placed into our minds by society as what is the right conduct that one must do. This is completely different than pride, pride is to take great pleasure or satisfaction for one's own achievements, it has nothing to do with what is right, but only for ones own greed and ethics. So doing something you believe is wrong in order to advance your self-growth would mean that it is done out of pride, or arrogance where as doing something that is difficult but important for your advancement in life would be honorable. Now here is the kicker, the true gem, can you be prideful about being honorable? This would mean you are being dishonorable with your pride about being honorable, thus tainting all the actions that were honorable. So the question then becomes is pride what is holding you back, pride about being honorable, as if it is some type of thing you can put in a trophy case to show the world, 'hey, I'm honorable, I'm better than you', is that what is occurring? If so then it was never honor, it was never truthfulness but the fact that you could tell the world "I am truthful, I am honorable". An honorable being would not tell the world they are honorable, they would simply be honorable, but a prideful person would tell the world they are honorable, or try to sneak it into conversations.

It is not honor that impedes us, but pride.

Note: Makes me think of the Gay Pride Parade, pride isn't a dangerous thing? As it is virtue signaling, stating 'because I take part of this parade, I am more liberal than you, I am better than you'. Isn't that taking away from what that movement was about when it started? When it started they wanted equality, they wanted justice.

Just some food for thought.

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Subjective Feelings

We feel so strongly, and we feel that our feelings and emotions hold weight that they are on our sides, yet we never question them so how do we know? We feel strongly then we tweet, we feel strongly and then we talk, yet we don't question what we are feeling or why we are feeling the emotions we are feeling. Are we getting charged up by a certain topic, and thus invalidating the other persons point without even considering the validity of their words? Are we simply believing that 'our' feelings are looking out for us, or meant to help us find the truth? We have the right to feel whatever we feel but nobody has respect those feelings that you are feeling, or walk on eggshells around them to protect you or even validate them.

Feelings and emotions arise from conditioning that has occurred throughout our lives and perhaps even what we have done to manifest certain feelings from certain triggers. We are also constantly being fed by media, people and the internet on how we should feel about every single topic; we are no longer allowed to discuss things and navigate to find our own path towards the truth. We are being shown a situation and being told how to feel about the situation and even what to say when you see that situation unfold. Now this goes back to feelings, just because you feel a certain way does not make the world be that way, you must question why you are feeling a certain why and where it comes from - not just saying this is how I feel, therefore it is how the world is, and what the truth is. The truth is more nuanced than that, and we lack the information and objectiveness to fully comprehend the truth. We are simply painting everything with the same broad brush in the hopes that the majority of the thing is that color, yet we really have no idea - we simply have a feeling.

Is this to say feelings are a lie and shouldn't even be considered? Not at all, feelings are important they provide some guidance and bring life into the thoughts that occur within the mind, they also help us understand ourselves and the world better but only when explored with curiosity. Just because you feel an emotion does not make it true, it simply means you must explore it and figure out the truth yourself. Consider it an indicter to direct your attention.

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The Empty Coffers

We rush to tell everyone everything, we rush to tell the world what we are doing and tell them everything going on with us but we never keep anything for ourselves. We continuously expose ourselves to everyone we meet, some more than others to the point that nothing is precious, giving away all the mystery of ourselves, sharing every little detail no matter how insignificant or how cherised something is. We give it away to whomever will take it, devaluing everything we are and can be. We end up being but a husk of our former selves. We gain nothing, we are nothing.

The counterpoint is sharing is a good thing, it gets people involved and gets people invested in you, so isn't that a good? Sharing something can be coming out of a place of vulnerability but if you share everything it is no longer about vulnerability, it is simply your never ending need for attention (this isn't fully accurate, and it gets very complicated). But shouldn't there be hidden treasures within you that are unlocked over time, seeds that are being watered in a room filled with sunshine, or perhaps a room filled with darkness, yet things still grow. Instead we just hand over the seeds of something that is precious because we want attention, we want to be cared for; the issue arises when we stop caring for those seeds ourselves. We leave them for others, allowing them to lose all value. We do this continuously, leaving us with no seeds, no fruits, no anything - just empty. The coffers that used to be filled with secrets and seeds when we were children have been emptied out and all but disappeared. We hold nothing of value, we simply exist only as gathers but not as protectors.

We are taught to keep spilling our guts to everyone, from our emotions to our thoughts to our dreams and even as far as things we find on the internet. We never seem to keep anything for ourselves, we never say to ourselves, perhaps this is only for me, we try to include others. This act of inclusion, is also complicated in itself, isn't a bad act, but it can negative consequences, because leave ourselves with nothing to care for, and thus we become aimless, we live without a purpose always reaching out to others to find a purpose.

Nobody in this entire world from the Dali Lama to Jesus to your mom can fill your coffers up, nobody can give you the seeds or grow them for you - can they help? Sure, but the majority of the work is yours and yours alone. That is the burden you must carry yourself. Some of us spend years and years trying to fill ourselves up, but we continuously search outside of ourselves to do this, and that will never work.

Hold somethings for yourself, keep something precious just for you, and no not porn or any other bullshit but something you find precious, perhaps it is an article that touched your heart, or a thought that needs to be cultivated or an idea you had while showering. Grow something, then share the fruits of your labour, NOT THE SEEDS, but the fruits.

Note: This idea, this thinking was inspired by the book "Iron John: A Book About Men" by Robert Bly

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How To Be Extremely Productive

The answer may be simpler than you might think, force yourself not to have any other choice but to be productive. begin by taking away all other options to be unproductive and to be unfocused. The more options you take away from yourself the higher the likelihood that you will be productive. Now your mind will attempt to find other ways to be unproductive but as you take away more things you increase the likelihood of productivity.

It's simply taking small pieces away until you are left with productivity, until then your mind will rush to various things as possible solutions to not be productive. A supplementary thing would be meditation, to help with your concentration or ability to focus for longer periods of time. If you think you can't meditate then sit in front of a blank wall for 10/20/40/60/90 minutes and just stare at it; focusing only on the wall. All you are trying to do is increase your minds ability to focus.

Note: My brain is fried, and this is the best you are going to get today. Notice I could have stopped at any moment, and said eh not today, maybe tomorrow but then I would have skipped a day, thus leading to many skipped days. Showing up is more than half the battle.

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The things we do to escape are almost limitless, we want to avoid something at all costs. This something differs between individuals but all of us have something that we are trying to escape. So we go out in search of escaping, some flock to alcohol or drugs, some flock to videogames others may flock to TV, and yes this includes youtube series. Almost everyone is trying to escape from a certain aspect of reality that they do not wish to face. This also has a range of possibilities some of us are scared of our emotions, some of us are scared of our minds, some of us are scared of being successful, some of us are scared of failing, but all these things have one thing in common, it is the fear of the unknown. We are scared of pushing past these things and actually doing them because we have no idea who we will be on the other side of it, how things will change and what impact that will have on our day to day lives.

So instead of facing our fears, we choose to escape into any medium we can, all to run away from the feeling of being scared. We will always changing yet we fear changing? That implies that we are always fearful. Once we break the cycle of escapism, we quickly end up facing what we were trying to avoid (this is of course unless you find another thing to escape into), we may be successful, we may be unsuccessful but it doesn't really matter. What really did matter is the fact that their was an attempt, that the escapism stopped for a moment, perhaps even longer than a moment. You have finally grasped a piece of reality that didn't exist for you before.

Taking even one step away from escapism makes the biggest difference in the world; you are one step closer to touching the fabric of reality.

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Lack Of Action

How many of us think about doing all these cool things and learning how to do more than what we do currently? How many of us even attempt to do those things? Maybe it is learning a second language, or maybe a side project we are looking to get into or if we want to go even smaller maybe it is simply organizing your home. None of these things are hard, but they all require effort and changing of your current habits and behaviour. Since we have this hurdle that we need to overcome, we simply don't put in enough energy to overcome the hurdle like in chemistry a reaction won't occur until it has enough activation energy.

This activation energy is what gets the ball moving, and what allows us to overcome the initial friction we feel when start or want to start a new project. Now the question really becomes how do we get this activation energy, this initial push to start working on things. The answer is simpler than one would prefer. Make sure their isn't any other option or any other choice, this will force you to do something productive or work on your new project. It'll push you one step closer to it, that is decreasing the activation energy needed. This could take the form of removing videogames from your life, or removing youtube from your life, or whatever your vice is, maybe it is alcohol? It doesn't matter what it is, but what is important is removing all other options until you do the thing you must do. Now some might say they 'can't' do that, but that is simply an excuse, what will happen if you do it? Will you die? If yes then you are right you shouldn't do it, if it causes you discomfort because it is a habit of yours then that is something that must be done lest you wish to remain the same for the rest of your existence.

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The Right Action

How do you know when you are doing the right thing, or better yet how do you know if the direction you are heading in is the right direction? What if grinding 12 hours a day to achieve your "dream" isn't the right call, and maybe you should have spent 4 hours at the beach reading and enjoying the waves. How do you know? The truthful answer is you don't know, you don't know what the right action is. You don't even know if you should say 7 words to make a person fall with you. You'll never know if the choices you make were right.

Let's say you make a choice, doesn't matter what but you make one, the first month of that choice you realize you messed up, and try to change that choice but then 6 months later it dawns you that you actually made the best choice possible. Then 50 years later you think about that random decision you made and it hits you that it was the worst mistake you ever made, as time passes you think of it less and less. Laying on your death bed you begin to think back on all your decisions, all your actions and realize they were all perfect in the circumstance that they were made in, smiling to yourself you pass away.

None of the actions matter all that much because in the moment you are making the best possible call you can, and at all points you do not know what the future holds. How can you blame a past version of yourself for not taking the 'right action', when you can't tell what the weather is going to be like tomorrow?

The right action is simply the action that was taken. It may not be the one you are most happy with, it might be the decision you regret but it was the right action when it occurred.


What about the actions that you thought about before doing them and knew they were the wrong choice when you did them? Alas that was something you had full awareness of and chose to ignore, so it wasn't the right action. This idea of the action that was taken, is always the right action does not give you or anyone the right to use it as an escape goat.

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As we go through life we have certain beliefs that we carry forward with a tight grip because without them we will be lost in the fog of confusion. We are never looking to question our beliefs but we are always looking for more beliefs to pack on top of our current beliefs, and where do we look? We scower books, podcasts and Joe Rogan's Podcast of course. Now if we come across something that goes against our current beliefs, we react negatively towards the person that said the belief, or just the belief in general, never entertaining the belief or questioning your own. Now some of us (myself included) when we see a new belief that counters a previously held belief jump to the new belief like a moth to a flame; with a continuous gnawing feeling that perhaps we are wrong, perhaps this isn't the belief. So we flip flop between beliefs, never really asking why or which one is more accurate to your current experience and your past experiences.

What is really happening when we encounter a new belief that is different than the one we hold is that we have approached a crossroad, where the beliefs are competing for your attention, competing for space in your mind. How do you allocate this precious space in your mind? Do you randomly just give it away to whatever new belief suits your fancy? or whatever old belief helps you cope with the world? Or do you question the beliefs, do you wonder around this crossroad to see which one aligns with the truth as you see it (notice I did not say "as you know it") - after questioning them both for validity. The funny thing about beliefs is that they are not black and white, but shades of grey and if you look even closer shades of every color. When you arrive at the crossroad two paths lay before you, nice brick paths that make traveling quite easy but they are predetermined already shapen and already have a direction. Yet they aren't the way you want to go, perhaps both of them together lead you in the direction you want to go; what do you do? The simple answer answer is create your own path, take the two beliefs mix them together and see if that is something that is an acceptable answer to your questions. Now the tricky part is you don't know the amount of each belief that is needed to truly answer your question, at least not without effort. This is where the best answers lie, in the exploration of both beliefs and creating your own, not something that is hand fed to you, but something you carve out for yourself. A new path, one that has not been trampled on by thousands.

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Do you want to be successful?

Do you actually want to be successful? Or are you just saying you want to be successful, because you think that is the right thing to want? These are fundamental questions that very few people ask themselves, they chase a goal or an ambition unsure why they aren't successful, and wondering why they aren't winning but haven't taken the time to ask themselves "Do I want to be successful?", whatever that means to them. Perhaps they are scared of being successful because in their minds they don't know what it means to be successful or how it will change their life. So as life goes on once they begin to experience a little bit of success they begin to shoot themselves in the foot, perhaps not on purpose, but they do. You do. Most people do.

We get stuck in the mindset that we know, and refuse to acknowledge that life can be better, that we do deserve to be successful because we worked for it, because we attempt to work at it. This is the biggest block within us, our mentality towards being successful, towards being happy. The biggest obstacle isn't your boss or your parents or your skin color, it is what you believe you deserve. Now society has helped instill those beliefs into you, but right now you have a choice. Which direction do you want to go in? What questions will you ask yourself?

So do you want to be successful?

*Note: You can stop reading, because that was a great ending, but I shall continue to write because I have more thoughts on this.

This idea of shooting yourself in the foot arises from you believing you don't deserve to be successful or happy, it stems from something in you that is broken or simply has been blocked. You need to search within to find the truth, the answers that hide from you. The biggest thing is when you start gaining some successful looking for little signs of self-sabotage, then realigning yourself to face in the direction you want to go in. Now would it help to have a definition of success? Yes it would, but is it necessary? Not really, because it is a learning process, your definition will shift as you gain more experiences in life, so the important thing is asking the questions, and searching for a meaningful answer. That will help you figure out everything in this universe.

Gentle curiosity.

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Chasing The Tail

We believe we have to chase the thing we told ourselves we want for our entire lives, we think that is the only way, the only path we have, yet we really have no idea if that is the truth or not. The issue if staying true to your past self is that person doesn't exist anymore. There are 3 versions of you, the past self (the one who read that last sentence), the present self (the one reading this word right now), and the future self (the one who finished this paragraph), the past self had ideas and beliefs that were true, but now they mean very little because the past self is in the past, and only the memories of the past self exist in the present, so now present you is making decisions for future you based on old information, based on past you, who if you look back was a fool. Every year or every few years when we look back at our past selves, we typically feel this sense of foolishness, or childishness towards them, perhaps because they were so wrong about an idea or concept. Now why would you, you in the present trust and continue to follow past you? The one you believe to be a fool, the one who lacked all this knowledge that present you has? This isn't to say past you was wrong about the path you are walking on, but did you even reevaluate the path in the present? Did you think about why you are still walking it?

We continue to chase our own tails, thinking we are moving forward but we may not be moving forward, because we are following the advice of someone who was perhaps wrong about lactose intolerant or wrong about a relationship they were in, and now you can see all the red flags. The past you did the best they could with what they knew, so shouldn't present you do the best they can to make the right choice without being beholden to a self that no longer exists?

This is important especially when chasing your dreams or your goals, as time goes on circumstances change, so why wouldn't you change with them? Why are you forcing yourself and feeling like shit for trying to want what past you wanted? You are forgetting to honor yourself when you do this, when you continue to chase the tail.

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The Excuse Of Laziness

The greatest excuse mind has ever come up with is that 'I'm feeling lazy' or 'I'm lazy' it resolves everything, doesn't it? You are no longer responsible for doing anything, your dreams, your goals, you have dissolved any possibility of you accomplishing what you 'want' to do. It is that simple, 'I'm feeling lazy' or better yet 'I don't feel like it right now' - the question becomes when will you ever feel like it? This excuse of being lazy is one that stops you from doing anything, it stops you from even attempting the task at hand. The more one thinks about the word 'lazy' the more one realizes how much of a crutch it really is. The truth of the matter is, you aren't lazy, you simply don't want it. That is the harsh truth of the matter, you simply don't want it. Your words may say you want it, but they are just for show, you don't want it at all. You're a coward, that is it. If you are thinking of using the excuse 'I'm feeling lazy' or 'tired' but wish to remain honest with yourself you must change your words to say 'I just don't care about it' or 'I don't want to do it', then your mind will scream in protest that, that isn't the reason why you aren't doing it - but you will know it is.

Laziness and being tired are one in the same, yet you can be tired, you could have had a long day, but the attempt you make to show up is what counts. The attempt that is made to show up and try to accomplish what you want matters the most. This goes back to the topic "It's Easy", everything is about keeping small promises with yourself, to build up a strength within yourself for when you think you are feeling tired and feeling lazy. Now of course you may not want the thing that badly, and that is perfectly okay, the key is to admit that, to admit the truth is to free yourself of the burden of lying to yourself.

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Guilt Tripping Part 2

We have gone over guilt tripping and what it is and how it works, and how to solve it but that wasn't everything. It is important we explore every aspect of guilt tripping because it occurs so frequently.

When we are being guilt tripped sometimes we allow it occur simply because we wanted to be liked or we don't want to disappoint the other person or in other cases we think it is the right thing to do, but what does all this really say about us? What does us scumming to the guilt trip say about us and our own self-worth? Let's say your assumption is right, if you don't go along with the other person they won't like you, or they will be disappointed, that says a lot more about them than it does about you. They wish for you to follow their selfish desires, whereas they are asking you to forgo your desires and your wishes for whatever they want. Does that sound like they care about you? Does that sound like they want the best for you? The best course possible solution is them leaving your life(not always, but sometimes), but you would disagree. Now let's name an imaginary friend Sarah, you always see Sarah getting guilt tripped by her friend Ben after awhile what would you say to Sarah? Wouldn't you tell her not to put up with being used? Wouldn't you point out everything previously stated? Yet none of this applies to you? This goes back to caring for yourself as if you were a baby, you treat yourself like you are above the world, that these things are beneath you. You won't fall for guilt tripping, you can say no, you are a good person. How does being another's foot stool make you a good person?

Here we come across the idea of a good person, agreeing with another doesn't make you a good person, following along when you don't want to do something doesn't make you a good person. Doing what is right makes you a good person, and yes sometimes that involves doing what you don't want to do, but those are the reasons why you may be a good person. You aren't a good person if you don't take care of yourself, because then you project (gosh I hate that word) your pains onto others, you stop yourself from truly being able to help anyone because you are half assing everything.

Become stronger, work on building up the ability to say no, to not be guilt tripped and to continue on your path. This choice, will either make your relationship with this other person stronger, or make it shatter as glass does when reaching absolute zero.

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Guilt Tripping

The greatest art form that can lead a gentle soul astray is when another attempts to guilt trip them. Guilt tripping is when you play at another persons emotions, to make them feel bad, in order to get them to do what you want, now you might think nobody would do that on purpose and some degree you are right. Most people who guilt trip others have perfected the art form and don't have the awareness to know that they are doing it to another, they simply do it whenever they are not getting their way. It is simply a reaction of their subconscious, does this dissolve them of any blame? Not at all, but it does force you to take responsibility for their actions, not in a bad way but a good way. The belief that simply saying no, and believing you have the will power to stick with that initial no is enough but it isn't close to enough. A person who is attempting to guilt trip won't take a simple no for an answer (this is also where the idea of you caving in makes you weak, makes you vulnerable to others.).

What can you do? Now you can confront them about their actions, but what if they are unaware of them? The first thing you should do once you have said no and have decided to not give into their demands is remove yourself from the situation because your will is weaker than you want to believe it is (sorry to break the news). The second you remove yourself from the situation they can no longer guilt trip you into doing what they want you to do. This is of course like anything else is easier said than done, but it most be done in order to grow stronger. Once you have grown comfortable with saying no and refusing to be guilt tripped, then it might be a good idea to confront the person about it. Creating this will, the ability to say no and to walk is crucial for any endeavor or relationship, otherwise you can get taken advantage of.

This balance of saying no/walking away and being kind is a very hard balance to strike, to jump to the opposite of what you are is foolish because then you become what you really did not want to become. Now there is something marvelous about being foolish, fools can live and die freely thus allowing them to learn and find the balance a lot quicker. This is the double edged sword of course, like most great and foolish things.

It is reasonable for you to feel like if you don't cave, if you do walk away or do anything to go against the person guilt tripping you, that you will lose them. If this person can't respect you saying no and walking away, do you really have a relationship (this includes friendships as well as every other type of relationship)? Doesn't that make what you have with this other person a prison? One where you aren't respected, nor treated with any kind of kindness or care? Why would you put yourself through that; allowing yourself to be guilt tripped over and over again, not noticing or simply ignoring the fact that it is happening. The best excuse is 'I could have said no if I really wanted to' - nah bitch you couldn't. This is a form of self abuse, one where you don't value yourself at all.

Become stronger, work on building up the ability to say no, to not be guilt tripped and to continue on your path. This choice, will either make your relationship with this other person stronger, or make it shatter as glass does when reaching absolute zero.

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It's Easy

It is easy to talk about doing something, it is easy to plan to do something and it is even easy to write about doing something, but the scarriest one of all is, it is easy to know what to do, yet not do it. It is easy to know to eat healthy, another thing to actually be able to do it. That is the thing that we as people seem to forget. We forget that just because we know something does not mean we follow through with that knowledge, so when someone says something to you that you already 'know', it isn't a bad thing, if anything it is a reminder that you may know the thing but you do not have it engrained in your life. We seem to know a lot of things, and a lot of things are easy, take for example meditation, it is the easiest thing in the universe, all you have to do is sit and just watch your thoughts, how simple? Yet most of us don't have a daily meditation practice, we can't even sit for longer than 25 minutes, but the task is easy. Or how about going through a digital course that you paid for, it is easy in the sense you just have to take out 1 or 2 hours of your day to sit and listen to the video, maybe take some notes yet we avoid it. Easy, right?

That is the thing easy things are never easy, they are typically very difficult things to get a hold of, this could be because we assume they are easy and thus do not dedicate time and energy to them. We simply assume we will do them, because we made them out to be easy. Consider the previous post, "Training", showing up is easy yet we fail to do it, why? isn't that the question we are left with, if these things which are easy why can't we do them consistently?

This brings up the idea of mental toughness and mental resilience, Andy Frisella has an incredible podcast episode on it and how to increase mental toughness and mental resilience. This is where most of us lack, we lack the mental fortitude to keep going, to tackle the easy tasks and the hard tasks because we said we would do it. We are soft, and allow ourselves to live a poor life because we never built up discipline, we didn't build up mental fortitude, Jocko Wilink has a great book on that called "Discipline Equals Freedom: Field Manual" where he talks about the thinking beyond mental toughness and why it is important then goes into the actions that one can take to build up discipline. Read those or listen to those to get a better idea of mental toughness and how to build it, or continue reading.

Let's break this down into micro processes that we can follow to improve ourselves and accomplish the things we consider 'easy', the first thing would be pick one habit or one thing that you think is easy and make a promise to yourself to keep doing that everyday. It could be as simple as making your bed, but the key is to pick something small and easily manageable because then you are building trust within yourself, you are making yourself a person of their word. If you fail to keep the promise, simply restart until you are keeping that little promise to yourself everyday, then build on that, pick something that is a little harder and keep a promise to yourself about that. Build the habit of trust with yourself, and thus you will be building discipline as well. This would be the simplist manner to go about these things, though a great amount of patience is required.

Now if you are the average person, you want to tackle something big and massive not in a year but today, not today but now. This simply is the root of failure, you don't give a baby a chief's knife, so why would you give yourself a blowtorch? We must treat ourselves as if we are babies and slowly ease ourselves into greatness, not plunge ourselves out of our element (as I write this, I feel my mentality saying 'yes, but I'm different, I can do it. No fool, you can not. The past has proven that time and time again.) as that would lead us to failure and then to giving up.

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It is all just training, everything, ranging from drinking alcohol to working out and of course to writing - it is all something that is building up or perhaps it is fading away, all depends on what your actions are doing. Now let us focus on the positive attributes of the idea of everything is training. The thing we forget when trying to achieve something (doesn't matter what it is ) is that all we need to do is show up, show up every single time, it could be 3 times a week to go to the gym, or it could be meditating everyday. The key is to simply show up and do your best, now another key aspect is that doing your best varies from day to day, from moment to moment, some days your best will be beyond belief, other days your best will be simply going through the motions, perhaps because your heart hurts, or your body feels completely wrecked. Simply showing up and trying the best you can for that day is what matters, this doesn't exonerate one from not trying to push up and against resistance but it does allow you to not hate yourself when you fail to achieve the results of the previous day.

Showing up to work on your craft, anything can be your craft, is the most important thing, working on it daily or on a schedule is so important and it is so easily overlooked or it is ignored or simply avoided because guess what - IT IS FUCKEN HARD. Simply showing up is hard work, it is easy in concept, but is the hardest part of doing anything. Showing up is where greatness starts, where it arises. Alas there is no shortcut, no secret to becoming better. It comes down to training, over and over again, similar to the manner in a which a river carved out the grand canyon, the repitiation of the right action becomes engraved into your spirit and into your bones. That all begins with showing up.

This. This writing that is written, is all about showing up, perhaps an idea has occurred, perhaps nothing is within the mind, but just showing up and writing for 20 minutes is all that is needed. Now there hasn't been a post within the last two weeks, why? Simple, the resistance kept building up, and the avoidance kept growing and the avoiding increased the amount of resistance that exists, and thus it becomes a positive feedback loop, one in which you can be fully aware is occurring and still have it keep happening. The second you show up, it begins anew, the resistance recedes a little bit and you have the chance to breathe, now continue to show up and you'll have a beautiful beach as the resistance disappears.

The resistance will be back the second you stop showing up, it'll begin to build extremely aggressively because you gave it space to expand, you had it pushed back so far, now it'll want all that area back. Show up. Train.

Show up. Train. Work on your craft.

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The Erosion Of Time

Everything fades with time, from memories to skills to pain, it all fades away as time passes. This leads to us getting worse at things over time if we do not use those things. Things meaning skills, talents, memories and habits. Time corrodes and erodes everything that is not in use, but it also sharpens everything in use; this includes positive and negative things. This is erosion is only noticed when we attempt to return to a task that we were previously a master in, we find ourselves fumbling and struggling a bit, but the key word is erodes meaning to get back to that sharpened state takes less time than the first time you were sharpened. So the real question is to consider how can we keep the skills and habits we want sharp.

Consistency. The act of doing something starts to sharpen it, and consistency in doing the 'thing' keeps it sharp as well as continuing to sharpen it. Consistency is a hard thing to be consistent at (hahahhaa ;)) but it is the only thing that protects against the aging of time. Imagine a saddle that is simply sitting in a garage, not cared for but not used either, it becomes dry and brittle forming cracks along its surface because it has dried out, now perhaps that is a far fetched example, what about a knife? A knife that is used is being used does get dulled, but it is also being sharpened because it must be sharpened, where as a knife that is laying around will get dull as time goes on, never being sharpened or taken care of because it is tossed aside. The rule of consistency in action applies to writing as well, even a few days of not writing dulls a novice's ability, where as a master writer can go weeks or months without writing (Fun fact, they would never do such a thing because they became sharpened by writing all the time, and want to remain as sharp as possible) and still be sharp.

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Tools Of The Trade

The tools of your trade, of your craft make a world of difference but how much thought has been placed in the tools you are using? Did you simply pick the cheapest option because that is all you could afford when you started your craft? Or did you simply pick at random thinking nothing of the various options available for each single tool in your toolkit? Now most consider the tools they use nothing more than objects, but the tools of ones craft define the craft itself. They impact the quality of the tasks done, but more importantly they impact the quality of your life.

Consider using a dull knife, it never cuts properly and most likely will lead to you cutting yourself, whereas when you have a quality chef's knife it will slice through things like butter thus allowing you not to fight with the food you are trying to slice - though with a quality knife you must take care of it in a manner that will retain it's quality. Now if you are a programmer, you may think 'ah I have an extremely powerful computer, I have the best tools', but what about the keyboard you are using? What about the mouse? More importantly what about the chair, the one you are sitting in for hours? All these things impact the quality of your life, and comfort while completing a task.

The tools of the trade make the trade, looking into the best tools for your craft is the only way you can improve your performance and life; when beginning one must start with the worst tools, or the tools that aren't ideal, but as one progresses in their craft(A craft being anything one does, from a hobby to a profession) they should be upgrading their tools to meet their needs and improve their quality of life while doing the task at hand.

These are simple measures, but they make a world of difference.

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The Right Choice

We debate over choices all the time, trying to ensure that we do not make the 'wrong' choice, but when it comes to the hard decisions, the ones that impact our lives the most, we have a gut feeling of what we want to do. This gut feeling doesn't mean it is more right or wrong than the other choices, but it is typically the choice that we are most wanting and that means that is the direction one needs to head in. Now just because you are aware of what choice you want or what the right decision is, does not mean that you will go with that decision. Their is a tug of war inside of most, where two choices are pulling at one another, even when we want one choice to win we still put some money on the other choice as well. We don't want to be wrong, and we are afraid of forging our own path, a path where we can not blame another.

Choices are rarely as complicated as we tend to make them, but if we allow ourselves to see that the choices are simple we would feel foolish not to make that choice. We would feel childish. When do we make the choice we 'know' is the right choice?

The simple answer is we don't until it is time, until something clicks inside of us that makes us think 'ah yes', and typically it turns into a spur of the moment type of decision or action. All that thinking, and all that switching back and forth from choice to choice disappears, and you just pick one. Something clicked, and the reason why it may have clicked is possibly beyond understanding, but something clicked and then action was taken - perhaps you have begun to create a story to justify the actions you took, the reason why you decided what you did. Though the answer is simple, the resistance gave way, something clicked and you went with it - for better or for worse.

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Words & The Spells They Cast

Some say that magic doesn't exist in this world anymore, but if you pay listen really closely you can hear the magic in the air, in the texts, it's everywhere once you begin to pay attention to it. The magic that exists now, exists in the words that people use, in the words you use, that is where the spells are being cast. The definition of a spell is "a form of words used as a magical charm or incantation."Now when we speak words into existence we are forming a magical incantation because something is occurring because of the words we used, this something can be good or bad.

The words we use and the words we hear greatly impact the way we view the world and the way we view ourselves. Think about the words you tell yourself, or the words you tell others - how many lies do you tell? How many complaints do you have? What words do you use when you make a mistake? What words do you use when another makes a mistake? All these words that are thought or that are said are spells being put out into the world. Now think about magic, think about how it can cause such drastic effects in someone; the same thing is happening when you say words in this world, shooting off spells without thinking about the consequences of the words you are saying. Reckless.

If we flip all the negative words, or the harshness of them we won't be releasing spells of darkness at others or ourselves. This will greatly impact ones quality of life because their isn't a self made shadow hanging over every thought and every action, instead it will be more harmonize.

Be careful of the wizard you are becoming.

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The Growth Of Compassion

The world speaks about growing compassion to better understand others and to live a better life, yet it is never discussed on how to become more compassionate, though it is simple - one just does it, but we as people like to intellectualize everything to the point of losing ourselves in it. So let us assume it is pointless to think about compassion in a "smart" manner; it would be better to try to figure out how to cultivate it in our daily life, without trying to dilute it into something more than it is. Or better yet let's figure out what compassion is, primarily because it is important to know what it is before figuring out how to grow it in our lives. (If you are paying attention, we are currently intellectualizing it right now. Isn't that what we were trying to avoid?)

Compassion by Google's definition "sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others" we can also apply this to ourselves as well. So if we are compassionate to ourselves and the world wouldn't we become less angry, less frustrated, and simply experience less negative emotions - because instead of being self serving or just viewing things as unidiminsional, we begin to see the pains and suffering of others and can empathize with them (not pity). This seems like a good thing right? So let's assume we wish to cultivate it within our daily lives, toward ourselves when we make mistakes, or fall pray to our vices, as well as towards others.

Hahaha doesn't that seem logical - something that would help us in our lives?

Cultivating compassion, such a wild concept to cultivate. Is it more of a mental thing ie something that one needs to think about in order to cultivate or is it more of a 'eh it just happens'? So where does it begin, let's pull this apart into two different paths, one taking the mental thinking approach, and the other a more laxed and chill approach to put it simply.

1. Someone cuts us off in traffic, we can go through the mental process of realizing 'ah, look at that judgement, I wonder what that person is trying to rush to? Maybe they had a really bad day.' Then beginning to contemplate how you would feel in that position, to think about if you are the person doing the cutting off and why you would do that. This is a more intellectual way of going about it.

2. Simply living life, and thinking about compassion and everything it means to be compassionate then allowing your 'sleeping mind' to connect the dots behind the scenes. This method is different, because it involves letting go of the attachment of the result we seek which is to be more compassionate.

Now this makes things interesting, because their are two different approaches in front of us, both have their merits, now each path isn't wrong but their is one we are comfortable with. So isn't the answer simple? Or perhaps it is more complicated than what will be stated. Both. The answer is both. Now that could be a cough out but it honestly isn't. Consider this it begins as something intellectualized because we don't know how to do anything beyond that, we don't understand how to break through the thinking towards a more fluid path. So beginning in thinking isn't bad, but staying within it is - because now you are going against the grain of the world. One must progress beyond thinking into simply being, and that takes time and effort to move into. So being able to let go is an important feat that many lack, not because they can not do it, but because they value their minds too much (hahahaha because of the belief that we are our thoughts). This does bring up the idea of spells, alas for another day.

Note: When I wrote this post, and when I try to write any post, it is going through my entire process of thinking, to get to the conclusion. You are seeing my decisions as I am thinking, and coming up with my conclusions. This is important to note because I think it makes the post more useful in terms of understanding how things ended up the way they did.

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Getting In Your Own Way

Imagine a world where we didn't get in our own way when doing anything, imagine if we took care of ourselves like we take care of others or better yet the way we take care of beloved pets. Imagine if we forgave ourselves like we did pets, when they make a mistake - knowing full well they didn't know any better, but couldn't the same be said for us? We are our own greatest vice, we stop ourselves from growing beyond the current norm we are holding onto, yet we know it isn't good for us. We continuously get in our own way, and then wonder how we ended up in the spot that we are in. Hahaha isn't that the thing? We shoot ourselves in the foot before we even get started in the endeavors we are wanting to pursue, yet if another shot us in the foot we would be outraged.

This whole getting in your own way is something can be the underpinning of your entire life, and if it isn't examined and dealt with how can you go beyond it and truly reach the places where you want to go? The simple answer is you can't. Let's say you gained the awareness that you are shooting yourself in the foot before you start, how do you stop it? While it all begins with the smallest of actions, like all good things, you must stop shooting yourself in the foot over the little things. Do you want to get 'healthy' yet continuously self-sabotage? Then simply acknowledge 'ah I just ate chocolate cake', and restart immediately. This will keep what little momentum you have left, working for you instead of against you. Another thing is wait 10 minutes to do what you want to do - want to play video games? Wait 10 minutes and continue to work on what you were doing, then if that urge continues past 10 minutes then give yourself permission (this idea came from Nir check him out at This gives your brain time to letgo of the urge you are feeling, without solely relying on willpower. Setup a 10 minute timer on your phone, and continue to work at the end of the timer if you still feel the urge to play videogames, or eat that cake then go ahead but in Nir's book "Indistractable" he mentions how the urge typically disappears within the first 2 to 3 minutes.

It takes patience and practice to stop getting in your own way, and that is something that needs to be worked at. It can be worked on simple day to day things and doesn't have to be worked on a massive habit or task.

It all begins now.

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Silence is one of the most terrifying things in the world because the existence of self must be faced, because when their is only silence you can not hide from yourself behind the noise of the world and the distractions that arise from that. We must face ourselves in silence, or perhaps we will choose to sink into the thoughts that occurring - sinking into the daydreams that we mention we dislike yet we allow to run wild without any attempt to diminish them or to let them go. Is that silence though? Or is that still sitting in noise? Silence would be something where distractions are not running rampant - it is where one goes to face themselves; the calm within the storm.

When we do anything, or when we do "nothing" we have the tendency to always be listening to something, to always be absorbing some sound or a thought to get away from the internal noise that we dislike - as it was put a long time ago, to get away from the demons inside. This action of running away from the silence, from running away from yourself, is such a futile one, leading to massive insecurity and avoidance, which leaks into all facets of ones life. That is the issue from running away from silence. Does this mean you can not enjoy music, or a podcast? Not at all, but it does mean you should be mindful about the actions you are partaking in. Was it a decision to listen to music? Or a habit? Was it a decision to listen to something? Or a habit.

Know thy vices.

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Accountability & Checklists

Checklists enforce order, they enforce the idea of this needs to get done, not simply done but done in this order. Whereas schedules can be daunting in the manner where time simply evaporates, checklists state these things must get done in this particular order. It forces accountability not because another is holding you accountable but you are holding yourself accountable. Creating the checklist is the easy part, then keeping it within eyesight at all times during the time period it is needed in is the hard part. When the checklist is within eyesight, it is constantly nagging at the mind, that this needs to be completed. It assists in building willpower which is extremely limited and it helps breakdown resistance which plagues the world.

Now the question becomes what is a checklist? A checklist is simply a reinforced routine, it is a reminder of a routine - now most people make the assumption that they can remember all their good habits they are trying to cultivate and remember their entire routine, but why dedicate resources to remembering? Why put yourself at a disadvantage before you even start? This brings upon the topic of getting in your own way, alas that is for another day.

The question becomes do you want to actually help yourself, or do you simply want to trick yourself into believing you want to help yourself and the world is simply conspiring against you.

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The Building Up Of Resistance

Whenever we wish to do something we begin by facing resistance, this invisible force is something that morphs and changes all the time to deceive us in our day to day activities. We all want to do new things, we want to work hard, and we want to be able to walk up to that hot guy or hot chick and get their number, yet we don't do these things, yet we stand by and simply watch the world go by - we forget the things that drive us and push us, and simply enter mundane life. This resistance is what stops us from achieving what we want, it creeps into the most protected corners of our minds, and infiltrates our souls.

Now let's truly breakdown this idea of resistance, how it occurs, how it grows and if it can be defeated. Resistance occurs when we want to do any task, sometimes it isn't noticed because we truly want to do that task and are excited to do it, other times it is very noticeable and this depends on the way we perceive the task. Consider the gym, if you have never been to the gym or are physically weak or fat you feel this energy come up when you think about going to the gym. It starts by talking with you, by duping you into believing it is making valid points, and then continues to deceive you into not doing the task/action because if you were to do it, it'd be good for you, but that fear that arises stops you - that is resistance. Something we don't realize is resistance never truly goes away (while for 99% of people it never does) it simply fades into the background when you have continuously tackled and overcome it, but once you start allowing it to dictate your actions and stop you from doing something, it begins to build, growing exponentially and unexpectedly, until one day you go back to the task and you feel this anxiety, this overwhelming anxiety towards the task, a task you have done before and did so with ease. This is all due to us allowing resistance to win, and to build on that momentum, it occurs so easily that we never think anything of it when it is small but once it starts picking up momentum it becomes nearly impossible to stop. The keyword being nearly.

Now what should one do when the resistance that was built up by their mind is overwhelming and causing an intense amount of anxiety? Begin anew, begin at doing the smallest thing possible. This beginning can start anywhere but the key is to start, let's take our gym analogy again: perhaps it is signing up for a membership, then just going to the gym for 5 minutes everyday, and "simply" walking on the treadmill, or perhaps you have very little resistance to the gym, but have a ton of resistance to reading (hahahahahaha you are technically reading this, so... that is hilarious). Now with reading you can start be reading a page a day, or an article a day on a topic that interests you. The key is to chip away at the giant amount of resistance so that you can conquer it SLOWLY. Everything you want begins by starting, by doing, to conquer resistance you must do.

*This topic comes from the book The War Of Art by Steven Pressfield not to confused by the The Art Of War by Sun Tzu.

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Skipping A Day

We all have the thought that today has been a long day, let's work on this tomorrow. Or better yet I don't have to do this one thing today ie writing, or working out. So we skip that day, with the intention to begin again the next day. We simply needed a break, but a break is different than not trying, what we chose to do with that, oh I'll skip today and continue tomorrow is we chose not to try. Whenever we have the chose not to try and we pick that we destroy the progress we have made and have to begin again.

That is the problem with "oh I'll start tomorrow" or "oh I'll skip today, I don't have the time", both of those statements lead to laziness which leads to not doing it tomorrow. The resistance of doing an action increases exponentially as time goes on. So this idea of skipping a day, or starting tomrrow is a foolish one. It begins with good intentions but does everything. Hitler probably started out with good intentions (how else would he have been elected), but as we all know his actions and perhas his intentions were far from good. Now the comparrison to Hitler and skipping a day of writing or a day of working out is a stretch but the point that is meant to get across is the same.

We all plan to start right back up on the thing we skipped the next day, and perhaps we have the will power to do that, but that next day is half-assed in effort, then the day after even more so, then it simply fades away. Of course you will hit a realization that you should start again, then another week or month or year goes by, and then the realization hits again.. Now perhaps you start again, all that progress is gone or greatly diminished. Now a lesson has been learned, that skipping a day or saying you don't have enough time leads to grave consequences.

Most of us see the cross-roads in which we must choose our action, where we can decide to give ourselves an excuse or we push onwards to continue our ascent to something more than nothing.

Pick wisely.

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Whenever we as people enter a state of repair, where we have noticed how our lives are falling apart and go to fix them we tend to attempt to fix everything all at once. We want to get better as soon as possible, so we focus on everything we see jumping from thing to thing all at once. This attempt is a noble one, yet extremely foolish.

Most people struggle to focus on one task for more than 25 minutes, yet they all attempt to conquer their entire lives in an instant, once again noble yet foolish. Pick one area, pick one area of your life that you are unhappy with, that you want to repair - stick with that one area until you have a solid grasp on it. This allows you to truly capture the good habits that will help you in that area of life, and not lose them the second you switch to a different area of your life. Build upon one good thing, expanding outwards - this alone will help you.

Let's say your area is health, now let's pick a habit: Exercise, okay now what? Let's see how we can keep consistency with that habit: Going on a 45 minute walk everyday. Okay, how long should you do that for before adding something else? Depends, consider you at your weakest state, that is how long you should do it for before adding more to it. Let us assume it's been 30 days, you have been going on a walk for 45 minutes a day, and loving it. Now let's add more to that, you are wanting to start intermitting fasting, then add that ON TOP OF going for a walk for 45 minutes a day. Then give this new habit some time to set in. Then pick the next thing, perhaps it is in a different area of your life, that is fine, but the focus here is taking one thing at a time and really building something solid out of it, before running to the next thing.

This is a habit in itself. We want the world, but lack the patience to conquer one little thing at a time, it all adds up - the good, the bad and the ugly.

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An Unexpected Consequence Of Greatness

When in the pursuit of true greatness in any form, you must go beyond the shallow end of the ocean and into the depths beyond where any normal being would go. That is the truest pursuit of greatness, not for stature, not for money, but to understand at the highest level to push beyond what the world currently understands. These pursuits are pursuits of madmen, insane to the eyes of all mortals, yet completely sensible to those that pursue them. Typically during this pursuit of greatness, and knowledge they land upon something that they themselves were unaware or would not like to admit to, which the concept of enlightenment.

Enlightenment may be the wrong word, and spirituality is definitely the wrong word, but they come to this understanding of reality of what the "meaning" of life is. This is typically achieved through meditation, at least that is where it is most recorded - though the question becomes, what is meditation? Meditation is simply intense focus on existence, or on the task at hand during a time interval. So what happens during a pursuit of greatness? It is an intense focus on the task at hand, and the realizations that occur due to an increase in awareness and due to the intense focus are the same from blacksmithing, to meditation and to music. It is this pursuit of greatness that leads to realizations that are inline with what the buddhist consider enlightenment.

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Your working on a project and you are hating what is coming out - cool - restart! You are working out, and halfway through you realize you haven't really been working out - cool - restart! You are doing your degree and you realize this isn't what you want to do - cool - restart! You are reading a book and notice that you don't particularly enjoy this book, nor is it helpful - RESTART.

We are in a culture at least in the west, where restarting or beginning anew is "wrong", where we should persevere and continue onwards, but is that the right call? Why can't we choose to change direction halfway through something? Why can't we just pick up a different book, when we notice that the current book is horrible. This is especially the case when we have put in a ton of hours and realize we hate what has turned up due to all those hours, yet we keep going - to what purpose, to what end?

Sometimes it better to start with a clean slate, start a fresh, hit a reset button and begin anew, and sometimes it's simply a little nudge in a different direction that leads us to spectacular results. The thing with restarting, is that it isn't set in stone, it is an ideology of "hey, we aren't entrenched in this spot", that we are similar to the mongols, where we can manuever ourselves, that we aren't in a rut. This isn't permission to runaway from something we find difficult, but it is permission to move away or to redirect ourselves when something isn't working.


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The Act

We write, we read but to what end? What is the purpose of reading and writing? Now a simple answer arises from that question which is: to clarify your own thinking and intergrate new ideas and concepts into previous ideologies that are held (at least for the most part). When most of read or write we consume and create, and yes at times we clarify, but we do not take the time to intergrate this new information into ourselves. We do not take the time to truly LEARN from anything. We are far too passive to actually do anything with the information we gather.

We know what to do, yet we fail to do it, what is worse is most of the time we don't even attempt to do it, and this leaves us feeling helpless and sometimes hopeless as well. Now we go back to the books, to the writing and we continue that cycle, of taking in more information and 'knowing more', yet doing less. So we keep going in a circle, the thing is we don't need to know MORE, we need to know less and do more. We already have a general idea of where to point our selves and where to go, but we don't go. We sit, we contemplate, we read, or we listen to a podcast, or listen to an audiobook - these are the all the same.

A constant stream of absorption, yet no movement. To what end? To what end will we continue to act like we are doing - when in reality we aren't doing we are simply absorbing information like a sponge. All of it going to waste, because we already know what to do. We already know where to point to move forward, yet here we sit.

Reading some more, talking some more, doing less and fading away to the black of this screen.

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It Begins At Once - Practice

It all happens at once or not at all. Consider the synapses within our brains - action potential - it is all or nothing reaction. It either sends a signal, or it doesn't. Now consider yourself, consider all the things you do - you either do them or you do not. There is no sort of doing, where you are half doing and half not doing - half doing is considered doing. This is essential to understanding how we function, and our expectations of ourselves.

When you plan to do a thing, or when you think of doing a thing, you begin to build worry and doubt as the world scratches away at your resolve - but then their comes a point where action is either taken or not, you hit that do or die moment, and the dice shall be cast. This is the moment where you either start or you do not. There is no thinking, their is only doing and not doing.

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Intensity of action leads to new found ideas, new ways of thinking and creativity. Intensity can come from the depths of a steaming kitchen during rush or from exercising (running/lifting/). This intensity actives something within that pushes us beyond what we believe we are capable of, because we have to - there is no sorry I can't do this intensity, I need a break. It is do or die.

After and sometimes during intensity we hit upon realizations that we could not make no matter how much information we gulped down, because we are no longer trying to actively control our thoughts, we are no longer trying to force a realization to occur or creativity to occur; we are simply too tired to think. This lack of "thinking" leads to the mind just wandering and creating connections to the various ideas and pieces of information we already hold. Nothing new is being consumed, all that is occurring is new synapses forming from old ones.

They say exercise improves the ability to think and memorization information, but that is a byproduct of new ideas forming from old pieces that may have long been forgotten.

So live with intensity, live with a vigor.


Note: You don't have to be intense all the time, but have some intensity every once and awhile. Otherwise you'll grow stale.

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Patterns Within Yourself

We all have patterns, sometimes they are called habits other times they are simply ignored and aren't called anything, but all the same they continue to unfold and shape our lives. The question becomes what are we aware of? What are we noticing? and how are we changing in accordance to what we are noticing?

Let's take an example such as blacksmithing and beekeeping, and how they are connected, the patterns from one will show up in the other, and not in anyway you think they will. They show up through you, through you the patterns arise between different things. Now these patterns, may be positive ie you focus on the details and doing things correctly whilst also experimenting with different ways of doing things methodically, or they may be negative such as self-sabotaging when you start getting successful - these patterns will follow you throughout life until you confront them.

That is the key point, it's the fact that how you do anything is how you do everything; cleaning dishes to picking up trash that you see in your neighborhood, from writing something neatly to messing up a contract. All these things are interconnected through you, and when you fail to deal with your patterns and habits, you will continue to experience those habits/patterns until death due you part (and who knows, maybe death can't even save you from your patterns).

Take a moment and think, think about if your patterns that you have noticed from previous experiences are arising in the current experience. If they are, what are you going to do about them? Sit around and be a bitch, or face them and take care of them and tease them apart.

Sometimes you do need to sit around and be a bitch, but one day you will need to face what you have been avoiding, it is best to do those things on your terms and not the universes terms - because the universe will fuck you, due to your avoidance and willful ignorance.

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Being In The Mind

Being in your mind is where amazing ideas come from and it is a beautiful thing even if those ideas are poisonous to you or others. The beauty of thinking and the clarity one can achieve while being in the mind is something that is astounding, but, and there is always a but - so if you see something too good to believe, look for the but, it's there - it is also something that can spin the greatest of all webs, a trap that is unescapable.

Their is a meditation term, called the "here and now" so when someone asks another where are you? They would respond "oh I'm here", this is different than the typical response of "oh I'm at home(insert any other physical place that we as humans have created)". To be able to be in the here and now is something that is not achieved by being in the mind, it is achieved easily when playing sports, or doing a dangerous activity or being completely absorbed into some piece of work (such as writing this hahahaha), because we forget of the existence of the world, of noise, of people, of OURSELVES.

Being in the mind, is wonderful you can create amazing things, both positive and negative, but when you are simply in the here and now there is only being. It isn't positive and it definitely isn't negative. That is what we want. To live. To breathe, with none of the pressure we have created for ourselves.

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How is greatness crafted?

How does one achieve the almighty level of successful? Does it begin at childhood, or the right genes? Or it is something more subtle, like a kick in the ass? These are all just assumptions, and stipulations - it doesn't matter which one is correct, or has influence. What matters is how can we do it, how can you do it.

It begins with picking a target, what do you want to be great at? What craft do you want to cultivate? For the sake of this piece let's pickw money as that is roughly a universal thing. Money has a bunch of subcategories, we must begin by picking one, let's pick App Development

Next step is figuring out the fundamentals needed, where does it all begin. now this part isn't where you need to know all the details. This is the part where you are simply trying to have a general understanding of how things work. For App Development, this can be done with an hour a day for a week, maybe two weeks. Now if you really wish to push it spare two hours a day on your new craft and have an understanding of the basics. Once you have an understanding of the basics and have built a base. You must begin.

You begin by trying. Now apply the principals you have learned. Does this involve some risk yes? Spare an hour or two a day for a week maybe two. Create something it doesn't need to perfect, it needs to function. Learn from the mistakes.

Let's say your feeling pretty confident with your skills, then start charging people, start putting yourself out there. Aim to land one single client, prove that it can work, that you can work. Does this mean you'll get the first client you attempt for? No. Does it mean it'll be your 100th attempt that you will land? Perhaps. Who knows, that is the point. It is building a skillset. Now if you aren't confident then it is simple, offer your services for free and get some real experience. "I'm scared", then keep practicing, but realize you are wasting your time because you can learn more as you go, as you encounter problems.

The key is consistency, and to continuously push past what you feel comfortable with. So that way you can expand into greatness. It begins with starting.

If you hate what you are learning then restart with something else. Realize starting does not mean commitment. Once you find something that works for you, stick with it for 6 months. Then decide on your next move.

Simple in principal, but much harder to accomplish. Think of it as consistency >> everything.

Personally I got lost in this post, thinking of so many different things.

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How To Be "Successful"

Easy. Work at one thing that can make you money for an hour a day. Master a topic.

Done. That is it. Yet you will fail at doing that, yet you will say "oh I don't have the time. I can't do it, or it is impossible."

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Angry Anger

What the fuck is anger? What is it's purpose? Is it trying to force a decision? Is it trying to create something out of nothing? Anger sometimes arises out of nothing, perhaps something someone said off handedly or maybe a deep seeded resentment that was never dealt with. Though none of that provides a concrete answer to what anger is.

Anger...what could it be? What is it doing? Ah, it doesn't matter what anger is. It is showing what needs to be shown - meaning it is pointing in a direction which has been avoided. Now this may be hidden amongst the various and most likely numerous lies. Picking them apart and slowly getting to the heart of the issue, where did this anger come from? Where is it pointing, is what that anger is there for. To teach. To instruct.

So what is anger? It is a compass and you are the map.

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The thing most people want is to be acknowledged, from the shores of Hội An to the high rises of New York, we all want to be acknowledged. No one wants to be invisible - now at times we want to APPEAR invisible but we do not wish to BE invisible, or perhaps we do; yet if it were to occur we would want to change and avert back to being visible, to being acknowledged.

Consider yourself, if you wish to be acknowledged whether by an ant or your parents or perhaps by your significant other wouldn't it be understandable that others you see on the streets also want to be acknowledged?

What is the point of knowing that others wish to be acknowledged? How can that help you in your life? Simple. When traveling acknowledge the people you see on the streets, with a simple head nod, or when you are walking around your neighborhood after being cooped up inside wave to your neighbors, or give them a simple head nod. A simple action such as those can do wonders for a persons mood, when they are having a bad day.

The instinct of a humanbeing is to be joyful when seeing another and this may trigger them to forget what was truly upsetting them and ruining their day. Doing this simple action of acknowledging anothers existence will do wonders for society.

Or perhaps it'll simply do wonders for you.

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Emotions vs Logic

Emotion can make for a dangerously great power, it can lead us to accomplish feats that we never thought we could accomplish, it can also lead us to places we never knew existed, but what is emotion. Emotion is a fickle thing, it has more control over us than we would like to believe, and it is all merrily a thought that causes bodily sensations; yet it rules us. Sometimes it arises like the wind, without cause and is gone just the same, sometimes it's a smoldering volcano preparing to blow. Either way we as people believe we are in control of emotions or more accurately that we are above emotions.

That we have logic on ourside, there is no need for all those stifling emotions such as fear, anger, frustration, happiness or love.

When we look at those who are 'logical' we see that they are ruled by emotions just like everyone else, they attempt to push those emotions aside and try to do what is logical, but that logic that they hold so dear is tainted with the blood of emotion. We look at the facts but those facts are overruled when emotion comes into play because emotions kept us safe, are you feeling fear? Perhaps this isn't the safest place to be; be on guard.

Emotions themselves are not bad, emotions that override facts are dangerous ones, or when the emotion rages so high facts aren't even considered. Logic > Emotions or Emotion > Logic, which is more accurate? Or perhaps it is in a state of flux, in which emotions must override logic in order to achieve something that one thought impossible, or perhaps logic must override emotion to stop yourself from screaming in someones face. Now that person could be a loved one, who would rather you scream in there face and express what you are truly feeling than to bottle it up and speak in a devoid yet logical way, which is strained by the emotions that fringe and eat away at the logic. The logic that was stopping you from chasing the impossible, might be protecting you from yourself. Who can say what is the right path to follow?

Perhaps knowing when emotions are ruling your words, your emotions and when logic is ruling your words and your actions is simply enough to exist without losing your shit. Perhaps these are simply the spewings of a crazy person.


(This originally was meant to be a different type of post, one about where emotions rule the masses, but it turned into something completely different. Such is the way the world unfolds.)

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Where To Begin?

When do we begin, better yet where do we begin? It doesn't matter the project, we all fear beginning, always unsure if it is the right decision or if it is the decision that will end up destroying our future. Now isn't that a foolish t